Strangelove

Author's Note: Ok! You, the fanfiction readers have spoken and I have conceded your demands! There will be a second chapter for Strangelove! Because, to paraphrase a certain episode title of the show we all find so "strangely lovable"- sometimes, we can (and should!) get what we want...

Anyway, the second chapter became mandatory after I finally figured out what this uncharacteristic story was really about. It's not sex- although admittedly we're all enjoying that... To me, it's about being used. It's about no one seeing you for who you really are, let alone wanting anything to do with it! It's about needing something in your life that's real and honest and something that's yours- your choice. And yes, sometimes it's about saying the hell with everyone else and who they expect you to be... and just going for what's right for you, even if no one gets it!

So, I'd like to specially dedicate this story to anyone who's ever felt this way... Even though it may seem like it, you are not alone... And it's also dedicated to my online "fanfic coven"- B, W, and A... Thanks for not being "scared to tell the truth"!

Ok... now on with it... You all know the "read and review" drill by now...

Thank you all for listening to me rant!

dorothy

Chapter 2

Almost a month after her fateful 17th birthday, Jude walked up to her front porch, escorted eagerly by her partner for that night who limply held her left hand. Faceless, he leaned in for a kiss, which she broke off quickly.

"Curfew" she lied easily.

"I understand. I'll call you." he promised, before disappearing anonymously into the night.

Jude entered her vacant home. It was just after 1:00 AM. She sat by the window. He knew she had a date that night. He always called then. Jude waited for his expected signal.

When the phone rang, she immediately reversed course, heading out again under the black cover of darkness. Driving quickly, she rapidly reached the comparatively small, but luxurious house at the end of the secluded road, where her lover resided.

As always, the second her feet reached the portal, Tommy threw open the door, dragging her inside. No other greetings, no preliminary conversation ever occurred between them. Words were superficial and superfluous.

Tonight, Tommy's hands merely grabbed her body, shoving her hard against the wall. He kissed her with brutal force. Both ablaze from the instance their eyes met, his hands moved under her shirt, stroking and then squeezing her breasts. Clothes scattered in the hallway, as they moved automatically to his bedroom.

Jude flashed a knowing smile at him, teasingly communicating her intension with her eyes. She jumped on him, carelessly and deliberately knocking his naked form onto the bed. Her hands and lips traced the now familiar contours of his body, feeling his tension mount. When he neared the breaking point, she straddled him, impaling him willingly between her creamy thighs. Again, their hips shifted and locked, easily finding their joint and completely perfect rhythm. Bodies moved in ravenous synchronicity as they sought their release; it was heralded by the guttural screams emerging in concert from both their throats.

Temporarily satiated, Jude's nude figure collapsed besides Tommy's. Since her birthday party, these assignations occurred three or four times each week. No one else suspected; no one else was close enough to either of them to see it. On the outside, nothing changed. They worked together with no more or less success than they had ever had. They shared no plans and made no promises. Both realized the vapid emptiness of those, just as both were fully cognizant of the risks of their affair. Neither of them cared. All that mattered was that in these delicious, so illicit moments, everything else disappeared.

Jude now tolerated her duplicity better, no longer struggling to reconcile her true self with her carefully construed public image. Enjoying her hypocrisy, she eagerly embraced the role Darius scripted for her, down to the pre-planned dates he insisted on with wholesome male celebrities. She always played it cool, never offering them more than a single chaste kiss, and made sure that Tommy knew about these evenings. He always summoned her afterwards, taking her even more fiercely, re-establishing his dominance. Jude thrived on this, lived for it, knowing at least at that time, to this one person, she was worth the danger and the effort.

Tommy too cherished their liaisons. He too was tired of his image, of icing his emotions. With Jude, all the inhibitions, all the cherished controls ingrained in being "Cool Tommy Q" were stripped away. For the first time, he welcomed this. It was the only time in his life he felt genuinely alive and fully honest- completely himself.

Neither knew how long this affair could or would continue. All they understood was that neither of them would be the person who stopped it. However, Tommy and Jude knew that in their world, in the famous lives they chose, nothing could ever be permanent, nor were secrets ever kept. Love, commitment, and forever would remain mere foreign terms, always alien, despite everything they shared and felt.

For now, flesh met again and again in the night, feasting endlessly, desperately trying to fill the bottomless void. They knew that this could be their last time, and all their nights together would have to sustain them for eternity.

Just as the outside darkness threatened to slip away and dawn's rays illuminate truth, Jude reluctantly returned to her emotionally barren existence, leaving Tommy to his.

Both could only await hopefully the possibility of a next time.