Disclaimer: TO those about to ROCK.

Teamwork

"Mum?" Tonks asked slowly.

"What is it Nymphadora?"

"Did I ever have a mark on my inner thigh?"

"Yes you did," she replied. "It was one of the first things you removed when you were first learning to use your powers . . .why?"

"No reason," Tonks replied sickly. "Thanks mum."

"No problem dear," Andromeda replied with a shrug, wondering why her daughter wanted to know about a simple vaccination scar that nearly every child in the magical world had. Deciding it didn't matter, she dismissed the thought and went about her business.

IIIIIIIIII

"Ready to write that article Luna?" Hermione asked.

"Uh huh," Luna agreed. "You write it and I'll convert it into something that normal people can understand."

"So long as you help with the research," Hermione said with a smile.

"Of course."

"What are you writing?" Harry asked.

Hermione leaned into him as she replied. "Cosmetic charms for self defence."

"Like using a mirror to look around corners?" Harry asked.

"A mirror isn't a charm Harry."

"S'the only thing I could think of," Harry admitted.

"But it's also something we could include in the article," Luna said brightly. "Thank you Harry."

"No problem Luna."

The two girls spent the next few hours researching before Hermione was confident that she had enough material.

"I'm still not sure about these last charms," Hermione said with a frown.

"Why not?"

"Well . . . they're not really in use anymore are they?" Hermione asked. "Who's going to use a hair removal charm that hurts when they can use one that doesn't?"

"No one that isn't into that sort of thing," Luna said with a smile. "But knowing the newer version should help with the older ones."

"I guess," Hermione agreed. "How's this look?"

"A bit too technical," Luna said with a frown.

"That's what you're here for," Hermione said with a grin. "Right?"

"Right," Luna agreed cheerfully. "You know Hermione, we make a good team."

"Yeah."

"And there must be a lot of things in the world that we can team up on besides writing for 'Teen Witch.' Like, say . . ."

"No," Hermione said automatically.

"You don't like Bridge?" Luna asked in disappointment.

"I don't know how to play Bridge," Hermione said in surprise. That wasn't even close to what she expected.

"I can teach you then," Luna said in delight.

"Ok."

"And after that, we can surprise Harry in the bedroom and show off our team work."

"No Luna," Hermione sighed. That on the other hand, was pretty much exactly what she expected.

"Harry doesn't know how to play either then?" Luna said innocently.

IIIIIIIIII

"Hey mum," Tonks began.

"What is it now Nymphadora?"

"What color was my hair before I started morphing?"

"Blond," her mother said immediately. "Just like your Aunt Narcissa, it was so cute the way you turned it pink to match your stuffed bunny when you were four."

"Oh . . . uh mum, this may seem like a strange question but . . ."

"What is it dear?"

"If I were a time traveler that came from the future and lost my memory and morphed back into a child, you'd tell me right?"

Andromeda just stared at her daughter with an unreadable look.

"Right?"

"Of course dear," Andromeda agreed. "Whatever makes you happy." She made a note to have a little chat with her old friend Amelia, it seemed that her baby wasn't able to cope with the stress of being an Auror.

"And Mum?"

"Yes dear?"

"If you were in a German 'scheisse' video, you . . . you'd tell me, right?"

Andromeda just stared at her daughter with an unreadable look. "Sure, hon."

IIIIIIIIII

"Hermione?"

"What is it Luna?"

"Do you know what the definition of Monogamy is Hermione?" Luna asked brightly.

"What is it Luna?" The other girl sighed.

"Having one wife too few," Luna chirped. "By strange coincidence, Bigamy has the same meaning."

"No it doesn't Luna."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

"But this Dictionary says that . . ."

"Let me see that." Hermione snatched the book out of the other girl's hands. "Hmmmm . . . published by . . . Lovegood Press huh?"

"My three greats grand father put it out," Luna added helpfully.

"Here's your book back Luna," Hermione said as she handed it back. "Sorry I grabbed like that."

"That's ok Hermione," Luna said with a dreamy smile. "In fact, you can feel free to grab anything of mine at any time you feel like it."

"That's ok Luna," Hermione replied quickly.

"I insist," Luna said brightly. She grabbed Hermione by the wrist and brought the other girl's palm up. "Oooooh, squeeze Harder."

"Luna . . ." Hermione's eyes opened in shock when she noticed Harry watching the show. "This isn't what it looks like."

"Don't mind me," Harry said with a smile. "Just continue what you're doing."

"Thank you Harry," Luna chirped. "My turn?"

"I gotta . . . I need to check on dinner," Hermione gasped.

"Ok."

"About that," Harry said with a grin. "Your mum called, she was hoping to have us over again."

"That means we can keep playing," Luna said happily.

"Urk."

"Actually," Harry interjected. "I have to borrow Hermione for a few minutes."

"I'll wait out here until you're done borrowing her," Luna offered happily.

"Thank you for being so considerate Luna," Harry replied.

"Do I get a say in this?" Hermione asked.

"If you want to stay in here with Luna then . . ."

"Never mind," Hermione said quickly. "I was just asking. Let's go Harry."

Luna grinned as she watched them go, she couldn't wait for her turn.

IIIIIIIIII

Tonks checked her makeup again and resisted the urge to sigh in frustration. She was going on another date with Tim and this time, she told herself, she was going to break up with him. It just wasn't fair to either of them to keep this relationship going. Tim was a great partner and a great friend but he just wasn't . . . just wasn't what she was looking for in a boyfriend.

IIIIIIIIII

Luna was waiting when Harry and Hermione emerged dressed and ready for a night in the muggle world.

"Going to visit your parents now?" Luna asked.

"Yes," Hermione agreed. "Would you like to come Luna?"

"You want to introduce me to your parents?" Luna asked happily. "I'd love to but I'm afraid that there's something I have to do with father. Could we do it another time?" She ended hopefully.

"Sure Luna," Hermione agreed. "Have fun with your father."

"I will," Luna agreed.

They made the trip to Hermione's parents house and Jill took charge of her daughter and ushered her into the kitchen as soon as they arrived.

"Don't worry about them," Phil advised. "Jill just wants to have a little chat."

"Ok," Harry agreed.

"Harry," Phil began. "You may be wondering why we asked you two to come here tonight."

"Not really," Harry replied. "Just figured you wanted to spend some time with your daughter."

"Look . . . Harry, um . . ."

"Yeah?" Harry asked.

"This may seem like an odd request for a father to make but could you keep Hermione . . . um . . . occupied for the next few days?" He said with a cough. "However you can?"

"Occupied?"

"So she doesn't leave your apartment," he continued. "It's really important. You have to understand that she's a good girl, it's just that . . . well . . . let's say no more about it."

"If you like." Harry wished he had some idea what this conversation was about.

"Now, why don't you tell me about that game you play with brooms . . . Quaditch wasn't it?"

"Quidditch," Harry corrected automatically. "Well . . . I'm a seeker and . . . "

IIIIIIIIII

"Hello Cousin Gretchen," Luna said happily. "Father and I are happy you could have dinner with us tonight."

"I wouldn't miss it," Gretchen said. "You two are the only family I have in England after all . . . well, aside from master and the others of course."

"Of course," Luna agreed.

"So, have you made any progress with your loves?"

"I think so."

"Oh?"

"Hermione wants to propose to me before we do anything kinky," Luna said with a sigh.

"Do you want me to have master do something about that?"

"No, there's something special planned for my birthday and I don't want to spoil the surprise." Luna confided with a naughty grin.

"Ok."

"So tell me about the baby," Luna asked. "Did those potions I sent help with the morning sickness?"

"They did," Gretchen agreed.

IIIIIIIIII

"I have some exciting news to share with you Hermione," Jill began. "It's about your prospective sibling."

"Is there something wrong?" Hermione asked in concern.

"No, it's just . . . well . . . I should have put an 's' on the back of that."

"You mean?" Hermione squeaked.

"Triplets," Jill sighed. "It's a common side effect of the spell we used."

"That's wonderful mum," Hermione cheered.

"That's one way of looking at it," she said dryly. "Hand me the salt."

"Yes mum," Hermione agreed.

"How's your cooking coming along dear? Is Harry still doing it all?"

"About that," Hermione began.

"Yes?"

"Mum," Hermione said with a lazy smile. "Could you teach me how to make a pie for Harry?"

"Fine dear," she agreed. "Why?"

"Well . . ." she began with a wicked grin.

"Never mind," Jill said quickly. "On second thought, I'm perfectly happy not knowing the details of my daughter's sex life."

"But mum," Hermione protested. "I really want to brag about this."

"Fine," Jill agreed. "So long as I can reciprocate, for starters there's this thing your father does with his . . ."

"Stop," Hermione shouted. "You win mum."

"I always do hun and I always will," she said fondly. "Youth and enthusiasm are no match for old age and treachery."

IIIIIIIIII

Tonks returned to the apartment after the date. She and Tim shared a hug, which was more difficult for her than for him. She said goodnight and went into her place alone. As she lay in bed in the quiet dark (thankful Harry had put up silencing wards) and felt depressed.

Tim was a great guy, and an excellent Auror, but they didn't have much in common. Beyond work, every topic she had tried had fizzled out. She admitted it to herself: this relationship wasn't working out. It just . . . wasn't easy to give him the bad news. Resolving to end it the next day, Tonks closed her eyes and went to sleep.

IIIIIIIIII

At St. Mungo's, two of the few 'old guard' Death Eaters were sneaking in to break out one of their comrades. While they weren't any older then most of the other recruits, their ideals were more in keeping with what had brought their parents to the Dark Lord's service.

"You know, it does kinda look like he's happy here. Why don't we just leave him to enjoy himself."

"Actually it looks like he's trying to scream in pain. Also, his eyes make me think of all those picture of muggles who've been tortured. You know, the ones they show us to psych us up before a raid? It's like he's begging for salvation."

"Nah, it's just your imagination."

The two Death Eaters turned and started to walk away. "Besides, he was always a bit of a prick while he taught us."

Weren't you in Slytherin?"

"Yeah...he was still a prick though."

IIIIIIIIII

They four of them finished their meal and Hermione gave her mother a kiss goodbye before leaving. "Talk to you later mum."

"Goodbye dear," she said fondly. "You two have fun."

Hermione took possession of Harry's arm as they walked down the street.

"Wanna take a stroll then?" Harry asked as she snuggled up to his arm.

"Yeah," Hermione sighed. "Let's just . . . let's just walk up the road a little while and look at the stars."

"Ok," he agreed pulling her close. They walked up the the street until they came upon a small market.

"Dad used to buy me drinks here when I was a girl," Hermione sighed. "Always got me juice because ice cream is bad for my teeth . . . do you have any pounds on you Harry?"

"A few," he agreed.

"Could . . . could we get something to drink?"

"Sure," Harry said with a smile. "Come on."

Hermione skipped to the back and pulled two bottles out of the fridge and then skipped back and presented them to Harry. "Hope you like grape."

"Never had it before," Harry admitted. "Didn't exactly have much chance to try new things when I was growing up."

"Oh . . . yeah."

"Come on," he said as he led her to the check out line. Harry paid for the drinks and turned back to find Hermione frozen. "What's wrong?"

"The paper." Hermione stared down at the newspaper with an evil grin. "Look at this Harry."

"Body believed to be suspected embezzler Vernon Dursley found floating in a sewage tank," Harry said with a grin. "Couldn't have happened to a better guy."

"The one next to it."

"Tenth annual telemarketers trade show and convention?"

"Can we go and ruin their lives Harry?" Hermione begged. "Please?"

"I don't know . . ."

"You know that thing in chapter ten?" Hermione asked. "The thing I said I'd never do?"

"What about it?"

"You do this for me and I'll do that for you," Hermione purred. "Whenever you want."

"Whenever I want?"

"Whenever you want."

"Deal," Harry said after a moment of thought.

AN: The ongoing list of people that contributed to this fic without whom, it would not have been nearly as good . . . one might go so far as to say it would be quite bad: nonjon, Ed Becerra, ausfinbar, David Wangen, neil.reynolds, Ben Russell-Gough, dogbertcarroll, hattenjc, the caitiff, AlanP, Lone Wolf, meteoricshipyards, Shawn Pickett, Morris Rague, luinlothana, Treck, Drake, David Brown, Moshehim, Arthur Hansen, Marneus Calgar, Goblin214, Chris LeBron, khadon99, Shawn Pickett, tekobaka, Freddie, Musings of Apathy, Brian Arcis, Shalon Wood, Fenris, Pelel, peterson9803, Andrew Joshua Talon, shinji the good sharer, and everyone on my yahoo group. They gave me scenes, ideas, and all sorts of other things. Tell me if I missed you so I can add to this list. Another thanks goes to meteoricshipyards who wrote the majority of the continuing adventures of the tentacle monster as well as several others. Anything I wrote on that sub plot was fairly minor so kudos. And still another goes to neil.reynolds who wrote a large number of scenes. Yet another goes to The Resident who was good enough to do a bit of editing and caught several of my mistakes. Still more go to Andrew Joshua Talon who wrote much (most) of the subplot with Narcissa, Remus, and Draco.

Omake by luinlothana

"Luna?" Hermione finally spoke "Didn't you say something about three of your Great grandfathers? What happened with the fourth one?"

"Hermione, no matter what you might think of my grandmother three was enough. That way she had a week for each of them. It would be highly unhygienic if she had to have a fourth one during those days"

"Uhm, but I thought you said your great grandfathers"

"Oh yeah, they were really great. Grandma often told me about it. And stresses I should settle for nothing less. Quite sensible that. On that note We are just lucky to have Harry, don't you think?"

"I... never mind, Luna"