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Black Vinyl

"Madame Bones," Kingsley shouted. "Take a look at this."

"'Shacklebolt, we will be robbing the Greengrass family on the first of August.'" She read slowly. "'Ha, ha, ha, there is nothing you can do to stop us. Ho, ho, ho, suckers.' You're sure this is real?"

"Fairly sure."

"Hmmm."

"We've got 'em," Kingsley said with a satisfied smile. "We've got 'em."

"Maybe," Madame Bones said slowly. "I wouldn't count on that until they're in a holding cell and under Potter Wards."

IIIIIIIIII

"Harry," Hermione began. "Do you think our books have been delivered yet?"

"Should be," he agreed. "Why?"

"Could you pick them up and take them home?" She looked up at him with puppy dog eyes. "Please?"

Harry frowned and just looked at her.

"Luna and I need a bit of girl time," she leaned forward to whisper into his ear. "Please, Harry."

"Fine," he sighed.

"Thank you, Harry." She hugged him and gave him a quick kiss. "I'll meet you at the Leaky Cauldron?"

"Is there anything else?"

"Um… money?"

Harry laughed as he pulled out his wallet. "Oh woe is me, I work and I work and then my wife spend it all. Woe is me."

"My pay is deposited into your account, too," Hermione protested. "Stop laughing at me."

He smiled at her expression and kissed her on the forehead. "Here, will this be enough?"

"Could I get some Galleons, too?" She said in a small voice.

"Why don't I just give you the bag?" He suggested. "And you can give me whatever you have left."

"Thank you, Harry."

"Just be sure to get Luna something nice," Harry replied. "Deal?"

"Deal," she agreed. "I'll see you soon."

"At the Cauldron or back at home," Harry agreed.

IIIIIIIIII

"So that's the plan," Elizabeth said to the group of assembled Dark Bunnies. "We help master's friends, we come back, master rewards us all."

"Um."

"Yes?"

"We still haven't heard back from the Fox and the Hound have we?"

"No," Elizabeth said mournfully. "We locked their invitation up in our safe and everything."

"Well… master's friends are their arch foes aren't they?"

"What's your point?"

"We could ask them to pass on the invitation."

"Brilliant," Gretchen cut in. "I'm sure master will reward us even more if we manage that."

"New plan," Elizabeth said. "We ask master's friends to help, then we help them, then we come back and master rewards us."

"Yay," the Dark Bunnies all cheered.

IIIIIIIIII

"Why are we in an underwear store Hermione?" Luna asked with a happy smile. "Do you want me to model for you?"

"No Luna."

"Then will you model for me?" She added hopefully.

"No."

"Well?"

"I'm buying something for Harry."

"Harry wears women's underwear?"

"It's for me to wear and him to enjoy," Hermione explained.

"Oh… what about this one?"

"A thong?"

"Uh huh."

"Remember what I said with make up?"

"Less is more?"

"That's right," Hermione said proudly. "With lingerie the reverse is often true. It isn't what you show, it's what you don't show."

"Oh… thank you, Hermione."

"Happy to help, Luna."

"I think this one would look good on you," Luna said happily. "What do you think?"

"Better then the last one."

"And I want to try this one on," Luna said cheerfully.

"Um… a black vinyl school girl uniform isn't… uh…"

"But I think it'll look good on me."

"You can try it on," Hermione allowed. "And we'll see."

"Yay."

IIIIIIIIII

Harry made a quick stop at the bookshop in Diagon on his way home from the bank. "Excuse me."

"What can I do for you Mr. Potter?"

"I was hoping that you might have a book on library spells?"

"Library spells?" He asked flatly.

"Spells for libraries," Harry explained. "For cataloguing books, that sort of thing."

"Ah… I do have such a book."

"Where could I find it?"

"In my back room," the man said with a smile. "Don't happen to have a copy for sale though."

"Oh." Harry deflated.

"Any spells you need to know?"

"A spell to locate a book or subject you want, a spell to shelve books, and a spell to catalogue books."

"Shouldn't be a problem," he said thoughtfully. "Let me copy them out for you on a piece of scrap paper. Do you still want the book? I could order you a copy."

"Please," Harry agreed. "And thank you."

"Not a problem Mr. Potter."

IIIIIIIIII

"There he is," Gretchen whispered.

"He's alone," Elizabeth replied.

"We could follow him," one of the other girls suggested. "Until he meets up with master's other friend."

"Good thinking," Elizabeth said firmly. "Let's go." They group followed Harry up Diagon alley and watched as he walked into the twin's store.

"Now what?" Gretchen asked.

"Now we wait," Elizabeth said firmly.

IIIIIIIIII

"Harry's not there yet," Luna said to her friend. "Now what do we do?"

"We… I see him coming this way," Hermione said. "Ok, remember what you need to do."

"Take these things back to your apartment and hide them in your trunk."

"Thanks, Luna."

"What are friends for, Hermione?"

"How much time do you need?"

"Not long," Luna said slowly. "How about we meet in one of the shops?"

"Ok Luna," Hermione agreed. They split up and Hermione made a beeline for Harry. "Over here."

"Hermione," Harry said with a smile. "Where's Luna?"

"She's just dropping a few things off," Hermione replied. "What do you want to do now?"

"I…" Harry cut off when a group of Dark Bunnies surrounded them. "Can I help you ladies?"

"You guys are hunting the Fox and the Hound aren't you?" Gretchen asked.

"Yes," Harry agreed slowly. "Why?"

"Do you think you could pass a message along?"

"What message?"

"We're holding a celebration for Peter the Dark Enforcer of the North," Elizabeth explained. "And we were hoping that they could attend."

"I'll pass it along if I have the chance."

"Thank you," Elizabeth said politely.

"Um… aren't you the girls that went to Neville's party with Ron?"

"Yep," Gretchen agreed.

"Oh," Hermione said weakly.

"Well, now that's we've got the small talk out of the way. It's time to get to the reason we needed to meet with you," Elizabeth said professionally.

The girls drew their wands and an opaque sphere came into existence around the young couple.

"Bwahaha," Gretchen laughed sadistically, "the only way you can get out is to overwhelm the wards with a massive amount of orgone energy. Bwahaha… suffer."

"We done here?" One of the other Bunnies asked.

"We're done here," Elizabeth agreed. "Have a nice day Harry, Hermione."

"Yes, don't hesitate to call us if you need anything." Gretchen added, "bye."

"What do you suppose they meant by orgone energy?" Harry asked.

"Um." Hermione blushed, this wasn't how she expected things to happen but needs must, she told herself. "I think…"

"And we're out," Harry said as the wards collapsed. "Interesting ward if a bit simplistic. You were saying?"

"Never mind," Hermione sighed. "You think Ron knew he was going to Neville's party with a couple of Dark Witches?"

"Not a chance," Harry laughed. "We can never tell him."

"Pity… I'd have loved to see the look on his face after we found out. So, you think the Fox and the Hound are going to the party?"

"I think there's a better then average chance."

"Ok."

IIIIIIIIII

"Master," Elizabeth said as she led the group into Ron's inner sanctum. "We helped your friends and asked them to pass on an invitation to the Fox and the Hound. Will you reward us now?" She asked eagerly. "Did we do good? Huh did we did we did we?"

"Yes you did," Ron agreed. "Lingua Landica."

Elizabeth started screaming and screaming until her lungs were emptied of oxygen. Collapsing to the ground she began shuddering as Ron held the spell. "Thank you master," she panted as he let off. "Oh god, thank you master."

"Another new one?" Gretchen asked eagerly.

"Yep."

"Me next?" She begged. "Please master."

"Fine," Ron agreed. "Come closer."

IIIIIIIIII

Luna spent a few minutes modelling her new lingerie in the mirror and was more then a bit tempted to wait until her loves returned to give Harry a personal show. "Hermione wouldn't like it if I spoiled her surprise," Luna told herself firmly. "And this is not the time to antagonize her… not after the concession she made anyway." She took one last look at her reflection before reluctantly changing back to her normal clothing and hiding the purchases in Hermione's trunk.

With an unhappy sigh, she left the apartment and wandered off in search of Harry and Hermione."

IIIIIIIIII

"So we're going to meet with Luna then?" Harry asked.

"Yes," Hermione agreed. "She said she'd meet us in one of the shops."

"No more detail then that?"

"There aren't many shops," Hermione pointed out. "I… urk." She cut off when she felt a pair of hands caress her bum.

"Guess who?"

"You're supposed to put your hands over my eyes Luna," Hermione sighed.

"Really?" Luna frowned in confusion. "That doesn't seem very fun."

"No, you see the point it… never mind."

"Ok."

AN: The ongoing list of people that contributed to this fic without whom, it would not have been nearly as good . . . one might go so far as to say it would be quite bad: nonjon, Ed Becerra, ausfinbar, David Wangen, neil.reynolds, dogbertcarroll, hattenjc, the caitiff, AlanP, Lone Wolf, meteoricshipyards, Shawn Pickett, Morris Rague, luinlothana, Treck, Drake, David Brown, Moshehim, Arthur Hansen, Marneus Calgar, Goblin214, Chris LeBron, khadon99, Shawn Pickett, tekobaka, Freddie, Musings of Apathy, Brian Arcis, and everyone else on my yahoo group. They gave me scenes, ideas, and all sorts of other things. Tell me if I missed you so I can add to this list. Another thanks goes to meteoricshipyards who wrote the majority of the continuing adventures of the tentacle monster as well as several others. Anything I wrote on that sub plot was fairly minor so kudos. And still another goes to neil.reynolds who wrote a large number of scenes. Yet another goes to The Resident who was good enough to do a bit of editing and caught several of my mistakes.

Omake by moshehim
"Hmmm..." mused Harry. "What else do you have there, Hermione?" he
turned to look inside her trunk.

Hermione blushed, and rushed to prevent him from going through her
(and Luna's) purchases, but the damage was already done.

"Black vinyl, huh?" said Harry, smirking. "school-girl uniform? Two
sizes too small? I didn't know you were into kink, 'mione. Still,
why don't you try it on?"

"Okay." said Hermione, in a small voice.

"Hey!" said Luna, as she walked in. "You can't wear this, it's
mine!" Then she reconsidered. "Well, if Hermione's stealing my
clothes, then I'll just have to go without, won't I?"