A/n: This chapter has been edited. The song is "How to Deal" by Frankie J. The lyrics are in bold and italics.

Music box: 6: Pained Eyes, How to Deal

Sometimes a man has to choose
And do something he doesn't wanna do
Do I live my life with you as my wife
Or do I go on and pursue my lifetime dream….

'I love her but I can't have her. It's could ruin my chances of being fuhrer or it could ruin my chances of being with her.' He thought to himself as he stared into his paperwork. 'I don't want to live like this.'

I gotta do this for me
Cuz if I don't I'll probably regret it
But if I do I'll probably regret it
How do I cope

Roy Mustang knew he had to make a choice. It was love or his job. If he picked one, he would just lose the other. How do you make a choice like that? To pick the one you love or to pick the job that would change lives for the better. 'Nothing is easy in the world.' She handed him a cup of coffee and smiled.

"You're making progress today with your paperwork." This was partly true due to the fact he was reviewing his life decisions, when he was suppose to be signing crappy paperwork.

How do you cope when
The one you love is with somebody else
And there's nothing you could do about it
How do I deal with

'Give up. She's engaged she doesn't love you. Roy, get a grip on yourself.' Roy thought as he watched Riza pull her gun out and point it to Havoc's head. Hawkeye seemed to notice how focused his eyes were on her.

"Is everything all right, sir? You look tired, sir."

"I am fine. I have a few problems, that's all." Roy, tiredly flashed a grin. 'That is the understatement of the world.'

The fact that you had a chance
But you chose to turn away for your career
I gotta take it though it's heartbreakin'
It's something that I had to do
But nobody said that it would hurt so bad
So how do I live...how do I deal without you

He couldn't have her. He had a chance but blew it for his career. 'It hurts so badly. I love her.' He doodled on some report about a weapon maker. He doodled, a very small heart and inside he put RoyxRiza , this doodle was tiny and very hard to see. Roy loved her. He had to do it. He couldn't throw away all he worked for.

"Sir, Fifteen minutes till lunch." Riza said, to only receive a very weak sound resembling okay.

Fifteen minutes later, the door made a slow creaking sound and Riza walked in. Roy now was truly working on his paperwork. He had decided if he threw the love of his life away, to have a chance to become fuhrer then he better become fuhrer. Riza walked over and handed Roy his sandwich. Roy stared at the hand offering him a sandwich and he noticed the huge diamond ring she had on. With muffled thanks, Roy took the sandwich. Hawkeye seemed to notice Roy staring at her ring and she blushed.

"Do you remember that day when we were watching the sunset?"

"Yes." Roy's voice regaining strength as the memory filled his mind.

It's killing me to know
That your heart's with me
But you're with him cause I chose
To be in this industry

"I still feel the same." Her voice still calm and balanced with that same tone of coldness. Roy watched Riza in amazement. This was so surreal.

"You do?"

"Yes."

"Then why are you engaged?"

"It hurt being so close to you but not being able to love. I had to push you away; I had to find something to fill my emptiness where you once were. I got engaged to Rick, not because I love him but that I have move on with my own life." Those words killed Roy. It killed him to know these things.

"So you're only with him because I chose my career over you." Her eyes showed that she was in pain and the heartbreak she was going through.

"It's perfectly understandable, sir. You're trying to change the world." Her eyes once again became blank and empty and Roy did not dare look at Riza.

'But you don't know how much you have already changed mine.' Riza thought.

To be in this industry
Money, shows, and hoes come along with luxury and pain
Is all you see when you think about it
But this is the life that I was given
So I have to live it to the fullest
But how do I deal in the meantime without you

Yesterday, had been Riza's confession of still loving him and to be honest, Roy was still a bit shell shocked.

'I picked this for myself. I was given this life to live and I should live it to the fullest. I still chose my career over the love of my life.' He yawned to himself when he was signing documents. He was going to do his paperwork for his chance. He was going to become fuhrer, what was there to lose now that he lost his one and only love. 'Now what to do with all this pain?'

She lost him. She knew it. It was her choice to push herself away from him. She couldn't stand the hurt. He was the only one and she couldn't love him. It hurt so badly but she was in the military. 'I am too soft. I knew this was coming. To be in the military was the tough. All because I am in this industry.' What could she do without him?

How do you cope when
The one you love is with somebody else
And there's nothing you could do about it
How do I deal with

The pain was real, the world was tough and he was stupid. He was stupid with pain. The pain of loving someone you can't have. 'I should have known this was coming.' No, he knew this was going to happen. He knew but he didn't try to stop it.

"Sir, you look pale. Do you need to be brought to the nurse?"

"No, Hawkeye. I am fine." He lied. Roy wasn't fine, he was hurt.

The fact that you had a chance
But you chose to turn away for your career
I gotta take it though it's heartbreakin'

"Sir, do you need anything?" Anything? He needed her right away, right by his side, right in his heart. He needed it but he can't have it. She'll always be by his side. She'll always be there right away. He could hold her in his heart. 'Riza might fall in love with Rick and I'll lose her forever.'

"No, I do not need anything!" Roy snapped. His nerves just snapped and now he had a headache from too much thinking.

"Alright, sir. Are you coming to the wedding tonight?" She got up and left. Riza had a feeling the Lt. Colonel wanted time alone. She was right, Roy needed time alone.

He walked over to Hawkeye's desk and captured a photo sitting on her desk. The wedding was starting but Roy didn't want to go. Under a couple smiling was the words Rick, alchemist and Riza, military Lt.

'That's wrong! That's where I am supposed to be. It should say Roy and Riza.' As he leaned in closer to studied the picture he realized something. Rick was just like him, he had black eyes and black hair with a cocky grin on his face. He too was an alchemist.

'What the hell? She gets a guy just like me to…..DAMN!' Roy realized that she needed someone to fill her empty spaces but she loved Roy. She loved Roy so much, that she had to replace Roy with someone just like him!

It's something that I had to do
But nobody said that it would hurt so bad
So how do I live...how do I deal without you

His decisions were what he lived by. He chose this for himself and knew it. He was broken heart but he was strong. He knew that he had a wedding to stop. Maybe….Maybe she wait for him……Maybe she still wants him…..Maybe life isn't so bad after all.