Hooray for bad Intel [R
Niklas "Hawk" Jonsson

Summary: One of the worst things that can befall a ninja, is going on a mission based on faulty Intel. But for Naruto and his temporary team-mate, it might just turn out to be the best thing to ever happen to them! Completed!

Disclaimer: Naruto, Konoha and whatnot are not mine, though I certainly wish they were. The story is mine though, all mine.
If the layout looks screwy or symbols seems to be missing, you're probably reading the quickedit-mangled version of this fic on ff dot net, if it grates on your nerves too much, read it on hawksgalaxy dot com or something.

Feedback/Flames: Yes, please. Both of them are equally fun to read, although I must admit that I greatly prefer the first variety. :)
I can be found on ICQ as 21771860, MSN Messenger/E-mail as iamhawk at yahoo dotcom, though not very frequently as real life lately interferes with my online existance more then I'd like. More stories are available at my nifty lil' site at hawksgalaxy dot com or by clicking on my handle up above.

"speech"
emphasis/shouts/Kindred Domination/post-hypnotic triggers
/thoughts/
/telepathy/
translation
soundeffect/radio/telephone conversation/TV

Chapter Two:

"There's an island of sorts a ways ahead and a little to the right." Hana announced from her place on Naruto's back, causing him to squint as he tried to make it out.

He'd always had a pretty good night vision compared to others, but as he'd quickly found out in the darkness of the caverns, Hana had him beat by miles in that department.

"I think I can make something out..." he muttered hesitantly and trudged off in that direction, discovering as they got closer that she'd been right.

While the caverns had seemed immense when he'd sent down his clone, it seemed that the only real route they could take, forced him to wade through an icy cold underwater river. The huge cavern they'd wound up in at first had turned out to be just a huge hollowed-out chamber of sorts. They'd made a complete lap around the edges of it, only to discover that the only way out seemed to be following the river downstream. Upstream was a small waterfall that emerged seemingly straight out of the cliffside, making taking that route seem impossible at worst and simply highly inconvenient at best.

But while circling the chamber, at least they had gotten proof that the way back was completely blocked. They'd both heard the scroll go off, followed by an immense amount of noise as rocks crashed against each other, but hadn't really realized the scope of what the scroll had done until they returned to where they had started out at.

It seemed almost as if an entire mountain had collapsed down into the cavern, completely blocking that way out. But as it also completely blocked any angry enemies from following them, neither of the two Konoha Shinobi grieved overly much about that.

But as Naruto emerged out of the water and headed up onto the rocky island, he wondered if he might not have preferred trying to fight the search party instead of running underground to get away from them. He couldn't call his legs numb, as they were constantly aching like hell, both from the icy coldness and his body's attempts to regenerate the damage. But if he hadn't had the Kyuubi sealed inside of him constantly repairing any damage inflicted, they likely would be completely numb and useless at this point.

He had to use a piece of string around the back of his neck, the ends of which he tired around Hana's feet, to keep her from dipping them into the water. She had no way to recover from frostbite, so he was immensely grateful that the water hadn't been any deeper.

But in spite of the fact that Hana hadn't gotten soaked, her teeth were chattering from the cold damp air in the cave. He leaned down and put one of his hands against the rocky island, frowned and walked around it, repeating the process over and over again until he finally let out a tired sigh.

"It's wet all over." he reported with a groan.

"Get down into the water again. I'll deal with it." Hana suggested and Naruto glared angrily at the water for a while, before he did as she said and walked back down into it. "A little further away from the island." she said and he moved off a ways. "There, that's perfect. Turn a little to the left." she instructed and Naruto slowly turned around. "There, stop." she said and took a deep breath of air. "Katon: Housenka no Jutsu!" she bellowed out and spat out several gusts of furiously burning balls of fire that splashed down onto the island.

Waves of heat crashed against them and for a few moments, Naruto wished that he could just walk right up onto the burning island to warm his chilled body. But he waited somewhat patiently until the fires had died down, then Hana spat out another barrage of flaming death upon the island. They had to wait a while longer and then she suggested that they get out of the water.

Naruto headed back up onto the island and reached down, feeling the surface with his hands again.

"It's dry." he announced and Hana exhaled with relief.

"Thank the Kami. I'm stiffer then Kiba reading a copy of Kunoichi Gone Wild!" Hana exclaimed, causing Naruto to chuckle briefly at the mental imagery that particular statement brought forth.

He gently let her down off his back, untied the strings and slumped down onto the ground, leaning back until he was lying down on top of the still somewhat warm boulder, a posture that Hana soon enough emulated. The two of them rested like that for almost ten minutes, before Hana broke the silence.

"Thanks." she suddenly grunted.

"For what?" Naruto asked.

"Not abandoning me back there." she replied after a few moments.

"Those who abandon their comrades are worse then trash..." he mumbled and shook his head. "I'd never do that. It's not my ninja way."

Kakashi hadn't taught him much new stuff, other then the tree walking. The few times the three of them had trained under Kakashi's supervision, their perverted teacher had spent most of his time refining their old skills from the academy or trying to instil some form of teamwork in them.

But the one on abandoning his comrades was one lesson that had really stuck with him and that Naruto had taken to heart, fully and completely.

"Damn, but I'm hungry." Hana announced after a while. Naruto was inclined to agree with her. Unfortunately, they'd had to abandon the fishes and a rabbit that his clones had captured while at the entrance to these caverns. All there was in the way of food now, were Hana's doggy treats and the remaining soldier pills.

"There's been some splashing, so I guess there's fish around." Naruto said after a few moments and slowly raised himself to a sitting position. It wouldn't be easy, with no tools and little light to see in.

"Don't bother. It's more important for us to get dry and get warmer before we freeze to death. Food can wait." she argued and Naruto slowly nodded. "Get over here and help me get up." she told him and Naruto slowly did as she requested. When she was upright with Naruto supporting her, she blew out a long stream of fire against one particular part of the island. "Help me get my shoes and pants off, would you?" she requested and Naruto did so, although with a faint blush as the lack of pants revealed the fact that Hana wore bright red panties and apparently hadn't shaved her legs in a while.

"OOohhhh, that's nice." Hana sighed as Naruto helped her sit down on part of the area she'd just heated up. "Put the pants over there. You'd better leave yours out to dry as well." she instructed with a nod at a small boulder that had been part of the area she'd just heated up. Naruto put her pants there, but hesitated at removing his own. "Get over yourself, kid. You don't have anything I haven't seen before." Hana snorted and Naruto sighed, then stripped out of his shoes and pants as well, putting his pants down next to Hana's. "Great, now get over here." she instructed and had Naruto sit down right in front of her.

She had him very gently pull her legs up against his body and poked her feet into his arm pits, then instructed him to do the same, until both of them warmed their feet in each others armpits.

"Ugh, you need a shave. These are some seriously hairy legs." Hana commented after a while.

"I don't think your legs have seen a razor in a while either." Naruto snorted in retaliation.

"Bah, I've been busy getting the clinic rebuilt and doing missions to scrape together enough money to pay for it. There's been no point in shaving my legs." Hana muttered with a faint blush. "Your feet smells like sewer sludge." she added, scrounging up her nose as she got a whiff of him.

"It 'aint exactly roses and cinnamon over here either." Naruto countered.

"Those whiskers of yours doesn't exactly make you the prettiest guy in Konoha." Hana commented.

"Those facial markings aren't exactly what I find attractive in a woman either." Naruto snapped right back at her.

"Well... At least we've established that the two of us should never breed. That'd be some hairy smelly ugly-ass kids." Hana grunted after a few moments of angry silence, then laughed. "Sorry. I'm just hungry and frustrated at being nothing but a dead weight around here."

"You're not a dead weight. It's dry and the ground is warm now. I couldn't have done that." Naruto admitted after a few moments.

"You don't know any Katon jutsu?" Hana inquired with a surprised tone of voice.

"Nope." Naruto grudgingly admitted.

"Huh... Well, I'll teach you one or two when we get back home. You've certainly earned it, lugging me around these caves and carrying me away from those bastards when everything went to hell." Hana offered, causing Naruto to perk up.

"Really?" he asked, his voice a mixture between giddiness at the prospect of learning something cool and disbelief at her offer.

"Sure thing." Hana agreed.

"For real?!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah." she replied.

"Really, for real?!" he added.

"Yes, I've already told you! But not if you keep this fucking shit up!" she snapped, then grunted. "Sorry..." she apologized, awkwardly patting his right knee.

"Yeah, I'm sorry too." Naruto responded, before the two of them fell into an extended period of silence, broken only by Hana's request for Naruto to turn the trousers over and a bit later, a request to get her trousers and shoes back so they could try to get some sleep.

"Breakfast of champions, eh?" Naruto muttered as he stared down at half a fist of doggy treats.

"I've had to eat them before. It's not too bad, if a bit dry. Got lots of minerals, vitamins and shit, rich in protein as well." Hana responded, already chewing down on some treats. Naruto stared incredulously at her for a few moments, then popped one of them into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully on it before he swallowed.

It was dry, like she'd said. It also reeked like five-day old underwear, but the taste wasn't too bad. He'd had worse over the years. He ate the rest of them and walked down to the shore, cupping his hands and drinking some water, before he helped Hana down so she could do the same. Helping her to take a leak was embarrassing as hell, but he figured that he'd better get used to it.

Until they were back in civilization, they only had each other to rely on.

Once they had finished, Naruto once again helped Hana get onto his back and tied her feet up so they wouldn't dip into the water, then he set off again with her riding piggyback.

It was a dreary couple of days the two of them spent following the underground river. The luck they'd had during their first day underground hadn't quite held up. The water level had increased at several points, causing Hana to get wet and at three points, forcing the two of them to swim for a while as Naruto couldn't reach the bottom.

They'd also had to spend one night cooped up on a small ledge Naruto had drilled out with a Rasengan, as they hadn't found any suitable place to stop at. The two of them had been wet and miserable, huddling up against one another for warmth. They'd had to swim for quite a bit, so even Hana's fire and the warm ledge hadn't provided much comfort. Especially as they once again had to get down into the water once they'd slept.

But after what the two of them assumed had been nearly a full week underground, the river they'd been followed finally led them out into the open again. The two of them blinked owlishly as they tried to get used to their much brighter surroundings. Once he could see again, Naruto trudged over towards the shore and helped Hana sit down on a small grassy knoll. He collapsed beside her and laid down, looking dazedly up at the blue sky.

It wasn't all that hot, in fact, the mountain air was downright chilly, even without the faint breeze that was blowing. But the sun shining overhead felt like a small miracle after all those days in nearly complete darkness and he hardly even noticed the cold in face of that. The two of them rested for half an hour, just laying there in the sunlight, until Hana requested that Naruto help her stand up.

He did so and the two of them carefully examined their surroundings, trying to make sense out of them and discovering where they were.

"I think we've headed northwest." Hana offered, as the two of them looked out over the surrounding landscape from a rugged cliffside. "Look over there, I think that's Yama-san, the highest mountain in the Country of Rock." she suggested and pointed almost straight north at a tall peak in the distance. "And that river over there, I think that is the river that marks the border between the Bird and Rain countries." she added, pointing towards the east.

Naruto shrugged. He'd never bothered much with geography and had no idea of knowing if she was correct or not. He knew that there was a Mount Yama in Rock that was supposedly very tall, but he couldn't tell if she was right or not. The map had gotten completely soaked in the caverns, so that was useless and he'd left it behind four days ago.

At least he thought it was four days ago, telling time underground had been guesswork at best.

But they had crossed a river when they went between Rain and Bird, but he didn't know if it was that particular river that Hana had pointed out.

"We're pretty close to Rock, but they shouldn't have patrols this far into Bird anyway, so we should be safe from them. And those fuckers after us should have no way of knowing where we'd wind up, if we'd wind up somewhere at all, so we've likely lost them. Both Bird and Rain are allies to Konoha, so running across one of their border patrols would be a good thing." Hana mused out loud. "I say we head for the river, see if we can come across one of their patrols or some village on the way there." she suggested and Naruto nodded.

"Sounds like a plan to me." he agreed.

Unfortunately, few plans survive first contact with the enemy.

The enemy, in this case, was the mountains of Bird and the harsh mountain weather. As they headed for lower ground, travelling in the direction of the border to the Rain Country, the weather got progressively worse. Dark clouds appeared, the temperature dropped and it didn't take more then two or three hours after they'd appeared above ground, before snow started to fall.

Naruto thought that it was bad enough for him, but Hana was even worse off. She'd requested that he'd try to keep her awake, so he'd been babbling nearly non-stop for the last hour or so, occasionally asking her a question or otherwise forcing her to respond. Before they started out, the two of them had split the last soldier pill, assuming that it would be easier to gather food now that they were out of the caverns.

But as the snowfall grew progressively worse, Naruto started wondering if it might not be even harder then in the caverns. Visibility was dropping and if he was feeling as cold as he was, then Hana must be halfway dead.

He was at the point when he was considering just stopping and trying to build some kind of shelter, when he spotted what looked like buildings not that far off. He instantly switched directions and headed for them, only to groan as he came closer and saw that it was an old deserted village up along a cliff, likely some form of mining community.

The reason for it being abandoned wasn't all that hard to guess. Nearly half of the village seemed to be missing and quite a few of the buildings that remained seemed half-destroyed by boulders and rubble.

"Avalanche..." Naruto muttered, but kept on heading for the village anyway. At this point, there was little else to choose from. It took him a few attempts, but he eventually located a house that seemed mostly all right. Unfortunately, the door was locked, but a hefty Chakra-enhanced kick solved that little problem.

He kicked the door shut and wedged a kunai between door and doorway to keep it shut, then looked around. The house had apparently been emptied. As it was one of those that seemed to have made it through the avalanche more or less unscathed, the family who used to live here had probably taken all their things with them when the village was abandoned.

He gently put the shivering Hana down against a wall, then got back outside and started looking into the destroyed buildings, where he soon located some badly needed supplies. He created a bunch of clones and tried sending them out, but the harsh winds that had started plaguing the area were so powerful that most of them were destroyed by the winds. He created more and sent them out, instructing them to find whatever useful things they could and bring them back to the house where Hana was, before he rushed off towards it himself.

He'd recovered a bear-skin rug, some dirty towels and some torn curtains. It would have to do for the moment. His own teeth were chattering as he made it back to the house and he didn't even dare to think of how bad it must be for Hana.

The caverns had been bad enough, leaving both of them somewhat cold the entire time. But the weather outside was much harsher, much more dangerous. This freak snowstorm really couldn't have come at a more inopportune time!

He laid the bear-skin out and after a bit of hesitation, carefully stripped Hana out of her wet clothes, leaving her in her red panties. He would have left her in panties and bra, had she worn a bra. He was sure that later recollection of this moment would leave him blushing furiously, but at the moment, he was too worried about his team-mate to be embarrassed. He put her down on the rug, then covered her with the towels as they had made his rush through the storm more or less okay. Three of the curtains hadn't, but he put the two of them that had made it dry over Hana first, then added the three wet ones over them.

She needed every little bit of heat she could get at the moment.

So did he, to tell the truth. But the little he'd done seemed woefully inadequate, so he rushed out again in an attempt to track down more necessities.

"Ugh... Mom? M'cold..." Hana shivered as she woke up, feeling completely drained. She didn't even have the energy to open her eyes. She shifted around and yelped, as her broken right foot made itself reminded. "Fuck!" she screamed and her eyes shot open in spite of her exhaustion. She looked wild-eyed around herself as recollection of her circumstances slowly returned.

Though she must have lost something somewhere, she reasoned as she looked around.

The last thing she could recall was being carried through a snowstorm on the back of her Genin team-mate. Now, she was lying on something warm and soft, covered with what looked like a haphazard collection of towels, blankets, curtains and the pelt of a snow lion. She had a pillow of sorts, fashioned out of what appeared to be a pile of old clothes that she didn't recognize.

She gingerly moved her hand around and discovered that she was dressed only in her panties and bandages. She looked around and spotted a small fire going in a fireplace behind her, where she also spotted her trousers, sweater and Chuunin vest drying over two chairs standing close to the fireplace.

No Uzumaki in sight, however.

"Uzumaki?" she called, but didn't get a response. "Uzumaki!" she shouted, but once again failed to get a response. "He gets five minutes, then I'm hobbling off to look for him." she decided out loud and settled down again, burrowing down underneath the covers.

Fortunately enough, as she was feeling weaker then a new-born pup at the moment, he appeared before the five minutes were up. He was carrying what appeared to be a table without legs and a small pile of books.

"There you are! Where have you been and where are we?" Hana asked.

"O-o-oh, y-y-y-you're awa-a-awake." he commented, his teeth chattering. "De-d-des-deserted m-m-mi-m-mi-mining v-v-v-village." he replied and dropped the books, then set out to break the table, before tossing pieces of it onto the small fire.

"Fuck, you're freezing to death!" Hana exclaimed, observing his shivering body, her eyes widening as she saw his white-bluish fingers that seemed extremely stiff. "Stop that shit, get out of your clothes and get under here!" she snapped.

"N-n-n-n-n-no w-way!" he chattered. "I'll g-go out a-and f-f-f-find s-some m-m-more b-bl-b-blankets f-for m-m-m-me."

"Uzumaki!" Hana snapped authoritively. "If you haven't stripped out of your clothes and joined me underneath these covers before the count of thirty, I'm getting out and stripping you down yourself!"

"Y-y-y-you w-wo-w-wouldn't!" Naruto managed to get out, looking over at her with wide-open eyes and a shocked expression.

"Try me!" she snarled. "Twenty-three." she added and observed how he hesitated for a while. "Seventeen." she counted and Naruto slowly removed an old worn jacket he hadn't been wearing the last time she was awake. "Twelve." she continued.

"G-ge-g-geesh! T-take i-it easy! I'm c-c-co-c-coming!" Naruto exclaimed and laid the jacket out in front of the fireplace, then stripped out of his t-shirt and pants, leaving them in front of the fire as well. He looked over apprehensively in her direction, seeming as if he'd rather bolt outside then join her under the covers.

"Four!" she snarled and that appeared to settle things, as he slowly approached her. She raised the covers and jerked her head, indicating where she wanted him to be.

His eyes widened even further and now he really did seem about to bolt. She followed his gaze to her naked chest, then glared back up at him.

"Uzumaki. It's getting cold and I'd much rather be warm. Now get over here!" she yelled and he gingerly lowered himself, then crawled in underneath the covers with her. "There! Damn it, was that so bloody hard you moronic stubborn jackass?!" she yelled in his face as she lowered the covers onto him, then spun him around and yanked him up against her. "FUCK! You're like an icicle! Moron! Idiot!" she berated him, creeping up against his back, trying to maximise the amount of skin that touched skin. Judging from how extremely cold he was, it was a bloody miracle that he hadn't dropped dead yet.

"Y-y-y-yo-you n-n-ne-n-needed m-mo-more supplies." he chattered.

"Uzumaki, you foolish, foolish moron..." she grunted, rubbing her hands over his chest. "If you drop dead like the sack of shit you appear to have for brains, then how the fuck will I survive?! I can't even bloody walk on my own!" she ranted, took a deep breath and then decided that the stupid fucker needed one final push. "If you'd died, you'd have abandoned me here to die."

"T-t-t-trash..." Naruto mumbled.

"Yes, those who abandon their team-mates are shitfaced punks who deserve to be drawn and quartered!" Hana snapped. "So get this through your thick little head, I need you alive and well." she told him and sighed, calming down a bit. "So no more stupid stunts like these, okay?"

"O-o-o-okay..." he muttered.

"Good!" Hana approved. "Now fucking get some rest." she ordered him. No more then two minutes later, he started to snore and Hana relaxed somewhat.

No less then five minutes after that, she joined him in blissful slumber.

"Go fish." Naruto said and Hana groaned.

"Argh! I hate this game!" she snapped and threw her cards down, shaking her head in dismay. She looked over at the window and grunted at the sight it offered them of the outside world.

Snow.

Lots and fucking lots of snow!

"Is there any rabbit left?" she asked, looking back at Naruto.

"Yeah. Want me to go get it?" he asked and she nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes! Please." she said, almost salivating at the thought of food.

They'd been stranded in the deserted village for the past four days and while the storm from earlier had abated, the snowing showed little signs of letting up. Naruto and his clones had went through the village, scouring it for whatever they could use and while they couldn't very well go anywhere, at least they now lived in relative comfort.

He'd scrounged up a real bed, which was now situated in front of the fireplace. He'd found another one in decent shape, but Hana had declared that it was more useful as firewood then a bed. There wasn't space for two beds in front of the fireplace and as the house was a devil to heat up, in spite of some emergency repairs, it was better to stick with the sharing a bed approach.

He'd found and repaired a table, the one she was now seated at, and found a bunch of mismatched chairs. He'd also recovered some old spices, some plates, bowls and she'd made a set of chopsticks for them to use. He'd lucked out during one of his scavenging hunts and come across a family of rabbits taking shelter in one of the abandoned buildings. Yesterday, he'd also brought home a deer that had ventured a bit too close to the village, so they weren't lacking food, which was incredibly nice.

It felt as if it had been ages since there had been enough to eat and Hana had quite happily stuffed herself so full that she'd been in danger of throwing up after the first real meal here.

It took a bit of effort, but they'd melted and heated enough snow so that they had been able to take a bath each, which had also been incredibly nice.

Some old clothes had also been recovered and Hana was now wearing a pale blue winter kimono Naruto had brought back on their second day here. It was a little too big for her, but it was comfortable and in a better shape by far then what she'd worn when they arrived. Naruto was now decked out in a simple pair of brown working pants several sizes too big, a dark grey t-shirt and when he headed outside, he used a dirty old grey jacket and a pair of cotton mittens he'd found. He'd found a jacket, thick trousers and a pair of sturdy boots for her, but she hadn't ventured outside since their arrival here.

She'd fashioned a crutch for herself to easier move around and so that she could go to the bathroom on her own and her foot was now wrapped up in a supportive brace. She'd used a few of the techniques she used on animals on herself, but while it helped with the pain, it didn't really do anything for the broken bones.

Apparently, the Chakra systems of humans and animals were too different and she didn't know any medical jutsu that dealt with broken bones. She knew a few emergency battlefield healing techniques, but those were for dealing with cuts, bruises and wounds, not broken bones. So she'd done her best and then simply left it to mend on it's own.

The deck of cards he'd recovered earlier today had been a bit of a lucky stroke, as she had been slowly going insane from the boredom of being cooped up inside for four days. Unfortunately, it seemed that the only game he knew was 'Go fish', which bored the hell out of her, even if it was somewhat better then just sitting around.

She resolved to teach him more games, if they were going to be stuck in this bloody place for any longer, however!

"Here you go." Naruto announced as he put down a plate with what remained of a grilled rabbit and a glass of water in front of her.

"Thank you." Hana thanked him with a small smile.

While she did miss her home, she had to admit that it wasn't all too bad here. The kid was surprisingly decent company and had proved himself more then capable.

She had been a bit hesitant at first, when she found out that she was going to go on a foreign mission with the almost legendary 'demon prankster'. But after she'd spoken with Kiba, who'd been in his class at the academy and her mother, who'd come across him a few times when he'd visited Kiba in the hospital after that whole mess with the second Uchiha traitor, she'd calmed down somewhat.

Kiba had first ranted for nearly half an hour about what a jackass Naruto was and the injustice of loosing his fight during the Chuunin exam against him due to a fart of all things. But once he'd gotten that off his heart, he'd calmed down and told her some funny stories about some of the stuff they had pulled at the academy. At the end, he'd wrapped it up with 'Well, I guess Naruto is a decent guy. Annoying as hell at times, but a good guy'.

Tsume had apparently spoken a couple of times with him when they had crossed paths at the hospital during Kiba's recovery. She'd merely grunted out that she was positively impressed at how good the kid had turned out, in spite of everything.

She had yet to find out just what that 'everything' was, but had decided that she didn't really care. It was how people were at the present that was important, not what they had been like.

Not everybody appeared to reason like that however. When they walked together from the final meeting with Tsunade-sama towards the gate, she'd seen the glares, smelled the hatred and heard the angry whispers directed at her companion from large parts of the population.

It seemed harsh, extremely so!

Sure, she'd heard the stories about his outrageous pranks for years and she'd even seen the results of a few herself, even if she hadn't ever been personally targeted by him.

But the sheer amount of raw hatred directed at the poor misguided kid seemed extremely disproportional. Especially considering that he seemed to have eased off on the pranks since he turned Genin. The only thing she could recall off hand was a tale about a stampede of sorts, just before the Chuunin exams and the Sound/Sand invasion. The worst part of it all was that he hardly seemed to take note of it. It was as if he'd gotten so used to it that it was merely part of the background at this point.

He'd been very loud and somewhat obnoxious at first, she had definitively had her fill of claims about becoming Hokage and obviously wildly exaggerated stories about fights with Bingo Book criminals, Sand Demons and even the legendary missing Nin Orochimaru!

She'd indulged the kid by listening and offering the occasional comment and by the time they entered the Country of Rain, he'd calmed down somewhat. When they entered the Country of Bird, they'd achieved a friendly camaraderie of sorts.

But it wasn't until they were unexpectedly ambushed by those Nins that shouldn't have been there, that she'd started to really appreciate him and wonder if there might not have been a few shreds of truth in those tall tales of his.

When those enemy Nins seemed to crawl out of the woodwork all around them, she had thought it was all over, but with a humongous puff of smoke, there was suddenly Shadow Clones all over the place! She had damn well nearly fallen flat on her ass in surprise, but Fireheart and Brightwind had gotten her moving again. His clones had been woefully inadequate as fighters against the battle-hardened missing Nins, but the sheer number of them had allowed the two of them to make their escape.

"Hey, Uzumaki! How old are you?" Hana suddenly asked, not even she herself having been aware that she was about to ask that until her mouth had opened and the inquiry emerged from between her lips.

"My thirteenth birthday was three months ago." he replied. "Why?" he asked.

"Oh, just wondering." she awkwardly replied and reached for the rabbit, tearing a chuck of flesh off the husk and shoving it into her mouth with relish.

Thirteen.

And more mature at thirteen then several guys her own age that she hung around with. Granted, there were others that were more mature, but the fact that he was only thirteen and still this capable, was somewhat impressive.

"Neh, Hana-neechan. How old are you?" Naruto countered and tore off a chunk of flesh for himself.

"I turned eighteen last summer." she replied after she'd swallowed, then yanked off another strip of rabbit.

"Eighteen? And you're still a Chuunin?" he asked.

"I haven't done enough missions to be considered for a promotion." she explained. "Most of my time is spent around the clinic, though I'm occasionally called in for a tracking or scouting mission." she continued, then shrugged. "Then again, I don't have any real desire to become a Jounin either. Chuunin pay is good enough for me and since my real passion is caring for animals at the clinic, well... I figure, why bother? I'd probably decline the opportunity to take the Jounin Exam even if it was offered to me."

"Huh?" Naruto mumbled, obviously having problems understanding the concept of actually turning down a promotion.

"Jounin rank means a higher chance of getting long-term missions and if the worst comes to pass, you can get landed with a team of Genins to train. Sure, the pay is heaps better, but if it means perhaps being forced to be away from the clinic for half a year to complete some mission or perhaps having to shut it down for a couple of years to train a bunch of brats, then it's simply not worth it." Hana added and Naruto pondered that for a while, then slowly nodded. He didn't really understand how she could reason like that, but at least there was some sort of explanation for it, even if he didn't get it.

"Well, I'm going to become a Jounin as soon as possible and then I'll become the Hokage!" Naruto boasted.

"You know, I've heard you say that a whole bunch of times now, but I don't think I've ever heard you explain just why you want to become the Hokage." Hana mused and snatched another piece of rabbit. "Why do you want to become the Hokage?" she asked.

"So that I can protect all my precious people!" Naruto instantly exclaimed. "The Hokage is the strongest ninja of them all, so if I become then Hokage, then I can protect everybody." he added.

"That's a good reason." Hana admitted. /It is a bit childish, but at least his heart is in the right place./ she added in the privacy of her own mind.

She gulped down some of the water he'd brought out in addition to the rabbit, then tilted her head as she considered him for a few moments.

He was a good provider, he was fiercely protective, kind and helpful in the extreme, considering his age, he was also extremely strong and capable.

Good traits, one and all, she decided.

She tore loose another strip of rabbit and slowly chewed on it with a thoughtful expression.

In fact...

She blinked in surprise as she realized that he was just about precisely what she was looking for in a mate.

She smiled to herself and shook her head, clearing her mind. Even if he'd probably be a good mate, he was a bit too young for her. Her forehead creased a bit.

/At least right now... In a couple of years, a five year age difference wouldn't matter all that much./ she suddenly realized and silently observed him again. She drank another bit of water, then absently licked her fingers clean as she observed him.

She'd keep that fact firmly in mind, if both of them were still single a few years down the road.

The End! ( For now... )