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Chapter 5: The End of a Life
For a moment, the moment after he had taken his last breath and realised he could not take another, Dirk had thought he was going to die. Yet Kea suddenly stopped whatever she had been doing and the wind that had been pressing down on him simply disappeared. He slumped to the floor, his wounded back screaming at him in outraged agony at the way he was treating it. He had no energy left, simply slumped against the overhang using it to support his back and stay upright. What would she do now? He had been tossed around like a child's ball. He was totally in her power, helpless as a child.
"I am sorry!" the girl dressed in her drab dull grey dress ran to him and to his utter shock and surprise burst into tears as she ran. "I know I shouldn't! I know I shouldn't!" She continued her voice a begging pleading whimper. "Please don't hurt me. I didn't mean to use it. Honestly, I didn't! Please don't punish me!"
Dirk just sat in shocked silence for a moment, contemplating Kea, searching to understand the changes that had suddenly overtaken her. But he knew he could not allow her to grovel as she was now doing. No woman like her should ever be humiliated like this.
"You do not be in trouble with me, Kea…" He had wanted to add something to her name. Kea just seemed too simple he wanted to set her apart. To show her he respected her and the power she wielded. "My lady Kea," it was better than nothing. "Listen to me. I do not understand why you couldn't move or why you have struck me. But I do know that I can help you. My Lady what do you need?"
"You serve me!" Kea laughed through her almost hysterical tears. "Don't you know what I am? I am marath-damane." When Dirk just continued to look at her his face neutral she apparently realised these words meant nothing to him. "I am one who must be leashed! I kill things, like a fire if I am not controlled I will cause harm and even death. That is why I must be complete. A sul'dam ensures we only use the power the right way. No one is harmed who should not be. We serve as good damane. Kea was a good damane and my sul-dam gave me treats. I would never use it without them. I promise I would not!" Here her voice began to rise again.
With a grunt of pain that he half managed to suppress Dirk pushed himself up the wall of the overhang until he stood erect. Then he carefully reached down and lowered himself onto one knee. He did it slowly and deliberately so that it could not be mistaken for a fall. "Lady Kea, I can help you do what you need. But you have no need to be leashed. I am sure what you did to me moments ago was a mistake and it will not be repeated.
"It won't be!" she assured him raggedly.
"Then, we do never need discuss it again," he replied firmly. "You are in danger here Kea. We are behind the lines. Your people have fallen back and my people as we have seen will try to kill you in revenge. I would not want us to have to kill again."
"I will not channel again until I am complete. I have learnt my lesson," she burst in as though she needed to defend herself.
"That do be a shame" admitted Dirk. "I had hoped you could use the power to disguise us."
"I can only do two things for the sul-dam. I am good at fighting with it and I have a special talent with earth and spirit weaving."
Without wondering about exactly what all this meant feeling the understanding come instinctively and knowing she had to be listened to Dirk simply nodded. Taking that as a command to continue she did so.
"It is not common to be strong in earth like I am" she continued and for the first time she showed a genuine smile. "I can use the power to search through the history of an object. They call it Reading the Roots, though I don't know why. I can see anywhere that, that object has been and find those places." She smiled openly now. "It makes me valuable… expensive."
"Expensive!" Dirk cut her off his voice a shout. "You are a slave then? Property?"
"Oh yes all damane are. But we are prised above all other animals, even the raken that can fly. We are the most useful…"
"Stop! I cannot be hearing this!" Dirk exclaimed shaking his head. "You do speak of yourself as a thing and an animal. Kea, my Lady, you do be a woman and one with amazing gifts at that. Maybe you should use them to serve others, indeed of course you should. But you should not be being a slave! People should honour and protect you so that you can be of greater service. Imagine…"
"No!" she shouted and cut Dirk off in mid sentence. "You know not of what you speak. You must get me back to my people, the Seanchan. Back to the sul-dam so I can be complete. Only then will I be safe and you safe from me. Will you help me like you said?"
He almost refused, but he knew he had asked her how he could help, and now she had told him. He would be as callous as a Tairen, if he did not do as she asked. He nodded his assent once touching the left side of his belt where his sword hilt rested. "Good" she said, letting out a breath she had obviously been holding. "Could you bring the a'dam? I am not allowed to touch one." As she said this last, strange word, she pointed at her silvery leash, now lying on the floor. Dirk looked at it with distaste, but found himself moving to pick it up, as if he had been obeying Kea all his life.
But there recent outbursts had been too loud and Dirk could hear approaching feet and voices. Discovery now could mean the death of Kea or, almost as bad, the need for him to kill again. Not a thought he relished. "People are coming" he hissed in an urgent whisper. "We must leave, please follow me!"
She did so and they quickly moved away from the voices through the light woodland. Kea was not used to travelling either silently or through woods and seemed to have little or no knowledge of wilderness lore. He guided her but he knew they were moving too slowly. Sure enough it was not long until he heard fresh movement, with sounds to match, coming from ahead of them.
"People did hear us shouting at each other and several groups are around we have to hide. As you cannot hide us, I will do my best" he whispered to Kea. Motioning that she should move as quietly and carefully as possible he led her off the natural way leading through the trees. The trail they had been following was simply openings between the trees but they needed to lose these men. He felt frustration as he searched for a good hiding place. This was why he worked in cities instead of the wilderness. You could always hide easily with plenty of people. Smothering his feelings of annoyance he had her lay herself flat against the back of a broad tree he did not know the name of. Then carefully so as to bend as little grass as possible he lowered himself into the long grass and shrubbery nearby.
The voices continued to approach. Dirk was holding his breath and trying to see through the thick grass. If it turned into a confrontation, he did not want to be caught lying on his front, when the blows started falling. Men, some of them boys, entered his view. He could not make out all their individual faces or even their voices. There seemed to be different groups and they stopped and started talking to each other. He picked out words like 'noise' and 'wind' in their discussion. He levered himself up just enough to be able to count how many there were. Then he saw and he dropped himself flat before he started to count.
One of them had been Giro. That meant that one of these groups was Outlook Pleasant men. He couldn't fight them. They had trusted him and spared him. But would they spare Kea? After all he had done today he couldn't let them kill her. He doubted she would come quietly as a prisoner, or at least that they would believe, that a channeller could be safely imprisoned. He held himself flatter than a plank of wood and breathed about as much as one. Still after several moments which seemed to be stretched into hours they spoke again and left.
His relief almost overcame him. Barely feeling the objections of his wounded back he arose and went to get Kea. As he rounded the tree she looked into his eyes and smiled. Something lit inside of him. Her gratitude was right. That was what he lived for. Then he looked past her and he saw Giro looking at him askance.
"Dirk" said Giro slowly; speaking the name at the same time Dirk spoke his. "What are you doing? Don't you know what the women in dark grey are?"
"I know Giro but you must listen to me" replied Dirk. "They do be leashed." He held out the now coiled a'dam in his hands. "Controlled somehow, they do be little more than a sword in the hands of the women who control them."
"A willing sword, I'll be bound!" snapped Giro in response. "Listen Dirk, even if they are only weapons, you don't leave your enemies battle ships alone just because they aren't the generals do you? You know the score Dirk, she is one of them and if she gets back to them they will use her just as surely as before. Damn it Dirk!" he shouted the last three words. "People from Outlook died today; Kelly Wattle and Kenny Steiner, plus his two boys. If she goes free then she will kill again."
Dirk felt sweat beading on his forehead. He could not kill Giro, the man who had given him his first job. This was the man who had been his friend and been the first to offer him the gift of trust.
"Giro, you do be my friend, mayhap my best friend. You know me, Steadysteel, they call me in Outlook. Trust me Giro and leave. I do not want to be fighting you. That is the truth. Yet Giro I won't let you kill her. It would not be right."
His friend grunted and stared him up and down. Dirk had not drawn his sword but there was no doubt, if he did, he could kill Giro. They both knew it.
"I won't kill you Giro. You are my friend and if someone threatened you I would defend you as surly as I am defending her."
"She is threatening me!" snapped Giro, but his voice was much quieter than it had been. He did not want to attract attention which was a good sign. "She threatens us all. The White Tower. Thought at them yet Dirk? When they hear about channellers being 'leashed' and used as weapons? Then what will happen huh? I know, I know. You have no clue and neither do I. But hear me good. When these invaders and the Tower meet it will be awful and I don't want any friend of mine to be in that bloody mix."
"I have no argument but this. Trust me" finished Dirk simply.
"You know I trust ya" muttered Giro. "But this will be it for you in Outlook. I've sent the others away when I saw the top of your head. I almost called out to you, but then I saw her and I thought I'd better not. Lucky for you huh?"
Then after a pause and a considering look at the still silent, and clearly fearful, Kea he added, "Or maybe lucky for all of us."
He held out a hand to Dirk. "Bye Steadysteel. I hope we can meet after all this is done. But I wouldn't show my face too broadly if you know what I mean."
"Dirk nodded. Take my things Giro. I don't want them going to waste. You can make sure the right people get them. They will accept them better from you than a runaway me. You can tell people I died. Now go before you do be missed." So saying Dirk shook his friend's hand and Giro turned and left. Only then did a cord inside Dirk relax. He had been ready to act throughout. If Giro had not chosen right he would have left him unconscious.
"You didn't kill him" said Kea musingly.
"Of course I didn't he do be a close friend. A man I trust! I don't like killing. I am not a killer!"
"For all that you are very good at it," responded Kea. Though her voice betrayed no hint of it, Dirk felt for the first time that Kea was needling him. She was deliberately trying to provoke a reaction or a response of some kind. He did not answer but simply thought over what she had said. He must have learnt how to kill before his new life. He began to wonder and then stopped himself. It could drive him mad if he dwelt on what he would never know. That life was gone and now he reasoned so was this one.