Disclaimer: See Chapter 1

Can't Fight the Moonlight

Chapter 3: It'll Steal Your Heart Tonight

Underneath the starlight, starlight

There's a magical feeling so right

It'll steal your heart tonight

Previously on Can't Fight the Moonlight...

Before the doors open, Alex gathers up the courage to ask Derek about Addison. "Hey. You were married to Addison for eleven years. So, you know her pretty well, right?"

Derek laughs and steps into the elevator. "I guess you could say that. Why?"

As others enter the elevator, Alex continues to speak. "Well, has she ever had any problems? Like psychological?" He whispers the next part, so only Derek can hear. "Like with...hurting herself?"

Derek's hand stops the elevator doors before they close.

As Derek exited the elevator, he pulled on Alex's arm and pushed him into one of the chairs in the lobby. Then, he sat straight across from Alex. "What do you mean, hurting herself?"

Alex shifts uncomfortably in his chair. This was going to be a very awkward conversation. Alex had trouble talking about any personal problems, much less that of his girlfriend. Especially discussing them with her ex-husband. "I think it's pretty clear what I mean." He couldn't just straight out say "Your ex-wife is cutting herself." It requires too much courage on his part.

Derek seemed extremely troubled by Alex's words. Alex didn't expect Derek to be this, well, concerned. Even after eleven years of marriage, Alex had never seen Derek look at Addison very closely, except out of jealousy.

Derek ran his fingers over his chin, picking at the stubble that had formed over the weekend. "How long?"

Alex did not want to have this conversation. His legs were itching to run away. No, this is about Addison"How long since I noticed?"

Derek nods and leans forward placing his elbows on his knees. He's ready to analyze every single word that comes out of Alex's mouth. Alex rambles on, but he doesn't know why. He just really wants to get out of there, but he doesn't want to talk to Derek at all. "I don't know...the first time, I suppose was around...I guess, maybe...the time of the wedding."

As Alex talks, Derek taps his hand on the armrest of the chair. Jesus. How long does it take this guy to spit out a simple sentence? This is Addison we're talking about. "That was only a couple of days ago. Maybe something happened recently. How bad was it?"

Now it's too much for Alex. He has to get out of there. If he gave Derek any more information, Addison would never trust him again with her personal business. "She'll be fine. It's okay. I really have to get. I have rounds." Alex stands up to leave, but Derek blocks his way.

"I know it's hard, but you have to tell me what's going on. We can help her, that's what you want, right?" Derek takes a deep breath. "She won't be fine. I know she cuts."

This angers Alex. SHE TOLD HIM? Why does she feel like she has to keep it a secret from me? And why has nothing been done?? "She told you?!"

Derek scolds himself. That was a stupid thing to say. You have to convince Alex that you're not the enemy. "No. She told Meredith and Meredith told me. They've formed some sort of connection...but anyway, you shouldn't be concerned about that."

Alex was losing it. All this stuff with Addison was stressing him out. Luckily, work has been pretty breezy for Alex. He hasn't killed someone for almost a week.

But, right now, he reached up into his hair, trying to soothe himself, which was proving to be impossible with Derek Shepherd standing there trying to be the hero and solve all of the problems. "Then, what should I be concerned about? You seem to have all the answers, so just tell me!"

Derek has never seen Alex unglued like this. He pushes Alex back down into the chair. Surprisingly, Alex obliges and calms down. Derek sits in the chair beside him to whisper. They don't need an audience for this conversation. "You said that she'll be fine. Do you really know that? The cuts aren't deep now, but they will be."

Alex just wants to clasp his hands over his ears so he doesn't have to hear more of Shepherd's psychological theory about Addison. "Stop it." he hisses through his teeth.

Derek tilts his head, in his McDreamy way. This doesn't usually work on men, but I can always try. "She needs you, Alex. Just talk to her about it. Maybe you can get her some help."

"No!" Alex was about to start yelling. He reminded himself: Shepherd's your superior. You can't do this. "I've gained her trust and I'm not about to throw it all away, just because of a stupid assumption. She'll be FINE." He gets up to leave again, but Derek raises an arm to stop him. "Alex. I need you to understand. I made the same mistake."

Alex pushes him away. "What the hell are you talking about, man?" Does he think I'm stupid? I've been a better boyfriend in these past few months than he was in the decades they were together.

Derek rises, but doesn't make any advances on Alex. "You think that it will be okay. You think that you can help her by holding her and telling her that you love her. It's not enough. You're not enough. She needs professional help."

Alex shook his head. "I'm not you, Dr. Shepherd. I won't ignore her when she needs me. We'll get through this together. Don't worry about it. And I would appreciate it if you minded your own business." With that last statement, Alex left.

Derek's mouth hung open. He couldn't believe Alex Karev had mouthed off to him like that. It was the last thing that he expected. Maybe Alex was right. He blindly dismissed Addison's problem when they were married.

He had to make it up to her. He needed to see her.

Later that night...

Mark Sloan has never been this nervous for a date.

Sitting in "Ocean World", he's actually wearing the blue sweater that Addison recommended, but he is feeling regretful because now he's sweating like a pig.

But he's not just nervous.

He's terror-stricken.

Mark HATES fish.

The moment that Derek mentioned the word "sushi", Mark almost threw up in his mouth. But he really wanted a shot with Izzie, so he would shove any raw fish down his throat without tasting or chewing.

Still, Mark shudders. All around the place, fish tanks stand with colorful piranhas, adding to the ambience of the restaurant. Eels and octopuses hang from the ceiling and it's really creeping Mark out. He taps his fork apprehensively against his plate.

Then, he sees her.

And she's so damn attractive that he would bite off an octopus leg just to be with her. He stands up as she approaches him and offers her a chair. "Hi. You look...amazing."

What a gentleman. "Thanks." They sit at the same time and she scoots to the table. "How are you?"

Mark grins. "Incredible. You?"

She laughs. "Good. But starving. Have you ordered yet?"

She's talking about food already? Crap. "No. I was just about to, though. You have perfect timing." He motions to the waitress.

Okay, now he's just sucking up. Izzie rolls her eyes as Mark scans the menu for something that's served with a proper cooking time. "Ahh...I think I'll have the teriyaki chicken."

Izzie takes the menu from him. "No. You can't order chicken when we're in the most amazing sushi restaurant in the city." She turns to the waiter. "We'll split an order of Unagi, California Rolls, and Salmon." The waiter makes a few small notes and leaves.

Mark gulps. Unagi does not sound like some sort of steak. "Are those all raw?"

Izzie nods and giggles at his expression. "Haven't you had sushi before? Don't worry, you'll love it."

Mark looks doubtful and takes a long swig of his drink. Why is it so hot in here? He adjusts his collar and returns his focus to Izzie. "You did really well on the Barnum surgery today. I'm really proud of you."

Izzie blushes. "Thanks." Ever since Denny, she loves getting compliments on her work.

Seeing that she was enjoying the attention, Mark continues. "Seriously. He really liked you and his recovery time will probably speed up because of it. We make a great team." Look, she's smiling. Note to self: Praise her ability to work with others.

Izzie wanted to talk about the surgery. "But in the OR, I did well there too, right?"

Mark brushed off the hint. "Of course, but you're really good at the interpersonal stuff. We'll be the new Cristina and Burke. Except without the deception. I'll deal with all the hard stuff and you can do what you do best. You know, make people feel better about themselves. We need a lot more of that in plastic surgery."

"Excuse me?" Izzie did not like what he was implying. "I want to be a surgeon." And I certainly do NOT want to be the new Cristina and Burke.

Mark was so caught up in his little fantasy that he didn't even notice the change in Izzie's tone. "You will be. We'll work together, maybe even start a practice. I'll do the surgeries and you can talk to the patients."" Crap. I don't want her coming on to another patient. I'd better backtrack and make a joke or something. "But don't get too close to the patients. We don't want another lawsuit on our hands." He started laughing, but stopped abruptly when he saw the look on Izzie's face.

"Another LAWSUIT?!" Izzie screeched. "That's what you think I am?" This is so humiliating and insulting! I didn't even cause a lawsuit!!

"No, Izzie. I didn't mean it like that-"

"Just shut up, Mark!" Izzie stood up and her chair fell to the ground. On cue, the waiter brought their food. "I will NEVER even CONSIDER sleeping with you, or even dating you, for that matter again!" She grabbed the eel and slammed it in his face. "And guess what? This was a test and you FAILED! Derek told me that you HATE sushi ahead of time! Earlier, I was thinking that since you came anyway you really might care about me. I guess I was wrong."

She storms off, leaving Mark picking fish off his face. He sits at the table staring at all the food. He asks the waiter to bring him the bill.

At this very moment, Mark decides that he doesn't hate fish.

He DESPISES them with all the rage in every single cell in his body.

Earlier, in the NICU:

After his emotional conversation with Alex, Derek decided to make things right. He wanted to talk to Addison, to see the scars on her wrists, and to do something about it. He spotted her and she looked perfectly normal. She didn't seem depressed or sad in any way. Smiling at a baby in a crib, she let it play with her finger. Fortunately for Derek, she was alone in the nursery. He stood there, watching her for a while.

Addison stroked the baby's stomach, watching the lungs rise and collapse. It was relaxing. She could almost forget for a second, but then the memory was back. She closed her eyes, tears threatening to fall.

Derek decided that this would be a good time to move. She seemed fine for a moment, but in a flash her emotions could change. "Addison." he whispered softly, as not to scare her.

Addison knew immediately what he was up to. Derek would never come to see her unless Alex told him something that would cause Derek to worry. He had seventeen years to worry. His time is up. "Yeah, Derek?" She wipes her eyes.

He walks toward her slowly, cautious of the state she was currently in. "Why are you crying?"

She shook her head. "It's nothing."

Derek tried to lighten the mood. "Come on. You know you can't hide from me."

She still refused to talk and felt a lump rising in her throat. She looked to the baby for comfort. Her breathing relaxed as the baby gurgled.

Derek's eyes wondered into the crib as he put a hand on her shoulder and moved closer. "It's okay. You may fool Alex but you can't fool me." Her right hand was still on the baby's stomach and he placed his palm over her knuckles and lifted her hand of the crib. He moved slowly until her sleeve was in reach. Quickly, he pulled it back and grasped her hand tightly, unwilling to let go.

She cried out, but he was surprised at what he saw. He was expecting cuts, but only a series of dark bruises appeared. He wrestled with her slightly until the other arm was revealed. The left arm displayed more bruises, but also what Derek was looking for. "Did you hit yourself too? Did you cause the bruises?"

Addison's shoulders were shaking and she gagged on her sobs. A nurse was bound to come in at any second. She could NOT be seen like this. "Derek." she whines.

He has hold of both of her hands and he won't let go. " Addison, tell me."

Her head lowers and her hair covers her eyes. She knows that mascara must be unattractively dripping down her face. "Derek. You have to believe me. I didn't- It wasn't me who- did this."

He patiently waited for her to continue. She just needs to let it out.

"Derek. Something horrible happened to me."

And just as she was about to tell him, the door clicked open.

That was fun. Sorry about the lack of McStizzie. I just really wanted to write more of Addison.

Meredith might come into play sometime soon. Because there just has to be Mer/Der. Or else this story would be Addek. Which it's not.

I'm sorry because I really can't do the whole rape situation justice. I can't describe in words how terrible it must be because it's never happened to me. But I've really tried to read up on it, so I can get the most accurate portrayal possible.

But, hopefully, I've hit the self-harming stuff on target.

Next chapter is huge. Personally, I'm very excited. But it might take a while to get up because I'm going to wait until I'm ready to write it. Which means EXTREMELY emotionally charged. It's going to take a lot of brain power/ frustration for the words to fit just how I want.

But, since my other A/N's have been kind of low on word count, I will clue you into my thinking process just a little. I've changed the character's a bit. Sorry to ruin the essence of Grey's Anatomy, but I needed a break from the characters on the show. Derek is a dream that I made up. He CARES and it's very nice.

Don't get me wrong, Alex cares too, but he's not really in touch with what's really going on. He's in denial and a little bit of a control freak. He thinks that he can fix everything, but he CAN'T. He's realistic though. How do I know this? I've seen it. Derek is not realistic. I don't even think Derek exists. Maybe I just haven't found someone like him yet. Addison is a bunch of thoughts pulled together in my head. I don't know if she's real or not. I'll figure it out before I end this story. Don't worry I've still got like ten chapters.

And I'm shooting for ten reviews per chapter. Make it happen! Please and thank you. Hopefully, I've made a difference in SOMEONE's life, other than my own. Because feedback changes my life.

What was I talking about?

I am so not going to do well on my math test tomorrow. My head is FULL.