ok, first off I would like to say that i am REALLY sorry that I haven't written ANYTHING in the last couple months... not even a quickie story to keep you all amused... that's totally my fault... sorry...

second, i'd love to say that there's a new chapter up and i think i've gotten over my writer's block!!!! WOOT!

atlantian - lol, at least i know that the galaxy is relatively safe in your hands! kolya's hands are ugly...
Whirlwind-2005 - everyone should double-croos themselves! it gets you quite tangled up, but you're insane all the same! LOL!
fififolle - i'm very glad you throughly enjoyed kolya! i tried to make him very up to par! i guess i succeeded! thanks!
Lisa - oooh! maybe there will be a story (eventually) where someone tries to take the Guides seriously enough to try them! thanks!
nwfairy - i like Atssie for the sea monster's name... maybe i will honor that name in a Guide! and yea, genii are kindy creepy...
Port-of-Seas - kolya IS entirely too energetic for his age and for someone who's been shot so many times! thanks for your time!
Reefgirl - kolya is like the Energizer Bunny... he just keeps coming and coming and coming... (mutters) megalomaniac...
Freckles-101 - ook! vala doing a guide will be quite amusing! that'll be in the Milky Way guides though... here's the next chapt! (finally)
Yarrharr - lol, calvinball... what's that? sounds pretty funny! glad you enjoyed kolya's chapter! he had fun making it too!
TangledPencils - i guess you're no fan of the genii then? oh well... i hope you enjoyed the chapter all the same!
nightpheonix - oh yes, the Atlantean Sea Monster occasionally likes to feast on bad reviewers... the genii are totally evil!
Knightgirl4Jack - thats ok about your comp... just give it a kick... anyway, i'm happy (and frightened slightly) by your worship of that chapt!
SilverRider - lol, yeah, kolya probably wants john's hide and head mounted on a wall somewhere in the multiverse... sick...
Delka - oh, important buttons are totally fun... if you're allowed to push them! sounds like an interesting job you have! important buttons!!!

woohoo! finished that! and i believe i have figured how where my reviewers have been disappearing to, actually i think atlantian found out why... in her words "...the giant atlantian Sea Monster got miffed that everyone was reviewing for you and paying no attention to him, so he gobbled up a few reviewers. I hid under a spiffy Atlantian Stargate, and was thus saved from finally seeing the inside of a stomach."

Go figure. The sea monster has always been awfully jealous...

but now...! (drum roll) THE NEW CHAPTER! (trumpets blare)

Daedalus had just landed on Earth and the first duty it had was to download all of its mission briefings and stuff like that.

It was all rather boring.

Caldwell and his first officer, Kleinman, scoured through the ship's archives to find what they actually wanted to send to the SGC and what they didn't want anyone to find ever.

OOO

General Landry stood 28 floors underground in the SGC. He was receiving the information from Daedalus. They had a lot of junk to sort through, he noticed quickly. The download was taking forever! Then again, Daedalus hadn't been on Earth for the last three or so months.

A voice brought Landry out of his reverie. "General?"

"Hmm?" he answered back.

Sergeant Walter Harriman continued, "Sir, the download from the Daedalus is complete. They are requesting the time of their debriefing."

Landry sighed in exasperation. Did people ever want to rest around here? He just wanted to get through a couple of the reports before he saw anyone.

"Tell them to go and take a break. I'll see them in three hours," the general ordered.

"Yes sir." Harriman went right away to informing the Daedalus of what time their meeting with Landry would be at.

"Thank you Walter," Landry said when the sergeant was done.

"No problem sir."

"If anyone needs me, I'll be in my office," Landry informed Walter as he took off.

"Yes sir!"

General Landry escaped to his office and logged into his computer. He scanned through the mission reports, trying to find the most interesting ones. They were given titles, boring and official ones, but Landry had learned to read past that. For instance if a title read: "Wraith at M9X-932" that usually meant a firefight ensued and someone had won or lost.

He left the boring ones alone until night. Landry fell asleep better when reading supply requests.

As the general searched through the muck to find something of interest, a gleaming beacon stood out. There was something in the mission reports that read as "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Pegasus Galaxy." This title caught his interest and his eyebrows went up in mild surprise. He opened the document.

A hand flew to his mouth to prevent the overwhelming urge to laugh from coming out. This was hilarious! He supposed Colonel Sheppard had written this when he was bored or something! Maybe the Atlanteans needed something more to do… perhaps a false wraith attack might wake them up… nah.

Landry read through all 19 Guides that had been written by Atlantis personnel, Atlantis, and Hermiod. Of them all, Atlantis' and Hermiod's amused the general the most.

Chuckles started coming very easy as Landry read farther into the madness. He wiped some tears from his eyes. God, Landry hadn't laughed like this in ages! It felt good!

"Sir?" came a quietly inquiring voice. All of SG-1 stood outside his office door, looking at him like he'd mutated into something with sixteen heads. Landry quickly composed himself.

"Yes SG-1?" he asked quickly, trying to cover up his lapse in professionalism.

"Ah, we'll come back later… It seems as if we interrupted something," Cameron said slowly. He and Sam shared a look and they left. Daniel stood in the door gazing at Landry curiously, as if he were studying a puzzling object. Landry stared right back. Before he could say anything however, Daniel shook his head and left.

Landry got back to the Guides.

He deftly popped open a Word document and began to write.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Milky Way Galaxy.

a perfect segway into the next story! oh by the way, this is by no means "the end" of the Pegasus Galaxy Guides... simply the end of the Tau'ri ones... all the ones from here on out are going to be Pegasus full-time inhabitants... the Guides of the SGC will continue in the next story "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Milky Way Galaxy"

don't ask me when i'll get around to writing that... but i hope you all enjoyed this chapter as much as you have prvious chapters!!!!! please review so i don't forget for another four freaking months!!!