Chapter 17

Two days went by and Maureen didn't mention anything about what had happened, let alone leave the apartment. Joanne would try and coax some stuff out of her, but Maureen would turn up the TV and tune the lawyer out, so finally Joanne gave up and decided to go back to work since her stubborn girlfriend wouldn't talk.

Joanne sighed with a roll of her eyes when she came home from work one night, seeing Maureen lying in the same position on the couch, in front of the TV, the same location she had been wasting away in for the past two days.

"Maureen…" Joanne breathed as she set down her stuff and headed into the living room. "Have you moved at all today?"

"I went to the bathroom…" Maureen answered with out taking her eyes off of the TV. "Made myself something to eat, you see I'm getting better…yesterday I didn't eat until you made supper, today I made myself a sandwich."

Joanne flopped on the chair next to the couch, her arms crossing over her chest. "That doesn't mean you're getting better…it means your bottling up your feelings…"

"I feel better." Maureen shrugged, even though it wasn't the truth, she way lying through her teeth.

"Well why don't you leave the apartment tomorrow?" Joanne suggested. "Get some fresh air…go down to your performance space, you haven't been there in a while."

"I'm not ready to take that step yet." Maureen said. "Maybe next week."

"Maureen you can't stay cooped up in here forever!" Joanne said getting a little annoyed by the fact Maureen wasn't doing anything to help herself.

"Yes I can!" Maureen bitterly replied. "I can do whatever the fuck I want. Just leave me alone, and let me deal!"

"I'm trying to let you deal, but what you're doing is not working!" Joanne yelled while bolting out of her chair. She stormed over to the TV and shut it off, then turned to face Maureen with rage in her eyes. "I hate seeing you like this! All you do is mope around, and lay on the couch all day, wasting away! And you say its making you feel better but it's not!" Joanne shouted some more, unnoticed tears spilling from her eyes, her sudden break down sending shock wave through Maureen's body. "I mean everybody gets their time to mope, but you've been doing it for a long time, and I'm worried, I know this was a lot for you to take in, but…seeing you hurting like this, it hurts me too Maureen!"

"Okay!" Maureen said firmly while she made her way over to her fuming love. She soothingly ran her hands up and down Joanne's arms, before bringing her over to the couch so they both could sit down. "Okay…" Maureen whispered, while she wiped away some of Joanne's fallen tears. "If you want me to talk to someone…I will…"

Joanne's watery eyes met with Maureen's serious ones. "Really?"

Maureen nodded while she took Joanne's hands in her own, giving them a gentle squeeze. "If it means that much to you…I didn't know this was affecting you too."

Joanne sniffled while she let out a deep breath. "It does. I can't stand to see you hurting like this anymore…"

"I can't stand it either." Maureen weakly smirked. "I mean I still don't understand how talking about it is going to help me, but I'll give it a try."

"Thank you." Joanne smiled, and leaned in to place a kiss on Maureen's cheek, not prepared for what Maureen was about to do next.

Maureen slightly turned her head, their lips lightly brushing until Maureen pulled her into a deeper kiss. She wrapped her arms around the lawyer's neck while slipping her tongue passed Joanne's lips. She even felt ready to take it up one more notch, but a knock on the door put that at a halt for the time being.

"I better get that." Joanne quietly said, her eyes still closed, and her forehead still pressed against Maureen's.

"Yeah." Maureen nodded, but before Joanne could walk away, Maureen pulled her back, her eyes blazing with love. "I love you Joanne."

Joanne smiled, she hadn't heard, or felt that type of affection for a while; it sent chills up her spine. "I love you too." She softly said, another knock on the door causing her to break away from their small moment.

When Joanne opened the door she was surprised to see Angel standing on the other side. The cross dresser's bright smile quickly turned into one of worry, when she noticed Joanne's tear covered face.

"Chica what's wrong." Angel demanded.

"What?" Joanne asked a bit confused as to why Angel was concerned, until she remembered what just took place a few seconds ago. "Oh, it's nothing. Maureen and I were just talking."

"Is everything okay?" Angel asked worry playing in her tone.

Joanne nodded and moved to let Angel inside. "Yeah come in, everything is fine."

"Okay." Angel said, letting herself settle down a bit. She shrugged off her coat and shoes, and followed Joanne into the living room where Maureen was still sitting on the couch. "Hey sugar, how are you feeling?"

Maureen forcefully smiled and nodded. "I'm good."

"No she's not." Joanne cut in.

Maureen gawked, and Angel placed a hand on Maureen's knee.

"It's okay honey, I wouldn't be to joyful if I had to go what you went through." Angel said. "I actually came over here to check on you. We haven't heard from you in a while…do you need anything?"

"She's needs to talk to someone." Joanne answered.

Maureen sighed and leaned back into the couch. "I don't want to, but I'm doing it for Joanne."

"I agree with Joanne." Angel said with a nod. "You can't just lock up what you're feeling…you need to let it out, you'll feel so much better."

"I don't see how…but whatever." Maureen said, still a little bitter about the topic.

"You can come to life support with us tomorrow." Angel offered. "It's not just for people with AIDS, you can talk about anything."

"I don't know…" Maureen trailed. "It's a group thing…other people will hear my story?"

"Yeah but we all have our problems." Angel explained. "No one judges you."

"Please Maureen." Joanne said. "You said you were going to do this for me."

Maureen's eyes traveled from Joanne to Angel, both of them sending her vibes of encouragement, which ultimately made her decision. "Okay I'll go."

"Thank you." Joanne said with satisfaction.

"But if I don't like it, I'm not going back…" Maureen added.

"Okay…but trust me you're going to like it." Angel said while she stood up and headed for the door. "I have to go meet Collins now, do you want me to swing by and pick you up tomorrow?"

"No…I'll just meet you there." Maureen said.

"Okay. See you tomorrow." Angel called out and waved bye to Joanne.

"I'm proud of you Maureen." Joanne said as she took a spot next to her on the couch. "So proud."

Maureen just nodded and curled up next to her girlfriend, dreading tomorrow.

The next day couldn't have come faster for Maureen, she had twenty minutes until life support and she still hadn't found anything to wear. She nervously paced around her bedroom, chewing on her fingernails as she searched for clothes.

"You know what, screw it!" Maureen said out loud to no one. "I'm not fucking going!"

Collins, Angel, Mark, Roger and Mimi all waited outside the building, all of them waiting for Maureen's arrival.

"I honestly thought she was fine after the trial." Roger stated. "I didn't know she was feeling…well in a way depressed…"

"Well she did sort of relive the worst part of her childhood, almost got raped in an alley, and found out she was a mistake…" Mark added. "That's a lot to take it in…I feel stupid for not noticing Maureen's sad state earlier…"

Mimi nodded. "Well hopefully this will help."

"We should have went and got her." Collins said with fret. "She's not going to come…"

"How about we go inside and wait." Angel suggested. "She knows where to go."

"Lets." Roger agreed. "I'm freezing and they are about to start."

The five of them entered the building, each of them taking a seat, except for Mark, who was yet again filming the support group. The regulars filed into the building, all of them filling in the empty chairs around the circle, until all the spots were filled, leaving just one unfilled.

Paul looked towards Angel, knowing the cross dresser was bringing in another friend. "Are we ready?"

Angel's eyebrows knitted together in worry, she took one last glance at the door, and when there was no sign of Maureen, she nodded. "Yes…we're ready."

Paul nodded and he began the session. They were about ten minutes through the gathering when the sound of the door opening stopped them. Everyone turned to see who it was, but it wasn't who the boho's thought it was, instead of Maureen, it was Joanne, her eyes searching for her girlfriend.

Joanne eyed her friends, her eyes full of fret. Mark walked over to Joanne, quietly telling her that Maureen didn't show. Joanne let out a sigh and hung out in the background as the rest of the group carried on with their session. Not even five minutes after did the door open up again, this time causing all six boho's to smile. Maureen finally showed up, her hands buried into her pockets, and her head down.

"You made it." Joanne smirked, and reached out to squeeze Maureen's hand. Maureen simply returned the smile and headed for the circle.

"This is Maureen." Angel said while he reached out a hand, and pulled Maureen into the group.

"Welcome Maureen." Paul said, and the rest of the group greeted her as well.

"Thanks." Maureen for once in her life shyly replied, as she took a seat next to Collins, his strong arm wrapping around her shoulders.

"So what brings you here?" Paul asked.

Maureen was a little caught off guard by the sudden question, she didn't know if she was ready to talk yet. But as she looked up and eyed her friends, she could feel the support radiating from them, her eyes then landed on Joanne, her girlfriend giving her the push she needed.

So with a clear of her throat Maureen spoke. "I'm Maureen Johnson…and I was…sexually abused as a child…"

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I think next chapter is going to be the last...