Standard disclaimers, blah, blah, blah. No visible scars on any of the Merry Men, tranquilizers will be provided to Steph upon demand when she gets home, etc...

Thanks to Jaime, Kate Manoso and Melody – you ladies have given me hope and inspiration that I might actually expand my own horizons.

I walked backwards down the hall and said, "Wake me up when you decide to get the kids up." I had just finished the sentence when Hector's hand grabbed mine and he pulled me into the room and locked the door.

Oh boy.

Stephanie's Gamble

By Alfonsina

Chapter 14 ♣ May The Trip Part 5

We stood just inside the door.

"Por que me dejaste? Why'd you leave me?" he asked. Damn, his voice was low and slow and sounded like it had a coo in it.

What the hell did he mean by that? I didn't leave, I went to the bathroom.

"I had to tee-tee. I mean, I had to go to the bathroom," I said, "and you were in the shower."

"It would have been OK," he said with a gentle smile.

"Not ready to share that with you, OK?" I said. He looked confused so I tried again, "I like to be alone for that."

"Come to bed? Please?" he asked.

I nodded.

I took a detour by way of the bathroom. I decided to get rid of my dragon breath first since it appeared he had vanquished his own. He was warm, comfy, and he smelled good. I did notice that despite the shower he had taken, the bathroom didn't feel warm and steamy. Interesting.

Once I was back on the bed, he leaned in to start the whole kissing thing over, but I changed my mind and backed away. This was confusing and frustrating. My hormones were loving it and so was most of my body, but my head was having major issues. For someone who said so openly he was 'gay', he'd been here in bed holding me, kissing me and making me forget everything but him and how good his body felt next to mine. I wasn't so sure I was going to make it until Bobby came to 'wake me up' after 7:00.

I whispered "No."

I rolled onto my side and tried to go to sleep; it didn't work.

"Nena, que tienes? What's the matter?" he asked, the voice was even more of a coo than I'd heard from him before. Crap, it sounded kind of sexy. In fact, his voice was sounding more and more sexy; this was not good. Under other circumstances, his voice by itself could have melted my panties right off of my body. It seemed the longer we were together, the sexier his voice was becoming. Was this a trick of my imagination, my hormones or some plot I was unaware of?

"Nothing," I said. I couldn't very well tell him that if I knew we hand condoms and we were alone, or if the locks actually worked, we would be doing the horizontal mambo based strictly on his ability to kiss, the way he smelled and how I forgot everything around me when he touched me anywhere.

Damn it.

I wasn't in the market for a one night stand; casual sex of any kind actually. I wanted a committed relationship before sex became an issue. I was feeling overwhelmed.

Joe and I had had sex way too early in the relationship and it was all that held us together for years. Ranger and I had only been together for the one fabulous night, and we knew each other better than Joe and I did, sort of, but it hadn't gone anywhere either.

Besides Hector had told me that he was gay. Lovely, I am sexually attracted to a gay man who could never be a long term possibility for me. That's me in a nutshell, always choosing Mr. Unavailable.

He was there whenever I needed him, for whatever I needed. I couldn't let things go any further because I would probably lose the friendship with him that I did have. Real friends, good friends were too hard to come by.

All I could think was that I was probably just a convenience or some kind of a great experiment. How long would he be interested when he realized my 'equipment' wasn't what he really thought he wanted? If I actually could keep him for any period of time, how will I be able to compete with the men who would by vying for his attention? I competed with other women just fine for men's attentions, I didn't always win but I could compete. I was way out of my league when it came to competing for a man with men.

So, here I was in bed with another man who was unavailable to me for lots of reasons; non-traditional reasons, but reasons nonetheless. I was doing everything in my powers not to let my body win this stupid war with my head.

God this was hard.

If he was questioning his sexuality, he needed to ask someone else. I couldn't help him answer his questions. Someone else would need to do that.

Part of my brain thought that I could deal with another bad morning after. The other part of my head knew it would be too much to take. The gossip about it would be too much to bear, 'Stephanie doesn't find straight men enough of a challenge, so she tried to convert a gay one.' 'If you were looking to experiment, I've got some experiments you'd love to be a part of.' Crap like that. I would be the butt of Rangeman jokes for months to possibly years to come.

I hated being me.

As I was thinking about all of this and more, my eyes began to leak and then my nose began to run. I wasn't crying, honest, just stupid leaking eyes and runny nose. Ok tears yes, crying maybe, sobbing no. Definitely not sobbing.

Hector didn't miss much. He put his hand on my shoulder and rolled me on to my back so I could look him in the eyes. He was raised up on his elbow looking down on me.

"Something is wrong," he said.

Mr. Observant was in bed with me and figured out something was wrong.

Brilliant.

"Nope. Nothing is wrong. Sometimes my eyes just water if I am tired. Let's just go to sleep OK? Morning will be here soon," I said. I knew he wasn't buying it, but it was the only thing I could come up with. Again with the planning ahead thing, it would have been nice but it was too late for that now.

He didn't believe me, but he let it go and didn't press the issue. I closed my eyes again and tried to do the whole deep breathing thing.

He rolled me so that I had my head on his chest and he could rub my back. He whispered some things into my hair. I have no idea what he said and I don't know how long he kept rubbing my back.

The next time I opened my eyes, they felt puffy and blood shot, his chest was damp and his eyes were open.

"Want to talk?" he asked.

"Not this morning, sorry," I said. This wasn't something I wanted to talk with anyone about anytime soon. I wanted to deny everything that had been going on and talking about it wouldn't help me deny one damned thing.

"Want to talk to Ranger?" he asked, not getting the hint.

"No. I don't want to talk to him either. I'm going to take a shower. Do you need to use the bathroom first?" I asked. I needed to get a little physical separation to get my body back under control.

"I'm OK. There's another bathroom," he said.

I took a quick shower, and yes, the room was steamy when I got done. I got myself toweled off and redressed for bed and climbed back into bed.

I tried to lie down on my own side of the bed, honest, but found myself turning so I could lie on my side facing him and just be held.

Hector must have figured out that was what I wanted because he scooted over towards me and just put his arm loosely around my waist after I put my head on his shoulder. Thank God there was no kissing this time. My mind was relieved that I didn't have to make a choice, but my body was rebelling. My body was still wanting to pull Hector on top of me or crawl on top of him for more of those slow, sensuous kisses and more. A lot more.

I don't think either of us slept.

There were two quick knocks on the door and then Ranger came in. Looked like Ranger had been paying attention yesterday about the whole knocking thing. He still wasn't waiting for an answer though. I was grateful it wasn't yesterday. The body language today was much less intimate but still very friendly. He took one look at me and then one at Hector and immediately started off in Spanish in a very angry tone. It was my turn to watch the verbal tennis match.

"Babe," Ranger said, "what's going on? Your eyes are blood shot and your nose is red. Did he do anything or say anything to you since I saw you last night?" He was looking directly at Hector while he was talking to me.

"Sheez, Ranger. Can't a girl get hormonal once in a while? This weekend has been kind of overwhelming and it got the better of me. Canelo has been a gentleman," I said, mentally crossing my fingers, "and hasn't done one thing to make me cry."

While I had been talking, I sat up in bed with my arms holding my knees. Hector read my body language and sat up, too.

"Has someone else?" Ranger asked. Cripes, he was in over-protective mode this morning.

"No. No one has done anything, I promise. But this weekend has all been a little bit much, you know? I mean first it was camping, which by itself would have been enough to overload me. Then there was my upending in the stream. We can't any of us forget that Aunt Flo is here. And the cherry on top was the snowstorm followed by a power outage. I had kind of expected to be home and waking up in my own bed this morning."

It must take considerable energy to keep up that damned blank face, because he hadn't even tried to put it on this morning. So there we were, the three of us, me hormonal and upset, Ranger in very pissed off mode, and Hector trying to keep up with the conversation and stay out of the line of fire. In all fairness to Hector, he didn't deserve me getting hormonal and he didn't need to have to deal with Ranger's BS either.

Then we were back to the verbal Spanish tennis match. Again. They got done and Ranger's face hadn't changed but Hector looked relieved. Ranger must have explained my explanation to Hector somewhere along the line.

"Babe, it's almost 7:15. We are getting everybody up now. According to the weather report, the roads should be cleared enough for us to get back on the road before 10:00. The kids need to be fed and the vehicles need to be repacked. You going to be OK with that?"

"Of course, I'll be OK. I just had a bad night. How long until oatmeal, or is it scrambled eggs this morning?"

"French toast this morning and about 15 minutes," he said. He knew I loved French toast. He must have talked to Lester or Bobby about it earlier.

"We'll be down in time for breakfast, promise."

Ranger was almost ready to leave when he spotted the long, wide blood stain in the middle of the bed. He looked at it and just sighed as he said, "Anything between you and Hector I need to know about?"

I hadn't noticed the stain on the sheets, so I needed to be clued in. When it was pointed out to me, I gasped.

"Explain."

"Nothing to explain, Ranger. Looks like my tampon's been leaking and I need to change it. I should strip the sheets so I can work on the stain before it sets. It happens to me all of the time. God must just hate me or he just doesn't want me to ever sleep on white sheets. You've seen my sheets, all of them have patterns for a reason. Can you leave now so I can get things started?" I asked, now I was becoming cranky pants.

Ranger and Hector did another of those stupid verbal volleys. When it was over Ranger was looking like he was sucking lemons again and Hector was, well I can't say pleased so much as relieved. Again hearing the words that sounded a lot like 'adult' 'decision' and 'option' came up. At least I didn't think I was hearing 'mia' (mine) being thrown around anymore. Maybe it was OK that adult was being used. We were all adults, right?

One of these days I'd have to learn Spanish just so I'd know what was being said about me.

When Ranger left, I tried to get off the bed. I was fiercely hoping that I wasn't going to leak all the way to the bathroom.

Hector was pulling me to him, he whispered, "That was the problem last night, right?"

"Sort of," I mumbled.

"More than that?" he asked.

I nodded. "Can we talk about it later?"

He agreed and let me go. I went into the bathroom and took care of my business and came out to find Hector stripping the sheets from the bed. He had folded the fitted sheet in such a way as the stain was on top and would be easily treatable. The folded bundle was lying on top of the bed, the rest of the linens and bed things were tossed on to the floor.

Hector turned his back to me and started pulling on the clothes he had on yesterday.

I hadn't thought to take my clothes into the bathroom with me. My modesty was no longer much of a concern at that moment. The man may not have seen it all but he had definitely felt pretty much all of it.

I chose to put my clothes on from the day before. I left Hector's shirt on as I started with the socks and the pants. I was pretty much re-dressed from the waist down. I had no idea what state of dress Hector was in because I hadn't snuck any peeks his direction. I was fighting to keep control of myself, all aspects.

I didn't think that I would need to loosen his shirt and leave it draped over my chest to put the bra on. Nope. I had just whipped the shirt off over my head and dropped it onto the floor when I thought I was going to keep my some privacy and dignity in tact. I was wrong.

No sooner had the shirt hit the floor when there was a single knock on the door as it was being pushed open. No pause, no "are you decent," no "can we come in", nothing, just two bozos storming in and getting a free show. I shrieked and made an attempt to cover my chest with my hands.

Hector raised his voice and said simply, "Out" to Lester and Bobby.

I closed my eyes as I heard voices saying "Shit, man couldn't you have waited for an answer?" "Ranger's gonna kill you" and "Who's worried about Ranger? Man, she's gonna find the knives in the kitchen and use them on us."

I had immediately turned my body so I was facing the back wall and hoped no one else could see anything when Ranger and Tank burst in. Great the Calvary had come and they were late.

"Babe, you OK?" Ranger asked.

"Ah, Steph," began Tank.

Hector said again, "Out. Everyone out."

"Bobby, is there a merit badge for manners? Because if there is, you need to give yours back and think about re-earning it. Now the only people who have a right to be in here slept in here. If you don't answer to the name of either Hector or Stephanie, you need to get the hell out!" I ground out.

Thus began the exodus from the room. The door was finally closed. Hector shoved a bunch of stuff in front of the door to slow down anyone else who might try to come in. I noticed that Hector had gotten about as far in his dressing as I had. From the waist down he was covered but no shirt on yet. I hadn't re-attempted the bra or anything else.

I had nothing to be angry at Hector for but I was furious with the rest of them. I was so angry my entire body was shaking. I hadn't even gotten my breathing back under control.

Hector came over and stood behind me, put his arms just below mine and his head on my shoulder and started to rock me. It felt comforting and nice until we heard someone else try to get into the room. "Out," Hector growled at whoever it was. He was magic at soothing my raw nerves. After a couple of minutes he moved away, he pointed and said, "Clothes."

He put on a couple of under layers and finally a flannel shirt. I got the bra on, camisole and 'my' borrowed flannel shirt. I folded his shirt and went to hand it to him. He shook his head.

"Keep it. Please," he said.

"Sure?" I asked. He nodded back at me and smiled.

"Better now?" he asked.

"Yeah, thanks," I said softly.

He moved closer to me and held me again. It was soft, it was easy and it was comfortable. I laid my head on his shoulder and breathed deeply. I don't know how long we stood there, breathing and standing. I was enjoying just his touch but was craving more. I moved my head from his shoulder and looked into those light brown eyes; he looked straight into mine.

I was feeling like he was a snake charmer and I was the snake.

He looked like he was just getting ready to kiss me when Lester forced his way into the room.

What was it about this place that meant anyone and everyone could come into the bedroom? Did no one have manners anymore? Did no one have any respect for privacy? Was I going to have to call manners expert Emily Post to do a seminar at Rangeman?

Hector's eyes didn't leave mine as he said, "Leave." Hector didn't like to be interrupted no matter what he was doing, I guess. He'd had more than his fill of interruptions and intrusions last night and this morning. So had I.

Lester didn't waste time in English; he wanted his point to be clear to Hector. Lester wasn't going to leave us alone any time soon. Evidently he was the designated search party. Lucky me.

"Beautiful, what's going on?" he asked. "It seems like I keep catching you two in some pretty tight clenches. This is the second really interesting position I've seen in the last two days. I'm not counting the fact you sat in his lap all night last night. You know what you're doing?"

Neither of us had moved from where we had been standing. I put my head back on Hector's shoulder before I spoke.

"Right now I think I am being held by a friend, Lester. I think he is trying to keep me from going off on you and Bobby. I think that he's trying to ensure my good mood," I said sarcasm dripping from my voice. "Why? What do you think I'm doing?"

Lester looked like he had been waiting for this opportunity. Lovely, just lovely. He stalked over to me so he could say directly into my ear, "Actually Steph, it looks to me like you're playing with fire."

That got my attention. That couldn't be right. Could it? I mean, if this was meaning what I thought Lester meant I was going to have to look for starch on sale for my mother, then look for a new job and a new apartment.

Fricking nuts. I really wanted to cry.

I eased what had become like a death grip on Hector. That's not to say I wasn't still holding him on to him, but now he wasn't so much the lifeline he had become.

Hopping back on the magic bus to Denial Land, I blurted out the first thing that came to my mind, "So have I missed breakfast or what?"

Lester laughed, "Nope, we fed the kids oatmeal first. Bobby and Ranger wanted to make sure the adults got something different this morning. I have it soaking but it needs to be made," he looked at his watch, "five minutes ago. Come on you two, let's go."

This time I didn't argue.

Lester wasn't budging from his spot, so I led the charge down the stairs followed by Hector. Lester brought up the rear. Lester didn't want to let me out of his sight. You'd think he we were a couple of sixteen year olds and he'd caught us necking on the living room sofa after curfew or worse.

The kitchen smelled glorious, it was a combination of cinnamon, coffee and the French toast. Oh my. I didn't even have to eat anything. Just standing in the doorway of the kitchen taking in the smells, I closed my eyes moaned. Loudly. Several times.

"Killing me here, Babe," Ranger said by way of good morning.

"Sorry about that. Morning guys," I said. I was not feeling sorry in the least. If I could make them at all uncomfortable, it was worth it right now. They'd all made me uncomfortable at various times this weekend, it was their turn.

I smiled broadly at everyone in the room.

"This smells absolutely amazing. Les, since you've been our cook this weekend, and an amazing one at that, how is it that you haven't caught a girl with your superior culinary skills?" I asked.

"Steph, I don't need to use my 'superior culinary skills' to catch a woman. I have what nature gave me, my charm and my natural good looks," he said in the radio announcer voice.

"Whatever you need to believe Lester."

I sat between Bobby and Tank. I didn't want to have to make a choice sitting between Hector and Ranger and start something between us that would have an even broader audience than last night. At this point everyone knew about the Alpha Male Posturing Bullshit, but I wanted to keep any remaining shows to a minimum.

Breakfast was just as good as it smelled. Because Lester and Bobby had been so intrusive this morning, I decided to be as loud in my appreciation of the food as possible. If a couple of the guys also suffered with it, oh well. It wasn't much for revenge, Ok it was the easiest revenge I could come up with on the spot and there would be no dead bodies involved. Besides I could honestly say it wasn't 'intentional'; if any of them ate with me much at all they knew it happened all of the time.

"After we eat, we need to get the rigs loaded," Bobby said in a strangled voice. "I'm going to make sure the boys get their gear downstairs in a few minutes. Steph after the kids empty their rooms, do you mind double checking them to make sure they got everything?"

"Will do."

Obviously being highly organized is part of the keys of being a successful Boy Scout, because it took no time whatsoever for the guys to get their stuff outside and sorted to appropriate vehicles. Tank and Ranger stripped all the beds and put on clean sheets. Lester cleaned the kitchen. Bobby kept the kids out of trouble. Hector helped me to check the rooms to make sure no one left anything behind.

According to our local weather man, also known as Bobby, it was supposed to clear and warm up this morning. He didn't see any reason for us to wait so, the convoy was organized.

I was going to ride with Ranger. Lester and Hector were together. Bobby and Tank were driving 'alone' meaning no other adults in the vehicle.

Before we took off, Tank took me aside and pressed a small package into my hands. Tank was acting as my guardian angel; too bad he hadn't protected me from Lester and Bobby this morning. Well, I guess he was protecting Ranger and me from my moods by providing medication in the form of dark brown, sweet, goodness known to the rest of the world as chocolate.

"Tank, you are so thoughtful. Thank you," I said.

"I just want to make sure Ranger survives the ride home," he said with a wink.

Jerk. But I can forgive any jerk who is bearing chocolate, well mostly.

The vehicles were loaded, the kids settled in and we hit the road, convoy style again. Seemed that I was always in the vehicle that brought up the rear. At least the kids had plugged in their iPods again so there wouldn't be any unnecessary fighting in the back.

Ranger couldn't get in his 'zone' this morning and I was trying hard not to twiddle with stuff. But now Ranger was fidgeting with all of the controls and acted like he couldn't get comfortable. So not the 'in control' man I knew. Ranger never fidgeted. Not once. Again this was just odd.

Finally he looked over at me and let out a sigh.

"Something on your mind, babe?" I asked him in a teasing tone.

"I'm thinking I shouldn't have let Bobby have this first weekend with you. I should have guarded my time, our time; it would have protected you from those bozos. I'm also thinking that you're horizons have probably been stretched to the breaking point right about now. I am sorry about that, Babe. I really am," he said letting out another sigh.

"You couldn't have done anything about it. Bobby wanted to do his regular spring time trip and needed adults. He had never planned on my clumsiness or my hormones. No one had planned on the weather. I think my horizons just need a couple of days without having to deal with all the guys, you know?" I said.

He took my hand into his and started rubbing it with his thumb. He just smiled. It was a soft gentle smile.

"Ranger, do you want me to drive, you are looking pretty tired. Did you sleep at all this weekend?" I asked.

He didn't answer initially, just kept rubbing his thumb on my hand.

Finally when he spoke it was very quiet. His voice was just above a whisper, but it had an edge to it as he said, "Not much. I slept better before I gave you and Hector blankets the first night. The image of you sleeping so closely to him burned into my brain. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw it. And I kept hearing him ask you not to go, that corked it for me. I've heard my own voice wanting to say the same things to you. Last night I slept a little while you two were on the couch, but not much after you got to the room and not at all after I saw you in the hallway."

Ranger was jealous. Apparently very jealous.

I tried as hard as I knew how to be quiet and not to fidget. I didn't want to know to what level Ranger's frustration and jealousy would take him/us. I was also grateful that he didn't ask what had happened behind that closed door, I really didn't want to have that conversation with anyone.

"I don't see how you survive sleeping on the ground all the time when you do missions and stuff," I said changing the subject some.

"We don't go as often as we used to. Besides we are so tired it wouldn't matter what we sleep on or where," he said.

We drifted into silence for a while.

"You were a good sport this weekend, Babe. I just think someone needed to tell you that."

I was in my own zone and just squeezed his hand and closed my eyes.

"I am just hoping the guys have all had enough of me for a little while. Can you talk to the boss and see if he's OK with me taking a day off to get over this trip? Then 'May' can officially begin."

"I think I can arrange for that. Later today, Bobby's going to have a meeting with the guys to review the trip and see what they might do differently this summer. I don't think you necessarily want to go to that meeting, do you?"

"Can I get a pass on that too?" I asked.

"Sure. Sensitivity isn't a big deal with us, it wasn't all that important in the past. Privacy has never been strong with us either. When we have been in combat mode both sensitivity and privacy are luxuries that we can't afford. When we are in the woods or are outside of Trenton, all of us go back into combat mode, it's just training. I'll have a talk with all the guys; probably time to retain some things."

"Thank you," I said.

He brought the hand he was still holding to his lips and kissed it. Maybe all was going to be right in my world after all.

We rode the rest of the way in silence. OK, we were silent but the kids got bored with their iPods and started making themselves known; we just ignored them.

We did the convoy thing almost all the way to Trenton. Ranger called Bobby and told him he would drop off the convoy and be to the office soon.

Ranger broke the silence with me shortly after that.

"Babe, do you want me to drop you off at your place first? We can leave your bags and have one of the guys can drop them off with your car off later. What do you think?"

Wow. Choices. Ranger seldom if ever gave me choices, usually it was which rock did I want to sit on during surveillance. It didn't take me long to decide.

"Home, please," I said quietly.

Ranger called someone and said, "Bags and car to her place early this afternoon. Knock or call before you bring the bags in. Yes, new rules, respecting her privacy. Make sure she answers the door to you." That was it. I had no idea who he was talking to, but at least I would hear a knock on my door today. I had never thought a knock would be such a lovely sound.

We got back to my building and the kids seemed to return to the land of the living. Ranger told them he would be back shortly, and walked me up to my place. After he did the regular checking for attack dust bunnies, he let me in.

"Get some rest. Talk to you soon, Babe," he said. He gave me a soft, gentle, clingy kiss and then left.

I went into the bedroom, pulled off my shoes and the extra layers and crashed. I was out for the count.

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. I thought that if I ignored it long enough, it would go away. Eventually it did, but then it was replaced by a knock on the door. I decided to ignore that, too. I wasn't really expecting anybody and whoever it was could just come back. The phone began to ring again, I ignored it. And then there was a persistent knocking on the door that was so loud it sounded like the door was going to break apart.

I got off the bed and staggered to the door. "What do you want?" I asked the door using my 'I'm annoyed with whoever you are' voice.

"Steph I've got your stuff. Open up," came Lester's voice.

"Keep your shirt on. I'll be there when I get there," I cranked at him. I was very tempted to start a pot of coffee, go to the bathroom and brush my teeth just to see if I could keep him waiting at the door.

In the end, I caved. I was beyond peeved at Lester for his recent comments and behaviors, but I decided I was the better person. Besides, I didn't want my neighbors calling the police that there was some crazy pounding on my door looking to get in.

I opened the door and let him pass. Lester said, "Where do you want these?"

"Down is good, there isn't much in them," I said.

Lester didn't believe me and walked into my bedroom and put them next to the bed. Hadn't this man heard about privacy or limits yet?

"Lester didn't your mother ever teach you about boundaries? When I said 'down is good' I kinda meant in the living room. I didn't think you'd be ballsy enough to go into my bedroom uninvited."

"Hey, I took you at your word, you didn't seem to have a preference and I thought I'd save you the extra work. Sorry to have offended you," he snorted.

"Les, it's past time to be blunt. What the hell is going on with you? First you try to bait Ranger and me. Then you keep acting like something is going on with Canelo, and we both know nothing can be going on with him. And," I was picking up steam and I knew it, I think he did, too.

Before I could get any further, Lester stopped me.

"Steph, do you know why I am the one to drop off your bags and car?"

I looked at him and shook my head.

He went on, "We need to talk."

He did not just say that. He did not just say 'we need to talk'. Nothing good ever comes from those words, at least not in my world. Shocked I would hear my least favorite words coming from his lips. I just nodded my head.

"Steph, you are wrong about something and it is something big."

"OK. I can deal with that. I have practice at being wrong. I am wrong all of the time. What's new about that?" I asked.

"Canelo isn't who you think he is, or any of us think he is. Shit, I don't want to tell you, he should. I want you to know before the next time you see him so you can reevaluate things for yourself."

Lester did the oddest thing, he sat down and closed his eyes. It looked like he was counting to some high number or something.

'What couldn't Lester tell me? What was so wrong? Is Hector a drug dealer? Is he into kiddie porn? Is he a cross dresser? What could be so awful that Lester has his eyes closed in order to regroup?' I thought to myself.

"No, it's none of those things," he said.

I must have been thinking out loud again.

"Don't keep me hanging here. Is it worse than those things?" I asked. I thought, 'God, I am not ready to hear the answer to this. I am not prepared for any kind of bad news.'

"Steph, he's straight."

Oh God.