Please, please forgive me

But I won't be home again

I want to die, I want to die alone. I wanted to be alone and I am, forever. And all my girlish fantasies were always leaving me with this denial masked as hope.

Maybe someday you'll look up

And barely concious you'll say to no one

Isn't something missing?

I took off beause I couldn't take it anymore. Because I wanted so desperatly to see if anyone followed. And in my mind I saw you, the one I love, pacing nervously, trying to call me, and finally in a final attempt you went searching for me. I saw you searching for hours feeling frustrated and defeated, but fighting through the blinding snow to find me. Yes I invisioned you calling my name and shivering, but all the while you were ignoring the fact because you wanted so badly to find me ok.

You won't cry for my absence I know

You forgot me long ago

I wish that my fantasies were real, because my cell phone says you aren't calling although I know by now you know I'm gone. But it's almost like no one knows I'm gone. And I laugh bitterly because I realize I wasn't as important to you or anyone else that I thought needed me.

Am I that unimportant...

Am I so insignifacant...

I really thought you were different, I thought you weren't like that. And you are different in other ways but where it mattered most to me, you weren't. And I can't believe that I thought you would change just to be with me. Maybe I'm the bigger fool for ever thinking that somewhere in my twisted mind that I was more than just some girl who happened to be your friend.

Isn't something missing

Isn't someone missing me?

I'm not needed, I'm not. I truly thought that I was although I never really acted like it. I can't believe myself for thinking I was worth anything to anyone, especially you. I'm deciding that my fate is going to be a welcome surprise to all. 'Finally she'll be gone.'

Even though I'm the sacrifice

You won't try for me, not now

Ha, and to think I actually loved you, shallow you. You never gave a damn about me and I doubt you ever will. Sure maybe you'll wonder where I went but you'll probably wake up one day and question 'Who? I don't remember her.' Am I really that worthless? Sometimes I think it's true.

It really makes me laugh although it hurts more than anything else. It technically isn't possible to die of a broken heart, but I know I will. They'll call it hypotherma, when or if they find me.

Though I'd die to know you love me

I'm all alone

I hope when I'm dead that you cry, I hope you choke on every tear that may fall from your lying eyes. Those beautiful yes that I once fell in love with. I hope that you regret everything you ever said to me I hope everynight you live with the suffering of knowing you caused this. And I hope you know that I was doing this all because I wanted you to be true to not only yourself but to me.

Isn't someone missing me?

And I know as I lay here among the falling snow, that you will never know that my last thoughts were of you. I'm doing this for everything and for nothing.

And in a last vain attempt I cry out your name.

"Danny..."

Yay, this one was very fun for me to write. So basically I'm not sure if I should leave it or make at a twoshot, you decide. Also I didn't use all the lyrics to this Evanescence song.