A/N: Thanks again to oscarxena for the ideas! It's hard coming up with songs to go with my ideas for stories, and it's good to get a little help every once in awhile:D

Disclaimer: I do not own HP or "I Get a Kick Out of You." J.K. and Frank Sinatra do.

I get a kick every time

I see you standing there before me

Hermione was in such a foul mood. She was eight months pregnant, and had never felt so disgusting in her entire life.

Yeah, she constantly listened to everyone tell her how beautiful she looked, and how she was simply glowing, and how lucky she was to be having a baby. But she didn't feel that way. Not one bit. She felt fat, ugly, and undesirable. She stood in the closet in front of the full length mirror, wearing only her underwear and a maternity tank top. She sighed as tears filled her eyes. I may never come back from this…

She heard her husband's key turn in the lock. She wiped her eyes quickly and rushed to put on a pair of shorts. He walked into the room as soon as she was frantically pulling them up.

"Good afternoon—" he broke off as he saw her rushing to hide her body. He looked at her, confused. "Sweetie, what are you doing?" he asked, stepping toward her.

"Nothing, just trying to get dressed," she said coolly.

"Why? As if I haven't seen you without clothes before…" he grinned and motioned to her belly. She didn't return his smile. His face fell. "What's wrong?" he asked firmly, stepping into the doorframe of the closet, not letting her leave. She merely looked at him with annoyance written all over her face.

"Nothing, Severus, now if you could please get out of my way," she snapped, trying to push him away. He didn't budge.

"Hermione, why on earth were you trying to hide your body from me? I know that's what you were doing; I'm not blind," he stated.

"I-I-" she stammered, not really knowing what to say. She didn't want to sound stupid for worrying. Her eyes welled up and she turned away from him. He stepped into the closet, bewildered. She covered her belly the best she could, wrapping her arms around it.

"Hermione, what's this all about?" he whispered, putting his hands over hers on her belly. She jerked out of his reach and spun around.

"Severus, stop! Stop treating me like I am a gorgeous princess that is worthy of your affections!" she screamed, pushing past him while he was caught off guard. She ran out of the closet and into their bedroom. He ran out after her and stopped her from pacing.

"You are my gorgeous princess, 'Mione!" he insisted, squeezing her shoulders.

"Oh Severus, please. Look at me! I'm a fucking cow!" she said loudly, holding her arms out beside her and looking down at herself, "I am disgusting! I'm fat, I'm ugly, I have stretch marks that will probably never go away, I don't know how you could ever even THINK about having sex with me again!!!" she said, looking down, crossing her arms, and starting to cry.

Severus just stood there, dumbstruck. What in the bloody hell is she talking about? She has never looked more gorgeous to me; for God's sake, she's carrying my daughter! However, Severus remembered Harry mentioning something to him about Ginny having the same outburst when she was pregnant with their son, Caleb James. He stepped to Hermione slowly, lifting her chin with one finger. She avoided his eyes for a second, but eventually they connected.

"Hermione Jean Snape. Listen to me." He waited until he was sure she was listening and continued. "You are my wife, and I love you with every inch of my heart and soul. You are beautiful and you always will be."

"But Severus, I am so fat," she sighed, "it wasn't like I was skinny before, but now I may be even chunkier than I was then. I won't even go into the details about the stretch marks," she said, biting her lip.

Severus couldn't help but roll his eyes and grin. She looked at him murderously.

"Hermione. Don't you get it? I couldn't care less if you were this big all the time. I don't care about your stretch marks. I don't care about any of it. You are the sexiest woman on the face of the planet, pregnant or not. Every time I see you, I just want to shower you with kisses and smother you with hugs. You turn me on constantly. Seeing you just makes me want to melt into your arms. That hasn't changed since the day I fell for you and it never will. Forever, I will be yours," he said, putting his hand on her cheek. She looked up at him and gave him a small smile.

"You really mean that?" she asked, looking into his eyes.

"Yes, of course. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it," he whispered, leaning in to kiss her. She kissed him back and smiled against his lips.

"Do I really turn you on?" she inquired.

He gave her a very Potions Master-ish look and smirked. He slipped his hands around her waist and pulled her tank top over her head and threw it over his shoulder, then kissed her neck seductively.

She threw her head back and whispered, "I'll take that as a yes."

Then I suddenly turn and see

Your fabulous face

tbc

Thanks again for the idea, oscarxena! Please review!! Love, love!

-r