Chapter 9
James' POV
I finished my food quickly. I wasn't hungry, so I had to force most of it down. I followed Rouge back to her room and she sat me on her bed
"Let's take another look at your back…" she said. I could tell she didn't want to see my split open back again. She rolled up my shirt slowly at first, but then stopped and lifted up all at once "The cut…" she murmured.
"What?" I asked turning around slightly. She blinked and broke a smile
"It's gone" she giggled, rubbing my back. I felt her roll the shirt back down and rub my back "You're very lucky you healed so quickly, most people would die from something like that" she teased.
"Well I'm not most people, now am I?" I asked to her in a playful voice. I turned completely around, just to have her pin me to the bed. She kissed my cheek, then sat back up and giggled again "What?" I asked leaning on my elbows.
"It's just, you look girly in those clothes" she giggled, covering her mouth with her hands. I felt a sweat drop roll down the back of my head and a faint blush cross my face.
"Well if I had MY clothes…" I started. Rouge put a finger up, signaling for me to be silent. I shut my trap and saw her turn to the window. She got up and peeked out. I got up to see what she was looking at. She opened the window and jumped out. I looked down a bit nervous at first, but then saw her fly upwards past me. I looked up and saw her go up to the roof. I bit my lip and ran out of her room. I got to the elevator and got myself to the roof. I got out and looked around. I saw Rouge land on the roof and look around. She seemed to ready herself incase of an attack. I walked closer over to her, but as I got closer to her, she turned in my direction, then backed up and gasped. I turned to look behind me, but saw nothing there. I looked back at her and she backed up again
"Get away from me" she started. I blinked and shook my head "Get away" she repeated. I saw her ready herself. I backed up and put my hands in front of me, but noticed they weren't my hands. My right hand was under a white robe, while my left was a demonic blue, with black spikes. I looked myself over and realized I looked identical to the hedgehog from my encounter. I backed up and felt like I had split from the creature. It now stood in front of me. Rouge walked around it and saw me. She rushed to my side and looked at the creature. I guess I looked like myself again, as she was no longer avoiding me. "Who are you?" she asked, looking the creature over. It put out its white, angel-like hand.
"I am Disfigment" it said looking down at us. I now saw the true height of this monster. It was about 12 feet tall. Its wings were both about twice its size. It reached out at Rouge. She backed away from it quickly. It turned and looked at me, reaching for me with its demonic claw. I watched as it touched my cheek "Disfigment the Nothing" it repeated. I felt a cold chill on my cheek as it made contact. Rouge watched and then stepped forward. It turned back to her and put its angelic hand out to her. She hesitated, then placed her hand on its. It nodded to her and then took its hand from my cheek and took my hand "Come with me" it insisted. It lifted us up and soon I felt everything around us fading. Rouge looked around, looking worried. Soon everything was white and then we were surrounded by the blackness of space. We looked around and saw Earth floating down below us. I turned to look over the beautiful planet. I felt my hand leave Disfigment. I turned and saw Rouge wasn't holding on any longer either. "It's a beautiful planet" it said quietly "it's a shame its life forms are on a path of self-destruction…" it finished. Rouge turned to look at it.
"What do you mean?" she asked quietly. It looked down and shook its head.
"Humans, they care only for themselves and think they are above all other things, their selfishness will be their end once the Nova comes…" he continued. Rouge and I looked at each other, then back at it.
"NOVA!?" we asked at once. My understanding of a nova was a star exploding and if I wasn't mistaken, the word hadn't gained a new meaning. It nodded
"Yes, Nova, a being with enough power to repeat the effects of the eclipse cannon" it said looking into the sky "I've come to tell you two you'll have only a few weeks left on Earth, before it will be invaded, I wanted you enjoy yourselves once more, enjoy the remainders of your lives" it told us. Rouge and I shook our heads.
"Wait, why are you telling us this? Sonic or Shadow are always the heroes, what are we being told for?" Rouge asked shaking her head in confusion. It looked at me
"I wanted at least one of my children to have a good life on this planet" it said. Before I could question it I felt myself black out.
I woke up on the roof. Rouge was lying beside me. Just what had happened? I looked myself over and saw I was once again stripped of my clothes, but there was no blood this time. I looked at Rouge; she had a small white towel wrapped around her. I shook my head as she woke up. She looked down and quickly pulled the towel over her, blushing horribly. We managed to sneak back to her room unnoticed and get dressed. We spent the rest of the next few hours laying on her bed, wondering what had happened and an occasional kiss on the cheek from Rouge when I tried to make a joke out of it.
Jenn's POV
I slowly walked back into the base, carrying Sonic, "HEY EVERYONE!!" I announced, "I GOT SONIC BACK!!!" I looked around, but no one was there. "Oh so that's how it is? James saves Shadow and everyone celebrates…I save Sonic and no one care…oh I feel so loved…" I said, dropping Sonic on the floor and walking away. I rushed to my 'secret' garden and sat down on the bench. I sighed and kicked the puddle in front of me, looking at my reflection. All of a sudden, my reflection stared up at me, an evil grin on her face. I jumped onto the bench in fear. The puddle slowly rose and formed into another me, except she had longer quills and looked similar to Shadow, but it looked like someone left him in the freezer too long. Where there was normally black, there was dark purple and the red was a light lavender color. She or it, I can't really tell, had red pupils with blue where the white should be. I shuddered and stepped back as she came closer,
"What's the matter Jenn? Don't remember who I am? I am one of your other personalities, your favorite one" she grinned, stretching, "My name is Peggy, I represent greed of wanting everyone's attention, your gluttony over everything you own, your lust to actually be cared about, and your envy of the one thing you can't have" she said, stepping towards me. I flinched, backing away,
"G-get away from me you BEAST!" I said, falling backwards off the bench. Peggy stood over me, an evil grin on her face,
"You cannot hide from the truth Jennifer the hedgehog…rise my sisters!" as she said that, two other copies of myself, one that looked identical to myself, but her fur was silver and she had lavender streaks with golden eyes. The other looked like Sonic, only purple with light green eyes. The silver furred one stepped forward,
"I am Marie a symbol of your pride that you have long dismissed" she glared at me. The other one looked rather hyper, she was practically spinning her head around,
"I'm Emily, I represent the sloth and wrath you've longed to unleashed" she laughed insanely. I gulped and got up, backing away slowly. I turned and ran towards the base, but tripped and fell face first onto the pavement. I felt myself being lifted and carried off somewhere. It turns out they took me to show me my past, present and future(Ebenezer Scrooge anyone?). My past was Marie, showing me how much I cared about that run down car. How I thought it was the best vehicle ever created, although it was a useless piece of junk. My future was Sloth and Wrath, aka Emily who showed me my future was filled with death and utter carnage, but my present was the most frightening. Peggy showed me every one of the sins she represented; lust, greed, gluttony and envy. First she showed me the lust to have a friend, everyone always turning my back to me, always leaving me behind and making me feel sorrow and depression. My greed was shown by hard I tried to steal everyone's attention; it was all I really wanted. My gluttony shown by how much I make everyone do their best to make me happy. Finally, my envy was reveled in one simple name, Rouge. She had everything I wanted. She had friends, she always got attention, she got everything she wanted and to top it all off, she had James as that special person in her life. The . I stood there in shock at the revelations that were shown to me. All I remember afterwards was getting up and feeling the urge to sin. I shook my head and went inside, what was wrong with me?
I slowly walked into the base, my head spinning. I stopped in the main entrance and held my head because of the voices telling me to let them out. My voice suddenly changed and I was Peggy,
"If we left there would be nothing left in your miserable mind…" she cackled. Emily giggled,
"Nope, nothing at all. Nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing, and nothing!" she laughed evilly. Marie chuckled,
"And if we left now, we wouldn't be able to have any fun…" I slowly opened my eyes and saw everyone standing over me. It felt like they were taking over me. I closed my eyes tightly, as I felt myself drift out of consciousness and felt Peggy take over my body,
"What are you all looking at huh? You look like you've all seen a ghost!" I grabbed one of the soldier's throats and squeezed tightly. The next thing I knew, I was covered in blood and the soldiers were all gone. Oopsy. I stood up and cracked my neck, heading towards Rouge's room, singing,
"one, two I'm coming for you; three, four you better lock your door; five, six get your crucifix; seven, eight better not stay up late; nine, ten…JENNS BACK AGAIN!" I kicked down the door.
James' POV
I turned and saw Jenn boot down to Rouge's room
"Hey Rouge, it's bat season" she chuckled as she cocked her gun. I shook my head and waved a finger at her sighing
"I'm afraid I can't let this one slide Jenn" I said simply. I had decided Jenn wasn't worth dealing with anymore; she hadn't made any positive impressions and has now threatened one of my only friends. I shook my head, noticing she had not only gone insane, but also blew it with the make-up. Either she thought Halloween was early or was failing to try and scare us. I looked at Rouge and she nodded as I took her hand. I looked back at Jenn, who was taking aim at Rouge. I put a hand into the air, shutting my eyes "Chaos…", but I was interrupted.
"I'm not Jenn you fool… I'm Peggy, Jenn's Lust, Gluttony, Greed and Envy" she crackled shutting an eye "And I'm taking out the main cause of envy, oh dear Rouge" she finished. As the gun fired I glared and finished what I had started
"CONTROL!!" I boomed. The bullet froze inches from Rouge. She walked around it and we walked out of the door passing 'Peggy'. We headed outside and once we were far enough from the base I deactivated Chaos Control. We returned to my small 'shack' and the two of us sat down in my small wish-I-could-call-a-bed. We cuddled and decided this would be were we'd spend our last hours, before this 'Nova' showed up.
Jenn's POV
I ran down the hallway towards Shadows room. I could hear him and Knuckles arguing about something. I couldn't make out what it was, but it did not matter. I kicked the door down and cocked my gun,
"Oh Knuckles dearest. Could you be a dear and hold still. I have terrible aim with moving targets. Did you hear? Echidna season is now open!!!" I cackled, pointing my gun at him. He gulped and booted it, running past me. I growled, tapping my foot on the ground, "Oh bother. Now I have no targets. Sigh. Oh well…" I turned the left the room. I thought for a moment, and then collapsed. I slowly opened my eyes, finally myself again, Jenn. I rubbed my head and caught a glimpse of Knuckles,
"Hey Knuckles!" I said, running over to him. His eyes widened and he ran off, arms flailing. I raised a brow; I shrugged and turned around, heading back to my bedroom. I sat down on my bed and thought of something to do. I decided to go find James and Rouge. I looked all around the base, but I couldn't find them so I went to the Commanders office,
"Sir, I've completed my mission successfully" I said, putting my hand on my forehead in a salute. He nodded and turned towards the window, putting his hands behind his back,
"Good job soldier. Now for your next mission…I haven't thought that far…but come see me later…" he said, continuing to look out the window. I left the room and decided to go visit my dear old friend black neo sonic. I chaos controlled there and tapped on his shoulder,
"Guess whose back" I said, grinning ear to ear. He turned around and stepped back,
"You again? What do you want with me?" he asked, clearly taken aback by my presence. I giggled and wrapped my arms around his neck,
"Oh, you're not happy to see me?" I asked, kissing his cheek. He stared at me, trying to push me away,
"Get away from me you…you thing…" he said, still continuing to push me away. I gasped and put my hand over my mouth,
"That was very mean of you…I thought you would be happy to see the bearer of your child." He stood there for a moment and then shook his head,
"I'm an evil villain. Besides, I'm the one that tied you to that wheel. I'm the one that stripped you of your clothing and I'm the one that ripped open your stomach and put that stuff inside you and you want to be friends with me?" he said, crossing his arms over his chest. I crossed my own on my chest and nodded,
"I'm not the same person I use to be" I explained, an emotionless look on my face, "I've had many revelations these past few days and it made me think. Why try to make friends with people who already have a lot of friends. Why not make friends with someone that doesn't have any. So what do you say?" I said, tilting my head to the side. He looked at me as though I was crazy and sighed,
"All right then, if you want to be my 'friend' then fine. Just don't get in the way of my experiments, got it?" Black Neo said, turning back to his work. I sat down on his desk and held my rather large stomach,
"It feels weird having this thing inside me. I don't notice it at times, but when I do, I feel kind of sad, but happy at the same time, you know?" I said, looking over at him. He kind of shrugged and turned to me,
"You're going to feel like that until you give birth to my creation, so you'll have to deal with it for the time being…" he turned back away. I got up and left the room, deciding I'd better head back before I get in trouble with the Commander. When I got back, everyone that walked by was watching me, an afraid look on their faces. I shrugged and headed towards Shadows room. I opened the door and saw him lying there peacefully. I sat down on the bed and touched his arm,
"Shadow? You awake?" I asked, shaking him a little. He opened an eye and looked at me,
"Yea I'm awake…what do you want?" he said, turning to look at me. I lowered my head and looked away,
"Nothing…just wanted to see if you were awake…" I began. Shadow rolled his eyes at me and sat up on his elbows
"Why does it matter if I'm awake or not…at least I don't lie to people like YOU do…" he turned away, clearly mad at me. I sighed and turned to leave,
"Well…if that's the way you feel, then I'll just leave you be…" I got up and left the room, hearing him mutter under his breath
"Selfish little…." He had said. I walked down the hallway, my hands at my sides with my head down. I heard a voice from behind me and turned around, but there was no one there. I looked down at my shadows and saw it form into a being,
"Hello Jenn the Hedgehog. I've been waiting for you ever so long. If you come with me I'll make everything better…" the shadow said, holding out his hand to me. I looked at it, then looked behind me,
"What about Shadow?" I said, turning back to the creature. It chuckled and shook its head
"Where you're going you won't need him. I'll make you feel things you've never felt before. You'll feel like you're in heaven…" it cackled. I stepped back and heard Shadow yell from behind me
"Don't do it Jenn!! That's Mephiles!! He's going to kill-" he broke off, as the creature named 'Mephiles' grabbed my hand, dragging me into the shadows, where everything went black.
James' POV
Rouge and I had decided to return to the base after a few hours. The fact that we hadn't packed and that the shack had finally given in and crumbled after we got out was why we left. We both shrugged; happy we had gotten out before it fell. We stopped at my Star Bucks and each had a coffee and doughnut. We talked; nothing really different. We finished up after an hour of talking and sipping coffee. We went back to the base and found everyone was in a panic.
"What's going on?" Rouge asked the nearest soldier.
"Miss Rouge" he saluted "Jenn the hedgehog has been kidnapped" he said her holding his position. Rouge gasped and gestured him to resume what he was doing.
"Oh my… James, we have to do something" she said looking up at me. I thought for a moment and nodded.
"We do, but we'll need some help, you get everyone you can who can help, I have a particular someone in mind" I told her, turning and heading back out the door. I looked around and thought of which direction was north. I remembered the Star Bucks was west of here, so I headed straight, as if I had walked out the base and never turned. I walked around the few buildings that were falling apart; some I pushed, causing them to crumble. I finally got out of the city and started a light jog. After a few minutes I started to run and I was running fast.
It took a few hours, but I was back. The empty battle field; where I had been found by Dr.Eggman. I looked around, it had to be somewhere. I moved around some rocks and soon found what I was looking for; a small door which led underground. I lifted the door and headed down the dreary staircase. I looked around as it led to an opening, damn my poor vision. I couldn't see from the lack of light.
"B-D!?" I called out. I listened and heard his dark booming voice call back
"Who dares enter my domain?" his voice echoed in the large chamber.
"Who else knows you're down here?" I asked crossing my arms. He finally stepped out the shadows.
"It's been awhile James" he said, crossing his arms. BD, or Doom as he preferred to be called, was a thin, black furred hedgehog. His quills were like mine and Shadow's but with no streaks. He wore a weird brown robe with weird symbols all over it, wearing a large pendulum necklace. The most disturbing part of him was his one green eye that was just above his other two regular green shaded eyes. This eye was also a lot smaller and didn't look like anything I had ever seen.
I had found Doom one day when I had came back here to get look over where I had been found.
"Yep, it's been three years" I said calmly "and I need your help" I said uncrossing my arms. He tilted his head and turned his back to me.
"Why should I help you?" he asked, seeming to want to ignore me. I smirked
"Oh come on, is that a way to treat a former roommate?" I asked preparing to do something drastic. He turned and looked at me, a smirk crossing his face
"Well I was enjoying an afternoon alone with my favorite book" he joked "with no roommate to bother me, what could have been better?" he asked.
"Well guess what happened to me on the subway this morning?" I began "This guy started talking to me and he was acting real nice and I think, he might have been coming on to me, I think he might have thought I was gay."
"So, so why are you telling me this? Why should I care? I don't care. What did you have for lunch today?" he replied, holding back a laugh.
"Oh, well you don't have to get all defensive-"
"I'M NOT BEING DEFFENSIVE!!" he boomed "Why should I care about some gay guy you met?"
"Well I just think it's something we should be able to talk about" I began.
"Well I don't want to talk about, this conversation is over" he started.
"Okay, but Doom-"
"OVER!" I heard him begin to chuckle.
"Okay, but just so you know" I started and then started on a beat "If you were gay, that'd be okay, I'd like you anyway" I heard him laughing now "'Cause it was me, I would feel free, to say 'Hey guess what, I'm GAY!', but I'm not gay"
"James would you please, I'm trying to read" he managed to say. He looked at me "What?"
"If you were queer" I continued as he sighed "I'd still be here, because you're dear to me and I know that you, would except me too"
"I would?" he asked questioning me
"If today if I said today 'Hey, guess what, I'm Gay!", but I'm not gay. I'm happy, just being with you, so what should it matter to me what you do in bed with guys?"
"James that's wrong"
"No it's not, if you were gay, I'd shout HORAY! But I wouldn't get in your way. I'd be here, year after year and to tell you its okay, you were just born that way and as they say it's in your DNA, you're gay!"
"I'm not gay!" he boomed, laughing.
"If you were gay" I finished as we both doth dropped to our backs laughing hard. After a moment or two we both got up and put are hands on each other's shoulder trying to catch out breathe.
"Alright, let's get going buddy" he chuckled as we both headed out of the dark room and soon made our way back to the GUN base.
Jenn's POV
We finally got out of total darkness and it had taken me to a weird room. It had pictures of me all over the walls and the room was a dark purple color. It sat down at its desk and leaned its head on his hand,
"Welcome to my humble abode Jennifer. I'm glad you could finally make it. Make yourself at home, since you won't be leaving!" he cackled evilly. "Come Sheba, let us show her what fate awaits her…" he pulled a pink hedgehog out from behind his back and tossed it into the shadows. All of a sudden, there was a loud growling, followed by whimpering. Mephiles turned to the shadows, "I hope she didn't choke on a bone again…" he began.
"Not quite" a voice said from the shadows. I watched Neo Sonic walk out of the shadows, holding a headless wolf, tossing it aside, "Here's a bit of advice" he pointed at Mephiles "Don't touch Amy Rose" he boomed, the pink hedgehog crawling out from behind him. I stepped away, getting ready to boot it. I made my way to the door, putting my hand on the door knob. I heard Mephiles boom out, despite his shock,
"Don't touch that door knob or you'll die in a split second or you'll die faster" he said. I gulped and moved away from the door, leaning against the wall. He turned his attention back to Neo, "How could you…you killed my only friend. Now YOU'RE GOING TO PA-" he was interrupted by Neo, as Mephiles was electrocuted,
"Don't back sass me…" he simply said, turning towards the pink hedgehog, "Come Amy" he returned into the shadows with her and they were suddenly gone(James: OMG). I looked around and shrugged, sitting down on the chair behind Mephiles' desk. I stood up and took out the emeralds,
"CHAOS CONTROL!" I said, but nothing happened. I growled and tried again, but nothing happened yet again. I snarled and smashed the emeralds in my hands. I looked down and sweat dropped, "The Commanders not going to like this…worse yet…SHADOWS not gonna like this…" I searched through Mephi's desk and found emerald glue and put them back together. What now?
James' POV
Doom and I had made our way back to the base. Standing outside was our team, which I found very impressive. From left to right, the team included Dr.Eggman, Rouge the bat, E-123 Omega, Shadow the hedgehog (dang it…) and Knuckles the echidna (great…). We looked around to each other, Doom and I both gave a cold glare at Shadow.
"WHAT!?" he asked when we walked past. I walked over to Rouge
"Does Shadow really have to come?" I asked quietly.
"Yes, we need him for the musical number later" she sighed. I sighed and kept walking. Omega was a robot that was made by Dr.Eggman, except he had tried to kill the doctor on several occasions and has joined GUN. He was tall and mostly red and built to destroy. I looked at him and he nodded back at me. Doom and I joined the others in line. Rouge stepped foreword and stood in front us. "Alright listen up, our mission is to find and rescue Jenn the hedgehog, it'll be a tuff mission, but because of our writers, we will all come out of this alive" she stopped and looked at Knuckles "Well okay, most of us will. Now-" She was cut off.
"Wait, what do you mean MOST of us?" Knuckles boomed as he stepped foreword.
"The plan" Rouge continued ignoring him "Is simple. We start by infiltrating the enemy base then we find where Jenn is being held and finally we rescue her and get out of there." She put a hand on Knuckles' shoulder "If things get scarce, we're counting on you for a distraction" she told him. He nodded and gave her a thumbs up
"I'll crush anything in our path" he assured her. I put up my hand and she nodded to me.
"Umm, how the hell do we find out where she is or who kidnapped her?" I asked. Rouge bit her lip and pulled out a small package of paper.
"I decided to cheat and just checked over what had happened in the script, so we're just using the excuse that we had an 'anonymous' hint" a light blush covering her face as she turned her back to us "Now, let's get going" she ordered. She turned and looked to me "Everyone, get close to James, or someone else who's close to him" Rouge said. She stepped over and took my hand. Eggman put his hand on my shoulder as did almost everyone else. Shadow had put his hand on my head. I shut my eyes.
"Chaos…" before I finished I shoved Shadow so he wasn't touching me "CONTROL!!" I smirked as we vanished without Shadow.
We arrived on Blue Island and everyone let go. Rouge looked around
"Where's Shadow?" she asked looking at me. I rolled my eyes and shrugged.
"I guess he had second opinions…" I lied. Rouge sighed and we snuck into the base. Rouge led the way, Omega and Knuckles taking out the guards and dealing with any monsters that got in our way. We got to a small fork in the passageways.
"Alright, Eggman and Doom, you guys go down that hallway and get the Chaos emeralds these guys have taken from our vault, Omega and Knuckles, you two go this way and destroy the Island's generator, James and I will go rescue Jenn" Rouge explained. Everyone nodded.
"Let's crush this cosmic rock ball!" Knuckles encouraged. Omega triggered something in his arms, making his hands switch to machine guns. Eggman looked at Doom and nodded. We split up and headed our separate ways. Rouge and I got to a small passageway and saw a massive beast guarding our path.
"How do we get through?" Rouge questioned. I was about to pull out another of my small 'smoke' balls, when we heard a very grumpy voice come from behind us.
"Leave it to me" grumbled Shadow as he passed, giving me a cold glare.
"Shadow, how'd you get here?" Rouge questioned.
"Yes and why?" I asked annoyed.
"Well if you must know I had a Chaos Emerald and warped myself here, no thanks to a certain hedgehog who PUSHED ME AT THE LAST SECOND!!" he boomed glaring at me. Rouge looked at me, but before she could say anything the beast had started running at us "Get going" Shadow insisted as he charged at the beast. Rouge and I ran around it and headed to the door. Rouge and I kicked it down and saw a very odd sight. There was Jenn, sitting with the Chaos Emeralds and a paralyzed Mephiles on the ground, oh wait… I'm not suppose to know his name yet, oh well I peek at the script too, so sue me. We walked in and looked at Jenn. She got up and looked back.
"Thanks for coming guys" she said politely. I looked at Rouge and she nodded. I turned back to Jenn
"Hey Jenn, can I ask you something?" I started.
"Sure" Jenn replied.
"You know Knuckles down the hall?"
"Yes"
"Well he's a furry and you're a furry"
"Right"
"Are you two related?"
"What? James I'm surprised at you, I find that racist"
"Oh, well I'm sorry I was just asking"
"Well it's a touchy subject, no not all furries are related, what are you trying to say, huh? We all look the same to you? Huh, huh, huh?!?"
"No, not at all. I guess that was a little bit racist"
"I should say so, you should be much more careful when you're talking about race"
"Well look who's talking"
"What do you mean?"
"Well what about umm… I don't really know, but you're a little bit racist"
"Well you're a little bit too"
"I guess we're both a little bit racist"
"Admitting it is not an easy thing to do"
"But I guess it's true"
"Between me and you"
"Everyone's a little bit racist; sometimes" we sang at once "Doesn't mean we go around committing hate crimes, look around and you will find, no ones really color blind, maybe it's a fact we all should face. Everyone makes judgments, based on race.
"Now not big judgments" I reminded her.
"No" she replied.
"Just little judgments like thinking Mexican bus boys should learn to speak god damned English!"
"Right"
"Everyone's a little bit racist; today" we sang together "So everyone's a little bit racist, okay. Ethnic jokes may be a coot, but we laugh because they're based on truth. Don't take them as personal attacks; everyone enjoys them, so relax"
"Okay, stop me if you heard this one" I started
"Okay" she answered
"There's a plane going down, there's only one parachute and there's a rabbi, a priest-"
"And a black guy" we began to laugh as Mephiles got up
"What are you talking about Jenn?" he scolded
"Uh…"
"You were telling a black joke" he growled
"Well yes, but everyone tells black jokes" I explained
"I don't" he protested
"Well of course not – you're black, but I bet you tell Pollack jokes, right?" I asked.
"Well of course I do" he laughed "Those stupid Pollack's"
"Don't you think that's a little racist?" I asked him. He stopped laughing.
"Well damn, I guess you're right" he admitted.
"You're a little bit racist" Jenn sang
"Well you're a little bit too" he replied
"We're all a little bit racist" I finished
"I think I would have to agree with you"
"We're glad you do" Jenn and I replied in tune.
"It's sad but true" he started "Everyone's a little bit racist, alright"
"Alright" Jenn agreed
"Alright" I repeated
"Alright" Mephiles said again "Bigotry has never been exclusively white"
"If we all could just admit" Jenn and I joined in song "That we are racist a little bit, even though we all know that it's wrong. Maybe it would help us get along"
"Christ I feel good" I started out of song.
"Now there was a fine, outstanding black man" Mephiles interrupted.
"Who?" I asked
"Jesus Christ" he answered
"Uh Mephiles, Jesus was white" Jenn told him.
"No Jesus was black"
"No, Jesus was white"
"No I'm pretty sure Jesus was black"
"Guys, guys" I interrupted "Jesus was Jewish" I paused and then we all burst into laughter. We saw the blue beast from before crash into the ground and Shadow walked over
"Hey guys, what're you laughing about?" he asked
"Racism" Mephiles told him.
"Cool" Shadow answered. Knuckles came trotting in holding his throat with a bump on his head
"Hey Shadow, you come back and bring in the recycalabers" he stuttered
"What does that mean?" I asked.
"Umm… Recyclables" Shadow answered. We all burst into laughter "HEY! Don't laugh at him, how many languages do you speak?" he growled
"Oh come off it Shadow" Jenn told him "Everyone's a little bit racist"
"I'm not" he interrupted
"Oh no?" I asked
"Nope" he started "How many oriental boy friends, you got?"
"What? SHADOW!!" Knuckles boomed.
"Shadow buddy where you been? The term is Asian-American"
"I know you are no intending to be" Knuckles sang, his voice high pitched from his bump on the head "But calling me orienteer, offensive to me"
"I'm sorry honey" he begged to Knuckles "I love you"
"And I love you" he sighed holding his head
"But, you're racist too"
"I know" Knuckles began "the Jews have all the money and the whites have all the power and get stuck in taxi cab with Sonic, who no shower"
"Me too" I replied
"Me too" Jenn repeated
"I can't even get a taxi" Mephiles announced "'course, I always burn them up" he added.
"Everyone's a little bit racist; it's true" we all sang as one "But everyone's just about as racist as you. If we all could just admit, that we're all racist a little bit and everyone stopped being so PC, maybe we could all live in harmony" we finished.
"Everyone's a little bit laciest" Rouge joked at the end. We all burst out laughing as Mephiles looked around.
"Umm… you guys mind if I join you guys? Being a villain has gotten pretty old, I want to know what it's like to be a hero for once" we looked at each other and nodded in agreement. We met up with the others and explained everything and then returned to base.
Everyone was shocked at first, but quickly got used to it and soon the month and season came to a close.