Chapter 42

"Will you put me down?" Sandy asked, giggling when Paul carried her to the door the day she came home from the hospital. "Come on; this isn't the time to be a total doofus in front of the family."

"Why not? I have a license now," he joked. "And I thought the guy was supposed to carry the bride across the threshold."

"You should have thought of this when we moved into the house last week."

"It's more appropriate for today."

Paul then kicked open the door. "Look what I have, everyone!" he announced.

"Sandra!" Marie cried cheerfully. "It is so good to have you home!"

"Gee, Paul, put Mom down, huh? She just had her appendix out a few days ago; were you raised by wolves?" Tyler asked, worried, then looked at Ana. "Sorry, Miz Sanchez-Garcia."

"That's quite all right; sometimes I have to wonder if he's half wolf myself," Ana replied with a chuckle.

¡"Mamá"! Paul exclaimed, putting Sandy down gently.

"It's quite all right, everybody," Sandy replied. "I think I will sit down for a bit, though."

"You really should, especially after you had your appendix out and being pregnant too," Tyler said.

"And I totally agree," Paul added. "I can take it from here."

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Paul had kept busy all afternoon, when he wasn't getting his fingers smacked while attempting to be the "official taster" of all the delicacies and chased from the kitchen, he was doting on Sandy; bringing her anything she wanted or needed, giving everyone the "grand tour" of the house, letting the kids watch some of his and Spanky's matches on the new flat screen TV (that Sandy had initially complained about him getting, being they should be thinking about shopping for baby furniture soon), putting on a wrestling "demonstration" for the other guys (to Sandy's chagrin, which made him finally stop), and basically making sure everyone else was having a good time.

Spanky eyed a chair that Andy had just abandoned.

"Dibs!" he exclaimed, plopping down.

"Perhaps you didn't get the memo that this is my house," Paul said. "There's no dibs here."

"Ourhouse," Sandy corrected from where she still sat.

"Right," he nodded. "Our house. Sorry, baby."

"And stop picking on Spanky. He did come all the way up here at practically the last minute to be at our wedding. How many true friends would do that?"

Spanky crossed is eyes and stuck his tongue out at Paul. "Looks like your wife just vetoed you, dude. What are you going to do about it?"

"Get the hell out of my chair!" Paul bellowed, attempting wrestle Spanky out of the chair, but having no success in budging him as Spanky laughed hysterically.

"God, Paul, you're worse than the kids. Are you going to pull that on Tyler all the time too?"

"If he messes with my favorite chair, absolutely." He looked at Spanky again. "Out."

"Bite me." Spanky stuck out his tongue.

Sandy shook head. "You are pathetic, Paul."

As if he'd gotten an idea, Paul stared at his tag partner and best friend before breaking out into a evil grin.

"Why are you staring at me like that? No offense, man, but you're creeping me out."

"Since you insist on being a smart ass, we're going to have to share." Paul jumped on his lap, throwing his arms around Spanky.

"Wow, and I thought you and Sandy made a cute couple," Edie teased as she and Sandy began to laugh.

"Get your bony ass off of me!" Spanky yelled at Paul, giving him a shove.

"Aw, baby, I thought you really cared," Paul teased and puckered up, making Edie and Sandy laugh even harder.

"If you two start kissing, me and Tyler are going to barf," Janice said. "And shouldn't you be on your bride's lap instead of your best man's?"

"That's the normal thing, Jan," Tyler nodded. "But that might not be a good idea right now either, since Mom had her operation."

"Yeah, you're right. Still, those two are making me sick. Ewww."

"Nah, they're just goofing off," Tyler reassured his friend.

"I think I'm going to need a pain pill anyway from laughing so hard," Sandy added. "Only these two could pull off such shenanigans."

"I'll get you one, Mom," Tyler volunteered.

"Get the fuck off of me, dude!" Spanky yelled, giving Paul a shove that sent him to the floor as Paul laughed hysterically. "And some wonder why people think we're a couple of fags? Jesus Christ, Paul. You aren't even my type."

"San," Paul said to her in a mock whine. "Spanky doesn't love me anymore."

"Don't worry, sweetheart," Sandy replied, trying not to laugh again. "I still do."

"Good, then you can sit on my lap and we'll discuss the first thing that pops up."

"Paul! Our mothers are here; will you cool it?" Sandy felt herself blushing.

"What? I was just goofing around with you."

"No offense, Ty," Janice said. "but sometimes your stepfather can be a sick freak."

Tyler looked back at Janice as he gave Sandy a bottle of water and a pain pill. "And you just figured that out now?"