Well, I hope you liked the cliffhanger from Chapter Three. Were you chomping at the bit to get Chapter Four?

Just as a heads up, this chapter and the next one are really, really, really random. Really. Keep in mind that no matter how frightening it may appear, it's all setting up the grand finale. Okay?

I'm also very sorry about how smashed together the previous installment was, I forgot about how this web site formats things. I'll try and keep it more separate this time.

ALSO: The last entry, Oct 30, Thursday, 3:14, is rated T for implied language. Do not read it if severe words are offensive, or if you haven't been reading fanfic long and/or haven't been to middle school yet and still have virgin ears.

Disclaimer: I don't own (insert name of chosen franchise here) in mind, body, spirit, or any other form of ownership.

And so, let it begin!

Oct. 28, Tuesday

2:37 pm

My comrade and I have done enough investigating and have deduced a dumbfounding result. Hidden behind the pooped on, slightly damp tapestry in the Slytherin Common room is-is-

"Never Tickle A Sleeping Draco"™ by GinnyWazlibRocks™ will continue after these brief messages. Don't go press that button!

Suave™ is Suave-goodness!™

Now that I have Botex™ I can date again!

Buy Harry Potter™ and the Order of the Phoenix™ and see bloopers with Daniel Radcliff™! Go get that muggle™ device now!

Buy my car™.

No! Buy my car™! My car™ is better!

No way. My car™ can whoop your guys car™ any day of the week!

Ha! All your cars™ suck! Mine will RULE the computer generated desert™/country

road™/tundra™! Plus it has cup holders™!

Get this baby™ doll™ that you feed then watch her pee™!

DON'T SMOKE POT™!!!

It's back to school™! Come on down to Shopko™ and save big™!

Closed captioning and other funding for "Never Tickle A Sleeping Draco"™ by GinnyWazlibRocks™ is provided by:

This Caucasian, blond™, blue-eyed™ doll can be you! She™ looks just like you, and you alone!

Are you sick of giving™ your money™ to credit card™ companies? Don't waste a second™ call now!™

Floam! ™

We're back to "Never Tickle A Sleeping Draco"™ by GinnyWazlibRocks™!

A BARBIE DOLL STASH!!!

There was Ken, with bleached blond hair, and a customized Quiditch robe. There was Barbie, Kelly, the whole gang of freakishly thin girls that have permanently pointed toes at an angle that would most defiantly give you carpel tunnel syndrome in your feet.

They could've been anyone's, but spelled in white on the back of Ken's robes were the six letters:

M A L F O Y

George nearly passed out when he saw the Fariytopia set. It was an entire collection; all stored "secretly" behind the tapestry.

Halloween is coming. Let's see how Barbie's convertible reacts to my buddy, Mr. Firecracker.

Damnit. I wasn't supposed to reveal that stuff on operation "Heat it up"-

Damnit!

This is Fred signing off. (And hoping George doesn't read this, for many a reason.)

Ten minutes after previous entry…

Well George hasn't lost this, or been ambushed by a Shade and forced to magically transport. He did, however, read it. He was washing my mouth out with soap before you could say s. (Stupid anti-swear quills. Why do we even make these?!)

My dear brother has also tried to whiteout the "dirty words" and replace them with things like "Oh Fiddle Sticks!" and "Well shucks!" but I had put an impenetrable charm on it, in case anyone tried to steal. Apparently, said charm has a side affect of repelling any mistake fixing liquids.

While this entry was completely worthless expedition wise, I believe in documenting the social interactions as well.

This is Fred, signing off.

Oct 29, Wednesday

3:20 pm

I'm so bored. George is playing go fish with himself. The sad thing is, he's losing.

Originally, we'd be pranking Malfoy's pants off right about now, but with only a few more day until Halloween, we need to lull him into a false sense of security. Mwa ha ha ha. Ha. Ah….

Oh d. I just lost five sickles. I bet George would have two pairs by the time the other guy had six. It was a pretty safe bet, you'd think, until you've seen George play Joe Blow InvisaMan, aka, that voice in your head, which is often quite helpful. Oh, you're welcome!

Ahem, any ways… I really need a life, other wise I'll end up just like Joe here.

Hmm… I've heard about this really cool muggle device. The Whee, I think it was called. Am I spelling that right? Yeah, probably. I mean, how else would you write Whee? Wii? Please.

Back on topic: I'd love to play a racing game. Those games are the best, because you can run over the cliff and into the ocean, and it just resets itself! Isn't that amazing?! OMG, I know!!!

Back on topic: It doesn't work in real life though, because George and I tried. Ouch. Those FBI agents were never the same again, especially after that small boy on a tricycle incident. Or the elk episode. (I mean, c'mon, who know those things could run so d fast?) Yeesh.

Back on topic: The Whee…Hey George just got all the twos. Maybe Joe Blow InvisaMan, aka that voice in your head can be beat. Even though the past eight times George played him would prove otherwise, It's those d face cards!

Back on topic: The Whee.

Do I have ADHD? Because I'm finding it really hard to concentrate - look shiny! Hey, a spider….

Back on topic: D.

This is-

This is Fred, si-

Grr.

This is Fred, signing o-

Ah, you know the line.

Oct 30, Thursday

3:14

Bad news in the whole pranking department. Apparently Slytherin House tradition dictates that the younger years go from room to room, saying some rubbish like "Trick or Treat!"

What the h this is, I cannot fathom. Rumor says that it's from America, so it might be linked to the aforesaid Whee.

I wonder if it has anything to do with driving a car off a cliff. Or running over immortal zombie elk that run really fast. Children are pretty immortal too. At least enough to sue. But then again, that'd be a pretty complex game.

Back on topic: Oh, sh, here we bly go again. D.

George says I need to manage my language better. The little a-hole. But any way, he's setting up a "Swear Jar". According to him, if any one in the room says a word, or phrase, on the "Dirty Word List" they have to put in a knut. The money goes to the

Sunshine Sanctuary For Sick Dragons. Don't let my flame go out.™

George posted the "Dirty Words List" on the wall, and read it aloud, so we're clear on the "Dirty Words". Now he owes two sickles and four knuts to the "Swear Jar". The best part is that it beats you mercilessly over the head until you pay up.

Sucker.

And that lack of concentration in the previous entry was just because of oxygen deprivation. Apparently George was so paranoid about the Slytherins that he sealed of all air holes, but it's better now.

This is Fred, singing off.

Well? Was that a better length?

Sorry about the whole commercial thing, but my funding got cut and I had to put those in. If I offended any who uses or is emotionally attached to the mentioned products, I deeply apologize.

ginny