The Demon Remembers

Disclaimer: Not mine, just breaking and mending. I'll put em back when I'm done. Promise.

Summary: Spying, crying and words.

Reviews: Yes please. Love reviews more than is good for me. Readers Rock but Reviewers RULE!

A/N: Warning, there are some implications of torture in this chapter. Spike speaks! Yay! Well, not a lot but the word count is definitely going up.

Many thanks as always to my rockin partner in crime WayWard Childe for his advice, encouragement and continually challenging me to write better chapters. Thanks, Luv.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Giles gaped at the young man sitting next to him, futilely attempting to process the theological leap the soldier had just presented. One thing struck him as being odd. "Michael, you said 'she'. Who is 'she' exactly?"

Michael gave a small humorless smile. "She is Professor Maggie Walsh. She's the director of the Initiative." His dislike of the woman was evident in his tone.

Rupert blinked. The Initiative? "What is the Initiative?" He asked curiously.

"It is a military operation secreted beneath the campus of UC Sunnydale. Its purpose is to contain and control the demon population of the area. Professor Walsh has deviated from that objective in that she has decided to experiment on the demons. She had permission from the government to install behavior control chips in their brains but that was all. The torture she's inflicting on the captives is horrific in the extreme." Michael twisted his fingers in his lap and studied them closely. He closed his eyes and sighed. "What she did to that Hostile… I'm sorry…. Spike was wrong in so many ways."

The Watcher removed his glasses. He was intimately familiar with torture. His stint as Angelus' captive had been very educational. He'd only been the dark vampire's 'guest' for a day. He knew Spike had been in the clutches of the Initiative for far longer than that. "How long was Spike in the Initiative?" He asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"I was there for ten months. They captured him a month after I got there. I requested a transfer three months ago but they said that it was impossible to leave early. They kept me away from the Hostile confinement area after that. I was shifted to perimeter guard duty a few days after my paperwork was kicked back." His serious blue-grey eyes focused unnervingly on Giles. "He stopped talking seven months ago. Professor Walsh tortured him into silence. She refused to allow him independent thought. What gets me…" He trailed off, turning his gaze to study the small tasteful living room he'd found himself in.

"What 'gets' you?" Giles asked gently. He could tell this soldier was a gentle, kind hearted person. He couldn't fathom what possessed the young man to enlist in the military, given his peaceful nature.

"What gets me is how the other guys in the unit accept the way the demons are treated. They act like its ok to inflict that kind of pain on another sentient being." Michael answered quietly.

Giles noticed he didn't refer to the demons as people or animals but sentient beings. That was certainly an interesting way to look at it. One that Giles admittedly had never thought of. But then, he'd never had any sustained contact with any demons other than Angelus and his vampire family. The ensouled Angel was not someone he trusted or even liked very much. He knew from his admittedly limited contact with Spike that the blond vampire was fairly intelligent. He'd shown remarkable cunning and stealth when he'd concealed his recovery from his Sire and Grandsire. Something Michael had said registered.

"Did you say that Spike had been in that place for nine months?" The question was harsh with shock. It came out a little louder than he would have liked and he glanced at the stairs to make sure the girls were still out of earshot. He didn't see Buffy lurking at the top of the stairs.

"Yes, Sir. That's just about right. They let him escape a few days ago so they could see how the chip would work and what he'd look like if he starved long enough. I heard some of the other guys talking while we were looking for him. They thought it was funny." Mike admitted, his handsome face grimaced in distaste over the plan.

"Oh my God." Giles whispered, appalled and disgusted. While Drusilla had told him some of what the younger vampire had been through, she'd neglected to say how long her Childe had been captive. Could it be she didn't know? Is that why she hadn't arrived sooner to help him?

In the basement…

Joyce and Xander watched wordlessly as Drusilla drifted closer to the seemingly captivated demon crouched on the cot. They huddled together near the stairs. Each of them wondered why they were there.

Drusilla fought to keep the rage she was feeling from her face. Anger was not what her Childe needed at this time. She knew that gold was flickering in her eyes. She reached out to touch his gaunt face, tracing her slender fingers over his ridges gently as his eyes flickered closed.

"No, my William. Look at Mummy." She murmured. His golden eyes opened slowly and he gazed up at her, apparently unaware of their witnesses. All of his attention was focused on his Sire. She smiled as her razor sharp fingernail scored lightly down his cheek. He flinched as blood welled in the cut. Joyce gasped at the action, watching horrified as Dru leaned down and licked the seeping wound. The soft sound drew the demon's attention. He turned his head slightly and trained his hazy gaze on the humans near the stairs. Dru put her finger under his chin and brought his eyes back around to herself.

"I said, look at Mummy." She instructed. She concentrated on the flavor of her Childe's blood. She could taste the terror he'd been living under, the pain from the chip and the comfort he'd gleaned from being in this basement. She turned her head and looked over at Joyce. "Home." She said softly.

Spike jumped at the word. Home. Forbidden thoughts swirled in his confused mind. Tiny sparks of pain began shooting through his head as he fought to bring coherency to those thoughts. He opened his mouth to try to speak but fear made him hesitate.

Drusilla placed her finger gently on his parted lips. "In a moment, Luv. First you must change your face. Let William out, Pet." She stroked his ridges, indicating she wanted them to recede.

Panic flooded the demon's body as images flashed in his mind. A huge tank filled with icy water. A chair with wrist and ankle straps, electric wires that attached to sensitive portions of a body. A room heated nearly hot enough to reduce a vampire to dust. Another room so cold frost developed on the walls. Shiny medical instruments that were used to slice into skin and bone. He began to tremble in denial of what she was asking.

Drusilla picked up on her Childe's renewed terror and began to croon softly. "It's all right Sweet William. You must let the demon recede so I can see you." Her voice was low and soothing, pitched to enthrall the listener.

Spike swallowed visibly as his tormented mind tried to process the request. He wasn't sure he could change his face. It had been so long since… A shiver shook his too-thin body as his head swung slowly from side to side, denying the order from his Sire to change his visage.

'You are a thing. Things do not have the right to human features. Monsters like you should look like monsters. Don't let me see that face again. You do not speak. I never want to hear another word come from your filthy mouth. Monsters do not think. If I get the feeling that you are thinking, you will regret it. Do you understand? Just nod if you do.' The words that had been drilled into his mind came rushing to the forefront of his memory.

Drusilla sensed that she was losing his attention. She grasped his chin in a nearly painful grip. "Childe." The single word was low and menacing. The slow shake of his head had surprised her. Denying a direct order from a Sire was grounds for severe punishment.

Panic flooded the demon's slender frame. He could smell humans in the room; humans equaled pain and punishment in his fractured mind. His Sire had his face in a grasp that could, and very possibly would, turn painful in a millisecond. Instinct had him desperately wanting to obey his Sire's command, but fear kept his face from changing and sheer terror kept him silent.

Upstairs…

Buffy padded down the stairs as silently as her slayer training allowed. She'd heard the last portion of the conversation that had taken place between her Watcher and the young soldier. As much as she sometimes hated her destiny as the 'Chosen One', it was times like this that drove home just how much it did suck. She'd caught enough of the conversation to understand why the demonic activity on the Hellmouth had decreased in the past few months. She paused when she realized that Michael was staring straight at her as she stealthily moved down the stairs.

Giles noticed that his companion's attention had been diverted. He shifted to look in the same direction as the younger man, frowning when he spotted Buffy coming downstairs.

"Buffy? I seem to recall asking you to stay upstairs." The Watcher chided. Buffy gave up on stealth and hopped quickly down the remaining steps.

Michael watched the petite blonde come further into the room. Long ingrained habit had him rising slightly as she moved closer. She blinked at his unexpected courtesy.

The Slayer turned her attention to Giles. "Will's making Dawn study. I wanted to know what Drusilla's up to. I feel a bit wiggy having her wandering around the house like that. What did she want Mom and Xander for?"

"She feels that Joyce and Xander can help her with Spike's recovery. I'm not sure exactly how she plans on doing that." The Brit answered.

Buffy went into the kitchen. She retrieved the baby monitor and, returning to the living room, waggled it in the air suggestively. "Why don't we do a bit of eavesdropping?"

In the basement…

Spike dropped his gaze from his Sire's icy blue eyes. She let out a subsonic growl of frustration at the submissive act. Her lovely features shifted. "Look at me." She ordered, her fangs glistened in the bright light of the room. Very slowly, the fear filled golden eyes moved back up to meet hers. "That's right, Pet. See me." Purposely she let her demon recede. "Let me see you."

He flicked an apprehensive glance toward the humans several feet away, looking away quickly as his training dictated. Never stare directly at a human, to do so was grounds for swift and severe punishment. He was beneath humans. Dru did not mistake the reason behind the glance. "They are not here to hurt you, my Childe. They are here to help." Her fingers tightened fractionally on his chin. "Disobey me again and I may punish you but humans will never be allowed to do so again." She swore softly in his ear.

The demon processed the threat carefully. He could not remember how this lovely creature could punish him. His recent memories were of excruciating pain and mind blinding torment. Cold steel chains fastened to the ceiling, pulling arms from their sockets. Cattle prods that delivered quick agonizing jolts of electricity. Sharp surgical steel that sliced through cool skin and tense muscles without anesthetic. A shudder racked his body as midnight blue chased a fraction of the gold from his eyes.

Drusilla hissed in an unneeded breath sharply. "Yes. That's it, Little One. Put the demon away. Let me see William." This time when he shook his head his demonic ridges receded and his human face was revealed for the first time in many months. He held his unnecessary breath in fear.

"There you are." Dru cooed. "My lovely boy. Now, tell Mummy how long you were in that horrid place."

This time the eyes that held hers were sapphire blue. She could see the terror holding him silent. The elder vampire watched carefully as he opened his mouth experimentally. "Yes, Childe. Talk to Mummy." She encouraged. He caught his breath at the loving tone in the words. He took another deep unneeded gulp of air.

His voice was husky from disuse, a mere whisper of sound that seemed to echo in the huge room. "I don't know." His gaze dropped as he tensed for the punishment he was sure he'd earned by being unable to provide the information she wanted. Dru clucked softly at the action, pulling his chin back up so he faced her again.

"That's all right, Darling. What's the last thing you remember other than that place?" Her question was gently spoken.

Thick dark lashes fluttered with fear as he tried to recall something that didn't have to do with that place. More images flashed through his head, a disquieting video of the torment he'd endured for those long months. A flicker of feeling filtered through the confusion. He sent a surprised glance toward the human female who stood watching with a trembling hand covering her mouth. He struggled briefly as he tried to remember the word. Sire had said it earlier. He tried and failed to say it. He frowned in uncertainty but his forehead cleared seconds later as he came up with the word he was searching for. His gaze locked on Joyce's damp hazel eyes. Very deliberately, he spoke again. "Home."

Upstairs….

Buffy shook the monitor she was holding. "What did he say?" Her big green eyes focused on Giles for the answer.

"He said, 'Home'." Michael told her, his own gaze fixed on the small plastic transmitter.

Giles cleared his throat. "He said that earlier for your mother. She tried to bribe him into speaking and that's what he said. That was the fright Xander spoke about. Spike thought Xander had been sent down to punish him for speaking."

Mike nodded. "That sounds about right. Professor Walsh would sweet-talk him into speaking and then punish him when he did. She also bribed him a few times but after a while he caught on and refused to say anything at all. I'm really surprised he responded to Mrs… I'm sorry… What was your mother's name?" The last question was aimed at Buffy.

"Summers, her name is Joyce Summers." Buffy blurted, startled.

The soldier flashed a smile at the Slayer. "Thank you. As I was saying, he hasn't spoken in seven months. I'm surprised Mrs. Summers was able to get him to say anything at all. Your friend, Xander, is about the right age and size for one of the punishers. It's no wonder Spike was afraid of him."

"Punishers?" Giles asked.

Mike nodded, a grimace twisting his handsome face. "Some of the more… willing… recruits who didn't mind learning how to cause pain were given the job of punishing the demons who wouldn't cooperate. Spike earned more than his fair share of punishment until she broke him. It took her two months. A lot of other Hostiles broke in a lot less time. He was stubborn. She loved that about him. He became her favorite test subject. Her pet project."

Buffy stared. "Did you say Professor Walsh? She's my psychology professor. Are you telling me she did that to Spike?"

In the basement…

Joyce turned abruptly and buried her face in Xander's shoulder, her tears beginning to dampen his shirt. The male Scooby closed his arms around her instinctively. The demon watched the human's actions with narrowed blue eyes. A low snarl began low in his chest. Drusilla watched his reaction with interest.

'Well, my William has not changed.' She thought indulgently. She ran elegant fingers through his tousled curls, tugging gently on the two-toned locks to bring his attention back on herself. "William." She said aloud. "Why do you say 'home' when you look at her?"

Spike looked up at his Sire, reluctantly dragging his gaze away from the couple by the steps. He frowned as he tried to sort his thoughts as sparks of pain continued to shoot through his brain. How could he explain it? A forgotten memory floated to the surface of the chaos that was his thought processes. Hot chocolate in a large white mug with tiny little marshmallows warmed his hands while he listened to this woman talk about her day. It didn't matter who else lived under this roof, while he was visiting he was… His eyes widened with sudden realization. Now, if he could just remember how to say it. One word that might explain how he felt. Long moments passed as she waited patiently. Finally he had it. A deep breath and the word sighed out. "Safe."

TBC