NextHeaven: Yes, I am alive...you all thought I had died right? Well, first of, I have some apologies to make, the main one being since I haven't updated for soooo long and also for not putting up a note or anything to say this story was discontinued. Excuses? Well to be honest, I have none, except lack of time and laziness (and those don't really count as excuses, do they?). Anyway, I wrote most of this chapter around the time when I finished chapter 17-18, so it's been lying around for some time and recently I have made a few additions and corrections. I'm going to try and update this till the end (this was my first fanfic and I am determined to finish it...even if it takes me untill I am an old withered woman!), although updates will be slow, so do don't get excited ;) I also want to thank all those who have reviewed and especially 191026 for her wonderful illustration of the lemon chapter :) Enjoy.

Chapter 20

It had been decided that Calintz and his comrades would seek out the Water Shard, while Agreian would go after the Celestial Shard in Epentar. Calintz disliked the idea of letting his best friend go alone to the capital of Yason-Roven, however, Agreian was insistent.

"Calintz, it is out of my weakness that it has fallen into their hands, and thus, my duty to retrieve it,"

The Captain of the Tears of Blood looked into his eyes, frowning.

"You don't think I can handle it, do you?" Agreian said sarcastically.

"I'm worried, that's all. But…I can empathize with you're decision, I would do the same, I guess,"

"I knew you would understand,"

Calintz sighed. He doubted Agreian could handle the Yason alone, even if he sneaked his way in, he would surely be caught eventually. But, he knew, he must have faith in him. Agreian had done many things, many honourable and brave deeds that he secretly envied. True, he had not fought in such battles as Calintz had and not witnessed the battlefield in all it's bloody glory, however, he was clever and that intelligence was his saving grace.

"Mano, do not worry for me…" he said softly, stroking a tender hand across Calintz's pallid cheekbone. The captain nodded.

"I believe in you so don't mess up," he said with a smirk. The general shot him a mordant glance then quickly leaned in for a brief moment so their lips met.

"I'm glad you are back…" he whispered, then turned to go on his way. Calintz stood watching as the tall, figure in black disappeared into the forest, in the direction of Yason-Roven.

Azel hadn't been able to sleep the night before and now he doubted he would be able to sleep for many nights to come. He now wished he had never taken that night time stroll in the woods, never seen what he had. But, he couldn't change the past could he? He had noticed Calintz and the General were not present and his curiosity had gotten the better of him as he had stumbled into the dark forest. It had not been long before he had come across the two he sought, doing more than he had thought to find. At first it looked like a fight, but then obviously transpired into something more intimate. So it was true, he thought, as he watched the two men fight for domination, that the Captain really was…close to General Agreian. His fears were confirmed and a wave of melancholy seemed to engulf him as their moans of pleasure drifted through the forest. He didn't want to watch or remain any longer, but somehow his legs would not obey his command to move. His eyes had widened with each caress and gasp, strained to see more from his hidden vantage point. It was only when the two men had collapsed upon each other and the forest returned to silence that he realised what he was doing and promptly ran back to the camp with the realisation that something was not quite right in his lower regions.

"Azel? You look dazed, do you feel well?" he was startled out of his reminiscence by the sound of a soft male voice. The last voice he wanted to hear right now. He spun around to face the Captain, a flush quickly igniting his face.

"Uh-mm-yeah-I mean no- I mean yeah….sorry…" he stuttered trying his best to avoid eye contact. The Captain regarded him with curiosity, scratching his chin with one slender finger.

"You look hot, perhaps you have a fever," he said, raising the back of his hand against Azel's forehead. This only caused the teenager to grow even more beetroot. He quickly stumbled back, out of Calintz's touch.

"I'm fine, Captain, really!" he said quickly. Calintz looked at him a moment longer then shrugged.

"Alright, well let's get going, Eonis is already waiting,"

After searching Pnosen Library for any clues as to where the other shards may be found, Calintz and his team found themselves heading towards the floating islands of Bayrux.

"So, the Water shard is really here, you think?" Eonis asked as they sat around the table at the inn. Calintz picked at the few shreds of dried meat and bread on his plate, looking at them half-heartedly.

"We have no other leads," he said. Eonis nodded thoughtfully. Azel stood in the corner of the room, staring at the bookshelf as if it was the most fascinating thing of the century.

"What's the matter with you?" Eonis asked. He turned around, not daring to meet her gaze.

"I'm just tired, I think I'm going to head off to bed," at that he left the room and ascended the flight of stairs to the second floor where the rooms were located.

"He's been acting strangely recently," she said.

"He has?"

"You mean to tell me you haven't even noticed?"

"Sorry, my minds just been on other things,"

"You're mind's always on other things, Calintz," she smiled at him, half in frustration, half in humour.

That night Calintz found it hard to sleep. He wasn't used to the high altitudes of the islands and the constant dry heat. However, it wasn't only that which prevented him from his deserved sleep. Many thoughts and fears engulfed him, predominantly orientated around Agreian. Damn, I should never have let him go alone…God only knows what they'll do to him if they catch him…And…what would I do if he was gone…? It wasn't a thought he wished to contemplate at that particular moment, however, it was like an impending dread, something you knew would catch up to you sooner or later.

In the end, he gave up attempting to sleep. It seemed sleep had long since deserted him. He recalled the last time he had actually slept. He blushed slightly remembering why he had been so tired. But no, thinking of that would only insinuate other thoughts which would be far more painful. He shook his head, letting his snow-white hair fall over his face momentarily. The moonlight was far brighter here than it was on the land, being that the Islands were so high up and the sky so clear. He decided to take it to his advantage and have a stroll outside.

Bayrux at night was one of the most beautiful things Calintz had ever seen. Darkness descended all around him, the stillness consuming him. He always expected it to be windy being so high up, but there wasn't even a whisper of a breeze. The cherry blossoms stood like statues, unmoving like the darkness. He wandered the small path towards the edge of the island he was on. It was then he noticed Azel sitting on an out jutting rock, one knee pulled to his chest, his head bowed down. Calintz moved closer, trying to make out what he was doing out so late at night. Azel wasn't the type not to sleep, he always seemed to fall asleep before Calintz if they ever shared a room. He approached the boy slowly as not to startle him and knelt down beside him.

"Azel?" he whispered. The teenager jumped, nearly falling of his perch.

"Ah! C-Captain!" he yelled, a hand over his chest. "Y-you scared me!"

"I apologize. I attempted to be quite as to not disturb you, however, it seems I did the opposite…"

Azel looked down again, brushing a hand nervously through his hair.

"Why are you out here at this time?" Caltinz asked, sitting down beside the young man.

"I don't know…"

"You don't know? You've been acting strangely lately, Azel. I don't know what it is, but if it's keeping you from sleep then it will affect your performance in battle and that's a very dangerous thing,"

"I know…" Azel said, his eyes catching the moonlight as he stared into the night's sky. Calintz was unsure what to do. He wanted to ask further but didn't want to upset the boy by prying. He had known Azel long enough to work out if the boy wanted to tell him something, he would. But somehow, Calintz got the feeling that Azel did want to say something to him, however, whatever it was seemed to be difficult for him to put into words. Calintz sighed, emotions had never been his strong point, especially talking about them.

"Look…Whatever it is that's bothering you, I'll listen. I won't tell anyone what you say to me, it'll be completely between you and I," he said, hoping it would coax the teenager to explain to him what was wrong. He glanced at Azel and saw that the boy was picking at his fingernails nervously. He turned to Calintz and there was something in his eyes that frightened the white haired captain. He wasn't sure why; was it an emotion he hadn't seen before? No, the opposite. It was an emotion he had seen within many people's eyes, especially Agreian's: Lust.

Azel reached out a hand and tentatively touched Calintz's cheek. He can't…no way…But it was true and it hit the young captain like a ton of bricks. And with this realization came the fact that he should have noticed it earlier, after all, thinking about it now, it seemed blindingly obvious.

"Azel…?" Calintz whispered, unsure if he should stay or run as fast as he could back to the inn.

"...Captain…?" the boy replied, his hand still on his captain's cheek. Calintz quickly pulled away, shaking his head faintly.

"I'm sorry Azel, but this isn't going to work," he said meeting the boy's eyes with a stern gaze.

"W-why not?"

"Because…" What should he say? That he didn't find Azel attractive? The boy was pretty but he could never imagine them having a relationship in that sort of a way. It wasn't right.

"Because you and General Agreian are –"

"What?!" Calintz snapped. How the hell did he know?

"I saw you!" the boy blurted out, immediately clapping a hand to his mouth as if he could reverse time and bring the words back from whence they came. Calintz felt a tinge of pink rising upon his cheeks and he was glad for the darkness to conceal it. He didn't know what to say. At first the fear that Azel would tell others sprang to his mind, then he realised, the boy would be too embarrassed to speak of it. If it took this much for him to say it to his best friend and mentor, then it would be near impossible for him to say it to anyone else.

"Whatever happens between the General and I is my own business, understand?" he said, surprised at how harsh he sounded. The boy looked to the ground, his expression hidden. Calintz took it as his que to leave. However, as soon as he tried to get to his feet Azel grabbed him, causing him to lose his balance and topple to the ground. Before he knew what was happening the teenager was on top of him, his mouth clamped around his own in a desperate attempt at a kiss. For a few moments Calintz lay there dazed, then his brain took over, commanding his body to move. Although Azel was strong, Calintz could better him in any fight and quickly reversed their position, pinning the boy's arms to the ground.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" he shouted, anger rising within him. He wanted to punch him there and then, but obviously that wouldn't be a good idea as evidence of their fight would show the next morning. Azel seemed to shrink beneath him, the possessive rage diminishing as fast as it had ignited. Calintz let him go and finally got to his feet, staring down at the cowering and embarrassed teenager.

"I'm going to forget this ever happened," he said, grabbing one of Azel's arms and pulling him into a sitting position. He turned to go back to the inn. "Get some rest," he said before leaving the boy still sitting on the ground.

Back in the inn, Calintz still could not sleep. His idea that a nightly stroll would alleviate his thoughts had now only made them worse and added more worry to them. Azel's feelings could be a problem, especially if he twisted them in a way that would make others favour him. He could use his knowledge of his and Agreian's relationship against him…but why would he do that? What reason would he have? No…it was best not to think anymore of this. Perhaps he would come to his senses and apologize in the morning. He needed to forget about it for now, he had enough problems as it were for the moment.