Diary of the Fallen

She watched from the crevice she was concealed within as Draco and Harry crossed paths in the hallway.

"The two handsomest men to ever come into existence." she thought. It was only fitting that they were rivals; mortal enemies. They exchanged negative comments about one another and almost broke into a duel, but Professor Flitwick emerged from his classroom; stopping the action in it's tracks. He told them to scatter immediately.

A moment passed. She decided that since she was ditching class today, and there was no longer any entertainment, she'd update her diary. She didn't write in it often.

It struck her as incredibly unintelligent to confide all of your deepest darkest secrets to a book. A simple book that any peeping eyes could possibly see. And with her secrets; the risk just wasn't worth it.

It took her a moment to get into a position that she could write legibly in and manage not to spill her ink all over her clothes. But as soon as she was settled her quill flew across the paper at an alarming rate.

Dearest Darlingest Diary,

It's just about time for my monthly update. I really shouldn't say that. It sounds like I'm talking about my period or something else disgusting like that. Ick. Anyways, I've come to a conclusion.

I used to be so beautiful; guys were vying for every millisecond of my attention. I was so innocent… so young… so unscarred. Now my reputation is charred beyond all point of recovery.

Instead of being the innocent one, I'm the one they come to learn how to lose their innocence.

But of course none of what they hear is true. I could never live up to the expectation they've created for me. I can't even keep a steady boyfriend for goodness sake! They all seem so nice, so caring.

And then the end of the first day comes and they say to me, "Hey Pans, lets go to your room. I don't want those other guys getting jealous." They assume that I'm going to do that with them! As if! I've never actually done that! When they say that I freak out so they spread the rumor that I'm the best girl they've ever had. They never had me! They hardly even caught my eye! Well, some more than others, but still! I haven't ever really liked any of them!

You wanna know a secret? I've only ever really liked two guys. And it hasn't even been that little. I've fallen head-over-heels for them. Completely lost my mind over them.

The sworn enemies. And neither one can ever love me. Or find time in their busy days of playing Hero and Evil Villain to spare me a second glance.

I finally know what I am. I am the lost. I am the epitome of darkness. I am the fallen angel forbidden to ever return to light, to joy, to love.

No hope remains for me. There's no savior riding in with the horizon. And it's all because I am the fallen.

Love,

Pansy

Hey! Another chappie already! yay! I hope you guys like this one, however depressing that it is. Please review & tell me what you think. Until next entry, HazelEyedHottie