Chapter Eight

Baby Buggy Wayan OR Beaten by a Rat

Bugs Bunny was talking on a pay phone. He was saying, "OK, dat sounds good! I see… uh-huh… well, thank you for telling me da news! See ya!" He hung up and ran over to Daffy and Wile E. "Guess what?" he told them. "Baby Face Finster is FINALLY going to sue dose Wayans!"

"FINALLY!" Daffy shouted in delight.

Wile E. smiled and said, "Cool! Maybe things are starting to look up again."

Daffy then said, "Well, let's go see Sylvester!"

They went over to his apartment and rang the bell. It was actually a combination of bells, buzzers, tones and whistles! "Apartments always have crappy doorbells," Bugs noted.

The door opened, and Sylvester answered. "I need to replace that door buzzer," he was saying to himself, until he saw the three toons. "Oh, hiya Daffy, Bugs, Wile E! What are you all doing here?"

"We're having hard times!" Daffy whined. "We've been canceled from TV, and Pixar's dominating the animation market again! The Cartoon Network boss thinks we're bad guys!"

"But on the lighter side," the coyote added, "Sander Schwartz has left Warner Bros. Animation, and we might have the stars of 'Little Man' sued for plagiarizing Bugs Bunny's original 'Baby Buggy Bunny.'"

"That's cool," Sylvester said. "I'm going to have my apartment cleaned or cockroaches. They help around the house and do chores, but they're starting to become a nuisance."

Before Sylvester could ask, Daffy answered, "Sure, Sylv, you can stay at Wile E.'s place for that time."

…

Back at Wile E.'s house, the doorbell rang. The coyote went to answer it. But when he opened the door, he was shocked to see a gigantic flying saucer parked right in front of his house! Standing right at the porch was Marvin the Martian with an annoyed expression. "You are probably wondering why I am here," the alien said.

"Why are you here, Marvin?" Wile E. asked.

Bugs growled, "Grr, Marvin da Martian! Dat name makes my blood boil!" He ran over to the door with a surly-looking expression.

Marvin told the rabbit, "You know, Earth rabbit, we should end this little feud we have against each other. It will not turn out good in the end with your bad attitude like this."

Bugs Bunny then forced a big, phony smile that looked really awkward and had his eyes closed. Then he walked into a closet with his eyes wide open, and he aimed an ACME Straitjacket Bazooka at Marvin, and fired at him. The rabbit still had the phony smile. Then as he was about to munch on a carrot, Marvin warned him, "You're only kidding yourself, bucko!"

Helping untie the Martian, Wile E. asked him, "So why are you here for?"

"I just wanted you to know that WB is not releasing ANY of my films to DVD!"

Daffy countered, "But there's a couple of your cartoons on the first Golden Collection."

Marvin then added, "But not any of the others."

"Maybe it's because you're sort of obscure, like those Goofy Gophers, as well as Hubie and Bertie and Charlie Dog and Merlin the Magic Mouse," Wile E. suggested.

"Hmm, yes…" Marvin agreed. "Well, I shall go over to Warner Bros. and complain myself!" He went back to this spaceship and took off with a loud whooshing sound.

The coyote ran after, shouting, "Wait! Don't go there!" But then he stopped halfway and went back to his place. "Well, 'Ratatouille' has made past the $150,000,000 point in box-office."

"Grrrr! Pixar should have something BAD happen to it!" Daffy bitterly said.

"But there could be hope for the 2-D animation market," Wile E. continued. "'The Simpsons Movie' is doing very well at box-office."

Bugs then countered, "Yes, but dat's da SIMPSONS, not us! Dey've been on TV for almost twenty years, and WE'VE been around longer!"

Sylvester added, "Right. Marvin made a cameo on an episode of the Simpsons, as he told me."

"Besides, 'Family Guy' is more popular nowadays," Bugs added. "Remember when you and Elmer and I made cameos on dat show?"

"Yes," the coyote noted. "Even though I had my voice dubbed over for it. Then there was the 'Robot Chicken' segment you and Daffy co-starred in."

Daffy laughed. "Oh yeah! How could I forget, 'B. Rabbit?" He elbowed Bugs jokingly.

The rabbit replied, "You know I hate dat nickname!"

Wile E. then announced, "Well, since I am mostly no longer needed as an actor, I think I'll become a painter!"

"You mean dat you're just gonna paint houses?" Bugs asked in shock.

"No," the coyote explained. "I mean I'm going to paint pictures for art galleries and stuff like that. You know, an artist."

Daffy asked, "But why an artist?"

He told Daffy, "You've seen my artwork before. Remember how I'd paint those fake backgrounds and tunnels that would turn real, and then phony again? I found an agent to help me with this! Besides, I also set up a studio in my spare room."

Sylvester smiled. "Cool, but I'm gonna get some grub first." He walked over to the refrigerator, opened it up, but only found an empty bottle of wine, half an apple and a really rotten sandwich. The cat fell over. "You've got nothing to eat here, coyote!"

"I know," Wile E. said. "Daffy and Bugs have been eating quite a bit. But I will be going to the supermarket soon. Let me show you guys my new art studio."

…

So Wile E. Coyote showed his friends his new art room. Inside, the walls were painted white, and there was a paint-splattered worktable, while some canvases were spread against one wall and some cans held paintbrushes. An easel was also set up, and there were some floor lamps aimed at one corner.

"That corner there is in case I paint a portrait," Wile E. told his friends. "It's not much, but it's a start."

"That's pretty cool," Daffy said. "You never know when it can come in handy!" He slyly winked to Bugs, and they both softly chuckled.