Chapter 19

Dream Walking

"No…No please, don't," Harry grumbled in his sleep. Ron was used to hearing his friend plead or talk in his sleep since they had lived in the same dormitory for six years. He checked the clock on his night table and saw it was barely three in the morning.

Ron threw his legs off the side of the bed quietly and got up making sure not to wake Sirius and Remus who had decided they were going to sleep in the unoccupied beds.

As Ron walked over to his friend, he saw that Harry was thrashing and rolling around desperately trying to escape something in his dreams.

"Harry, mate wake up. It's okay, it's just a dream," he told him shaking him slightly.

"No, Uncle Vernon, I'm sorry, please don't, please," Harry pleaded. Ron stood up straight and watched as his friend kept trying to get his deceased uncle not to hurt him.

He had heard Harry talking his sleep about someone attacking him or Cedric dieing but he had never heard Harry have a nightmare about his Uncle Vernon.

"Harry? Wake up right now, Harry!" He yelled not caring that he may wake everyone else up in the room.

Harry bolted upright and looked around the room. For a second, he looked dazed and confused until he focused in on Ron who was worriedly watching him.

"Sorry I woke you," he mumbled.

"Harry, what was your dream about?" Ron asked him. Knowing Harry he would just say that it was nothing and to go back to sleep but Ron wouldn't take that.

"It's nothing, go back to sleep."

"Knew that was coming," Ron thought.

"No Harry. You were saying something about your Uncle Vernon. What did he do to you back at Privet Drive Harry?" Ron asked him, waiting for answers.

Harry shook his head. "No Ron. Please I don't want to talk about it."

"I don't care Harry! You tell me what happened at Privet Drive when you were little or when you went back over the holidays. Tell me Harry," Ron pushed him. He knew that Harry hid things from him and everyone else but he never thought it was this serious.

What did happen during the holidays when Harry was forced to go to his muggle relatives? What happened all those years Harry spent alone with them before he came to Hogwarts?

"Ron, nothing happened. It was just a bad dream. It was just a dream okay? I'm going down stairs," Harry told him before jumping out of bed and going to the common room.

Harry took a seat by the fire. The cushioning in the arm chair eased some of his pain from the dream.

He remembered the moment from years ago when Harry was just a young boy. The Dursley's were waiting for their breakfast. Harry of course, only seven years old was forced to cook it for them. As he was preparing the pancakes and bacon, Uncle Vernon had yelled for him to hurry up. Harry had jumped at the comment and caused the food to go flying. The bacon fell onto Uncle Vernon's hand and burned him while the pancakes layed on the floor.

Angrily, he got up and walked to the cowering boy. Harry tried to run but his uncle caught his collar. He threw him unceremoniously against the counter and screamed at him before throwing him into the cupboard and locking it for the rest of the day. Harry grimaced at the memory and pushed it out of his mind.

They were gone and he knew it. Uncle Vernon could never hurt him again. Dudley could never tease him again. Aunt Petunia could never pretend to hate him and then in private care for him again.

Although Harry hated the thought of his relatives, he felt so much guilt for their deaths. Aunt Petunia was the last remembrance of his mother. She was not like Lily Potter but when she wanted to be she could be tender and caring. Her eyes were dark and grey but deep down Harry could see a light shining.

Harry knew that he would protect the Weasley's and others with his life if he had too. He would not allow them to suffer the same fate as the Dursley's. They cared for him more than anyone ever had. Mrs. Weasley would coddle him when he got a mere bruise or scratch. Mr. Weasley would sit and talk to Harry about muggle items and would treat him as if he was his own flesh and blood. The twins would send him gifts from their joke shop and prank him as if he were Ron. Charlie and Bill protected him as older brothers would for a sibling. Ron would joke with him, play chess, and do whatever he could for Harry. He didn't have a sister but he did have Hermione. Harry protected her against bullies and would care for her. Hermione was also an only child and felt that Harry was a brother to her. Ginny… although she wasn't a sister to him anymore, he liked the way she would look at him; as if he was the best thing in the world.

They made him feel special.

"Sirius, wake up! Sirius! You need to get up now!" Ron had moved to Sirius' bed now in hopes of him getting Harry to talk.

"Alright! Alright! What the hell do you want at this time in the morning?" Sirius grumbled angrily trying to cover himself with the duvet Ron had taken from him.

"Harry was talking in his sleep again and I sort of got worried about it. He was practically crying for his uncle to leave him alone in his dream and I don't know… it was weird and I want you to talk to him because he won't talk to me about it," Ron told Sirius. Sirius' face became grave and he got out of bed. Decked in pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, Sirius trudged down the stairs and saw Harry soundly sleeping on the chair.

He walked over and sat across from him. Sirius watched as Harry tossed and turned before stopping and falling deeper into sleep.

"No, Uncle Vernon, don't…"Harry pleaded. Sirius watched for a moment as Harry spoke.

"Not the cupboard," he pleaded again. Sirius got up quickly and shook Harry.

"Harry, wake up!" he said shaking him more.

Harry's eyes shot open and he once again had a dazed and confused expression on his face.

"What was your dream about Harry?" Sirius asked him looking straight into Harry's eyes.

Harry looked at him for a moment with his green eyes before looking away and mumbling a quiet nothing.

"No Harry James Potter, you tell me what happened in your dream. You were talking about your uncle and a cupboard. What is it?" Sirius asked. He was not a bout to let the subject go easily.

"Sirius please, I don't want to talk about. Not now at least. Please Sirius," Harry hoped Sirius would understand that he didn't want to talk about it… ever. All his life, Harry hid his "home" life from his friends and teachers at school. No one knew the years of abuse and hatred he had lived with and he hoped that no one would ever know.

"HARRY JAMES POTTER! I AM SERIOUS! NOW TELL ME WHAT YOUR DREAM WAS ABOUT!" Sirius yelled. His voice was angry but his eyes gave him away. They were filled with worry and pain for his godson.

Harry sank deep into his chair and used the heel of his hands to wipe his eyes.

"It was from when I was younger, Sirius. Uncle Vernon got mad at me and made me clean the cupboard," Harry lied. Sirius obviously was not fooled.

"Harry, tell me the truth. Please Harry."

Harry looked at him. He really wanted to know? He really wanted to know about what happened all those years ago?

"Okay," Harry gave in.

For almost three hours, Harry told Sirius about all the times he was hit or screamed at or thrown when he lived at the Dursley's. He told him of "his" cupboard and how he slept and lived in it for at least eleven years. Sirius' face stayed grave the whole time through and he listened as Harry struggled with the memories of them.

As Sirius listened he felt as if his insides were being ripped out through his mouth. Harry had slept in a cupboard as a baby until he came to Hogwarts? He was beaten? He cooked for them? He did everything for those bastards and what did he get in return? NOTHING.

If Voldemort hadn't gotten to them first, he would go out right now and kill them, one by one. He was filled with such fury against those muggles he was about ready to just get up and rip apart the room.

Harry finally finished his story and Sirius pulled him into an embrace.

He held Harry for awhile before mumbling in his ear,

"I promise you Harry, I will give you everything I have and more. I promise you."