(Opening credits. Cut to the exterior of the Evil Alliance as a snow-machine is blowing out fake snow, cut inside as all the employees and Craig (except Huck) are standing up in Craig's office.)
James: Isn't nice to have the warm Christmas spirit...
Craig: There's fake snow outside...
James: Because it doesn't snow in Atlanta Craig.
Craig: Hey...since it's summer and all, does that mean the snow's going to melt?
James: Probably.
(A gun shot goes through the roof.)
Bill: What the Hell was that?
(Huck (dressed up as Santa Claus and has a bottle of beer in old hand) falls in the gun shot hole and falls on top of Craig.)
Bill: How come Huck is Santa Claus this year?
James: Because it's his first year in the Evil Alliance and um...yeah.
Bill: Hey...how come a lot of Hanna-Barbara actors are coming to Atlanta?
James: Probably trying to get a low profile.
Craig: Nice to see you Huck.
Huck: (drunk) What?
(Chris walks in, in an elf outfit.)
Chris: This makes me look like a fag.
(Huck stands up and wobbles.)
Huck: (drunk) It makes you look like a what...cigarette?
James: Huck, are you drunk?
Huck: (drunk) Maybe...all I know is, I like elves.
Ross: Hey...should Santas be drunk?
Huck: (drunk) Yes they should...you know why?
(Huck grabs a shotgun and aims it at Ross.)
Huck: (drunk) Because I'll kill you.
Chris: What...maybe James should be Santa this year.
James: Huck...calm down.
Huck: (drunk) You don't tell me to calm down!
James: Listen you don't really know what you're saying!
Huck: (drunk) Really...I don't know what I'm saying?
James: Yes.
(Craig stands up.)
Craig: Well...it's time for everyone's Christmas Bonuses.
Huck: (drunk) That's the reason I live...for the money!
Craig: Here's the bonus.
(Craig hands Huck a toy train.)
Craig: Enjoy it.
Huck: (drunk) What the (BLEEP) is this for?
Craig: Your kids.
Huck: (drunk) Yeah it'll be useful...IF I HAD (BLEEP)ING KIDS!
James: We picked you to be Santa Claus this year so you can feel a bit more comfortable...
Huck: (drunk) This is what I saying to your toy train!
(Huck shoots Craig.)
James: OH MY GOD!
Chris: Can't we just hand out the presents?
Huck: (drunk) Yeah...my gun!
Ross: Why did you shoot the boss for?
Huck: (drunk) A (BLEEP)ing toy train! A (BLEEP)ing toy train! WHAT KIND OF (BLEEP)ING CHRISTMAS BONUS IS THAT!
Bill: Maybe, it'll be better if we just cut our losses and move on...
(Bill gets shot by Huck.)
James: Okay Huck, as your superior I'll have to fire you.
Huck: (drunk) I don't really see why you HAD to have me as an agent anyway! You see why...I don't see why? Do you still see why?
James: Because we had to hire you because we were running out of agents so...
Huck: (drunk) Listen, I don't care.
James: ...we had to hire you because we had a shortage of agents.
Huck: (drunk) HALLE (BLEEP)ING LUIAH!
James: I didn't even know you were an alcoholic.
Huck: (drunk) WELL (BLEEP)YOU THEN, HUH!
(Huck grabs his shotgun and aims it at James' head. Dramatic sting.)
James: You wouldn't dare!
Huck: (drunk) Dare what?
James: Just don't dare!
Huck: (drunk) Dare what dare?
James: You know what I mean.
(Pause.)
Huck: (drunk) Um...uh...um.
Ross: Listen...we just have to...settle this through.
Huck: (drunk) OH (BLEEP) YOU!
(Huck shoots Ross.)
James: Why are you acting like this?
Huck: (drunk) Because I hate Christmas!
James: IT'S THE HAPPIEST TIME OF THE YEAR!
Huck: (drunk) Yeah...if you're in Disneyland.
Chris: So...are we going to hand out the presents out...or what?
Huck: (drunk) They will be no presents this year!
Chris: What? But we had a secret Santa and…..
Huck: (drunk) Listen, I'd sell my soul to get those presents back, but unless Satan just appears out of nowhere and gives us the presents in the exchange for my soul then fine.
(God appears in the puff of smoke.)
God: That can be arranged.
James: OH MY GOD, IT'S GOD!
God: Huck, if you give me your soul I will give you and your co-workers the presents you so desire.
Chris: He said he'd sell his soul to SATAN, since when did God get people's souls?
God: Since Bizarro Satan got him out of a (BLEEP)ing job.
James: Bizarro Satan……….what, what about normal Satan?
(Huck vibrates as his eyes turn red and wings pop up and turns into Satan.)
Satan: I AM SATAN!
God: Since Satan possessed Huck last week.
James: No, last week Huck killed his brother Chuck.
God: You don't know anything, I'm God!
Chris: You've made that painstakingly clear now.
(Nerdy Intern walks in with a carton of coffee.)
Nerdy Intern: Who ordered the coffee?
(Satan breathes fire all over the Nerdy Intern as he jumps up and down.)
Nerdy Intern: I'M ON FIRE! HELP ME! I'M ON FIRE!
(Chris quickly looks for something, and grabs a can of gasoline and pours it all over Nerdy Intern as the fire erupts, making him explode.)
James: (covered in Nerdy Intern's blood) Ugh, gross! That nerdy intern's blood.
Satan: Blood is my nectar!
(Satan grabs a knife and stabs Chris as his blood sprays into Satan's mouth as a Huckbot wobbles in.)
Huckbot: I am Huckbot! I am Huckbot!
God: What the (BLEEP)!
James: Okay, this is getting crazy, I'm getting outta here!
(James tries to open the door but is unsuccessful.)
James: What the Hell?
Satan: I WANT MORE BLOOD!
God: Who wants chicken's blood!
Satan: Me!
(God grabs a pipe and smacks Satan over the head with it. Silence.)
Huckbot: (shaking around, sailor music starts) Port and Starboard will crawl, terry ho, ho! Blow the man down
James: Shut up!
Huckbot: (starts shaking around and sailor music stops) Access denied.
God: James, grab the knife and stab Satan with it and look for his soul.
James: How do you know my name?
God: I'm (BLEEP)ing God, what else?
James: Well, okay………why don't you grab the knife and stab him and look for Huck's soul.
God: Because I'm holding the knife you idiot!
James: Wow……….God called me an idiot.
God: What are you, a (BLEEP)ing fag suck-up?
James: For God, you sure ain't what I thought you would be from the bible.
God: That bible got it all wrong, that damn Dan Brown!
James: Dan Brown? The author of "The Da Vinci Code"?
God: What…….that isn't the bible?
James: No.
God: What about that book talking about Jesus and what not?
James: Yeah, that's the bible.
God: Okay……
Huckbot: I am…..Huckbot.
James: So?
Huckbot: Your wish is my command.
James: The bible is right….
God: Huckbot, grab the knife in Satan's hand and stab him in the stomach.
Huckbot: Yes, sir.
(Huckbot grabs the knife from Satan and stabs him in the stomach as blood sprays out.)
God: You hit an artery!
James: I don't even know why we're celebrating Christmas in Summer anyway.
God: Because the……….apocalypse is coming!
(Dramatic sting.)
James: No, I don't think that's the reason…..
(Huck explodes out of Satan's stomach and lands on Huckbot as Huckbot starts shaking around.)
James: Oh look, Huck's out.
God: Isn't there more employees than this?
James: There are all on summer vacation.
(Satan awakens.)
Satan: Oh man, what the Hell?
Huck: Who built this robot that resembles me!
(A mummy walks in.)
Mummy: I did because after all these….
(Huck grabs his shotgun and shoots the Mummy.)
James: Why did you kill that Mummy for?
Huck: That sicko built a robot version of me.
Huckbot: (BLEEP)! (BLEEP)! (BLEEP)!
Huck: A robot version of me that bleeps itself.
Satan: What are you doing here God?
God: Wait a minute, I recognize that voice…
(God pulls off Satan's mask revealing it's Santa Claus. Dramatic sting.)
James: Santa Claus!
Huck: What a twist!
(A paparazzi pops up.)
Paparazzi: Hot scoop!
(Paparazzi takes a photo and bobs down.)
Santa Claus: Okay, I dressed up as Satan!
James: But you possessed Huck?
Santa Claus: Yeah…
James: While dressed up as Satan?
Santa Claus: Yeah.
James: I didn't even know you were evil….
Santa Claus: I am, read the bible.
James: But you're not mentioned on the bible!
Santa Claus: I am, read closer!
God: That's what I keep telling him!
James: Well excuse me!
Huck: If Santa Claus is Satan, who's Santa Claus?
Santa Claus: I am?
James: Okay, now where's the real Satan?
Santa Claus: There is no Satan, there's a Bizarro Satan.
James: What……..this doesn't make sense!
Huck: Of course it does.
(Huck slides off the Huckbot as the Huckbot grabs a shotgun and starts shooting wildly up in the air.)
James: What the Hell is going on?
Huckbot: Huckbot! Huckbot away!
(Huckbot flies through the roof.)
James: Where's a ladder, I'm getting out of here….
(James starts walking off.)
James: ……….worst day of my life.
(James walks off completely.)
Huck: He seemed nice.
God: Who? James?
Huck: No…….that Huckbot.
Santa Claus: Didn't seem like such a bad guy now didn't he?
Huck: Nope.
God: Yep, I usually don't allow robots in heaven because they don't have souls, but I'll allow him.
Huck: And me?
God: You……you…….I don't usually allow dogs either because they have no souls, but….I'll allow you too.
Huck: Yes!
Santa Claus: What about me?
God: You can go to Heaven too!
Santa Claus & Huck: Yes!
God: In fact, everyone in this room is going to Heaven!
(James grabs a ladder and starts walking back in.)
James: Even me?
God: No, you're going to Hell.
James: Why me? Huck's the one who's been shooting everyone in EVERY episode of this damn series, his unapologetic, he doesn't care about anyone else but himself, his a self-centered jerk that doesn't deserve to have a second season….
(Huck gets up and shoots up into the air. Dramatic sting, brief pause.)
Huck: Oh boo-hoo! Look at me, I'm some nerd who is watching these episodic events in this particularly serial, or series, year! I'm only watching this so I can complain about it so I can bitch and moan it's taking up space on MY precious [adult swim, er, life of watching episodic events! If you don't like it, stop (BLEEP)ing watching this (BLEEP)ing events and ratings, er, uh…my reputation will go down I'll be cancelled, er, I meant fired and I'll go away! YOU STUPID PEOPLE HAVE NOTHING TO DO BUT WATCH ELEVEN MINUTE EPISODIC EVENTS JUST SO YOU CAN BITCH AND MOAN ABOUT IT ON YOUR PRECIOUS MESSAGEBOARDS, YOUR CLUBS, YOUR STUPID BLOGS! Fine, you do that, waste your (BLEEP)ing life, fine you don't like I'm basically like person in this crazy [adult swim I call life, boo-hoo! Cry us a river, because your opinions don't matter! I tell you what (BLEEP)ing matters, ratings. So if you don't like it, stop watching, thus you'll stop (BLEEP)ing bitching and moaning, then actual people who like witnessing my little escapades week-by-week won't that to listen to your stupid complaints and can witness these events in (BLEEP)ing peace! That counts for all those other people who bitch and moan about events in life or as some nerdy nerd nerds like to call, it [adult swim. Fact is James, no one cares about your opinions, there will be a second season of events, because enough people are witnessing this events, so you have to get used to flicking around for eleven minutes to actually witness an event you actually want to witness, instead of wasting your time and everyone's else's time bitching and moaning on the message boards and those people's time won't be wasted. I don't care that you don't like these events, but that fact that week by week, day by day, minute by minute, second by second, (BLEEP)ing event by event is when I come in. James, (BLEEP) you, go watch (BLEEP)ing anime you (BLEEP)ing nerds!
(Dramatic sting, brief pause. Huck walks off.)
God: Whoa, I did not see that coming, did you?
(End credits.)