A/N: I am just coming up with these thing so quickly...I have truly found my calling. This is "The Internet is for Porn", from Avenue Q.
Joanne: Hmm. I need to teach those scamps who read fanfics about what the great wide world in the Internet can really offer them…BESIDES fanfiction. I have an idea! I'll sing a song to teach them about the Internet!
THE INTERNET IS FULL OF COOL NEW STUFF
Mark: FOR SLASH!
Joanne: THERE ARE NEW SITES WITHOUT FIC-SMUT OR -FLUFF
Mark: FOR SLASH!
Joanne: I BUY AND SELL MY CRAP
Mark: FOR SLASH!
Joanne: SO MUCH I NEED A MAP
Mark: FOR SLASH!
Joanne: I EVEN LISTEN TO MUSIC, LIKE ROCK AND RAP
Mark: FOR SLASH!
THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
SO MUCH, IT MAKES YOUR SYSTEM CRASH!
SLASH, SLASH, SLASH!
Joanne: Mark!
Mark: Oh, hi, Joanne.
Joanne: What the hell are you doing? I'm trying to teach kids about the non-fanfiction related joy of the Internet, and you are interrupting!
Mark: Oh, I'm so sorry!
Joanne: Well, just sit and be quiet, okay?
Mark: Okiedoke.
Joanne: IT'S GREAT TO KNOW WE HAVE THIS LUXURY
Mark: FOR SLASH! (WOOPS, SORRY)
Joanne: I KNOW ALL THE SITES THAT ARE RIGHT FOR ME
Mark: AND SLASH! (HEH, SORRY)
Joanne: THE WEBSITES ALL HAVE ADS
Mark: FOR—
Joanne: EVEN THEY ARE NOT THAT BAD
Mark: …
Joanne: AND THE INTERNET CAN SHOW YOU ALL NEW FADS
Mark: FOR SLASH!
THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
MARK/ROGER HAS MADE A SPLASH!
SLASH, SLASH, SLASH!
SLASH, SLAAAAASH, SL—
Joanne: Ew, that's disgusting! You're such a single white Jew-boy, Mark.
Mark: Sticks and stones, Jo.
Joanne: No, I mean it. Normal, romantically-involved people don't do slash fics on the Internet.
Mark: Oooooh? You have no idea! Ready, romantically-involved people?
Roger: Ready!
Collins: Ready!
Angel: Ready!
Mark: Lemme hear it!
All: THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
Mark: ALL THESE BOYS MAKES LOT OF NOISE FOR—
All: SLASH, SLASH, SLASH!
SLAAAAASH, SLAAAAASH, SLAA—
Joanne: Wait a minute!
Everyone Else: What?
Joanne: Now I happen to know for a fact that you, Roger, have over 8 pages of Romance fics with Mimi.
Roger: Yup.
Joanne: And you, Collins, have so many fluff fics with Angel you need therapy.
Collins: Uh-huh.
Joanne: And you, Angel, sleep with Collins on a regular basis, and you're in those fluff fics too!
Angel: Yes, I am.
Joanne: And you, Maureen—wait, what the hell are you doing here?
Maureen: Um…hoping to get in on some hot slash porn?
Joanne: Leave. Just leave.
Maureen: Hrmph.
Joanne: Anyway, you guys all have functional relationships!
Mark: That may be true. But Joanne…what do you think the writers use me for?
Roger: Um…yeah.
Collins: Sadly, true.
Angel: Sorry.
Joanne: EW!
All Men: THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
THE INTERNET IS FOR SLASH
THROW THE CANON IN THE TRASH
SLASH, SLASH, SLASH!
SLAAAAASH, SLAAAAAASH…
Mark: THE INTERNET IS FOR, INTERNET IS FOR, INTERNET IS FOR—
Joanne: Aw, screw it.
All: SLASH!