Disclaimer: see chapter 1

A/N: Sorry for the wait. I'll make it up to you :-)

Chapter 17

I avoid Hank for the time being, until I know what's going on. I refuse to believe Catherine, maybe I have feelings for him but it's definitely not love. And even if I do love him, I'm not sexually attracted to him, like to see how that works out. Nice couple we would be. And as much as he might love me, I don't think he wants to live celibately, heck I don't want to live like that either. I sigh and look out of my car window, beats me how I ended up here, but I'm in front of Catherine's house.

I walk to her front door just as I am about to knock it opens and Catherine gives me a weird look. "Yeah, I'm surprised too."

She smiles and motions for me to enter. She walks into her kitchen and I follow like a lost puppy. Lindsey is sitting at the table, she's struggling with her homework. I step a bit closer to her and watch over her shoulder, she's trying to do some math exercises.

"You need some help with that?"

She lets out a deep sigh and rolls her eyes. She looks so much like her mother, I smile again. She looks at me with a grin "Can you really help me? I asked mom, but she doesn't know what I'm talking about." I look at Catherine and she blushes.

"I have never been that good with numbers." She says half-apologetic. She's a bit embarrassed and that's just too cute.

"Well, I'm pretty good with numbers so let me have a look." I sit down next to Lindsey and start to explain what she has to do to come up with the right solution. She's totally in awe, now it's my turn to feel a bit embarrassed.

"Wow, you are good! You actually make sense. Thanks a lot Sara!" she exclaims almost bouncing on her chair. She takes her book again and finishes the rest of her exercises occasionally asking me for help. Catherine in the meantime was watching the interaction between us and providing me with coffee. When Lindsey is finished, she runs to the couch, plops down and turns the TV on.

Catherine is watching me intently and I feel a blush creeping over my cheeks. "And you are the one that told us you weren't good with kids. Well, you aren't… you are incredibly good with kids." My face must have turned a couple shades of red by her statement.

"Still waters…" I wink at her.

"Not that you're not welcome, but why are you here?"

"I don't know really. I was thinking about what you said about my feelings for Hank and I'm … confused." I answer honestly. "Maybe I might have feelings for him, but I'm not attracted to him, not in the way I should be if he were my lover."

Understanding is readable of her face. "Well, stop thinking about it for once. Just go with the flow." She winks at me and my face flushes again. "I'm having a party this weekend, maybe you should come and bring Hank."

I would love to come, but I won't bring Hank, that's not what I tell Catherine though "Sure thing."

Today is Catherine's party, I'm in front of my closet trying to figure out what to wear, I have been standing here for ages. Why is it so hard to find something to wear? And why am I this nervous?

It's mine and Catherine's night off, the rest of the team has to work tonight, so the party starts at 3pm. It's 2pm now and I don't want to be late, so I grab my new black slacks and opt for my new light blue buttoned shirt. See, it wasn't that hard, I berate myself for wasting so much time. Luckily I have showered previously, so in a minimum of time I'm out of the door and in front of Catherine's house.

There's only one car in the driveway apart from Catherine's car, that must be Grissom I can only think of one person to beat me in being this early, it's 2.25 now. I walk up to her door and here's that nervous feeling again, I feel like a teenager who is allowed to go to their first party. Stupid, I know. I'm greeted by a smiling Catherine, who looks absolutely stunning. She's wearing a low-cut blouse, showing quite some cleavage and jeans, fitting tightly in all the right places.

"Wow…" I breathe out. My throat has gone completely dry and I have to swallow a couple of times.

"Glad, you like it." She says with an appreciating smile. "You look gorgeous too." I blush violently.

We enter and I take place on the couch next to Grissom, there's food everywhere. Catherine asks if I want a beer and I nod.

"Hi Griss."

"Hello Sara, you look nice." He says sincerely.

We are talking about work when Catherine reappears with two beers, one for me and one for her. When she hears what we are talking about, she rolls her eyes and sighs "I cannot believe the two of you, I'm having a party and you are talking about work! You are both lucky I like you so much or I would've thrown the both of you out." I almost choke, she likes me this makes me smile widely.

Not long after, Nick, Warrick and Greg arrive. Now the party started, we joked, talked and danced. And of course, we drank quite a bit. Especially Cath and I because we don't have to work. Greg is a bit tipsy and he wants to play one of those stupid college games which involves drinking and talking about previous sexual encounters. Thank God, nobody wanted to play. I don't think I'm drunk enough to tell anyone stuff about my sex life.

Warrick and Nick are trying to explain something about a new videogame to Grissom and Greg is laughing his head off, because Grissom doesn't understand a word of what they are saying and he keeps asking the most dense questions. It's quite funny and I'm enjoying the show. Suddenly I have this weird feeling, the one you get when you think someone is staring at you, I look to my right and catch Catherine looking quickly away, pretending nothing happened.

I smirk, the alcohol in my system giving me more courage than usual, I move closer towards her and in the most innocent voice I can muster I ask "Did you see something you like?" Although she's blushing, she wouldn't be Catherine Willows if she wouldn't be able to come up with some smartass remark.

"Depends…I was wondering if I should get a new painting or to keep that one." she motions with her head in the direction I was sitting, I look in that direction and on the wall that was behind me I see a painting. She's good.

"Well you should be wondering to reposition it then, because your eyes were fixed on something a little lower than the painting."

She's stunned for a moment, because I'm beating her at her own game, but she collects herself within seconds "You're right Sidle, I should. Are you volunteering to be my new decorator?"

"Why…so you can check me out some more?"

She opens her mouth, but closes it again. She has no answer to that one, I can't believe it but I won. Inwardly I'm doing a little dance of joy, but it's short-lived because she stands up and stomps off to the kitchen, indicating she's angry or annoyed or maybe both. I contemplate for a moment what I should do, I decide to talk to her. "Cath, are you okay? I really hope I didn't cross a line or something."

"Now that would be new, Sidle crossing a line." Her tone was harsh matching her facial expression. Ah, we were back playing the game we know best… This woman infuriates me! She was checking me out, I call her upon it and she's angry because I clearly crossed a line! If I didn't care so much about her, I would have left but I can't.

"Why are you being like this? Did I say something wrong?" she answers my questions with a death glare. She's drunk, I can tell by the way she's trying to stay upright without swaying, she's struggling to keep her balance but she manages. When did she become this drunk? "You're drunk." I state emotionless.

"Wow, I think I am in awe now." She emphasizes her words by opening her mouth and eyes slightly. "Sara Sidle notices something that's right under her nose!" she's mocking me.

"Cath, I don't know what I have done wrong but you are too drunk to have a civil conversation." She steps closer and I wince she looks like she's ready to hit me. I'm trapped between the counter and her body and I'm petrified.

"It's not civil conversation I want…" I feel her hot breath on my lips. She tries to close the distant between us by kissing me. I can't remember how many times I dreamt about her doing that, but not like this. She's drunk and handling a tense situation like she knows best, using her sexuality. I use the fact that I'm taller to my advantage by pulling away, she looks up at me and sees the hurt and fear in my eyes.

"Sara, I'm sorry. I …I don't know what got into me."

"It's okay, I understand. Let's go back to the party before your guests start to miss you." I give her a faint smile to reassure her that I'm not angry. I'm not nevertheless she hurt me like hell. She saw me as she saw her 'boyfriends', objects she could use as she pleased.

It was time for the guys and Grissom to head out, they offered to help cleaning up, but I said it wouldn't be a problem. I started to clean up, while Catherine was walking them out. A sigh indicates she's back. I turn around and look at her. She looks devastated, she regrets what she tried to do in the kitchen. "Sara, I am so sorry. You didn't deserve that. I'm so sorry."

"No, I didn't. But it's okay, I know you regret it. Now let's get you into bed."

She crosses her arms in front of her chest "No way and let you clean up this mess all on your own."

"Catherine, you're drunk and I can handle this. You are going to have a shower, brush your teeth and get into bed." She wants to protest again but I hold up my hand stopping her. "You can either do it by yourself or I'll help you, it's your choice."

She turns around without saying a word. I clean up the mess we have made and fill a large glass with water. I go upstairs and enter her bedroom, she's already resting, I move to her side of the bed and sit down handing her the glass. "Here, it will help."

She rolls her eyes, but drinks the water I offered her. "Why are you being so nice to me, when all I do is being bitchy to you and biting your head off without a reason."

I shrug "That's just how it is, I like you and I won't let you walk over me whether you like it or not. I'm a person, not an object and I won't let you take advantage of me." she knows what I'm talking about but doesn't say a word. A tear rolls over her cheek and I wipe it away gently. I give her kiss on her forehead which makes her smile "Now sleep." I say warmly.

I wake up because I hear or I think I hear someone call my name. I don't want to wake up, I had this wonderful dream.

"Sara, honey…wake up."

I open my eyes and see the protagonist of my dream trying to wake me, maybe I'm still dreaming. I groan why was someone trying to mess with my mind. I blink a couple of times trying to clear my vision, but I still saw those two beautiful blue orbs and the concern deep within them.

"What are you still doing here and why are you on the couch?"

"Needed to sleep, wanted to be here for you." My speaking organs aren't awake yet.

She smiles "Come on, let's put you in bed so you can have some proper sleep."

With every word she said, I woke up a bit more. I sit up so fast, I'm glad I didn't hurt myself. "No, I know you're fine now, so I can go home."

"Sara, you are in no state to drive. I'm sorry but I can't let you."

"Catherine, you're not my mother. I'm old enough to know if I'm able to drive or not." She's getting angry again but I don't care, I can't share her bed with her.

"I know I'm not your mother and I won't keep you here against your will…" she says gently.

I get up but immediately fall down, I'm shaky and my legs give out on me. She's right, I am in no condition to drive. Damn! I sigh, there's no way out, we have to share a bed. But I don't give up that easily, I'm a fighter. "Seems you were right, but I'll sleep on the couch again."

"Sara, this couch is too small for you. Either you go upstairs with me or I'll carry you up myself, it's your choice." She is using my own words against me, this is so unfair. I stand up again and reluctantly take the hand she offered me. We walk to the bathroom where she gives me a spare toothbrush, then she gives me a tank top and a pair of shorts. She walks to her bedroom to give me some privacy. It takes me a lot longer than normal to get ready, I'm tired and only one thought is occupying my mind 'I'm going to share a bed with Catherine'. I open her door nervously, she smirks at me "Took you long enough, I though you had climbed out the little window."

I walk over to my side of the bed and lie down as far away from Catherine as possible. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

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