CHAPTER 13
A/N: yaoi-fied: Severus knows Sonia Mukherjee because they're in the same Order – there's nothing more to it :-)
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Not long after his brief but enlightening conversation with Sonia Mukherjee, Harry was summoned by Albus Dumbledore.
"Harry, would you like to join the Order of the Phoenix?" the Headmaster asked.
"I was wondering when you would ask, sir," Harry said with a small smile. "The answer is yes, of course."
Dumbledore looked gratified, beaming at his protégé through his half-moon spectacles.
"In that case, Harry, you are our new member. I am afraid that there is no time for formalities and official ceremonies; but in the meantime, Severus will teach you the talking form of the Patronus, which is the main method of communication within the Order besides Fawkes's feathers. However, Fawkes does tend to be indisposed on a Burning Day, which is why we cannot expect him to be present all the time."
Fawkes raised a leg and scratched his neck thoroughly before pecking at a pile of sesame seeds.
"Er…Professor, perhaps Professor McGonagall or Professor Moody or some other Order member could teach me," Harry suggested delicately.
"I have already informed Severus, Harry, and he has agreed," Dumbledore informed him with a benign smile, "you are married, after all."
Yeah, right, Harry thought sarcastically.
"Okay, fine, good," he said aloud, hoping that he would prove more adept at producing talking Patronuses than mastering Occlumency.
"I'm sure that it will be fine, Harry. Welcome to the Order, my dear boy."
"Thank you, Professor."
Dumbledore rose and patted Harry's shoulder as Harry left.
Arriving at Nessa's portrait, Harry promptly gave her his news.
"I've got to take lessons with Severus. He is to teach me how to produce a speaking Patronus," he told her glumly.
"The pictures in the castle know that you are very good with casting Patronuses. What is there to worry about, young one?" Nessa asked.
"Well…the teacher," Harry said meaningfully.
"Regard it as a challenge to prove to him what you are capable of. Tell me, how is your sketching after your first class? You were so positive about it."
"Well, I still have to wait for the practical part until I can really experiment. I've always scraped away with a quill on normal paper up to now. I want to learn the proper technique, and I have to wait until the next lesson for that."
"Ah. Another heart-to-heart chat," a sneering voice said behind him. Harry moved aside as Severus approached and said the password. Severus had been in a worse mood than usual after his meeting with Voldemort, whose obscene interest in Severus's and Harry's supposedly abusive marriage was sickening. Severus had explained curtly to Harry that Voldemort had undergone so many transformations that he was physically incapable of experiencing sexual pleasure or performing the sexual act. Severus had spoken in a tone which had sounded like it was all Harry's fault.
"I have been charged with the unhappy prospect of contributing to your education," Severus said as they walked inside the room.
"Dumbledore just told me," Harry replied quietly. "What shape does your Patronus take, if I may ask?"
"Ashwinder," Severus answered snappily. A magical serpent whose eggs were a Potions ingredient. Of course. Eggs which were used in Love Potions. How ironic.
"Mine is a-"
"-stag. I saw it during that tedious Quidditch match of yours in your third year. How sentimentally boring," Severus drawled.
"How you can find a happy memory to help you produce a Patronus is frankly amazing," Harry commented, his hackles rising.
"Your amazement does not impress me," Severus remarked.
"Why did you agree to teach me how to produce a talking Patronus?"
"Because the Headmaster asked me to. And since I am slightly more optimistic about your Patronus-casting abilities…"
Harry knew that he was recalling Harry's struggles with Potions and Occlumency.
"Lessons on Thursday nights at nine o'clock in our rooms, and I hope for your sake that you show promise. You were abysmal even in bed," Severus said, closing the door of the hall in Harry's face. Harry stared at the door, very hurt and unhappy at the cruelty of the last sentence. He swallowed down the lump in his throat. Whatever little hope he had for a peaceable interaction between them was extinguished. The remark had been totally uncalled for, to say nothing of extremely mean. Anger boiled within him before turning to suffocating ashes. He pressed his lips together, fighting down his tears. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and chose the Potions laboratory – he was sure he had heard Severus go in there. Severus turned, eyes narrowed dangerously.
"I think I told you never to set your foot inside this room," he whispered.
"And I thought I asked you to treat me with respect!" Harry snarled, drawing out his wand. "Do you expect people to be fantastic in bed when they're being ripped apart against their wishes? How can you expect Hollywood sex if our marriage is so screwed up? Oh, I know that you had no choice. But you could have chosen not to say such a remark! You are a lousy husband, Severus Snape. Protector my ass! And another thing. Do not even dream of bullying me about Patronuses, because I refuse to be taught by you. In the meantime, enjoy the company of my Dad. Expecto Patronum!"
The stag flashed out of his wand-tip, illuminating the dark laboratory with its blinding silver glow. To spite Severus even more, Harry seized a jar of powder, which he knew was harmless, and smashed it onto the floor. The jar could be repaired, but the powder was a lost case. Before Severus could move or speak, Harry walked off, crashing the door closed behind him. Their marriage was appropriately characterised by the slamming of doors, he thought angrily.
In the evening, a few hours after his umpteenth clash with Severus, Harry, fed up of staying in his bedroom most of the time, slipped out into the hall with the art class syllabus and a book on sketching technique. He settled down on the sofa, which was Severus's favourite piece of furniture. Harry didn't care. Hadn't Nessa told him that Severus's rooms were his as well? He was sure that this could be safely applied to at least some of the furniture. Bedroom furniture was another matter altogether, of course, considering that Severus and he had separate bedrooms and beds. What an inspiring marriage, Harry thought bitterly as he opened his book and tried to read. When he heard the door open and Severus come in, he feigned deafness, staring resolutely at the print. Severus approached the sofa. Harry scrupulously avoided looking up. He had made enough efforts and humiliated himself far too many times just for the sake of talking nicely with the man.
"Potter-" Severus began, but Harry interrupted him flatly:
"Don't talk to me. And don't come near me. You can't stand me anyway, so keep at a safe distance, husband of mine."
"I'm going out for a drink," Severus said tersely after a nasty pause.
"Sure. Go ahead. Get laid. I'm sure you'll find someone who can attend to your basic instincts better than I can. I don't give a damn," Harry said, turning the page of his book rather violently. There was a slight tearing sound, as if the page had suffered some damage.
"If you agree to accompany me, then we can Apparate to the bar at the edge of the grounds," Severus said.
Harry stared at him, not believing his ears. Then he rallied himself. It was probably for a practical reason, probably Order-related. It could not possibly be to display themselves in public as a loving couple. Severus would have chosen a wizarding bar for this purpose. But the idea was absurd. Severus would never think of public displays, staged or not staged.
"Is the Order meeting up there? I doubt we're going out to toast my joining the Order, are we?"
"No, the Order is not meeting there," Severus said testily.
"Uhm…Please give me five minutes to change," Harry said, jumping up and darting to his bedroom.
Severus Snape was not an impulsive man. He had found married life worse than unmarried life so far. Harry Potter was an unmitigated nuisance, showing off his Parseltongue abilities and daring to set foot into his rooms with his friends. True, Severus had told him grudgingly that he could bring his friends along, but he regarded it as a violation of his sanctified quarters. However, seeing Harry's strong reaction to his remark concerning the consummation of their bonding had not left him unaffected. The young man had been seething with rage. But what had decided him was the amazing Patronus. No one could choose the shape of his or her Patronus. And Harry carried the memory of his father in his heart and the memory of his mother in his eyes. He was far more sensitive than James Potter or Sirius Black. He still had difficulties controlling his emotions, but producing a fully-fledged Patronus when he was so upset showed a lot of promise. Severus was starting to acknowledge that he was married to someone whom it was worth getting to know better. And there were little things about the young man which he was only just beginning to notice. The way Harry tried to flatten his hair when he was nervous and tense. The narrowing of his green eyes when he was angry. And his kindness. He could not imagine James Potter hanging around with someone like Luna Lovegood, for instance. Or trying to make an effort to get to know him, Severus Snape, better. Or showing that he cared when Severus experienced pain because of the Dark Mark…
"I'm ready," Harry's voice interrupted his thoughts.
Severus turned around and looked at him. Harry's slight figure was wrapped in a cloak. It was cool outside.
"You may want to use an Ear-warming Charm in winter," Severus said a little stiffly.
"Did you ever get an inflammation of the middle ear?" Harry asked.
"Yes. It is most disagreeable. Luckily, wizarding remedies are very quick."
There was an awkward silence after this succinct exchange.
Severus strode towards the door, opening it. He stood back to let Harry pass before him.
Nessa the snake watched their cloaked figures pensively before coiling tightly around her pestle and napping.
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