Judge Owlsen banged his gavel on the desk.
"Cyril Sneer, you are charged with the assault and battery of Sophia Tutu Sneer," he said. "How do you plead?"
"Not guilty, you're honor," Cyril said.
"I object your honor!" Bert shouted, jumping to his feet. "It's obvious that he's lying!"
"Overruled," Judge Owlsen said, banging his gavel.
"Your honor," Bert said, continuing. "I am here to prove beyond the shadow of a doubt, habeas corpuscle, and all that fancy lawyer talk there, that Cyril Sneer is guilty as charged!"
"Oh good grief," Judge Owlsen groaned, massaging his right temple. "Another TV lawyer wanna-be."
Cedric took off his glasses and began rubbing his eyes. He had a feeling that this was going to be a long trial.
"I don't think we have anything to worry about, Cyril," Wilbur said. "With a counsel like Bert Raccoon, I think you're going to be home free."
"I hope," Cyril said.
"Your honor," Bert continued. "For my first witness, I'd like to call Cyril's faithful employees, Lloyd, Floyd, and Boyd Pig to the stand!"
The Pigs gulped, and walked up to the bench. The bailiff walked over to them.
"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help me?" he asked.
"Yes," the Pigs said in unison.
Bert walked over to the Pigs and glared at them.
"Where were you night the crime took place?" he asked.
"Working," Lloyd said.
"Yeah, the boss told us to get some work done," Floyd replied.
"Were you actually in the house in between the hours of seven thirty and nine thirty PM?" Bert asked.
"Well . . . ." Boyd said. "He, uhh, he said he needed us to head over to this one business he was investing in to scope it out."
"And what time was this?" Bert asked.
"Around eight o' clock," Lloyd replied. "We didn't get back until around ten, I guess. The boss told us not to come back to the house until then."
"I think this speaks for itself, your honor," Bert said. "Cyril Sneer was trying to get all the witnesses out of the house, as the attack took place in between seven thirty and nine thirty that night!"
"That's ridiculous!" Cyril shouted. "I had a lot of work to do at the house, and I had to check the investment I was making! I had to get the Pigs to do it so I could get my own work done!"
"I have only one more thing to ask you three," Bert said, ignoring Cyril completely. "Is it true that your employer has threatened you over the years you've been working for him?!"
The Pigs began to shudder then. They were hoping they wouldn't get asked this question. They had a feeling that Cyril would probably wring their necks if they told the truth, but they couldn't lie under oath, either.
"Uhh . . . ." Boyd said, nervously. "Can we take the fifth?"
"By not answering this question, your honor," Bert said. "You can clearly tell that Cyril Sneer is guilty as charged."
"Objection your honor!" Wilbur shouted.
"Overruled," Judge Owlsen said. "The witnesses will answer the question."
The Pigs gulped. Even though it probably meant their jobs (and their heads), they had to tell the truth.
"Yes," they said in perfect unison.
"Mr. Sneer has given threats to us," Floyd said. "He's called us nincompoops, nitwits, idiots, that sort of thing."
"And he's threatened to turn us into bacon bits," Boyd said. "And turn us into chops, cook our bacon . . . . ."
"No further questions, your honor," Bert said, sneakily.
"I was hoping he wouldn't play that card," Wilbur said. "We're going to have to take another tactic."
Wilbur stood up, and walked over to the Pigs, to begin his interrogation.
"Let me ask you guys a question," he said. "If Cyril Sneer makes threats at you all the time, why do you still work for him?"
"Well, because half the time he's right about calling us names," Lloyd said.
"Yeah," Floyd said. "We're pretty much too stupid to walk out of a job like this!"
"That's for sure," Cyril mumbled under his breath.
"That is all," Wilbur said, shrugging.
The Pigs stepped down from the witness stand, and raced out of the courtroom before Cyril could have a chance to strangle them. Bert's next witness was Ralph.
"Where were you on the night of the attack?" he asked.
"On my way to a baseball game," Ralph said.
"And just how do I know you were actually on the way to a ballgame?"
"You were with me, Bert, remember? You, Melissa, and I had four tickets, and we invited Cedric to go to the game with us. You came with us to pick up Cedric."
"Oh yeah, I forgot."
Cyril groaned. Wilbur rolled his eyes.
"Methinks you're gonna get off easy," he said. "What with an interrogation like this."
"Mr. Raccoon," Bert said. "Please tell the court what you know about Cyril Sneer."
"Well . . . ." Ralph said, pausing to think about this for a moment or so. "I know he once tried to destroy the Evergreen Forest by cutting down all the trees. And then he tried to build a skating rink over the lake. And when we had that hockey game to save the lake, he had these huge bears and it was more of a massacre than a hockey game, actually."
"So you're willing to go out on a limb and say that Cyril Sneer is not a very nice guy?"
"Well, yes, I'd say that."
"And what would you say his relationship is to the victim?"
"Well, I know he doesn't like Sophia. I don't think he ever did, and I don't think he ever will."
"No further questions, your honor."
Wilbur got up, paced around the courtroom for a few moments, and then turned to Ralph.
"Mr. Raccoon," he said. "Are you willing to say that you find my client to be a bully?"
"At times, yes," Ralph admitted.
"And you do agree that he has a reputation for being a liar, and being heartless?"
"I admit, yes, he does."
"Do you honestly think he'd attack his daughter-in-law for just the sole purpose that he doesn't like her?"
"No, that I honestly don't think he would do. I think that Cyril can be pretty heartless, but nobody is that heartless."
"Are you sure that my client is not guilty?"
"Well, to tell you the truth, no, I'm not positive that he didn't do it."
"That is all."
Ralph stepped down. Bert's next witness was Cedric.
"Cedric, describe your relationship with your father," he said.
"Well, Pop's sort of . . . . . I mean," Cedric said, a little nervously. "Pop's not your typical father figure. He works all the time, and doesn't really think of much except money."
"Isn't it true, Cedric, that on your wedding day, your father tried to ruin it?"
"Well, yes, that's true. He did."
"And isn't it true that he kicked you and Sophia out of the house five months after your son was born?"
"Yeah . . . . but he did let us move back in."
"Now, have there been instances where your father has called you names, pushed you around, that sort of thing, huh?!" By that time, Bert had shoved himself into Cedric's face. Cedric was getting a little nervous about this whole interrogation.
"Uhh, Bert?" he asked. "Don't you think you're getting a little carried away?"
"A little?!" Ralph and Melissa asked in unison.
"Mr. Raccoon, please calm yourself down a little," Judge Owlsen said.
"Sorry, your honor," Bert said, smiling sheepishly.
"The witness will disregard the question," Judge Owlsen said. "Mr. Wolf, please begin your cross examination of the witness."
"Cedric, you say your father isn't the typical father type," Wilbur said. "Would you please elaborate on that?"
"Well, there have been times where he has been a little rough," Cedric answered. "I mean, Bert is right about one thing. He has called me names, and he has pushed me around a lot, but I wouldn't say he'd be the type to do any physical harm to Sophia. I don't think."
"What time did you leave for the baseball game that night?"
"Around seven thirty. It was an out of town game we were going to."
"What time did you return home?"
"Around nine thirty. See what happened was the game was supposed to start at eight forty-five, so we got to the stadium at eight thirty. Then we found out that the game had been cancelled, because the other team was unable to come. It had to do with inclimate weather where they were coming in from, so we went back to the car, and drove back home."
"Please tell the court what you did when the Raccoons dropped you off."
"Well, when I went inside, I heard Pop say something to Sophia, something along the lines of 'what am I gonna do with you.' I'm not quite sure. So I walk into the room, and Pop's kneeling over Sophia, and he's holding a baseball bat. Sophia was laying on the ground, and she was covered with bruises, and she was crying. She never told me what happened. She never seemed to want to talk about it."
"Do you think your father is guilty?"
"That's what I'm not sure about."
"That is all."
Cedric stepped down. It wasn't looking good for Cyril, even though Bert's interrogations were pretty much starting to get on the ridiculous side. Finally, Bert had one final witness. And that was Cyril himself.
"Mr. Sneer, please tell us what you honestly think of your daughter-in-law," Bert said.
"What I honestly think of her?" Cyril asked. "Hmm. Well, she's a nice girl. And by nice, I just mean nice. She's a goody-two-shoes. I'm not too crazy about those types."
"So I can assume that you don't like her."
"I'm not fond of her, that's all I have to say."
"One more question, Mr. Sneer. Did you do it?"
"No!"
"He's lying your honor!"
Judge Owlsen banged his gavel and glared at Bert.
"Mr. Raccoon, one more stunt like that, and I'll find you in contempt!" he shouted. "Now please, step down! Mr. Wolf, please cross examine the witness."
Wilbur stepped up and took a deep breath.
"Mr. Sneer, please tell the court your account of what happened that night," he said. "From seven thirty to nine thirty."
"Well, those raccoons came to the door, and Cedric left with them to go to a baseball game," Cyril said. "That left me, the Pigs, Sofa Girl, and my friend Silas Morales in the house. And my dog Snag, and my grandson, Forest, but they don't have anything to do with this."
"I object your honor!" Bert shouted. "How do we know this friend of his was there?"
"You met him, remember, you idiot?!" Cyril shouted. "He was there when you left for the baseball game!"
"Oh yeah," Bert said.
"Objection overruled," Judge Owlsen said. "Please continue, Mr. Sneer."
"Well, anyway," Cyril said. "After Cedric and those raccoons left, I went to my office to get some work done, and the Pigs were with me, at least up until eight, when I told them to go check out this company. Sofa Girl was feeding Forest, and I don't recall what Silas was doing. Anyway, it was around nine o' clock when I started hearing some commotion. Forest was crying, and there was all this banging and crashing going on. I heard Sofa Girl scream, so I went to see what in the world was happening, because I couldn't get any work done. I walked into another room, and I saw Sofa Girl on the floor, and Silas leaning over her, holding a baseball bat, and Sofa Girl had all these bruises all over her. I've known Silas since high school, and he was always used to getting everything he wanted, and when he couldn't have what he wanted he'd tend to lash out, so I figured that's what was happening here. I think Silas was surprised to see me standing there, and was unprepared for anything. So I picked up the baseball bat, and just told him that if he didn't get out of there, I'd hit him with it."
"Did you hit him with it?" Wilbur asked.
"No," Cyril said. "I knocked a vase off the table with it to prove my point. That scared Silas off, and he just ran. I have reason to believe he left town, but I'm not sure. Anyway, after he left, I started to check and see if Sofa Girl was all right, because she was practically in hysterics, and that's when Cedric came in, and he saw me holding the baseball bat, leaning over Sofa Girl."
"Were there any other witnesses?"
"No, just me, Silas, and Sofa Girl. And perhaps Forest, but he can't tell you what happened. He's only a baby."
"That is all."
Cyril stepped down from the witness stand, and glared at Bert. Bert glared at him right back. Judge Owlsen banged his gavel on the bench.
"Court will recess for one hour while the jury reaches their verdict," he said, banging the gavel again.
Everyone stood up and started to leave the courtroom. Wilbur and Cyril had a conference about what was going to happen.
"Well, how does it look?" he asked.
"Unfortunately, not good," Wilbur said. "Your reputation for being heartless may be the cause of this, especially with that testimony given by the Pigs. That, and you didn't exactly see this Silas character attack Sophia."
"So you're saying that I might end up being found guilty."
"Unfortunately, yes. But there's absolutely nothing I can do about it."
Cyril groaned. An hour later, everyone returned to the courtroom, ready for the verdict.
"Has the jury reached a verdict?" Judge Owlsen asked.
"We have, your honor," the head of the jury said, standing up. "We find the defendant guilt . . . . ."
"Wait!" someone cried from the doorway. Everyone turned around and saw Sophia running to the front of the courtroom.
"Sophia!" Cedric shouted, surprised. "What are you doing here?"
"I have to testify," Sophia said. "I'm the only one who knows what really happened that night."
"But the jury was just about to . . . ." Bert started.
"It can wait," Judge Owlsen said. "In light of this, I am willing to listen to the young lady's story. The court will disregard the jury's former verdict."
The head of the jury sat down. Sophia approached the witness stand, nervously. The bailiff walked over to her.
"Do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and stuff like that there?" he asked.
"I do," Sophia said, and she said down.
Both Sophia and Cyril took a breath. They were nervous as anything, Cyril especially. After all, it was Sophia's testimony that would decide the case. Would she be able to keep him out of jail?