Chapter Four: Bugs Fakes a Leg

The next day, Bugs Bunny returned to the Betty Rubble Center to get his cast checked out. The doctor, who was a regular human doctor, was washing his hands. Bugs, sitting on the cold table with his cast, said, "So, what's da diagnosis, doc? Do I still need to wait for my leg to be better?"

"Actually, Bugs," the doctor began, "you're ready to get your cast off TODAY!"

Bugs was surprised. "You mean… I'm healed?"

The doctor explained, "Yep. Minor stress fractures only take a very short time to heal. You can go back to your normal life."

"Yippee!" Bugs cheered. But then he thought a bit. He got an idea… a BAD idea. "Eh, Doc," he asked, "can I keep dis cast once it's removed, you know, as a souvenir?"

…

Later, back at Wile E's house, Bugs Bunny told Daffy his idea. "I'm gonna add hinges to dis cast, and wear it whenever I talk about Pixar or dose new cartoons, to show people what dey did to me!"

"COOL!" Daffy was impressed. Then he added, "plus, Oscar night is tonight."

"Oh, Oscar…" Bugs sighed.

Wile E. Coyote entered the living room. "What are you talking about?"

"Da Oscars are coming soon!" Bugs said excitedly.

"Yes, but there's a problem," Daffy noted. "I got an anonymous tip that 'CARS' is gonna win!"

"NOT CARS!" Bugs was shocked.

"I'm pretty sure 'Cars' will win," Wile E. told his friends. "Remember what I said? Even though people have been saying the plot was weak, the idea has been done already, and other stuff like that, the reason it will win the Oscar is because IT'S A PIXAR MOVIE! Besides, I've already bet $25 on a friend that 'Cars' will win."

Daffy said, "That's great! Everyone will be congratulating Pixar, even if they didn't particularly LIKE the film, and forgetting about us!"

"Now to finish my secret weapon!" Bugs said, and ran into the basement.

…

The next morning, the sky was gray and dark. Ominous storm clouds floated in the sky, blocking out the sun. But inside the house of Wile E. Coyote…

"FINALLY!" Daffy shrieked.

"What is it?" Wile E. and Bugs were in suspense.

Daffy held up the newspaper in delight. " 'CARS' DIDN'T WIN THE OSCAR!"

"YIPPEE!" Bugs shouted happily.

The coyote agreed, "It's about time. Unfortunately, I lost the bet with my friend. Now I have to pay him $25."

Daffy laughed. "So what? It looks like Pixar's finally starting to slip in popularity!"

Bugs then thought. "Now what can I do? I want to perform my secret weapon to dose anti-Looney Tunes folks!"

Wile E. Coyote then noted, "We have a THIRD rival now… Spongebob Squarepants. He reigns supreme as the best cartoon on TV."

Bugs Bunny gasped in horror. "NOT SPONGEBOB!"

Daffy got a terrible idea. "Hey, let's kill him," he told Bugs.

"NO!" the coyote shouted. "No killing! That's a terrible idea!"

Daffy argued, "But YOU always try to kill the Road Runner!"

Wile E. said, "That's different, and besides… let's change the subject, OK? I heard rumors about this upcoming 'Cartoon Cartoon Network' channel."

"What's it about?" Daffy asked nervously.

"It's going to be launched next year. It will be a digital cable channel full of CN-original programming, both old and new. This could mean that they might remove all the new stuff off of Boomerang!"

Bugs smiled and added, "Dat's good to know."

The coyote added, "Plus, there's even more good news. Loonatics Unleashed might be canceled!"

"WHOOPEE!" Bugs and Daffy shouted in unison! "THAT'S GOOD NEWS!"

"Maybe they'll pay more attention to US than those knock-offs!" Daffy said with glee.

"Yeah!" Bugs laughed. "Also, I'm gonna try and pay a visit to da Cartoon Network boss, while I…" he whispered the rest of the plan to Daffy, whom smiled evilly.

"Here we go again," Wile E. Coyote shrugged.