What would happen if the Clan cats got phones? Pure chaos! ILOVECHAOS!

Second chapter. Didn't expect this many reviews, thanks you guys xD

Frostpaw: It's more fun when you can wonder who would leave a message…and about Morningflower, I chose a random elder XD Plus in my la-la land, people go insane often. XD

Leafpool: Oops, I forgot him xD You can see he's first in this chapter though!

Halfpelt, Fernstar, and Bert-the-farting-hippo (XD Love the name): Thanks all of you, I'm glad you liked it!

Brambleclaw's Answering Machine

This is Brambleclaw…I'm not available at the moment so please leave a message after the tone.

(another voice) WHAT KIND OF MESSAGE WAS THAT? SPICE IT UP, YO!

Shut up, Graystripe!

(fighting and screaming is heard in the background)

Beeeeeeeep
Message One

BRAMBLECLAW, this is your momma speaking! Amazing how cheap cell phones are now! Anyway, I hope you've been grooming yourself on a daily basis! I'll make you experience the cheese incident all over again if you don't groom yourself more often! AND DON'T THINK I'M NOT WATCHING YOU, YOU SAD EXCUSE FOR TIGERCLAW'S SON!

Love you, sweetie!

Message Two

Toads are good for you. Call 1-800-TOAD-TOAD-TOAD today to buy toads.

Message Three

Do you know where I can get some more French Fries?

Message Four

Are you feeling angry? Depressed? Suicidal? Hungry? TRY DEPRESSIONZOIDISAREALLYLONGNAME TODAY!

Message Five

BUD LIGHT! (hiccup)

(voice) I knew I shouldn't have brought the beer.

Longtail's Answering Machine

I'm so hungry… (sad sigh)

I'm getting tired of saying Beeeeeep…
Message One

Hi Longtail, it's Cinderpelt. Just wanted to say your mouse bile will be a little late on delivery. When bringing it to you Squirrelpaw hurled. We'll be sending Whitepaw shortly.

Message Two

MUSTARD!

Message Three

WELLISAWFIREWORKSFROMTHEFREEWAYANDBEHINDCLOSEDEYESICAN
NOTMAKEITGOAWAYCUZYOUWEREBORNONTHEFOURTHOFJULYFREEDOMRING –

(voice) What is Russetfur doing blasting The Remedy into a phone?

FORSOMETHINGONTHESURFACEITSTINGSISAYSOMETHINGONTHESURFACE-

Message Four

(scratchy voice) IMJUSTACURBSIDEPROPHET –

(voice) What is up with these Jason Mraz songs!

(other voice) There was a ringtone sale.

(voice) Oh.

Message Five

I've…never really talked to anyone before…

(voice) Calm down, Webfoot. Calm down.

(shudder)

Sorreltail's Answering Machine

Um…I'm not here at the moment, leave a message after the beep…

(voice) WHERE'S MY RABBIT?

(other voice) Calm down Mousefur!

I told you, I'M TIRED! So I'll just play the chicken dance instead…-pulls huge stereo onto stage-
Message One

PIZZA SHALL RULE ALL OF YOU!

(other voice) What are you doing, Crowfeather!

(voice) He stole my soda, the thief.

Message Two

My hotel looks really cool…

(voice) We're...in my basement...

Message Three

MY BATHROOM TUB IS GOING TO EAT ME! AHH!

(terrifying screams)

Message Four

A-b-c-d-e-f-g-h-i-j-k-l-m-n-o-p-q-r-s-t-u-v-w-x-y-z Now I know my A-B-Cs…

Message Five

I'm tired and it's three in the morning so I'm not going to write the last message. Deal with it. I SAID DEAL WITH IT! (spazzes)

Just had to do that…Anyway, hope you liked the chapter. I'd like it if you could tell me your favorite message, and give me suggestions for other cat's phones and stuff.

I'm doing two chapters for each Clan, maybe more if you want, and if things go well I might even put in StarClan messages.

Tell me which Clan you want to see next! And it really is 3 in the morning…At least in Georgia. Here in Hawaii it's only 9 PM. .

Changing the subject, expect more by Sunday or Monday!

Later edit, I'm back! I was going to update earlier but I had no time. Oh well, I'm home now and slept for 17 hours today…plus it's 12 AM ALREADY! XD Really strange, cuz probably I won't be asleep till 1 or 2 in the morning at this rate…XD But enough rambling, expect more soon!

Vix