Special thanks to sweetnarcosis!!

Disclaimer: See chapter 1

Can't Fight the Moonlight

Chapter 6: "I'll Be There For You"

Previously on Can't Fight the Moonlight

Derek hears more whispering and waves his hands to command their attention. "Sorry to take your time, but I felt it was necessary. Just remember to be careful. If you'd like to see Addison, page me. I'm not sure she's going to want to see everyone at once. And I shouldn't have to say this, but keep it quiet. All of you. Please. Do it for Addison."

Derek turns to Miranda and Callie. "Addison needs a pelvic exam. Alex and I agreed that it would be better if one of her female friends performed it instead of us. I'm sure we can find someone, but I was going to ask you two first-"

Miranda steps up. "I'll do it. I owe it to her. She saved my son's life. And I've examined her before, for the poison oak, so she should feel more comfortable."

Callie nods. "That's okay with me. I just want to see her."

So no one told you life was gonna be this way

"Hold on, Addison. I'm almost done. I promise." Miranda Bailey's voice cracks as she slowly reaches under Addison's hospital gown for the last time. "Just one more swab."

Addison's whole body clenches. Her teeth grind together and her hands grasp the two things nearest to her: the bed sheets and Alex. She hates this. They shouldn't have found out. How did I get here? When did I stop pretending? Or, the better question is, when did they stop believing my lies? Her eyelids press together. Don't cry. Don't cry. Please don't cry! Damn it. Tears slide down her face and off her chin. She can't stop trembling inside, but her body remains still. It's not supposed to be this hard. I'm an OB, for God's sake. I've given hundreds of pelvic exams. This shouldn't be different. Alex sits beside her, whispering encouraging words in her ear, but she doesn't hear him. Why am I so embarrassed?

Derek stands beside Addison, on the opposite side of the bed as from Alex. She seems pretty calm, except for the tears. She's getting better. She has to be feeling better.

Much to Addison's relief, Miranda removes latex gloved-hands from under her hospital gown. "All done."

Addison immediately brings her feet down from the stirrups and scoots comfortably on the bed. Miranda stands up from the stool she's been sitting on and motions Derek over to her. They stand by the door, trying to seem as cheerful as possible. Miranda stands on her toes to whisper to Derek. "There are vaginal bruises and tears consistent with rape. It's too bad that she showered. The swabs won't do her any good." She pauses. "You should take pictures of her injuries. I'll run the blood tests." She pats Derek on the shoulder and smiles at Addison and Alex before she exits.

Derek approaches the couple hesitantly. Is she going to let me take pictures? Probably not. Alex looks up at him. "I don't think we should do anymore today."

Addison nods. "Can I see Callie now?"

Derek fiddles with her chart in his hands. "I need to photograph your injuries. Then, we're all done with the medical part, okay?"

Addison rubs her head into the pillow. "No. Please. You can't." She protectively covers her arms with the hospital blanket. "Everyone will know," she murmurs.

Alex isn't quite sure what to do, for the millionth time today. He doesn't want to get on her bad side, but he hates that Derek has taken all of the responsibility in her well-being. So he stays silent, massaging her knee and resting his head beside hers.

Derek sets the chart down on the table in front of her bed and pinches the bridge of his nose. "Addie..."

"I know, Derek. I know it's important, but it's me. Can't you just make a little exception?" Addison sneaks her hand out of the covers to hold Alex's hand. He kisses her on the forehead and sits up in his chair.

Derek sits on the foot of the bed. "I won't take pictures of anything you don't feel comfortable with."

Addison crosses her arms and looks away. I just want to get out of here, just for all of this to be over.

Addison's feet stick out underneath the sheets and Derek places his hands on them. "It's procedure, Addison. We have to give the police something." Derek presses his thumbs into the arches of her feet. After years of foot massages, he still knows what she likes. She watches Derek rub her feet before sighing. "Okay."

"Okay." Derek hops off of the bed. Always prepared, Miranda had brought in a hospital camera earlier. He grabs it off of the table. "I'll only take a few."

Addison stares at the ceiling as Alex pulls on her arms to limply sit her up. He places his hand flat on her back, to make sure she doesn't fall back. "Don't worry. I'm right here."

Alex helps Derek roll back the covers of her bed. He can't really move though because she's still firmly holding his hand. "I love you, Addie."

Addison's eyes slowly trail down the walls and over to meet his. "I love you too," she says softly.

Derek takes a deep breath and moves up her hospital gown until the first of her injuries appear. He doesn't realize it, but he holds his breath the entire time. He moves very slowly until he spots the first bruises, on her lower thigh. Then, he decides that it would be best just to get this over quickly.

Addison awkwardly twists the bed sheets over her head, not wanting to face reality. Alex stares at the red hair sticking out of the covers. He refuses to look at the scars the rapist left on her body. He inches down the blanket on Addison's face, pulling it down to her chin. He kisses her on the mouth and she tastes like rain and tears. He doesn't release her lips until the first flash goes off. He feels her body shake and lets her press her fingernails into his biceps.

Derek moves the gown up once more, revealing more bruises. Three jagged red lines also appear on her skin. Derek wavers for just a moment, but his delay causes Addison to peek from her blanket. "Oh," she says quietly.

Derek swallows. The cuts are unexpected, but somehow, they don't surprise him. "It's okay. I'll just...try to avoid them. I guess."

Alex's gaze doesn't leave Addison's face. He's in a daze, outlining the contours of her cheekbones and jaw with his eyes.

Derek manages to take five pictures of Addison without a single scar revealed. Well done, he thinks. "Okay. That's enough."

Addison kicks her gown back and holds tightly onto Alex. Derek gives them a few minutes to be together, before he says, "The police will be ready to talk to you soon."

"Nooo." Addison groans. She rolls on the bed, pulling her sheets along with her which unveils an eyeful of long legs to Alex and Derek. Alex reaches to untwist her from the fabric, wanting to cover her up, though he knows Derek doesn't think of her like that anymore, especially now, in this situation.

Standing up from the chair, he unintentionally puts a distance between them. When he was sitting in the chair, his face touching hers, it was AlexandAddison. They blended together. Now, standing away from her, it is Addison. And then Alex. Separate people. He doesn't know what she's thinking, or what she's about to do. It bothers him, but he stands there, waiting for someone else to do something or say something.

Alex envies Derek's ability to remain calm in such an emotional situation. Every move that Derek makes accomplishes something. Like now, Derek leans over to Addison, because he knows this is going to take some persuasion. "This is the last thing you have to do. I absolutely promise."

"But it's the hardest thing." Addison whimpers. What if they see my arms? What if they ask about them? Do I lie?

"That's why it's the last thing." Derek explains, though he knows this isn't necessarily true. "We can get you a female, if you want. No one has to hear. Alex and I will leave, if it makes you feel better."

"No!" She's so scared again and it's exhausting. "You don't have to stay," She looks at Alex and offers her hand to him. "But I want Alex here. I can't do it without you, Alex."

His hand fits into hers and he lowers himself down to her. One arm wraps tightly around her back and the other continues to clutch her hand against the sheets. "I won't leave unless you ask. I'll be here for you the entire time, Addie." He breathes in through his nose, catching every scent of her.

After a while, he picks himself up off the bed and settles into the chair, back where he belongs.

Derek grabs her chart with an intent to leave, but then, Miranda opens the door again. Derek nods at her in affirmation that he got his job done. Miranda takes the chart away from him and scribbles a few notes. "I have good news, Addison." She looks up from the chart and shoves it back against Derek's chest. "You don't have any STDs." She places her hands on the railing at the end of Addison's bed and smiles. "And you're not pregnant."

Addison lets out a breath of relief. "Thank God," she whispers. "Not that I expected him to, but he didn't use a condom or anything." Did I just talk about it? Willingly? That's weird.

Alex tries not to frown, but it's difficult for him. He doesn't want to hear any more about this man abusing her in that way. How am I going to tune out when she reports to the police? I might just have to stomach it and then go punch a wall. Be strong for Addison. "Thanks, Dr. Bailey." he says.

Miranda nods and purses her lips together before saying, "Addison, I am so sorry."

Addison sighs. She had better get used to this; everyone pitying her. But she knew Miranda meant well. "It's okay, Miranda. It's not your fault." I'll be saying that a lot in the next few days.

"I know," Miranda continues, "but I'm sorry it happened."

Much better, Addison thought. "I don't want to keep you from work. God knows this hospital would fall down if you weren't here."

Bailey manages to crack a little smile before turning the door knob. "The hospital wouldn't fall down without me. But the interns without me? THAT would tear down the hospital." And with that last comment, she leaves.

I'll be there for you...
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you...
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too.

About a half-hour later, Derek ushers a small woman in her mid-forties, wearing jeans and fitted blouse, into the room. "Addison, this is Officer Barrett."

"Ashley." she corrects him. "Hi." Her blonde hair hangs down past her shoulders and she seems normal, except for the six-pack barely hidden by her white shirt. Her strength becomes more apparent with every move.

"Umm..." Addison mumbles, "Sorry. I didn't expect you to..."

"Look like this?" Ashley finishes. "The goal is to make you as comfortable as possible."

Addison eyes Alex and he shrugs. She turns back to Ashley and smiles weakly. "Okay."

"Great." Ashley grabs a chair and sits next to Addison's bedside, on the other side of Alex. She clasps her hands together and looks around. "Are we going to have this audience the whole time?"

"No," Derek replies. "We were just leaving." He's not hurt by the exclusion. Addison needs her privacy sometimes. And this is one of those times.

After Derek leaves, Ashley turns back to Addison. "Sorry. I didn't mean to kick them out."

Addison looks down at her sheets again and begins to play with the hem. "It's okay."

Alex places his hand on Addison's knee, uncertain. I hope this doesn't upset her too much. I have to set a limit to the questioning. It won't last longer than forty-five minutes; I won't let it.

Ashley takes out a tape recorder and sets it on Addison's beside table. She doesn't say a word until she presses a button and the tape starts recording. Addison half-listens to all of the official stuff and then answers basic questions that announce who she is. Alex also gives his name and relationship to Addison. Then, Ashley asks Addison to state that she knows her interview is being tape recorded and that it will be used as evidence. Addison stumbles on the last statement because she's not ready for her identity to be revealed. She knows this had to happen sometime, but why so soon? She can see it in the near future and it scares her to think about. Before she can think about it too much, Ashley speaks again.

"Addison. I'm going to need you to describe what happened March 1, 2007, beginning to end, with as much detail as you can give me. Okay?"

Addison runs her fingers through her hair and sighs. "Yeah."

Alex shifts in his seat and prepares himself. An unsettling feeling rests in his stomach, but he tries to ignore it.

Addison searches for words, for some sort of place to start. "I- I don't know. Um."

Ashley nods. "How about you start with where it happened."

Okay. I can do that. "Last night. I was taking a walk...around three o'clock." Addison winces, waiting for criticism, but Ashley sits there, listening intently.

"I know it was stupid, but I needed to...think. And he came up behind me." Addison blinks back tears, remembering his dirty hands closing over her mouth. "He was disgusting and he pulled me to the ground, on my back."

Alex fidgets some more, crossing his legs and uncrossing them. It's impossible for him to sit in a comfortable position. Just don't think about it. Don't picture it. Concentrate on Addison. He presses his lips to her arm, leaving a wet mark that he rubs away with his nose.

Addison reaches into her hair, pulling the long strands straight. "He climbed on top of me," She anxiously tugs at her hair. "And I could see him. Brown eyes. Long brown hair. I mean, it wasn't long enough to cover his eyes, but it wasn't short. He was tall and heavy. I felt like I was suffocating."

Addison swallows and brings her hands back down to clasp them in her lap. "And then he, uh, took off the robe that I was wearing."

Alex clears his throat, starting to lose control. He doesn't even try to hide the tears falling from his eyes. I can't believe that I wasn't there to protect her.

Ashley looks at both of them with a sympathetic smile. She's used to this, the boyfriend/husband crying more than he has ever in his entire life. She doesn't want him to feel uncomfortable, so she gives him a reassuring nod and then continues to interrogate Addison. "Did he say anything to you?

Addison wipes Alex's tears off his face with the back of her hand. "He kept telling me to shut up. I know he muttered a lot of really awful things, you know, during." Addison's fingernails dig into her hands, turning the skin white. "I don't really remember what he said. I tried to block it out, block everything out. I'm sorry."

Ashley notices that Addison's about to crumble and she flips off the tape recorder. "I'm not supposed to have anyone but Addison and me talking on the tape. So, if you need time to get stuff under control…"

Alex nods and wraps his arms around Addison, as tightly as possible. He won't ever let go of her again. He'll make sure another man never violates her again. Actually, I'm not sure if I want another man even touching her. I'm the only one who's allowed to be with her, make love to her. Even though what that man did was NOT making love. She has to know that I'll never hurt her like that. "Addie, I love you," he repeats over and over again.

Addison brushes her fingers over his cheek and then refocuses on Ashley. Ashley turns the tape recorder back on and Addison continues. "He left after he finished twice. I think I blacked out after the second time. And then Alex found me."

Ashley adjusts the pen tucked behind her ear and looks at Alex. "And then, I'm assuming, you brought her here." She gestures to the room in front of them.

Alex grimaces. How am I going to explain this without telling her everything? "I brought her here this morning. It was dark out last night. I couldn't really see anything. She just wanted to take a shower and she's been kind of...down lately, so I let her. It seemed weird and I thought something was off but she's been kind of down lately and I didn't want to push her." Seeing the confusion in Ashley's eyes, he continues. "I know, I know. I should have been more aware and now I'm paying for it. Last night is just a big blur."

Surprised, Addison looks at him. He noticed? I didn't think that he was even paying attention. She hugs him tighter. He wasn't oblivious and he's not like Derek. She feels guilty for even comparing the two.

Alex is thankful when Ashley tilts her head and smiles. "I understand." She pauses and speaks to Addison. "Is there anything else you can tell me that would identify your attacker?"

Addison shakes her head. "He has a very sharp nose. And he was wearing jeans and a dark colored t-shirt. Navy, or brown, maybe."

Ashley shuts off the tape recorder. "Thank you so much, Addison and Alex. We really appreciate this, it doesn't happen nearly enough. And now the hardest part is over and you can go home." As Ashley stands up with a reassuring smile, Alex's phone rings again.

He smiles at Addison. "It's probably more people calling to make sure you're okay. When will it ever stop?" He smirks and makes her giggle, a refreshing sound to the both of them.

Addison waves Ashley goodbye before eavesdropping on Alex's phone conversation.

He clears his throat. "Uhh...yeah. I'll tell her...But why?" Alex is quiet for about a minute. "Well, she's not going to like that." Addison frowns, but Alex keeps listening. "Why do I have to?" He pauses. "Fine. Okay. See you later." He shuts the phone. "Well, that was Derek."

"And..." Addison moves her hands in a circular motion, indicating to Alex that he should continue.

Alex scratches his head. "We're going to stay the night tonight."

Addison's face falls. "Why?"

Alex takes a deep breath and speaks softly. "Because the hospital psychologist thinks that it would be a good idea."

"He told?!" Addison's scrunches the muscles in her face, but no matter hard she tries, she can't cry anymore. All of her tears are gone and it's very unsettling.

Alex curses Derek Shepherd under his breath. Addison was just starting to get better and he made her all upset again. He stands up and fills her a glass of water from the sink and then hands it to her. "I know. But, don't worry, I'll be here the entire time. I won't leave your side, okay?"

"No, Alex." Addison shakes her head and takes a sip from her water. "You have to work."

She's just saying that to be a good person. Alex almost laughs. "No. It's okay. I want to do this. For me."

"Okay." Addison whimpers as she sets her water back down on the table. She pulls him toward her until he's lying on the bed next to her. She snuggles into him. "I feel better now."

He places his hands on her back. "Good. Keep it up." He kisses her hair and whispers. "That's all I want." He tilts her head upward. "Do you want anything?"

She pushes his hands off of her and looks him straight in the eye. He looks scared for a moment, but then the corners of her lips turn into a tiny smile. "I really really want to get out of this hospital gown."

Someone to face the day with.
Make it through all the mess with.
Someone I'll always laugh with.
Even at my worst, I'm best with you.

Callie stares at the door of Addison's hospital room. The blonde police woman left over an hour ago. Callie plans to enter the room sometime soon, but the reality hits her now as she stands outside. The horror smacks her in the face. Addison won't want to see me, she convinces herself. But Callie can't move from her position near the door. Just go in.

Then, Alex opens the door, making Callie jump out of her skin and thoughts. She sees Addison's figure in her peripheral vision, but she can't turn her head to look at Addison. She sneaks a peek at Addison. Oh. Callie can breathe again. Addison's face isn't scarred at all. In fact, she looks ten years younger, yet somehow a lot more tired. But she's still the same person. Addison waves and Callie feels much better.

Then, Callie turns to Alex and almost jumps again. Unlike Addison, Alex seems a lot older, but also more tired too. He smiles at her shocked reaction and she can see little wrinkles beginning to form around his eyes. "What?" he asks, "Do I really look that bad?"

Callie laughs nervously. "Yes." She fumbles with a couple of dollar bills out of the pocket of her white coat. "Here. Get some coffee. Maybe take a nap. I'll take care of her." She holds the dollars to him.

Alex glances back at Addison who waves him on. "Are you sure?" He rubs his chin. "I mean, I could stay."

"No." Callie states in her Don't-you-dare-mess-with-me tone "Go. Rest. Now."

Alex reluctantly leaves, shooting Addison a longing gaze. Callie rolls her eyes and Addison laughs. Callie takes very small steps over to Addison's bed. Addison scoots her feet over so Callie can sit down on the bed. Callie sits on the very edge of the bed, taking almost no room. "So..." Callie starts.

"Callie," Addison says, "I'm not going to infect you. You don't have to be afraid."

At that, Callie bursts into tears. "I'm so sorry, Addison. I should have-"

"Nothing." Addison finishes for her. "You shouldn't have done anything."

Callie buries her face in her hands. "But-"I should have noticed something seriously wrong.

"No buts." Addison places her hand on Callie's back. "It's okay," She says softly, "It's not your fault." Callie just gets more upset and Addison sniffles a little. "Please don't look at me like that. I'm not sick or diseased. I could really use something normal right now"

Callie nods and begins to pull herself together. "Okay. I can do that." She sits up and wipes the tears from her eyes.

Addison hides her arms in the mass of blanket in front of her. "I might be staying here for a little while. Do you think you could go to my house and get some stuff for me and Alex?"

Why is she staying? The police officer left, so the investigation is over. Callie frowns. "Why are you staying?"

Addison laughs a little and looks down. "It's really stupid actually..." For a moment, she considers telling Callie. Addison knows Callie would never judge her for something like this. But would she ever see me the same again? Addison decides against it. "...They want me to see someone, you know, for the psychological aftermath. Not that I need it, because I'm fine."

Callie stops herself from giving Addison another pitying look. "Okay. But yeah. I'll get your stuff. What do you need?"

That was a close one. "Uhh...just like my toothbrush and pajamas. And the same for Alex. And would you mind feeding Aphrodite?"

Callie shakes her head. "Nuh-uh. No way. I am not getting anywhere near that snake. Don't even bother. Get someone else to do it."

Addison had a feeling that Callie was going to say that. "Please Callie!! She won't hurt you. She likes you. You don't even have to get near her. Just open the cage and put in the food." I should probably not mention that Aphrodite eats live rats. "You can even bring George, if you want."

Callie starts laughing. "George hates snakes more than I do!! He'd run and hide in the corner."

Addison cracks a genuine smile, her first in a while. "Then take Mark. You have my permission. He's not scared of Aphrodite and he'll help you."

Callie lets out a breath of relief. "Okay, thanks."

Addison laughs. "And help yourself to whatever you need or want. You can even take my karaoke machine, in the basement. You'll get a lot of good out of it."

Callie leans on the bed, over Addison's legs, propping herself up on her elbow. "And what makes you say that?"

"Because you're a fantastic singer." Addison says, as if this is something that everyone knows.

Callie blushes. "No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are!" Addison isn't going to let Callie get away with being modest. "Remember karaoke night at Joe's? You had the crowds cheering."

Callie's mouth drops open. "I so did not! One guy, ONE, whistled. And that was because he was drunk and I was wearing a very low cut top."

Addison shakes her head. "You are such a liar. Everyone was dancing and cheering."

Callie looks down. "Whatever. I still suck."

Addison doesn't know what kind of crap Callie is trying to pull. "No. You know how good you are. In fact, it is my wish, right now, for you to sing to me."

"No!" Callie feels very self-conscious, even after years of voice lessons, she never did get over her stage fright without a few drinks in her system.

"Sing!" Addison demands.

"Fine." Callie mutters. It's been a rough day for Addison and she deserves this. Callie runs through the list of memorized songs in her head and picks the shortest one. She sits up and takes a deep breath in. "You've got a friend in me."

Addison laughs loudly and Callie continues. "You've got a friend in me. If you've got troubles, I've got 'em too."

On the next verse, Addison joins her. "There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you. We stick together and can see it through."

Addison sings completely off-tune, but Callie doesn't care. Just to see Addison smile again, it makes Callie think that everything might just be okay. "Cause you've got a friend in me. You've got a friend in me."

Then, Alex peeks his head in the window, so Addison and Callie can't see him. He couldn't help himself; he just had to check to see how Addison is doing. And she's laughing and singing. He almost decides to join them but then he takes one more glance at the grown women dancing around in Addison's bed and decides to leave them be. I could use a nap anyway. I have a whole mess to figure out.

A/N: Callie sings the song from Toy Story.

I've been waiting awhile to write this chapter. I thought about it a lot and it got all smushed in my brain. Hopefully, it turned out all right.

Anyone catch the date of Addison's rape? It's kind of significant to the story because it's a special day. Hint: Orange ribbons.

If you like this story and you like casual reading, may I suggest Ellen Hopkins' Impulse and Patricia McCormick's Cut? They promote self-injury awareness among other things. And they're fantastically written. Impulse is in verse and Cut is a regular novel. I should warn you: they're triggers for that type of behavior. But if you feel safe, I highly recommend reading them. Summaries are at my LJ under the cut "Random Thoughts".

I know, that's the last time I'm going to pimp out other authors in my A/N. I promise.

Sorry for the lack of updates. I'll try to do two chapters next week. In two weeks, I'm going to work camp so there will be a break for a week or so. I don't think I'll be able to get any writing done.

Next chapter: Another big one. I've already written half of it because I write that chapter when I feel angry or sad to put my feeling down on paper. Consequently, most of it's not any good so I'll have to edit. It's mostly Addek friendship with a little Mizzie, as promised. And the real fun begins.

Did I mention it was almost all a flashback?

Thanks for reading my story! 