Chapter Forty-One: Clear As Mud

1120 Hours, March 3, 2552. Cooper Residence, St. Louis, MO. "The Return of Hope," Planet Earth. Day Sixteen of the Battle of Sigma Octanus IV

He stood in front of the door, wondering if he was truly ready to knock yet. He hadn't seen his son in several months, and that thought alone caused his throat to tighten. If he thought about the fact that his little boy's mother was dead, too…he simply couldn't stand it.

All right, Willis, he said to himself. Just do it. You should be happy; you're finally getting to see Gabriel. You've been waiting ages for this moment, and now you're hesitating?

Hawk knew why he was suddenly conflicted. After all, everything had changed. He wanted desperately to see his son, but now he found that he was afraid of the emotions he would feel once he was face-to-face with his child. The child I had with the woman I love, who's dead, he thought in anguish.

In a quick and almost mechanical motion, Willis rang the doorbell. It was as if his body knew his brain was in too much of an upheaval to make a decision, and so it took over instead. As he waited for an answer, however, he found himself growing more and more excited; he couldn't wait to see little Gabe.

Finally, the door opened.

"William! What a surprise," Natalie's mother said.

"How's it going, Mrs. Cooper?" Willis asked, his voice flat despite his effort to project enthusiasm.

"I'm doing well, thank you." She smiled. "I bet you came to see Gabriel, didn't you?"

Willis couldn't help but give her a small grin. "Yes, ma'am."

Her smile widened. "Well, come on in. He'll be happy to see you."

The young officer walked into his mother-in-law's home as she stepped out of the way. He looked around, trying to spot his son, wondering what he would say---

And suddenly, there he was.

Willis and Natalie's little toddler was sitting on the floor of the living room, playing casually with his toys. The fact that the boy could be so carefree when he had just lost one of his parents tore at Willis.

Having heard the doorbell and knowing a guest had walked into the door, Gabriel looked up. He immediately grinned when he saw that the newcomer was actually his father.

"Daddy!" the little boy cried, jumping to his feet and knocking over his toys in the process. Willis couldn't help but grin back at his son as he crouched and extended his hands. Gabriel ran straight into his father's waiting arms and was promptly enveloped in a fierce hug.

Willis cradled his son for a long time, rubbing his back and kissing his hair. Gabriel giggled and smiled, but Willis was fighting to keep his tears at bay. He still had to deliver the awful news to his happy little boy.

"Hi, Gabe," Willis said. "I've missed you a lot, kiddo."

"Miss you, Daddy," the boy replied. Stepping back from his father, Gabriel looked up and grinned.

Hawk had always been struck by how much his son took after him. Gabe was like a miniature version of himself, complete with the light brown hair and everything. But right now, all Willis could focus on were his son's shining green eyes.

Natalie's green eyes.

He quickly wrapped his little boy in another hug. "I love you, Gabe."

"Love you, Daddy."

"Ok, kiddo. Why don't you play with those toys for a bit while I talk to Grandma real quick?" Willis asked, knowing it was best to get this over with.

When he saw his son nod vigorously, Willis walked towards the kitchen where Natalie's mother was standing.

"Are you hungry, Willis?" she inquired as he entered the room.

"Oh, no, thanks, Mrs. Cooper," he replied. He hadn't had much of an appetite in recent weeks.

Noticing his grave expression, Natalie's mother sat down on the kitchen table and motioned for Willis to do the same. When they were both seated, she was the first to speak.

"I heard about what's happening on Sigma Octanus Four," she said, shaking her head. "I'm just grateful that my children aren't anywhere near that place. After I lost Jenna, my oldest, I couldn't possibly go through that again." She glanced at Willis and found him gaping at her in surprise. "Did you lose someone there you knew?"

"Natalie…" Willis croaked. "Mrs. Cooper, Natalie was there."

"I thought she was on Heath." The woman put a hand to her chest as a terrified look came upon her face. "And what do you mean she was on Sigma Octanus?"

"The Covenant glassed the planet."

"You've obviously been misinformed," the woman said, calming down a bit. "That was the media's initial report, when they had no real idea what was going on. The planet hasn't been glassed, Willis. Most of it, yes, but not all of it."

"Where? I mean, which part was left untouched?" Willis asked, hoping against hope that she'd say Cote D'Azur.

The expression on his mother-in-law's face became somber once more. "That's the problem, Willis. No one knows the answer to that, except for the forces on the ground. And they've been out of contact since the start of the invasion over two weeks ago."

"So…Natalie might still be alive?" That would explain why I haven't received an official notification that she was killed in action, he thought.

"Willis, I'm sure I don't have to remind just how big even a small planet can be. The Covenant have spared one small area, and that's all we know for sure."

Willis wasn't sure what to believe at this point. At first, he'd had hope when his mother-in-law said some part of the planet had been spared, but she was right. The chances of Natalie being on that one portion of the planet were slim. Still, he had to hang on to some hope---any hope.

"Why would the Covenant do that? Just save a single area and lay waste to the rest?" Willis asked, his brain trying to make sense of the confusing and emotional situation.

"I wish I knew the answer to that." She reached across the table and grasped her son-in-law's hand as her eyes grew watery. "All we can do is pray, Willis. We have to pray that she's still alive, somewhere on that ruined planet."