"Professor Dumbledore!" gasped Hermione, scandalized, "That is not an appropriate game to play!" She stood up and attempted to walk out the door, only to be repelled by an invisible barrier. She turned back to him, "This is not funny."
"Since you seem to know the rules already, would you mind helping me explain?" asked Professor Dumbledore, an innocent bewildered old-man smile on his face. Hermione sighed in resignation and sat down at the table. Albus motioned for the others to join her, and they did so, most with trepidation on their faces.
"So… what exactly is this?" asked Ron.
"Well, Mr. Weasley, the game ahem the ancient ritual is performed as Miss Granger will now explain," said Albus.
"Everyone sits around a table, and they each have a glass of an alcoholic beverage, in this case, brandy. The first person begins and says "I never" and then gives an example of something that he or she has never done. All those who have performed said act drink," Hermione explained petulantly.
Albus then added another point, "The room has been spelled to insure the honesty of the participants. Meaning you cannot drink if you have not performed the deed, and you cannot refrain from drinking if you have." At this, the Slytherins, and a couple others, looked disappointed. "Let the games ahem the ritual begin!"
Hagrid looked at Dumbledore concernedly, "'Ave you been 'avin troubles with your 'ealth lately, Professor? You've been coughing an awful lot!"
Dumbledore smiled at Hagrid benignly, "Thank you for your concern, Hagrid, I'm feeling… perfectly splendid!" he finished with a mischievous look on his face. "Hermione, would you care to begin?"
Hermione gazed into her glass, and swirled the brandy around absently. "I've never gone to Australia." Dumbledore, Flitwick, McGonagall and a few others drank. "Your turn, Cho."
"I've never cheated on a homework assignment," she said, as if it was the worst thing anyone could ever do. Everyone but Hermione drank. Cho looked disillusioned with the world, and Hermione stared at the teachers with the expression of a kicked puppy on her face.
"How could you?" she asked, nearly in tears.
"Aw, come on! This is boring!" Charlie smirked at Bill. "I've never had sex with a goblin." Bill drank. So did Harry.
"Harry?!" exclaimed Bill.
"What? I owed Griphook a favor. What's your excuse?"
"Well, you know. When you work for them…"
Fred laughed. "My turn! Hmm… continuing with the theme of magical creatures… I've never done it with a house-elf." Hermione turned bright red, and her hand began to tremble. To everyone's horror, she drank.
"Who, Hermione?" Ginny asked in disbelief. Hermione covered her face with her hands.
"Dobby," she murmured. Suddenly a large crack resounded through the room.
"Mistress Hermione calls?" asked Dobby excitedly.
George guffawed, "Have a seat, Dobby."