Disclaimer: See Chapter 1

Can't Fight the Moonlight

Chapter 13: Unwell

Previously on Can't Fight the Moonlight:

Dragging the cool metal against her skin, Addison let out a breath.

It was just what she needed.

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Mark looked at the floor. "I'm really scared for her. I want to be there for her, but, sometimes, I get the feeling that she doesn't really want me around. Like she's starting a new life with Alex and I'm a part of her old life."

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He tugs her down so she's lying on the bed and kisses her lips. He eyes bore into hers. "I love you."

She wraps her good arm around his neck and pulls him on top of her. "I love you too." She whispers.

They watch each other for a while before Alex rolls over to his side. He's exhausted and falls asleep quickly. It takes Addison an hour or two of distractive thinking until her eyes close. Her hand winds into his t-shirt for the remainder of the night.

I know
I know they've all been talking 'bout me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong
With me

Mark Sloan slapped a cold pack down on Alex Karev's knee. The cold pack, which consisted of ice cubes in a plastic bag, made forceful contact with the knee cap, causing Alex to wince.

"Sorry, man." Mark sincerely apologized. Despite previous skirmishes between him and Alex, he really didn't want to impair Alex's knee cap in anyway. Because before, the kneecap had made forceful contact with Jake Parker's thigh, and for that, Mark was very grateful.

Mark returned to making his world famous chocolate chip pancakes. He flipped one. "I thought that I'd bring over some stuff, just so I don't have to keep going back and forth from my apartment."

Alex taped his knee to keep the strained muscle from moving. "What? Like clothes?"

Mark nodded. "Mostly. Maybe a few books, movies...my tv...the foosball table..."

Alex's eyes widened with eagerness. "Really?!" He wiped the grin off of his face. "I mean, you're not moving in. Right?" I have a certain amount of self-respect, Alex thought, I don't want to be living with my girlfriend and her ex-boyfriend.

Mark laughed nervously. "Oh, yeah. Of course not. Hey, do you think I could get Izzie to join us?"

"Dude, seriously?" Alex shook his head. I can only imagine the thoughts that are running through Mark's head right now.

"What?" Mark laughed. "No, not like that. I think it would be really good for Addison, to have another woman around."

Alex stole a chocolate chip from the bag. "Izzie would never go for it."

Mark expertly maneuvered the spatula around the frying pan. "I don't know, man. I think it's getting crowded over at Meredith's. Between George and the wife, and Cristina and Meredith's extremely-intimate-almost-blood-sisters relationship, I think we could get her on board."

"And, guess what?!" Mark was completely amazed. "She's a tough trailer chick too! AND a model!" Alex saw a little gleam in his eyes, before he blinked it away. Mark continued chattering on, "She could kick the ass of anyone who tries to hurt Addison." Mark cleared his throat. "I mean, after we're finished with him." He motioned between Alex and himself.

"Speaking of..." Alex pointed upstairs. "I don't want to leave her alone for more than a few minutes at a time. I'm going to go check on her."

"Wait," Mark stopped him. "When are the police going to talk to her?"

Alex tapped his fingers on the railing in thought. "Uhh...I'm hoping at the earliest this afternoon. I really think that she needs more time." Especially after the last time that she had to talk to the police.

"Did she sleep through the night?" Mark asked.

Alex nodded. "I think so. She kept tossing and turning, though. I tried to keep an eye on her, but I fell asleep. She didn't leave the room, did she?"

Mark shook his head. "Nope. I'm a light sleeper. No one came in or out."

Alex began moving up the stairs. "Good. Bring up the pancakes when they're done." Before he could get to the third step, the phone rang. He paused while Mark picked it up. He listened for a second, and then told Alex. "It's only Derek. He's just checking in. You can go upstairs."

Alex nodded. That's just fine with me. He was getting anxious again. It's weird. Like a part of me needs to see and hear her to survive. He held his breath as he opened the door.

All day
Staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall

Addison woke up back in her own bed. She yawned. She was already tired and she had only been awake for three seconds. The past three weeks seemed to stretch into one long day. No sleep. No relief.

She was an insomniac. She rarely fell into REM sleep. Yet she never seemed to wake up from a constantly fatigued state of mind. Sleeping with her eyes open.

She was stuck. Somewhere between awake and asleep. A dizzying sensation clouded her head. Literally. Everything in the room seemed to have grey undertones. No color existed. The room was drained of its life, like her.

She felt out-of-control. Her mind and body were no longer connected. Her brain moved in slow motion while her body maintained its regular speed.

She felt numb. Like no one could touch her. No one could affect her. She could only feel the painful reminder of last night as it burned into her skin. It was humiliating.

All night
Hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something

She was facing the bathroom. She didn't try to recall what had happened yesterday. Her pillow was soft and warm and she cuddled into it, bringing the sheets over her body. Expecting to see Alex, she looked over her shoulder.

He wasn't there. It was only now that she noticed the voices downstairs.

Her brain told her to be afraid.

Paranoia.

Fear.

Panic.

Pain.

Where's Alex?Am I going to get hurt?Is someone coming after me?Who was that man?Is he going to kill me?What is that noise?Did I just hear footsteps?Where did Alex go?Did he leave me?Why am I all alone?Am I going crazy?WHERE'S ALEX?

But her body was too exhausted to feel all of these things. She was too tired to even think. So, she rested until the door opened to reveal Alex.

I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

Alex was surprised to see her awake. He smiled. "Good morning."

She glanced at him for a second, and then went back to staring at the wall.

He slid down on to the bed. "I hope you slept well." He paused. "The police are going to come by later to talk to you again, about what happened yesterday."

No reaction.

"It can wait," he consoled. "But they've already talked to me. It wasn't bad."

For the first time, Alex realized that she hadn't spoken a word. Why isn't she complaining, or begging me to get her out of it? "Are you feeling okay?"

She was facing away from him and made no move to turn around. Something was wrong. He pulled on her shoulder to turn her. "Hey."

She lied on her back and Alex grabbed her hand. "What's going on?" He twisted slightly and buried his face in her side. "Talk to me." He wrapped his arms around her. I'm losing her. She might disappear any second. He clung to her. "Don't do this."

She lifted her hand and placed it on his head. Her first acknowledgment that he even existed.

He watched her for a second. "Okay." He moved up her body and kissed her. "I understand. Yesterday was terrible. But he's in jail. He's never going to hurt you again."

There was no response from Addison. "Please, can you talk to me? I just want to know if you're okay. Can you nod or anything? Please?"

Addison didn't move.

Alex swallowed. "Take your time."

Slowly, slowly she turned her head to look at him. His eyebrows furrowed in concern. What's wrong? Why isn't she talking to me? She can trust me with anything.

She opened her mouth, but no words came out. Alex grabbed her hips and pulled her closer to him. "What? What, Addie?" She almost did it. She almost spoke.

Her eyes apologized to him and he accepted that. Obviously this is psychological. I wish I knew how to help her. "Okay." He hugged her. "What can I do to make it better? Hmm?" He captured her lips between his and breathed into the skin right below her jaw. "I'm not going anywhere," he reassured her.

"Guess what?" Kiss. "Mark's going to bring you some of his very best pancakes for breakfast." Breathe. "Will you eat them?" Please say yes. Alex felt her shrug ever so slightly against him. He noticed her breathing was a little shallow. Maybe he was crowding her, making her claustrophobic. He moved off of her and lay on his back, mirroring her.

He entertained their fingers under the sheets. "I love you." She gripped his hand tighter. "I know it's hard. I just feel like I'm having a conversation with myself."

Addison felt badly, but she couldn't speak. She just didn't have the energy or the will. She wanted him to understand. She just needed to be quiet for a little while.

"Please. Can you talk for me?" He so desperately wanted to know what she was thinking, what she felt, especially after yesterday. "Please talk. I miss the sound of your voice. It's my favorite sound in the entire world. Please don't take it away from me." She groaned very softly. He felt bad. He didn't want her to be in pain.

"Maybe we could go away for a while. I could take you on vacation. It would be just the two of us. No worries, no interruptions."

Addison really wanted to tell him how great that sounded. But she didn't move or make any sounds so Alex tried again. "Or we could go on a fancy dinner and a carriage ride with flowers and romance."

Again, Addison didn't speak.

"Come one," he joked, "that was the most romantic cliché date ever." He laughed. "I should have known. You're not really a cliché kind of woman."

Addison wasn't even listening now. She was blocking him out. If I even say one word, he'll make me talk about what happened. She couldn't listen to him trying so hard.

Alex rested his head on her shoulder. "How about a bath? Right now? Nice and warm with lots of bubbles."

Addison closed her eyes and surrendered to his voice. She nodded her head. Alex was very pleased. "Okay. I'll start the bath water. Don't move."

He was back after only a moment. "I'll carry you." He placed her on the side of the tub and started to take off her top, but he saw her tense and he let the cloth fall back onto her body. Maybe she still feels uncomfortable. "You can do it. I won't watch." I don't want any connection to that monster who violated her. I'll make her see that I'm not like that, that I respect her. He turned around to give her some privacy. She stared at the floor and very, very slowly removed her clothes. When he heard her settle into the bath tub, he turned back around. The bubbles covered most of her, and he kept his attention to her face, making sure that she knew there would be no sneaking glances or taking advantage of her nudity. He pushed some of her hair back, fingering the damp ends.

"There. Do you feel better?"

Still, no answer, but her eyes were closed and she looked very relaxed. She opened her eyes and then reached up to touch his face. He saw a flash of red on her arm and she knew something was wrong. She dropped her arm back into the bath water to hide it. He reached into the water and pulled her arm back out. He frowned at the sight of the new cut on her. It looked better having been cleaned a little from the water, and it wasn't deep at all. But it was another cut and Alex couldn't watch her hurt herself anymore. At the moment, he couldn't even look at her. It made him sick that he couldn't help her. He stood up and ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know what to do...I- I can't..."

Addison shifted in the bath tub. He had every right to be angry with her, but her heart was pleading for him not to leave.

Alex paced the room and then, suddenly, he stopped. "Hold on," he said. "I'll be right back. Do not do anything." He was gone for less than a second and came back with a business card and the phone. "I can't do this on my own. I'm calling Abby."

Hold on
I'm feeling like I'm headed for a
Breakdown
I don't know why

Abby, Addison's psychologist was sitting in her office reading a book when Alex called. Luckily for him, she wasn't with a patient. "Hello? Dr. Abby Levenkron speaking."

"Dr.- Abby? It's Alex, Addison's boyfriend. Addison Montgomery. Can you talk to her?"

Oh-no, Abby thought, if the boyfriend is calling, it must be bad. "Of course, Alex. What's going on?"

Alex sat on the edge of the tub, watching Addison carefully. She had not moved. "Jake Parker- the guy who attacked her- came back to our house. He terrorized her, but luckily I got home in just enough time. He's in jail for now, but they need her testimony to convict him. She's not talking and I found a new cut and-"

"Slow down, Alex." Abby interrupted. "Take a few deep breaths." He could probably use a few therapy sessions too. "What is she doing now?"

Alex calmed down. "She's taking a bubble bath. I'm here with her."

"Do you know what happened with Jake?"

Alex's voice became high-pitched again. "I don't know! She won't talk to me! All I know is that he was trying to kill her when I entered the room." It was the most frightening moment of my life.

"It's okay, Alex." Abby reassured. "The silence is just a coping method for what she's been going through. Anyone would be a little crazy after experiencing that. She's not ready to deal with this new crisis because she's still managing with the last one. She's probably tired and she just needs to catch up." She paused. "It's a long recovery process and she's not going to get better right away."

"I know, I know." Alex rubbed his eyes. "But I thought that she would stop hurting herself and now with the trial and the interview, every day will be a reminder of what happened to her."

Abby cradled the phone between her ear and her shoulder so she could update Addison's file. "Just remember that there is hope. People have come through these sorts of events with minimal damage. It's going to take a long time, but I think she'll make it. In a few weeks, she should start acting like her old self again. I've worked with a lot of self-injurers, some who have experienced rape, and I'm currently developing a treatment plan for Addison that has been successful with a lot of them. Usually, there are a few things that will trigger a painful memory, but I'm confident that she will lead a normal life afterwards."

Alex felt greatly relieved at her words. She'll be her old self again?! "That sounds fantastic."

Abby put away her paperwork. "Would you like me to talk to her now?"

Alex glanced at Addison. "Yeah, that would be great. Here." He held the phone up to Addison's ear until she put her soapy hand over his and took over. He didn't know what Abby said, but it seemed to have a good effect.

Afterwards, Addison gave the phone back to Alex.

"Hello?" He asked.

"Alex." It was still Abby. "I don't think that she's ready to talk about anything yet. Make sure that she rests and if any of the police officers give you a hard time about delaying her testimony, then have them call me. Have others close to her talk to her. She can hear you and the sounds of your voices will make her more comfortable. After a day or so, if she isn't speaking yet, call me."

Alex wished that he had a pen and paper to write all of that down. "Okay. I'll try to remember all of that."

"Thank you for calling." Abby sighed. "You're doing a great job. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye."

I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know, right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

After getting fully bathed, Addison settled back into bed. She noticed a plate of chocolate chip pancakes on the comforter. Her mouth watered. Her temperamental stomach hadn't allowed her to eat much food for a couple of days. She sat up; crossing her legs, and ate quietly. Alex sat next to her, giving her about a foot and a half of space. He didn't say anything while she ate and she was just glad to be in his presence.

After some time, the doorbell rang. She glanced at him nervously. He patted her leg. "Don't worry. I'll get it."

She grabbed his hand, pulling him back towards the bed. She didn't want him answering the door. The last time that doorbell rang, it nearly killed her. Attempting to soothe her worried eyes, he smiled. At lease she was showing interest in him again. "It's okay," he said. "I'll be right back."

She let go of him and crossed her arms. Tears welled in her eyes. Don't go. I need you.

He started to say something, but the doorbell rang again. Mark must have left for work. Alex jogged downstairs to catch the person before they gave up and left. He opened the door.

It was Derek.

He pushed past Alex without even an invite into the house. "Hey. Mark called me. He got paged to an emergency. Burn victim. I'm here to fill in."

"Oh, well, thanks." Alex was still processing the fact that Derek was here. He hadn't even known that Mark had left and Derek was moving so quickly.

As Alex shut the door, Derek hung up his coat in the closet. How many times has he been here? Alex wondered. I know they stayed friends after the divorce, even before we started dating, but he's acting like he lives here.

Derek effortlessly made his way through the house and talked as he moved. "If it's okay, Meredith and Izzie are going to bring over some food later." He got a glass out of the cupboard, filled it with water, and chugged it in two seconds flat.

Alex gathered his courage and spoke up, "I think you need to slow down, man." Whoa. When did I become the calm one?

Derek looked up. "What?" Another glass of water swirled down his throat.

Alex opened the refrigerator and threw him a water bottle. "You're talking and moving really fast. Are you okay?"

Derek put the water bottle down and Alex could see that his hands were shaking. "Yeah." He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a second. He looked down at the counter. "I just can't believe that he came back. It was supposed to be over. But he came back. And he hurt her again. And it's not fair because she's such a good person. She doesn't deserve this."

Alex leaned on the counter. "No one does."

Derek sipped his water. "Especially not her though. She didn't do anything wrong. He hurt her." And I hurt her too, when had an affair with Meredith, when I told her that I never wanted to see her again. How could I be so stupid? "It's terrible."

Alex stood up. "It is." He paused. "She's not talking. Literally. She won't speak. Her therapist says it's okay. That it will get better. But she's not talking."

Derek appeared concerned. "She's not talking?"

Alex shook his head. "She's not talking. Apparently, she needs time to process things."

Derek thought about this for a while and then shrugged. "It makes sense." He leaned against the sink.

Alex looked down and scowled. He was slightly jealous that Derek could understand this psychology of silence better than he did.

Derek eyed the staircase. "Can I see her? Or would it be too painful for her?"

Why would it be painful for her to see him? Alex thought. "No, you can see her. I think she would like it. Abby, the therapist, said it would be good for her to listen to the voices of people close to her. "He glanced outside."I'll go tell the police officers that she needs a little more time before she can talk to them."

Derek pointed upstairs. "Where is she?"

"In our bedroom, eating pancakes. Do you know where it is?"

Derek was already headed there. "Yeah." When Derek entered the room, Addison was finished with her pancakes and the plate was sitting on the comforter again. She was lying on her back, staring at the ceiling. She heard him come in, but she didn't look at him. He walked in and moved to the side of the bed, letting his hand graze hers.

"Alex says you haven't been talking."

Addison's fingers twitched on the bed, but he didn't notice. "I guess he wasn't exaggerating." Derek chuckled a little at nothing.

"People miss you at Seattle Grace. Everyone keeps asking about you, how you are, when you'll be back." Derek hoped he could lift her spirits a little. "Mark and Izzie flirt and banter constantly. You know, like we used to. It's kind of sickening actually." Every time Derek saw Mark and Izzie, he made a mental note to be more careful with his public displays of affection with Meredith. "Mark might really like her." Derek thought about how much Mark had grown. The difference between Mark in New York and Mark in Seattle was immense. Mark in Seattle is mature...and responsible. Derek almost couldn't believe it. It felt weird, going to Mark with personal problems and getting actual advice, no just a sarcastic comment. Addison had changed him for the better. "You know, it seems like a paradox, but I think the mess of this past year may have made him a better person."

Her eyes fixed on the same spot on the ceiling. Derek wondered how she could go so long without blinking. "Dr. Torres- Dr. O'Malley- Callie misses you a lot. She's been really busy lately. She's going to come by soon, she says. But she wants you to lock the snake in a room with barbed wire and steel around it. Did you know that she and Dr. O'Malley are trying to get pregnant? Can you imagine what that kid is going to be like? You'll have your hands full when babysitting. She'll definitely want you to deliver the baby."

He thought that he almost saw her crack a tiny smile, but he couldn't be sure. "I think Bailey is getting tired of being outnumbered by the male attendings. The interns are driving her crazy. I guess there's nothing new about that."

He could tell she was enjoying this. He was glad that she made so many friends who care about her when she first moved to Seattle. "And Burke- he asks about you everyday. He wishes that he had time to come over. It's not that he doesn't want to see you. He wanted me to tell you that his sister went through something similar to what you experienced and that she's doing great now. So you're going to get better." Derek kept telling himself that.

Addison sighed and he realized for the first time that she was looking at him. At least she didn't have any brain damage from yesterday. He sat on the edge of the bed, not wanting to push the boundaries of her personal space. "How do you like Abby? Meredith saw her regularly for a while and now she goes back sometimes. She's always saying that a person would be emotionally healthy if they spoke to Abby at least once a week."

Derek grimaced. "I don't know if I was supposed to tell you that. Don't tell Meredith." He laughed. "I just realized how weird this is. My ex-wife and my girlfriend are seeing the same therapist. It's funny, isn't it?" Derek laughed again, hoping she would join him. Addison could never resist a laugh. "I don't know...Meredith seems better these days. She's going to stop by later to bring food. Mind you, she didn't make it herself, but it's the thought that counts." Derek sighed. It's surprising that Meredith is even doing this. She's been really jealous lately. "I just don't know what to do with her. Half the time she's completely committed to me, the other half she wants to see other people. Sometimes she shuts herself off and I know she's depressed. But other times I think the bad days are over for good."

He sat there, waiting for her response. "Ad, please. I need your help. I need my best friend. Tell me what to do. Come on, you love that."

Addison swallowed. He hardly ever asked her for advice on Meredith. Maybe he was really moving on from the one thing that put a damper on their friendship. But she expected that he was only trying to get her to talk, so she kept quiet, but she stared apologetically.

He leaned over her. "Just say something. Anything."

Addison bit her lip and looked away nervously. He was crowding her. She scooted back, away from him.

Derek watched her, hurt. She'd never backed away from him before. He sat up. "I'm sorry." I'm not used to feeling helpless. I cannot do anything. "I really wish you would talk." She seemed so troubled. "What's wrong?" he asked, not really expecting an answer. "I know you feel like you've made a bunch of mistakes, but most of them aren't even you fault." He ran one of his fingertips over the hairline next to her temple. Her expression turned slightly more peaceful. Derek smiled, "I hope that you don't consider our marriage to be one of these mistakes. And I hope you don't consider the demise of our marriage to be one either. Because they weren't. I just thought that I should tell you that while you were quiet and unwilling to retort."

She stared at the same place over his shoulder.

"Okay." He was tired of pleading and begging and apologizing. At least for now. "I'll go and get Alex. Meredith and Izzie should be over soon."

He patted her on the arm before exiting the room. As soon Meredith and Izzie got to the house, Derek was paged to the hospital. He left Meredith and Izzie in the kitchen and Alex with Addison in her room. His patient had coded and was rushed to an emergency surgery, but the patient had died anyway. The perfect end to a perfect day, Derek thought bitterly. He pulled off his scrub cap and saw Burke and Mark staring at the OR board. He slowly stepped up to the board. It always calmed him, seeing the straight lines and everything in the right place. Mark did a double take. "What the hell are you doing here?! You're supposed to be at Addison's, helping Alex!"

Derek stepped back in defense. "Calm down, Meredith and Izzie are there with him."

Burke and Mark stared at him. Finally, Mark spoke, "You left Alex alone with Meredith, Izzie, and Addison?"

Burke shook his head. "What were you thinking?"

Derek froze. "Do you think the chief will get mad if his three only attendings left to go rescue an intern?"

Mark nodded. "Definitely."

Burke, the good guy, stepped in, "I'm not sure this is such a good idea." He frowned.

Derek led them into the locker room. "We really should go. Alex has had such a rough day. Addison's not speaking at all now."

Burke wrinkled his nose in confusion. "She's not speaking?"

"Speaking, talking..." Derek listed, "but she does make noises and eye contact."

Mark purposely banged his head on the locker in frustration. "I should have been there."

Burke opened his locker. "Did you have anyone check her out after yesterday?"

Mark nodded. "She's fine. Alex looked her over last night. He said nothing but a couple of bruises."

Burke cleared his throat. "I meant psychologically. She must be terrified."

Derek and Mark were silent.

Burke pulled out his jacket and slammed the locker. "Seriously?!" he murmured. He stormed around the locker room. "She hasn't talked for a day after a MAJOR crisis and you two didn't even think to get her checked out?!"

Mark scratched his head. "Wait! Just wait a minute! Alex called earlier this afternoon and he might have said something about her therapist. That she talked -well, listened- to her on the phone. And Alex has been talking to her all day."

"And I talked to her this afternoon!" Derek chimed in.

Burke leaned against the lockers and closed his eyes. They would never understand. "Okay. Let's just go."

Derek and Mark threw on their coats and the men headed out the door. When they turned the corner to the lobby, they nearly slammed into Richard.

Richard stopped them. "And just where do you think you're going?" He cocked an eyebrow.

Burke smiled warmly while Derek and Mark stood there frozen with their mouths wide open. Burke patted Mark and Derek on the back and whispered, "Run."

They both looked at him, confused. Richard peered at them. "What's going on?"

Burke whispered again, "Go. Now. While you still can. I'll stall him and you can escape. I'll meet you at the house later. GO!"

Mark and Derek took the hint and scurried off in the opposite direction. Richard groaned and then scowled at Preston.

Burke grinned and flashed his famous pearly whites.

Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow
I've lost my mind

Mark and Derek arrived at the house and told Meredith and Izzie that they could leave. Izzie, who was enjoying the large house and the double ovens, was disappointed to go and planned on coming back to make more baked goods for Addison. But it also seemed like she and Mark were always in opposite places and she never got to see him. They shared a quick kiss in the shadows before she and Meredith took off. Meredith left Derek with a warning stare that said: You'd better be home on time tonight or else you're in BIG trouble.

Mark and Derek headed upstairs. Alex was sleeping with his arm wrapped around Addison protectively. Addison's eyes were closed, but they snapped open when the men entered the room.

"Hey," they whispered.

Alex snuggled further into Addison and she rubbed his neck comfortingly. Alex woke up, swallowing thickly. He jolted to a sitting position when he saw Mark and Derek. He rubbed his eyes. "How long have you two been standing there?"

They shrugged. "Just a few seconds."

Mark stared at Addison, who was watching Alex. She really isn't talking. "Hey. Did you sleep well?"

She turned her head towards Mark and looked at him with an expression that he couldn't quite identify. He was stunned. Addison LOVED to talk.

Derek and Mark sat on the bed. Alex felt a little crowded, but Addison didn't seem to mind.

Derek spoke first. "Burke will be over soon. He wants to see Addison. He just got stuck at the hospital, because of Richard. Richard was a little angry that we left, but I'm sure he'll get over it soon."

Addison eyed him nervously. From what Derek had told her earlier about him, Burke would probably want to talk about what happened, something she definitely was not ready for.

Mark's head was still stuck in the past. "Addie, do you remember when we would go shopping back in New York? You were such a chatterbox. You could talk for hours about shoes and purses and designers. Don't you remember that?"

He laughed a little, but Derek and Alex felt left out. Mark leaned forward, closer to Addison. She stared him in the eye. "Tell me about your favorite designer again," He demanded, "I'll listen this time, I promise. I really, really..." Mark's voice cracked. "...want to know. So please tell me." Tears started to well up in his eyes.

Derek put a hand on his shoulder. "Mark..."

"Shut up," Mark cut him off. "Both of you, you had your turns. Now it's my turn to talk to Addison."

"Addie," He grasped her hand, but she yanked it away. There was no love, no comfort here. He wasn't giving her what she wanted. Still, Mark persisted. "Don't you want to get revenge? Don't you want to punish him? That- Jake Parker! He could go away for life if you testify! Please don't let him go free. It would make me so sick. I would have to kill him. And then I would go to jail, and there would be a lot of pissed-off fifty year old women who depend on me for their yearly face-lifts and tummy-tucks. I believe that you do not want that. I know you want to talk!! I know you do!"

He stared at her so intensely that she could hardly breathe. She started gasping for air and Alex sat her up, so she could catch her breath. Her hand grasped Alex's arm so tightly that his veins popped out. Alex brushed his lips over her cheek to calm her down.

Mark slid down to the ground with his head between his knees. Derek stalked off into the corner.

The room was a mess when Preston walked in. He didn't ask what was going on. He already knew. Addison stared at him in shock and anxiety. She had no idea what he was going to do and she was fearful. But, Preston simple walked over to the bed and took her face in his hands. He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs until she closed her eyes. She felt miraculously at peace. He let his hands fall to his sides.

"You need to get up. You need to move on. You need to talk. There is no other option."

She just watched him in awe. The Preston Burke that she knew talked in facts and reasoning. Never had she heard so much emotion from his voice.

He continued, "A lot of really bad things happen to a lot of really good people. No one knows why. They just do. I have learned, from experience that it is best to take a day to rest and then you move on. Your day of rest is over. You will move on."

"You might think that you're the only person in the world who experiences such events, that you're the only person who crazy once in while or more than that."

"The truth is, everyone goes crazy. And it happens every day. We all do things. It is not just you."

"I know that man said some terrible things to you. I know this because I've heard those things said to someone I hold very dearly in my heart. I also know that none of those things are true. He attacked you, physically and emotionally. He manipulated you and your feelings to suit his own interests."

"Do NOT let his actions claim your life. He was WRONG. There are so many people who need you. There are so many children and mothers and even fathers who live because of you. Every second that he takes from your life, he takes from theirs."

"Come back to us. We love you and care about you. You will be fine. Trust me, I know."

All of the men in Addison's life watched her, holding their breaths for any word. They realized this was it. If she didn't talk now, she would never be the same.

She looked at all of them desperately. She didn't want to talk. She couldn't. She wasn't ready. She needed more time. Please, she begged. Don't make me.

Preston was worried. He gave it his best shot. That was a fantastic speech, if I didn't say so myself. Why is she looking at us like that? Doesn't she know how hard it was for me to talk about it? Reliving all of those painful memories, it would have been a waste if she doesn't talk now.

Addison looked at Alex. He seemed so hopeful and so lost at the same time. She put her hand on his knee and stroked the bandage that he wore from this morning.

Her mouth dropped open and a noise came out, sort of like an open-mouthed hum. She tried again and her voice came out hoarse, "I'm so sorry about your knee."

Alex grabbed her and pushed her into the bed, kissing every part of her that his lips could reach. Mark and Derek tackled Preston in a big, manly, bear hug.

Preston wore a smile on his face. For the first time, he felt genuinely at peace about his past.

A/N: LESS THAN A WEEK!! And longer than ever. Please tell me that I rock your world. (If you don't it's okay, because I'm just automatically going to assume it.)

I wasn't really sure about the characters in this one. I hate writing them OOC, but sometimes it just has to happen. But I really did ask myself the question: "If Mark, Alex, and Derek had Addison alone in a room and she couldn't talk, what would they say?" I really only got to Derek, because Alex was just so darn worried and Mark kind of had to share his scene with Preston, who totally stole his thunder.

And I'm just curious (for future stories)... but who is your favorite Addison/character pairing? Obviously you like Addison/Alex on some level if you're reading this story.

Review. Pleaseandthankyou.

Next chapter: Addison and Alex do cute things together!!!! I can see it in my head and I'm already like "Awwww". I haven't even written it yet. Also, Alex freaks out. Then, Mark freaks out. And then Derek helps. Probably.

Thank you for reading my story!!!!!!!