This is a series of drabbles for all those crack lovers who thought Death Note needed to… well… Lighten up :D (note: I'm not good with humor, so tell me if I go to far to try to get a laugh from you all.)

And note: I do not own Death Note, though I wouldn't mind owning L… :D

Chapter 3: Lung Cancer?

"You know," Near said out loud to himself several years after Matt's, and Mello's, death, "I wonder why Matt never got cancer. Or maybe he did, and he just never told me… Either way, he died…"

Near decided to look up Matt's health records. Not because he cared, but because he was bored. He scrolled down and found the information from Matt's last visit to the hospital. "Has cancer." Near chuckled to himself.

"Maybe that's why he died," he thought. "Maybe he just died of cancer, right then and there." He chuckled to himself, imagining the scene…

Matt was cornered in his car, the Kira supporter motorcycles circling around him. As they gave the command to shoot, he lurched forward with pain from his lungs, making contact with the bullets. Damn, he thought as his life slipped away. I knew I should have gotten that cancer surgery. (I know nothing about lung cancer, so it might seem weird to people who do know something about it.)

Chapter Four: Watari

Yagami Soichiro had been, for lack of a better word, shocked when he found out that the mysterious, cloaked man who was L's contact for the ICPO was, in fact, a kindly old gentleman. Talk about weird.

The chief decided to confide into his son about this manner. "Watari's appearance at first was strange," he said. Light took this into consideration.

The teen did think the elderly man seemed strange at first, and told L about this opinion. "My father and I agree that Watari's a bit strange," he said.

This made absolutely no sense to poor L. L had thought Watari was interesting and nice, and completely average. But then again, L figured, I'm not so average myself. What if my definition of average is different from the Yagamis'?

The detective decided to talk about it with his partner. "Watari, Yagami-san and Yagami-kun seem to think you're weird."

The old man raised his eyebrows behind his glasses. "Is that so? I'll have to talk to them about it."

That night, L actually went to sleep. He woke up the next morning to find Light and Soichiro sprawled over two couches, covered in bruises. Watari was walking towards L with a puzzled look on his face. "Yagami-san says he only mentioned my appearance," the man said thoughtfully.

L chuckled to himself. Like a game of Telephone.

(By now, I'm running out of ideas. Earlier today, I had a million but they all died on me. Any help on topics to drabble about would be appreciated :D)