The next morning dawned brightly, but I never would have known if the curtains had not been thrown apart so quickly, allowing the sun to seep through the window and hit my eyes so hard I thought I'd been slapped. I opened them reluctantly, Legolas' figure greeting them.
"What in all Arda are you doing, Greenleaf?" I muttered sleepily.
"Waking you up, stupid," he replied, an all-too-familiar grin on his face.
"Go bother someone else."
"I've already awoken Aragorn and Malian!"
"What about Kaethe?" Legolas scowled at the question.
"She's not as much fun to annoy," he admitted, the grin not disappearing from his cheeky little face. I raised one eyebrow in question, but he explained no further. Instead, he jumped on the bed like a cat onto a table and began nuzzling me with his nose.
"Honestly, Greenleaf, if you were anyone else I'd cut off your arm," I grumbled, exasperated.
"Then my arm would be the better for having been cut off by you." That sassy smile still on his lips and impudence dancing in his eyes, he nudged me with his nose again.
"Leaf, I swear to Varda I wish I had a knife right now."
"We all know you couldn't hurt the tiniest of Hobbits if you wanted to." This received a thump on the nose, at which Legolas whimpered and turned his light, honey-brown eyes toward me. Damn those puppy-dog eyes.
"Alright, I'm up," I mumbled finally. Legolas jumped off the bed as dexterously as he had jumped on, like an excited child who has just awoken his parents on the morning of his birthday. I yawned and stretched, watching Legolas hop out of my room before dressing myself.
At length, a timid knock came at my bedroom door. I yelled for the offender to enter, and I saw Aragorn's head peep inside. "We're supposed to be going to breakfast," he said groggily.
"Oh, wonderful, well, prepare yourself to be seated at a table with giggling courtesans and high-end nobility," I replied, rolling my eyes. Aragorn grinned.
"I won't be out of place then, will I?"
"Please, as if you would ever accept your title," I retorted. Aragorn shrugged as if to say 'you never know,' and hurried me out of my room. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you were too shy to go in by yourself."
"Good thing you do know better," Aragorn snapped, but I could tell he was a bit intimidated by all the Elves who kept staring at him as if he were a giant spider of which they needed to rid themselves. Every Elf seated at the two long tables in the dining room were staring as we walked past, clearly taken aback by the sight of a human in their midst, especially one accompanying another Elf. I smiled feigned-pleasantly at them as we walked toward Legolas, who was seated near the far end of one table next to Kaethe and across from Malian. He was waving excitedly at us, pointing animatedly to two empty chairs on his other side. I waved back stupidly, widening my eyes to give the impression he was making a fool of himself again. He obviously did not catch the hidden message, because he continued to point fervently at the chairs beside him. I had to mentally stop myself from rolling my eyes; I was all too sure no one would be very understanding if I rolled my eyes at their Prince. Finally, we reached him and he stopped his inane pointing.
As I took my seat, I smiled broadly and whispered out of the corner of my mouth, "I'm pretty sure everyone in Middle-earth saw you pointing. I think the Orcs in Mordor know where I'm sitting for breakfast." Legolas smirked but did not reply. Malian eyed Aragorn suspiciously from across the table. After a moment of quiet chatter, all the Elves at the two tables began to stand. I thought it best not to remain seated, and took my place next to Legolas; Aragorn hurried out of his seat as well, anxious not to be the last person standing. I suddenly realized why we had all gotten to our feet; Thranduil had walked into the dining room and was making his way to our end of the table. I looked to the left and saw an empty chair at the very end; Thranduil paused for a moment in front of it before sitting. Everyone followed suit unanimously. This was a ritual I had forgotten about in my five-hundred-year absence.
"It's been so long since I have seen you at one of our tables, Laina," Thranduil said loudly while the entire room was still hushed. I wanted to cringe but stopped myself, as everyone was staring at me in disbelief.
"Yes," I replied, clearing my throat, "I have been gone for quite some time but could not resist visiting your lovely son again." Had I managed to keep the sarcasm out of my voice? Everyone at our table gaped at me and Thranduil chuckled slightly. "…Your…Highness," I added slowly, which only elicited more chuckling from the king.
"Well, I thank my son then for being so unforgettable and causing the return of one of our own," Thranduil replied, glancing at his son and Kaethe (did I see a hint of discontent when his eyes passed over her?) before acknowledging Aragorn with a slight nod. "And it is our pleasure to have Aragorn visit us as well, despite the little—ahem—friend he brought along." I knew he was referring to Gollum, but everyone else seemed a bit dubious. "That having been said, let's eat." He certainly did not waste too much of anyone's time greeting guests, and at those words, the staring and gaping ceased and Aragorn and I were left to eat in peace. Well, mostly.
"I have always thought I have made a great Prince," Legolas was saying to Kaethe, and it came out as somewhat of a murmur if I knew better.
"What was that?" I asked so loudly that Thranduil looked up from his plate, a twinge of laughter in his eyes.
"He was just saying how everyone in the Wood looks up to him," Kaethe responded lightly. I raised one eyebrow at Thranduil, who chuckled into his food. Legolas looked up sharply at his father, glaring a bit before returning to his own plate. Before I had much time to respond, I heard a few giggles to my right and I looked down at the culprits. Four or five female Elves were huddled up together a few seats away from us, tittering and causing a bit of a disturbance around them. These must be the 'ladies' I had grown up trying to derail. I recognized two of them from my childhood at the halls: their names were Bethwyn and Edáline, and they were even harder to bear than Kaethe had proven thus far. Of all the dense, idiotic things to do, Bethwyn, Edáline, and their cronies were stealing glances at Legolas and whispering to one another what they supposed was secretly.
"You have a fan club, Your Highness," I admonished, nudging Legolas' elbow with my own. He shot me a dry glare before glancing apprehensively at the giggling noblewomen. The tips of his ears turned a light shade of pink.
"They are so embarrassing," Legolas whispered, returning to his food.
"I could teach them a thing or two," I offered, and Legolas' pointed ears perked up a bit. "I could teach a lot of females around here a thing or two," I added under my breath. Legolas had obviously caught that last bit, because he gave me a sharp prod in my ribs with his elbow.
"I know who you're referring to," he said, trying to sound threatening and cross, but this gesture proved difficult as I had always had the ability to read his twinkling eyes.
"Whatever do you mean?" I questioned, false innocence in my voice. Legolas shook his head slightly and winked; I would have liked to continue our little conversation, but Aragorn was now nudging me in the ribs quite violently at my right. "Varda, Aragorn, what do you want?" I couldn't keep the annoyance out of my voice. I had just been getting somewhere in this Kaethe conversation when I was rudely interrupted by his nudging. "This had better be good." Aragorn was looking nervous and he nodded his head ever so slightly in the direction of the tittering bunch of 'ladies.'
"They're staring at me now," he whispered. I stifled an outright laugh before raising both eyebrows at him curiously.
"You can run around all day tracking Orcs and sticking your sword in any vile creature that threatens to come near, yet you're cowering at the thought of a few giggling morons?"
"In my defense, women can be vicious," he replied. I had to give him that.
"Especially Elven women," I agreed. "They probably hate you because you're all scruffy and, well, human." He looked even more terrified. This could be fun. "You should probably avoid them at all costs. Never speak to them, Aragorn," I warned very seriously, "they'll attack." Aragorn nearly jumped out of his seat and managed to push his chair back a few finger lengths away from Bethwyn, Edáline and their crew. With that (and suppressing a smile), I turned back to Legolas fully intending to engage him in conversation, but his back was toward me. I frowned, glancing across the table at Malian. To my surprise, he had not taken his blue eyes off of me and was currently making me very uncomfortable.
"Malian," I said forcefully, engaging him in eye-to-eye contact rather than eye-to-forehead. "Staring is not very flattering."