A/N: One reviewer said this was unrealistic but good. My reply to that is that I remember someone in the movie saying everyone will come back. So heck, I made everyone come back. I was originally gonna include a girl named Mana from Second Impression because I though at first it was a sequel. But two things stopped me. 1) Second Impression was an AU. 2) Mana was nothing more than another "snake in the grass".
And since I got reviews, I'll reveal one pairing: MisatoxKaji! You readers are on your own with any other pairings!
Another said something about Asuka, Ivana and WWII. My reason? Asuka's a bitch and is very good at finding ways not to like people. I never thought of Aryan issues. I purposely chose not to go into it that far. I'll say for the record that I believe Germans are not to blame for WWII. The one to blame is the leader at that time, whose name is NOT worth mentioning. Now on with the story.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ivana was to some extent, glad that she would be going into combat. Her success here on the battlefield would bring great fame to her homeland. Russia with a good reputation, one thing she's always wanted. She then quickly told herself that she must concentrate on the battle.
Toji was somewhat freaked out. And he knew that was contributing to his dismal sync ratio. If only it was Kensuke and not him. But then again, the fact that his sister was getting better medical attention made him feel better.
Zack was all fired up. Finally, he would see a piece of the real action. He was ready to show why he was the greatest thing that ever happened to Canada, or rather the world.
Rei decided that the best way to attack this strange enemy was to have everyone surround it. And she told her comrades to do so. Misato's voice came on the line. "Okay everyone. We've got some new weapons for you to use. Although you can hold progressive knives in your shoulder packs, we can provide you with progressive swords for greater efficiency. And we also have large sledgehammers too. Okay everyone, choose a weapon and surround it."
Zack chose the progressive sword. Ivana went with two progressive knives. Rei chose a positron rifle. And Toji chose a bazooka.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NERV HQ- Battle Station
"Someone's trying to contact us. Should we put the call through?" asked Ritsuko.
"Put them on," came Gendo's monotone reply.
Suddenly, a visual of a cockpit appeared. The pilot appeared to be of Middle Eastern origins. "Ahh, Gendo Ikari. So good to see you. I have one offer. Your immediate surrender and I will spare your EVA pilots and your personnel and the city."
"EVA pilots, destroy the target," came Gendo's reply.
"Very well, than I shall kill you all," the enemy pilot declared, cutting off communications.
Suddenly, two more arms appeared out of the target, making a total of four arms. And each of those arms carried a sword.
"Shit. Does he have enough swords?" said Zack.
Ivana inched closer. "We must destroy it."
Toji came on the com next. "ATTACK!"
Unit 03 launched rounds of missiles at the target. The target used its two upper hands and spun the swords like two lethal propeller blades. The result was the missiles being cut into pieces. Zack and Unit 05 attacked next. But after a few parries, he quickly realized four swords were quickly better than one. More attacks from the EVA pilots proved futile, as they couldn't get close without getting sliced.
"Crap. We aren't getting anywhere," said a frustrated Zack. "We get to close and we get chopped like firewood!"
"It must have a weakness. All things have a weakness," said Rei.
"Well, I don't see it," said an exhausted and wounded Toji. Toji's somewhat reckless style had gotten him in too close a few times and he took some hits.
"There. I see its weakness," said Ivana with some confidence in her voice.
"What? Where? I don't see it!" shouted Zack over the com.
"The best way to destroy will be to have an EVA jump over its head and its swords and fire positron rounds," said Ivana. "Zach, Rei, and Toji. You three will distract it while I jump over its head and fire. That should destroy it."
"And if that doesn't work?" asked a nervous Toji.
"It will be distracted by the Fifth Child's maneuver," said Rei. "Our chances of landing a hit in this instance will increase substantially."
"Heck, I'm all for it," declared Zack. "If it'll win this battle let's do it! EVAS! ROLL OUT!"
All four EVAs rushed the tank again. It began to spin its upper blades again. Units 00, 03 and 05 got as close as they dared, without getting sliced by the furious assaults of the tank. Unit 04 equipped another positron rifle and also began to rush the tank. Unlike the others, it leapt into the air. Over the blades… over the tank, until it was in the air looking at the top of the head of the enemy target. Without another moment's notice she fired a volley of shots into the head. The shots definitely hit home. The head was blown off. The whole machine seemed to shut down. Two seconds later, it suddenly exploded!
"BOOYA!" shouted Toji at the wreck.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NERV HQ
"The target has been destroyed," said Maya looking at what the computers were telling her.
"Oh well. I guess we'll never know who sent that thing," said Misato with a sigh.
"Not bad for rookies," said Ritsuko. "I'd like to see what they could have done against an Angel."
"Those Angels are behind us now," said Misato. "Commander Ikari may be an asshole and WE ALL KNOW IT, but he's right about putting the past behind us and keep moving forward. I wonder what crazy thing will happen next."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The ensuing Friday night. Misato's apartment.
"WHHHHAAAAAATTTTTTTT!" came a loud cry from Misato's apartment. It was Asuka, having another outburst. "Why does Wondergirl have to live HERE?"
"Asuka, I already told you, Rei's apartment complex burned down because of bad electrical maintenance," said Misato. "And she'll be sharing your room. Commander Ikari's orders."
Asuka may as well have died. "What? Why me? Why does she have to move into my room?"
Misato knew she had the upper hand and intended to keep it. "Or I can move Zack out of Shinji's room and onto the couch and you and Shinji can share a room." Asuka's jaw dropped when she knew the coming ultimatum. "Take it or leave it Asuka. Share with Rei, or move in with Shinji."
Asuka had no intention of sharing a room with a boy. So by the lesser of two evils, she would choose to share a room with Rei.
Rei Ayanami did come over. She did not have a lot of luggage on her. She quietly went into Asuka's room to unpack.
Zack shrugged. "Looks like Shinji and I are outnumbered 3-2. And there's no point in hitting on Rei because everything you say goes over her head and into space."
Suddenly, Misato went to go speak to Zack. "Hey Zack, do you mind finding something for you and Shinji to do this weekend?"
"No prob ma'am," said Zack. "I was already thinking about taking Shinji and Toji over to Muskrat Lodge to do some hunting."
"That's great, because I want to take Asuka and Rei shopping," said an excited Misato. "Asuka loves shopping and Rei needs more clothes than just her school uniform. While you guys can have what you guys call… male bonding. You know what you gotta do with Shinji anyways."
"No problemo. I'll see if I can make him a tougher person when this weekend is over," declared Zack. "No guarantees though."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TOKYO-3 CENTER- Inside the Wal-Mart
A/N: Heck, superstores like to expand. So why not Japan? And oh yeah, just to disclaim, I don't own Wal-Mart either. I won't go into details of what happened because it's pointless. I'll give you readers the right to use your imagination on what they may do while in there. (Greedy money laundering pigs…)
Misato and Asuka are having fun shopping. Rei was a bit of a downer though. Instead of finding something nice or popular to wear, she would choose the first thing that would fit her. But with some help from Misato, Rei had some nice clothes to wear too. Asuka went wild, buying many different types of clothes.
"That was fun," said Asuka. "Hey Misato, how did you come up with the money for all this anyway?"
"I didn't," Misato replied with a wink. "The NERV budget paid for this."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NERV- Commander Ikari's room
"We never should have let the staff have access to the budget," said Vice-Commander Fuyutski.
"True," said Commander Ikari.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Muskrat Lodge- Somewhere south of Tokyo-3 in a forested area.
Shinji, Zack, and Toji were preparing for their hunting trip. They had rented 30-30 caliber rifles to hunt with and wore camouflaged clothing as well. They also rented one of the bunkrooms for the night.
"Remember, take aim, and fire. It's like being in the EVAs with guns," said Zack. "Also, make sure you make your shots count. We get paid for whatever kind of meat we can salvage off the animals we shoot."
"S-shoot?" asked a surprised Shinji.
"Yup," said Toji. "And whatever money we get, we'll split 3 ways. By the way Zack, how did you pay for all this?"
"Well, the Japanese currency sucks compared to the Canadian currency. So when I made the conversion, I was rich. And if necessary, my father can wire-transfer any extra money I may need just in case," said Zack. "Let the hunt begin!"
The trio went into the forest. Zack shot 3 deer with relative ease. Toji shot 1 and missed 2. Now Shinji was getting his turn. There was one just sitting there.
"Just take aim and fire," said Zack. Shinji was a but hesitant, but determined not to let the others down.
"C'mon Shinji," said Toji. "Imagine that's an Angel, and it wants to us and everything we love."
The images of those he knew flashed through his mind. Misato. Pen-Pen. Zack. Ivana. Hikari. Toji. Kensuke. Rei. Father. Mother. Asuka. Then the image of Reilith appeared in his mind…
BANG! Everyone looked up. Shinji had shot the deer clean in the eye. It was an excellent shot and it didn't stand a chance.
"Man. I doubt that thing's AT field didn't stand a chance," said Zack. "You did it Shinji. Good stuff."
Shinji was glad to hear some praise. He was able to get 3 more (and with somewhat relative ease and confidence) before they decided to turn in their haul for some money.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TOKYO-3 Center
The girl trio was wondering where they should go next. Before they could make their decision, they suddenly saw an odd stand. So out of blunt curiosity they went to check it out. What they found shocked them. It was Makoto and Shigeru, and Maya, Ritsuko's employees!
"What exactly are you three doing here?" asked the Major.
"Uh Major Katsuragi," started Makoto. "We aren't getting paid enough at NERV. And since unionizing against Commander Ikari is just stupid and pointless, we've decided to find other ways to make ends meet."
"Yeah, so won't you buy a plush doll?" asked Shigeru holding an object in his hand. Misato looked at the object in horror. It was an 8-inch high plush doll of herself. She looked around the stand. There were plush dolls of herself, Maya, Shigeru, Makoto, Shinji, Asuka, and Rei in their plugsuits. Asuka was so embarrassed. Her doll had a big grin on her face and it appeared to be pumping its fist in the air. Even Rei was slightly surprised. But the teens decided to sit down on a nearby bench while Misato looked at the dolls. It turned out Maya had made the dolls, Makoto made the stand, and was the accountant, and Shigeru was the salesman. Asuka overheard Misato say she would buy two dolls. The dolls were put into boxes that looked like the computers SEELE would talk out of whenever they had meetings with Gendo Ikari. Unfortunately, someone passed in front of her and she never saw what dolls Misato bought. Then she was writing something down on a piece of paper and gave it back to Shigeru. Then Misato came back to Asuka and Rei.
"What dolls did you buy?" asked Asuka.
"That's a surprise for when you get home," replied Misato.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Muskrat Lodge- 12:30am, Saturday.
The trio scored quite the cash. 65,000 yen! (About $650 US) They also got a room with 2 bunk beds. Toji slept on the top bunk, with Zack on the bottom. Shinji takes the bunk bed across from Zack. Toji had already fallen asleep leaving Zack and Shinji awake.
"Hey Shinji, nice job with the deer," said Zack. "I'd hate to face you in an EVA with you shooting like that."
"It was nothing really."
"But when you overcame the fear barrier, your confidence improved," said Zack. "You shot those deer like you thought they were gonna trigger 4th Impact."
"Yeah, I guess so," said Shinji.
"If you take that confidence that you showed out in the forest and applied to your everyday life, people will be surprised at your change, and they will admire your courage and confidence," said Zack.
"Yeah," said Shinji with a wee tone of confidence in hi voice.
"Easy now. Let's get some sleep."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That night, the girls made it home after a long day. After shopping, they went out to eat at a restaurant known as "Only the Best". Asuka wanted to eat at a restaurant called the Sirloin Saloon, a restaurant that specialized in meat-based products. But Misato said no because Rei was a vegetarian. So NERV had covered their shopping spree, the plush dolls, the dinner, the gas, and Misato's speeding ticket.
"So Misato, what plush doll did you get?"
"Okay, since we are home I'll tell you. This one is for you anyway."
Asuka eyes glowed when she knew she was getting something.
"Close your eyes," said Misato. Asuka did as she was told. "Hold out your hands." She obeyed once more.
Asuka then felt something in her hands, which she obviously knew was the plush doll. She opened her eyes and looked upon the doll with shock in her eyes. It was a plush doll of Shinji Ikari!
SNAP! Misato had decided to take a picture when she knew Asuka would have a shocked look on her face. "Like it?" Misato asked. "Now you can snuggle with a Shinji at night too!"
"YOU THINK I LIKE THAT PERVERT? GUESS AGAIN!" shouted Asuka. "The thought of him in bed with me is more horrifying than any Angel we've come up against!"
She stormed into her room and shut the door behind her. She then realized she had the doll in her hands still. She placed it upon her dresser. It looked like Shinji alright. The plain face, the brown hair, the plugsuit. She decided to retire for the night. She changed into some nightclothes (No peeking from the readers please! We don't want an angry redheaded psycho on our hands now!) And went to sleep on her futon.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Outside Asuka and Rei's room
"Why does the Second Child show such ill feelings of pilot Ikari?" Rei asked.
"Oh it's nothing to worry about," replied Misato. "That's just her defense mechanism when it comes to dealing with Shinji, that's all. I'm going to bed. You should too Rei. Goodnight." She went off to her room.
"Goodnight Major Katsuragi," said Rei in her seemingly permanent monotone voice.
Rei entered her and Asuka's room. She was already fast asleep. She changed into a pair of the nightclothes Misato bought for her that day. And went to sleep on her futon with her last thoughts being of wonder about the Second Child's thoughts towards the Third Child.
Rei was woken up in the middle of the night by a sound. She looked around. Asuka was apparently up and moving. Rei watched as Asuka walked over to her dresser in complete silence. She watched as Asuka apparently picked up something off the dresser, walked back to her futon and went to sleep with the object in her arms.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Saturday morning. Misato's house
"Dammit Misato! Why'd you have to let Shinji go on some stupid hunt?" said Asuka. She liked it whenever Shinji would cook, because he could make anything taste good. Letting Misato cook could result in a date with death.
"Don't worry Asuka. I didn't cook this morning," said Misato opening up her second can of beer. Her first beer relieved her of her hangover.
"Then who is cooking?" shouted Asuka.
Misato turned her head into the kitchen. "Rei, is it finished yet?"
"No ma'am," came the soft reply from the kitchen.
"WHHHAAAAATTTT? Wondergirl is cooking? Where is that spineless idiot when you need him? Schiest!"
So the girls sat down to some pancakes. Asuka thought they were very bland. She liked how Shinji could throw his own twists on any kind of food and it would taste good. Her cooking wasn't very either, but it was better than Misato's. Which by default made Rei's edible for eating.
Rei came with a question out of nowhere. "Asuka. What were you doing last night?"
Asuka was surprised at the question. "What do you mean last night Wondergirl?"
"I saw you get up. You went to your dresser. You then proceeded to take an object off your dresser. And then you went back to sleep with it in your arms. And this morning I saw you sleeping with the doll Misato bought you in your arms," Rei replied.
Asuka's face probably went as red if not redder than her red plugsuit. She then ran into her room, totally embarrassed.
Misato was laughing. "The subconscious never lies!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Well, we're home!" Zack said. Zack, Shinji, and Toji did some more hunting on Saturday, and were now coming home that Sunday night. In total, they had scored 110,000 yen (equal to $1,100 US). After dropping Toji off at his home, the Third and Sixth Child returned home.
When they got in the door, they noticed the girls were watching TV and were surprised to the male occupants returning home.
"Ah, you're home," said Misato. "How much money did you guys earn?"
"110,000 yen. Splitting it 3 ways, we each got 36,666 yen" said Zack. "Shinji has quite the shot here. The other hunters were afraid to piss him off because his aim was so good."
"We had lots of fun," said Shinji with some enthusiasm in his voice.
"While you guys were pretending to be hicks in the country, we got to go on a huge shopping spree, and all expense paid dinner paid for by NERV," boasted Asuka.
"Oh yeah," said Misato suddenly. "Shinji. I got something for you. Now close your eyes." Shinji closed his eyes. She had another SEELE box. She also moved Shinji into a corner of the room so the others couldn't see what was in the box. She then said just like with Asuka, "Now hold out your hands."
Shinji did as he was told. He then felt something soft and fluffy in his hands. He assumed it was probably a stuffed animal. He opened his eyes, and almost screamed. It was an Asuka Langley Sohryu plush doll! (It's genuine!)
"Like it?" asked Misato.
"Y-y-yeah. Thanks," said a stuttering Shinji.
Asuka's blush came back as it did before. "Shinji, if I catch you doing weird things to that doll, I will bring 4th Impact down on your head and 5th Impact on your groin! You hear me?"
"Of course Your Highness," said Shinji with some false boredom in his voice.
Asuka was surprised to see Shinji talk back to her. She couldn't think of anything else to say and stormed off to her room.
"Wow, it's working," thought Shinji.
"Well, I think we should all retire for the night," said Zack. "School is tomorrow."
So they all went to bed. Shinji placed his Asuka doll on the dresser and went to sleep shortly thereafter. Zack was reading a magazine and called it in after about 15 minutes of reading.
Misato decided she would have another beer before heading to bed. After the first beer, she decided to have another. And another.
Rei once again noticed Asuka in the middle of the night get up and retrieve the doll off her dresser and went to sleep with it again.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: Now wasn't that all fun? There will be some more laughs in the next chapter! What happens when Misato decides to go out drinking (AGAIN!) and leaves the kids all alone? I can't spill out everything at once, because that is just dumb! R&R people. I appreciate the reviews so far! Be cool!