Thoughts

"Speaking"

000000000000000000000- different scene or line

--o-- - Changes to a different scene, same place

I don't own CSI but I do own Ginnelle, her father, Grissom's kid, John and Mike, and a Christopher Patrick

Grissom's heart raced as they took to their cars to find Alex. After three hours of driving to the middle of no where it was starting to get dark and they where still driving! Gil looked back at his closed cell phone silently willing it to start ringing again. He had to close it while driving for he couldn't concentrate on his driving trying to listen for her small but beautiful voice. They drove for about another hour 'til they met with the general location of Alex; the forest. Everyone stopped and parked their cars anywhere they could. Once they stopped the CSIs and the police that came with them got out of their vehicles. Grissom was surprise but grateful for all of the police that had volunteered to come out and help him search for Alex.

Gil sighed as they started to make groups of people to start their search. Even though he was here and helping he could teach one pit of evidence. He was completely off of Ginnelle's and Alex's case. He wasn't allowed to help them but at least he was able to join in the search. That was more than he could say to some parents who had to wait until the CSIs found something.

If possible Grissom's heart quickened even more as the search begun. Gil was with his team and Brass with a few other police officers. Grissom made a mental note to thank each and every officer that came out to help him tonight.

It was hard to see when it was dark even with the flashlights that the people around him were using. They had been searching for about a half an hour when they got a call over the radio. They were saying they found something. Grissom and the rest of his group of people quickened their pace to their new given location. When they got there Gil thought his heart stopped. There was the yellow crime taped tied around four trees giving them a square shape. The police that were already there had their heads down like they found something bad or worse Grissom thought. It could be Alex's body. God, Grissom hoped not. As they walked towards the scene the officers parted to let them through; each one giving Grissom a saddened look. That made Gil's worries grow as the quickly approached the scene.

Once they got there everyone but Grissom past underneath the crime tape. He wasn't allowed in there. Gil knew his limit and he wasn't about to hurt the case that was building up. No he rather stay behind and watch then feel the guilt that would be cause by seeing Alex's and Ginnelle's kidnapper go free because of him. And he could forget about Sara's beating either. The hospital hasn't called him yet so far so good. That means that Sara was ok and the baby with inside Sara was alive and well.

Gil watched from the sidelines looking at his team doing their work. As far as he could tell there was no body much to Grissom's relief and that they were centered in one or two spots; one on the ground and a spot on the tree not far from the one the ground. It was some time before Catherine came up to him to report on what she had found. That was another thing that he got that other parents would have gotten.

"Catherine?" Grissom asked her his silent question. Catherine shook her head.

"We have found the cell phone that Alex used to call you. By the looks of it, it was John's." Catherine told him and he nodded for her to continue. "I'm sorry Grissom the phone it covered in blood. It's most likely Alex's." Grissom raised his head up trying to stop the tears that were going to come and turned around facing away from Catherine.

"The tree?" It was a simple question but in this case there was no simple answer.

"There's a bloody hand print, Grissom. It's small, that too is most likely Alex's hand print. We're going to do a comparison once we get our samples back to the lab." she broke the ice to him.

"No need." Gil said. Catherine's eyes widened a bit from Grissom's words.

"But Gil-" she tried to reason with him but he cut her off.

"You know as well as I know that both the blood and hand print is Alex's! My Alex! My baby girl's hurt out there somewhere I can't do nothing but stand here. You didn't hear her Catherine! She sounded so small and scare. She said 'help' to me and I can't give her what she asked from me." Grissom had turned around and practically yelled in her face. Others looked on with a sad expression of their own on their faces for their fellow friend while others looked like they could relate to Gil as they too had daughters of their own. Grissom walked away to cool down some before he had to go back to the lab. His little girl had asked him for his help and he wasn't able to even get there in time to help her.

Brass walked up to the team with a smile on his face as Grissom was leaning against a tree not far from them. The team looked at Jim expecting him to give them orders as to what to do or a new clue to where Ginnelle or Alex was. He was too happy something must have happened for the good.

"I just got a call from a gas station close to here. The owner claims that he has Alex." Brass said it load enough for everyone including Grissom to hear. No one did cheers or even clapped. For they knew it might be a false lead but that didn't stop the hope that was growing in their hearts. The crime scene was processed and done so everyone run back to their cars and began driving towards the location of the gas station that said to have Alex.

While Grissom was driving to the gas station he couldn't stop moving in his seat. He was hoping against all hope that this lead was true and he was going to see his baby girl again. Then Grissom began to think about Ginnelle. He realized that he had been more concerned about Alex than Ginnelle and this brought guilt to his heart. Ginnelle could be died for all he knows and here he was looking for Alex, just Alex. Grissom put his head down slightly in shame of himself. Did he forget all of the things that she did for him? Ginnelle had done so many things for him mostly during his own kidnapping but yet here he was more worried for Alex than Ginnelle. Grissom promised himself that if-no when they find Ginnelle he would make it up to her even if she didn't want it.

Grissom snapped out of his thoughts and feelings as they arrived at the gas station that suppose to have Alex inside, any thoughts that were about Ginnelle immediately left and put into the back of his mine. Once he was there Grissom didn't wait for anyone else to clear the area or the evidence. This was his daughter and he could get yelled out all they wanted but if his daughter was inside of this building it was worth it. He run to the front door only to stop as something red caught his eye. Looking more closely he saw another bloody hand print that looked like what Catherine has described to him back at the crime scene. Fear raced through him as he went into the front door practically ripping it from its' hinges as he pushed through. The bell above the door rang as he entered the store. He looked around to see if he could find he daughter but was disappointed when he couldn't find her.

"Are you looking for someone, sir?" a male voice from Gil's right side said. Grissom turned to the right to talk to the guy when he stopped short. The others were starting to enter the building as while and was staring a Grissom.

Gil could feel the tears in his eyes coming as he saw them. He saw the guy that had asked him the question but Grissom's eyes were trained on the little girl that was beside him. She was dirty that much was for sure, she had a gash on her face and Grissom could feel the rage come forth as he knew who did that to her, and there was a small gash on her tiny little head too. That explained to Gil how she was knocked out but enough of observing. Grissom knelt down and held his arms out as an invention for the little girl, his little girl.

Alex smile to him and ran into his arms. "Alex…" Grissom whispered his daughter's name as he held her.

"Daddy…" Alex said back with a sob while burying her face into the crock of his neck. She was crying but she wasn't the only one. Grissom was crying as while as the people around them. Grissom tried to hold his tears but stopped trying as he was holding Alex. After a sob came forth from his throat Grissom kissed her little head over and over again as head gently rocked the both of them back and worth.

Catherine seeing that no one was going to anything but look at the two she decided to take action. She came up to the two and she put a hand on Gil's shoulder. He head jerked up at the sudden touch. Catherine kneeled down to the two of them.

"Gil, will you let the medics take a look at her?" Catherine asked her boss. At the sudden thought of having Alex out of his arms he tighten his hold on her. He didn't respond to Catherine's question. Upon seeing that Grissom wasn't going to let Alex go any time so she motioned the medics that came with them to come over. They did and she told Gil that he could hold her but he had to let the medics check her over. Both Grissom and the medics agreed and Grissom was ushered outside to the ambulance.

While Grissom had Alex checked over Catherine took over and started to tell people their jobs. They gave no argue and did what was told of them. They question the owner who was Christopher Patrick. He told them what Alex had said to him and everyone started to fear about Ginnelle and her health. Back with Grissom and Alex, he was still holding her and she had some how feel asleep in his arms. The medics checked her over; cleaning up her wounds that John inflicted. Grissom's pulse quickened at the thought of John touching his little girl and he faintly wondered if this was what Ginnelle had to go through in her own kidnapping. She was with not just John but his brother too. Did she have to go through this everyday? Grissom knew that answer but he didn't what to believe it. They had to find Ginnelle but first things first. Grissom once again pushed all thoughts about Ginnelle into the back of his mind. He was going to take Alex back to the lab where he knows it's safe.

--o--

They returned to the lab with new evidence and most of all Alex. Grissom won't put her down for nothing, not even to drive back here. One of the officers had to do it but everyone understood. He went straight into the break room and set her down on the one of the couches. He then put his coat that he had with him and put it over her as a blanket. Grissom then brought up a chair to sit by her until she wakes up. They still need to question her and that part Grissom was dreading. But it was important to the case. She might know where John was. Gil stayed like that for some time just watching her. It was then that Alex woke up. The first thing she saw was he daddy. Alex smiled. She thought it was just a dream and reality she was still with John or in the trees. But no her daddy was here and now he can save her Aunty G. Aunty G! Alex screamed in her head as she remembered that her Aunty G was hurt badly. She had to tell her daddy. She sat up fast, too fast. The world around her started to spin like crazy. Gil took hold of Alex's shoulders and gently pushed her back down.

"Easy Alex. You have not fully recovered yet." Grissom tried to calm Alex down but it wasn't working. She struggled underneath he grasp. Gil knitted his eyebrow in confusion. "Alex, what's wrong." Grissom asked. Alex stopped her struggling long enough to say what she had to say.

"Daddy, hurry! Find Aunty G. She's hurt so badly. You have to find her." Alex pleaded with her father. Grissom was shocked at her exclaim. He had forgotten about Ginnelle. She was with John right now. How could he forget about her?! Gil put his head down in shame. Gil nodded and tried to settle Alex back down. After some persuading he finally got Alex to calm down. Grissom brought back the coat that fell off of her when she sat up and put it back on her and told her to get some sleep while he helped search for Aunty G.

Grissom was with his team at the lab after he had calmed Alex down. She was too upset to help them any so they decided to wait until she woke up again. Gil couldn't touch any of the evidence but he was allowed to be there when they went of the evidence they had found. Now that Alex was back they could now focus on Ginnelle. The way Alex screamed about Ginnelle, she was hurt badly and now it was a race against time to found Ginnelle.

"Were there any houses or buildings that John could have used of his hide out?" asked Nick. The others shook their heads no.

"We're going to need to talk to Alex." Catherine told them.

"No." Grissom said sharply and to the point. He was not going to let anyone near Alex. She had been through enough.

"You know, didn't the gas station owner say something about an abandon house?" said Warrick. Brass was there and he pulled out his notepad and started to flip pages over to the right one. Brass nodded.

"He did. He said that Alex told him the story but it was sketchy at best. We don't know what state she was in when she addresses him with this." Brass confirmed the abandon house theory.

"It shouldn't matter. We have to check it out." Greg said to them. He was right. It was a lead though it was a fishing hunt but it was a lead no less. The others started to pile out until no one was there but Catherine and Grissom.

"Grissom is there something wrong?" asked a worried Catherine. Grissom just nodded his head not saying anything. "What is it?" Gil stayed quite for so time before he answered Catherine's question.

"Do you think I'm a good father, Catherine?" Grissom asked her. Catherine was shocked that Gil even thought about that but she guessed it was brought on but the kidnapping of Alex.

"Grissom you're a great father. So don't beat yourself over this. Alex is going to need you once this is all over." Catherine said trying to reassure him. Gil shook his head.

"That's not what I meant." was all he said. Catherine was confused. If not for Alex than who?

"Why did you ask then Gil?" she asked trying to figure this out.

"I forgot about her Catherine." he said and she scrunched her eyebrows together not getting. He forgot about who?

"Who Gil? Who did you forget?" Catherine asked now she was really confused.

"Ginnelle…" was all he said as he grabbed a chair from his side and he sat into it. He put his head in his hands, covering his face and his shame. Ginnelle? Why would he say that he forgot about her? Catherine knelt down to him and put her right hand on his left shoulder. He didn't respond to her touch.

"Grissom, you didn't forget about Ginnelle. Just because you put your attention on finding Alex for a short period, doesn't mean you have forgotten about her. Gil, you didn't forget about her." Catherine tried to tell him but all he did was lift his head back up and started to shake it.

"I did. I caught myself having more concern for Alex than Ginnelle on the way to the gas station. Once I arrived at the gas station, I put all thoughts about Ginnelle in the back of my head. When I saw Alex there, alive and well, I was so happy; too happy. I felt that I was done, that I had my family back and I didn't need to search any more but how could I have my family back if Ginnelle is still out there. She is still with John, Catherine. She is hurt and could be dying somewhere. I didn't even think about Ginnelle 'til just now when Alex woke screaming about how Aunty G was hurt badly and pleaded with me to found her. All I did was nodded my head. How can I tell a five year old that I forgot all about Ginnelle?" Grissom told Catherine with pain laced in his voice. She seemed to understand now and her heart went out to Grissom. "This wasn't the first time I had forgot or left Ginnelle." Gil seemed to continue. "When Anthony died I had spent every wakened moment in my office or out in the field working trying to solve her father's case that had told Judy that no one was to come into my office not even Ginnelle. I did that because I didn't want to see the hurt and disappointment in her eyes when I would tell her that I had found nothing that would have caused his death. I shunned her away. On the day of the funeral for her father, I didn't come. I was too busy with the case of her father's death. I was yet I wasn't thinking about Ginnelle. I was so intended to solve the case I forgot about her. I kept thinking before anyone arrived. If Brass hadn't told me to go home I might not have been able to save Sara. Another thing is that she was almost 4 weeks pregnant." At those words Catherine's eye's widened.

"We didn't see that on the-" Grissom interrupted her.

"You wouldn't of. I told the doctor to not release that information. I had no real reason why, I just felt like I had to. If I hadn't come home when I did there wouldn't be a chance for the baby's survival. There still is a chance that the baby won't survive. And even now I still think what if I hadn't listened to Jim. Sara would most likely be dead now. Jim shouldn't have to tell me to go home, I should have been there already for them; for Ginnelle and I wasn't. I try to be a good father and I know that I'm not Ginnelle's real one but it's just the bond between me and her. I had asked you if I was a good father but I think I just answered my own question." Grissom finished what he had to say and he felt better. He had to admit that telling things like this to other people does help even when it hurts to say it sometimes.

"Grissom, I don't know what you're going through for I only have Linzy but you shouldn't beat your self up of this. Yes it horrible that you forgot about Ginnelle but the most important part is what you felt when you remembered. You are a shamed and you might feel that you have betrayed Ginnelle but that's ok for that only shows you that you care for Ginnelle deeply, don't you?" Catherine asked Gil. It was slightly hard to explain to Grissom that he wasn't to blame himself but she too asked herself how he could forget about Ginnelle. Catherine watched Gil nodded his head. "I don't know how to help you but the best thing to do right now is to get over it and be there for Ginnelle when we find her." Grissom didn't respond to her but got up and walked out of the lab. Catherine was worried for him and she too started waling out of the lab to follow the rest of the team. Little did they know that someone was there to hear Grissom's confessing and was going to cause pain to one of the people that Grissom held dear to the most.

Alright! Chapter 5 is up and ready to read and review. I like to sadly inform you that the next chapter is going to be the last one for this story. T-T -cries-

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