He once was the ace
Of New York's Major Case
But since Goren came in
His star has now dimmed
And Jimmy's just one more pretty face.
Goren's less than objective perspective
Inspires new heights of invective
Though his solve rate's astounding
He leaves Deakins' head pounding
And longing for a less quirky Detective.
After watching them week after week
This answer I desperately seek
If Goren were to nibble on his ear
Or offer to buy him a beer
Which would most flummox ol' Deak?
I know there are people who hope
That Goren and Eames will elope
But the assignment reshuffles
Would cause scheduling kafuffles
Driving Deakins to the end of his rope.
Deakins deserves major praise
For the calm he portrays
You don't suppose Cragen
Wouldn't turn raging pagan
Dealing with Goren's displays?
With each Goren excess
Does Deakins' patience grow less
Or do you think
He's just taken to drink
In order to combat the stress?