'I wonder if it was all a dream; if I'll wake up and be 11 years old again and Harry won't go to Wizard school, and we won't be in danger, and we wouldn't have to move. Life would make more sense like that. Too bad I know it isn't, or at least the dream isn't over yet.' Dudley thought as he lay in his bed after his first night at Grimmauld Place. He was only half hoping it was true, because he knew that things were better this way, everything he had always wondered about his cousin's life and all the questions he could think of were explained away. As he slipped out of bed, and down the hall in hopes of making it to the bathroom without meeting the snake Harry had warned them about. As soon as stepped out of the bathroom he heard a crash and scream from downstairs and ran to the source of the commotion, not knowing what he would do if he met some of the evil wizards that they were being protected form.
He was quite surprised when he made it to the basement kitchen, he saw Harry, a girl with bushy brown hair practically attacking a boy with bright red hair and a couple the looked to be the girls parents, looking slightly ill and modest. He also noticed that the boy and girl seemed to have then same weary, broken look about them that Harry had. They were injured as well, but they didn't look nearly as bad as Harry did. 'That's Harry's friend, the twin's brother, Ron Weasley. That must be the girl he was friends with, Harmony or something. She's gorgeous,' Dudley thought, amused. After looking again he thought sadly 'but they'd all look better if they didn't look three times their age.' The girl had now broken away from Ron, to throw her arms around Harry's neck, who looked extremely tired and had been making awkward small talk with the older couple, and playfully tried to push her off, as Ron led the couple to a room where they could get some much needed rest.
"Oi, gerroff me, Hermione. You'd think I haven't seen you in centuries. It's only been two weeks. How was Australia? Did you find them alright? Did you manage to break the memory charm okay, no lasting damage?" Harry started firing off questions once the girl broke free and caught her breath a bit. 'Hermione, that's her name. If I remember everyone correctly she some sort of genius. Cares a lot about Harry, but fancies the ginger. Wonder if these ones hate me as much as all the other wizards do?' Dudley wondered. He was still nervous when meeting new witches and wizards, but not because of their magic; it seemed every time he met a new one, he was yelled at for treating Harry horribly over the years.
"Australia was brilliant! I bought some really valuable books before I finally found them. I found a wizarding commmunity and they had a book store, Walaby's Run and it was fabulous! I didn't put a lot into the memory charm, because the stronger it is the harder it is to remove and the harder it is to remove, the more damage it can cause. They filled in a lot of details by themselves, but luckily they mainly stayed along their original memories. Once I found them they tried to call the police but I stunned them while they were on the phone. The operator sounded suspicious but I managed to convince her that everything was fine. Once I broke the memory charm my mom was furious, because the last thing she remembered was me mentioning something about running off to fight a war for a while. I didn't really give them time to try and convince me otherwise, because then I thought I wouldn't have the guts to do it. The first thing she said was that in no uncertain terms, was I to go off and fight in any war when I was only 17. She actually started to rant on a bit and I think the look on my face gave me away. She was just like 'you've already done it haven't you?' and there were tears streaming down my face, I was trying so hard not to laugh. I just nodded; I mean the things she was saying! It was dead on. I mean the whole you could die, or be captured, or go to prison, or get seriously injured. I was ready to burst. She was pretty furious when she found out that she missed a year of her life. She was happy that she didn't have to spend that year worrying about me, though." Hermione said with a huge smile on her face. Harry laughed at her and started to pour her a cup of tea.
"Kreacher! Can you start breakfast, the Granger's are here now, so is Ron. The rest of the Weasleys won't be here until some time before lunch so you don't have to worry about them. Bacon, Eggs, Kippers, Pancakes and I dunno, breakfast-y foods alright?"
"Yes master, of course. Good morning Miss Hermione, Kreacher is taking your coat, Miss. Would Master like Kreacher to bring your muggle relatives their meals? Kreacher could put poison in the muggle's tea, he is being happy to. Kreacher lives to serve the noble Harry Potter, defender of house-elves and vanquisher of the Dark Lord." Said Kreacher, with a toothy grin. He had a look of admiration on his face, and Harry and Hermione chuckled.
"Erm, no Kreacher, its alright. They can live for now. But I'll tell you if they start to annoy me." Then the elf disappeared with a loud crack and Harry turned around to face Hermione again, and spotted Dudley lurking in the shadows of the kitchen looking absolutely terrified. 'I knew he hated us, but poison?' He thought grimly.
"Oh, uh, hi Dudley. I was just kidding about the poisoning . Kreacher's a little bit over enthusiastic. He used to getting orders like that so I just try and keep it as normal as possible for him without sending him off to kill the neighbors." Harry said laughing. As he turned to Hermione he added, "He's brilliant though. Amazing chef, dedicated housekeeper. He even talked to the portrait of Mrs. Black! I used to think Mrs. Black used to be horrible, telling everyone off like she did. Then I told Kreacher to tell her everything, about Regulas, Sirius, Voldemort and the horcruxes and it made everything better. I even had him tell her about how Bellatrix had been the one to kill Sirius after all that, even when she knew the truth and now she hates her. She apologized to Sirius and Fred and pretty much every Order member she's seen since. She's actually kind of sweet now. She's even told me how to take down some of the less desirable items out of the house."
"Well as long as he doesn't actually poison us. I'm mean hitting us with a fry pan is one thing, but poisoning us is, umm…" Dudley trailed off as the dingy little basement kitchen window popped open.
Harry looked up as 11 or 12 owls flew into the house with various items packages and letters attached to them. Dudley was immensely fascinated by this. Harry started to read one of the letters while Hermione paid an owl carrying a newspaper, and read the front page happily.
"Ahh, excellent. Voldemort was burned this morning. They're vanishing his ashes later. The rest of the Death Eaters await the same fate, people just don't seem to want to be around that much evil for that long. Brilliant. Harry, I wonder how long before the award you an Order of Merlin? I give them less than a week." As she laughed knowingly, Ron walked in and sat down in between Harry and Hermione.
"Hermione, did you umm… tell your parents about..." He trailed off as she smiled sheepishly at him.
"Well I sort of told them that I found some one, I just didn't say who exactly. I know they'll understand it, they've been hinting at it for years. I mean I was at your house every summer. Between me talking about you and Harry, I'm surprised they figured out I actually went to classes at Hogwarts. I'm sure they know its one of you." Hermione blushed as Ron's ears turned red and he opened his mouth angrily to say something that he'd probably regret; Harry cut him off, foreseeing the danger.
"Hermione I'm sure your parents know its Ron, I mean everyone was waiting for you and Ron to get it figured out for a long time before you actually did. Kind of like me and—" Harry blushed, as if he had said a lot more than he planned. Hermione beamed and Ron looked at him appraisingly but he quickly changed the subject before they could begun to question him. "Hermione you were almost right. I got letters here for all three of us. Mine says that I've been awarded the Order of Merlin, First Class, to be presented to me by Kingsley in a few weeks. How about you lot?" Harry said airily as Ron and Hermione practically dived for their scrolls. Hermione tapped her wand on her scroll, and nearly ripped the parchment in two as she scanned it; Ron's hands were trembling so bad he had to try three times before he managed to tap his wand on his scroll and opened it very slowly. The all at once Hermione squealed and Ron started to laugh.
"Order of Merlin, Second Class! Oh my goodness! I have to go and wake my parents! This is something they'll understand! Oh my!" Hermione was screaming as she bounded our the room to go find her parents. Ron had a pale, shaky smile on his face.
"Second Class, just like Hermione. This is brilliant. I thought if you got First Class we'd be getting a slap on the back. I mean you were bloody brilliant that night. No this whole year. I mean who the ruddy hell else could have pulled this off but you? I think I should fire call my mum. No doubt she'll skin me alive when she finds out that I've known for more than 3 minutes without attempting to call her. Where's your floo powder? Actually maybe, I'll owl her. Make sure that the owl gets there before she leaves, but until after breakfast sp she doesn't ambush me here." After regaining some of his composure and shaking his head a bit as if he was sleeping, he got up and walked out of the room.
"Umm, Harry? What's an Order of Merlin?" Dudley asked sheepishly. He wanted to remind his cousin that he was there, as they seemed to have forgotten about him when the mail came.
"Oh it's like a Nobel Prize, for wizards. Pretty prestigious, but I'm not fussed. I always kind of thought I'd get one. That sounds horribly conceited but its not really. You probably don't realize this but I'm pretty much worshipped in the wizarding world. It's a bit stupid really. When I first got to school I couldn't even remember the night my parents died! And yet I was treated as if I was a king. Everything I did, no matter how good, or bad, was exaggerated by about 100 times. So this isn't as big a shock for me as it is for Ron and Hermione." He smiled thoughtfully as he set his letter down and began to go through the rest of the mail. He opened a letter and a few photographs fell out and he picked them up. His eyes began to water as he looked at them.
"This is my godson. His dad was one of my dad's best friends. His parents died in the battle, quite sad really. He's younger than I was when I became an orphan. Name's Teddy. Take a look." Harry handed Dudley the photos as he wiped his eyes. Dudley looked down and was surprised when the boy in the pictures was laughing his head off trying to grab the camera from whoever was holding it. The most shocking part of the photo wasn't the fact that it move, but the boys lime green hair. As he watched it, it slowly turned bright blue. He was about to ask Harry who they boy's parents were when Harry burst out laughing.
"OI! Ron, Hermione! Get down here now!" He said as soon as he caught his breath enough, only to glance at the letter and fall into fits of laugher again. By the time his friends had reached the kitchen, there were tears running down his face and he was rolling on the kitchen floor.
"Harry, mate are you alright? You've gone barmy, you stupid prat. What are you laughing at you git?" Ron was looking at Harry with an amused look on his face, when Hermione collapsed on to the nearest chair into fits of giggles; clutching her stomach in one hand and the letter in another. Ron looked utterly flabbergasted, and snatched the letter out of her hand.
"What the hell is going on… Dear Mr. Potter, Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley... We hope to find you well.. are proud to represent each of you with you own chocolate frog card.. Guys this is great and all but it's not that funny." Said Ron indignantly.
"Keep.. Keep reading, Ron. You'll get there." Panted Harry, in between fits of laughter.
"'Stay immortal… Blah, Blah.. only the best and brightest.. The late Albus Dumbledore said he would give up his spot on the Wizengamut, Order of Merlin, First Class, and shave his head and beard before he gave up his Chocolate Frog card.' I told you that one was mental!" Ron finished reading in a cracked voice, as he tried unsuccessfully not to laugh. After the three of them got over there giggle fest they sat up and looked at each other.
"Dumbledore was the most mental genius I'd ever met." Gasped Ron, as he struggled for breath.
"Wait until I tell him. I wonder if Phineas or Professor Snape is here.. I'm going to go check; I want some one to send Dumbledore over. Oh he'll laugh at this." Harry had an entirely new demeanor. He didn't look so haunted now, and he wasn't so pale. His eyes seemed to twinkle with boyish amusement. The rosy glow that had appeared on his cheeks even made his injuries fade quite a bit. He looked healthier and happier than Dudley could ever remember seeing him. As Harry left, Dudley looked at the other two and noticed that they seemed to have undergone the same transformation. They looked years younger then when they had arrived. 'The old saying is true then. Laughter really is medicine for the soul' Dudley thought as he watched the two pore over the letters that had caused them so much joy that morning.