Chapter 33
Decisions Of Fate
Harry could feel himself once again fall to the ground. His soul was thrown into his body. The forced caused Harry to gasp for breathe and cough. He could now feel arms around him and felt safe and warm in them.
He snuggled up and he could feel himself falling into a deep sleep.
It was a depressing scene to see from the eyes of Albus Dumbledore. In a matter of minutes the Order had gone from triumphant to lost.
On the ground, Lily was on her knees sobbing. Harry lie dead in her arms, pale, frail, and sickly looking. She held his hand and kissed it. James stood to the side just looking. Dumbledore could see tears falling down his cheek. Sirius Black walked up slowly to his friend and laid a comforting hand on his shoulder while crying himself.
Quite abruptly, the silence was interrupted by a gasping breathe. Dumbledore looked from Sirius to Lily. Her eyes were wide and her face was filled with shock and confusion.
Harry gasped for breathe and his eyes slitted open before he snuggled in Lily's arms and closed his eyes again. His body relaxed and silence filled the room again.
"He's alive," Lily yelled, her voice watery from the tears, "He's alive! James! He's alive!"
Albus moved forward and conjured up one of the portkey's he created. He looked at Lily and handed it to her, "It will activate in thirty seconds. You, James, Harry, Sirius, and Remus go together. Severus will come with my group," Dumbledore said quietly giving them the old boot. Lily took it and Sirius and Remus pushed James forward.
"Ten seconds," Dumbledore said.
Suddenly, they felt a pull behind their navel and they were going back; back to Hogwarts.
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
The clocks sound could be heard throughout the castle. Others had gone home while the Weasley family, the Potter's, and Hermione sat waiting outside the hospital wing. It was quite early now; almost 3:30 in the morning.
Fred and George kept trying to stay awake so when one of their heads would loll forward the other would slap them. Every couple of minutes you could hear one twin saw "ow" and the other apologize. Hermione and Ron were sitting on the ground, leant up against a wall trying to keep themselves occupied by counting the floor tiles. Bill was sitting with his girlfriend Fleur who was keeping him awake with her annoying banter. Charlie had decided on a different approach: Remus, Sirius, and himself had drunk over four cups of coffee and were bouncing off the walls at the moment. Molly was fussing over Ginny who kept trying to push her away and Arthur was standing up, swaying every couple of seconds when he was close to sleeping.
Madame Pomfrey came out of the hospital wing grimly wiping her hands and forehead with a scarf.
The group immediately got up and ran up to the nurse.
"Is he okay?" everyone asked at the same time.
Madame Pomfrey took a deep breathe, "Not quite. Mr. Potter seems to have been tortured for hours a day from the time he was captured to the time he was taken back. My wand can not even count how many times the cruciatus curse was put on him. Dear lord, this boy was even skimmed by the killing curse on his shoulder. He hasn't been fed much as you can tell from his appearance; probably water every two days, food every three. His cuts and bruises I can heal but he has such a lard gash in his stomach; the wound from the slicing charm was re-opened and I'm still having trouble stopping the bleeding. He will be asleep a lot, he doesn't have much energy. I'd advise that no one see him quite yet. He needs rest."
There was silence among the group of adults and students. People were silently crying but no one let out a noise.
"Can we see him?" James whispered to his ex-nurse. She looked up and for a moment seemed apprehensive. Finally, Poppy nodded and the couple walked into the silent hospital wing.
When they reached Harry's bed, they were happy to see him asleep and peaceful but his appearance deceived them. He was still very pale and gaunt looking from the food and sun deprivation. His cuts and bruises were covered with salve and bandages. He had blankets covered up to his hips and a thick bandage was wrapped around Harry's stomach; covering the large stab wound in his stomach.
The couple sat down quietly next to their dying son and took one of his hands. They were cold as they had expected but from the monitor on the bedside they knew he was alive.
They took a deep breathe.
This was going to be a long week.
It wasn't another week until Harry opened his green eyes to find himself alone. It was a horrible feeling.
After his week of loneliness at Voldemorts headquarters, he wanted nothing more but to be by the people he loved and cared for.
But what if Voldemort was right; what if what he had told Harry all those times in that cell were true.
During that week, Voldemort would find Harry weak and tired and would enter his mind. He would say things to him making Harry feel lost and unwanted; his biggest fear.
Flashbacks came into the boy's mind of his captivity.
"You are at fault for everyone's death boy. You cause so much pain; why don't you just leave them all alone? Your girlfriend will be happier along with your little friends. No one wants you. Don't you think that's why you were left alone all those years ago? You weren't meant to be with people. You are a menace.
"Your girlfriend is next Harry; I will find her and kill her slowly and you will watch and enjoy it. You are the reason she will die."
Those words scarred Harry but he thought about something. Rose… Rose… she had said his parents… his parents were alive!
Harry began to sit up but felt a sting of pain wash over him. He hissed in pain and fell back to the bed. A sudden bout of dizziness fell over him and Harry fell back into unconsciousness.
Ginny sat quietly next Harry's bed reading over her notes for History of Magic. She had been taking her O.W.L.S and hadn't had a chance to see Harry. Since he had returned, Harry had made much progress.
Madame Pomfrey was surprised to see him awake one day when she was making a routine check. He was looking sadly at the ceiling and when he saw the matron bustling over he made an attempt to speak but like last time, he was unable too. From that time on however, Harry had been in a deep sleep that he would wake up at any given time.
Ginny had been spending hours sitting at her boyfriend's bedside either speaking quietly to him about her day or simply sitting and watching as his chest rose and fell.
It's funny how things can take a 360 degree turn from bad to worse.
That's what Ginny kept thinking of sitting next to Harry's bed watching him slowly deteriorate from the wonderful person he was to the weak and unhappy man he had now become.
Ginny though about her love, her Harry. She decided at that moment as she brushed the fringe out of his face, that she would so something; something to make him happy.
She smiled and took out a long piece of parchment and a quill. And so, she began to write.
Sirius felt himself becoming quite nervous as he made his way down the corridors of Hogwarts to the infirmary where Harry was set to stay until the end of term. His palms began to sweat, imagining the look on his godson's face at the fact that he had kept something so very important from him for a whole year.
The doorway of the Hospital Wing came into view and Sirius could see nothing but white sheets. He could tell immediately which bed was Harry's as he saw the infamous white screen positioned around it for privacy.
He could hear the boy giving exasperated noises as he could hear Poppy fretting over him. She was telling him of how his many adventures had always seemed to turn out horribly wrong. Harry chuckled and quickly agreed, not denying it because indeed, it was true.
Standing outside of the screen, Sirius waited for the matron to leave Harry alone before he came next to Harry's bed. He smiled down at him but did not recieve one in response. His face was stony and his eyes expressed the hurt and betrayl he was feeling at the moment.
"Hey there kid," he said in a raspy voice. He could feel himself being consumed by the shame he felt for having played with Harry like puppet all of his sixth year. He should have told him that his parents had returned. He should have told Lily and James they needed to reveal themselves to their son. He should have made this easier but he didn't.
"Hello," Harry responded in a dead-pan voice. He looked down at the blanket his body was hidden under and gave an involuntary shiver. Sirius immediately pulled the blanket up but Harry pulled back, "I'm fine Sirius."
Pulling away, Sirius sighed and conjured up a chair. He sat down and leaned foward, positioning himself on his elbows on his legs. He looked at Harry before he began to speak, "I know you're probably wondering why I kept those things from you," Harry gave a bitter laugh, "but I had my reasons Harry. I would never deny you happiness, you know that. I've tried to make you as happy as I could and I thought long and hard about my descision of hiding the fact that your parents were alive and I regret it but it had to be done."
"Why Sirius?" Harry said in a voice that sounded much younger than usual. Sirius looked up and felt a pang of distress as he saw Harry's eyes beginning to fill, "Why did you hide that from me? You of all people."
"I had no choice Harry," he said softly hoping that maybe he would understand, "I didn't. That mission I had before you left for school was for me to keep tabs on the things Lily and James did. Before school had started," he rubbed his hands together and tried to find the right words, "I had wanted to tell you so you would be able to know what was happening, I know how much you hate being treated like a baby but it had to wait. You have to understand Harry," he pleaded, "It had to wait."
Harry looked at his godfather, with the same pain that had consumed him over the past couple of weeks and nodded, "I understand."
As sixth year came to an end, so did many other things. James or Professor Hund left his post as Defense against the Dark Arts teacher renewing the legend that the job was cursed. Voldemorts hiatus ended as well; he had killed another two muggle families leaving the dark mark above their home. His reign of terror had once again started.
Harry had finally awoken from his on and off coma for good. It was his first afternoon awake and aware and the first thing he had asked for was to speak to his parents; the ones who had hidden themselves from him for a full year.
Lily and James walked into the hospital wing once again quietly. When they saw their son awake and sitting up, Lily began to sob as she ran up to him. Harry stiffly hugged her back still feeling somewhat angry but warmed.
She pulled away and looked at her son.
"Oh Harry, it's so wonderful to talk to you without having to hide," she said wiping away her tears. Harry looked sympathetic for a moment but put on a mask of anger on his face as his father came up to him with a hand on his shoulder.
"How come you hid from me?" he asked coldly trying to hide his emotions. The parents looked surprised at his question but they both knew it was coming.
"Harry," James said trying to comfort their son, "we just couldn't. Dumbledore didn't want to tell you yet and I respect his decision. And there were other things."
Harry looked up angrily, "So you wouldn't tell me you were here for a year because Dumbledore told you not too?"
Lily looked quite abashed at what to say. She sat there silently looking at the two men.
"Harry, please I know it wasn't fair to you but it was for the best," his father commented quietly. That set Harry off.
"Fair? Fair? When has my life been fair? I was born to kill someone in the end. I forced you and mum into hiding when I was at least one year old. That same year you were killed because of me and if that hadn't happened Sirius would have never gone to Azkaban. Then I lived for ten years with people who positively loathed me or so I thought. I came to Hogwarts and each year I would get closer and closer to dying and each year I would be sent back to my 'family'. What next? This year has to be close don't you think! Maybe next year I'll die! You never know," Harry breathed. His temper was rising as they sat there silently.
"So?" he asked them. Still no answer.
"I'll ask you again!" Harry yelled loudly, "WHEN HAS MY LIFE BEEN FAIR?"
"I guess it never was," Lily answered quietly.
"Harry we tried so hard to give you a perfect world but we couldn't… maybe you hate us for not telling you but it was meant to be," James said, "please Harry you have to understand."
"Why couldn't you tell me then?" Harry asked quietly with a trace of anger in his voice.
"Harry it was fate that brought you to the veil. When we first arrived there, we demanded to be let out; to be free to live our lives with our now famous son," James explained smiling down at his son, "but they said that we weren't allowed. Not yet at least; they explained the veil to us. You can't just go back and forth between life and death forever and whenever you felt like it. So we waited… for fourteen years we waited for you to come to the Department of Mysteries for whatever reason and for you to activate the key to let us leave that damned place."
"And?" Harry said interestedly.
"And if we told you, it would be a sort of violation. Fate decided when you could find out about us," Lily continued.
Harry nodded. For a little while they sat in silence until Harry broke it.
"I missed you guys," he said smiling at his parents.
They smiled back and Lily answered, "Oh we missed you too Harry, more than you can imagine."