Christopher drove through the town at a crawling speed so that he could avoid speaking to her for just a little while longer. He knew that he had to do this for Rory. He knew that he had to speak to Lorelai if it was the last thing he ever did for his first daughter. Still he couldn't lie and say that the mere thought of confronting her after the vow renewal didn't make him nervous. He'd been so drunk that some things were still foggy. He could see her house from where he was and sighed. He looked at his clock and questioned whether or not she would be awake. When he pulled his SUV into her driveway he was surprised to see that her jeep wasn't the only vehicle parked in the drive. He knew that this probably meant that Luke was there. For a fleeting second he thought about turning around and going home. He shook his head. No he had to do this for Rory. He had to tell himself that so that he couldn't chicken out. He got out of his SUV and slowly walked up to her front door. When he finally reached the door he rang the bell and waited for her to come down and answer it.
Lorelai was drinking a cup of coffee and reading her horoscope at the kitchen table when the bell rang. She looked at her cup and sighed. It was probably someone with some asinine question about her and Luke's engagement. She thought about just letting them think she was gone, but knew that if it was someone like Miss Patty then they wouldn't give up. She got up from the table and walked to the door not even bothering to check and see who it was. When she opened it she silently cursed herself for not pretending to be gone. "What are you doing here Christopher?"
There was something about her that said that she was trying to be okay even though she really wasn't. He recognized that look from when she told him that she was pregnant. She wanted everybody to think that she was just fine, but she wasn't. Inside she was fighting a battle with her heart. At this point he couldn't tell who was winning. "I need to talk to you."
"If it's about what happened at the vow renewal then don't waste your breath. It's over and done with. I'd rather just not discuss it." She replied in a defeated voice. She knew that he was reading her. Chris was one of the few people who could do that. He'd always been able to do that.
"It's about Rory. She came to talk to me last night. I think we should discuss the situation." Christopher knew that things were going to get out of hand. He could already tell. He knew that tempers were going to flare.
Lorelai shook her head. "I'm not going down that road either."
"So it's true. You're really just going to give up on our daughter because she made a decision you didn't like?" Christopher asked in disbelief.
Lorelai could feel her emotions begin to stir. "First off when did she become our daughter Christopher? Secondly she doesn't need me to help her along. She's an adult now Christopher. It's time for her to be one."
"I realize I wasn't there Lorelai, but before we go into this whole I was an absent father I just want you to remember that I tried to be there. I came home from Princeton one weekend to see you and my daughter and your parents informed me that you had taken off. You didn't leave me a note or even try to tell me about your plans. You left me and you took our daughter with you. I found you. Remember that? I came to that inn you were working at and saw that our daughter was being raised in this town. I knew that there was no point in fighting with you about your living situation. So I left, but before I did so I gave you my number so you could call me in case you needed anything. You didn't let me be there." Christopher had always wanted to tell her this. He always wanted to make this point when people accused him of being a bad father. People always gave Lorelai all the credit for Rory's upbringing but a lot of that had to do with the fact that she wouldn't let him be there.
"Just go back to Hartford Christopher. Things between us are bad enough as it is. Luke will be back soon. I'd rather not have to deal with him seeing you. Rory's making big girl decisions so it's time to treat her like a big girl. She doesn't need my input anymore. So I'm going to let her live her own life." Lorelai turned to back into her house. She didn't want to hear his truthful words. She had pushed him away. Part of her did it because she wanted him to succeed, part of her did it because she wanted Rory all to herself, and part of her did it because she knew if she married him things would come too easy and Lorelai hated easy.
Christopher gently grabbed her arm and turned her around so that she had to face him. "No, I'm not giving up this easily. That's always been my problem I've never been willing to really fight for something. You pushing Rory away because she's taking this time off isn't going to help anybody. It's just going make her more determined to make this work. You need to stop telling her that this is the wrong choice."
Lorelai was no longer weak. Now she was strong, because inside she was dying to do something rash like slap him. How dare he judge the way she was handling things. "When did you become an expert on the many decisions of Rory?"
"Even though you won't admit it Lor you know that Rory and I are alike. You know it. Come on you've never been a bookworm. You always hated school. You hated the thought of going to college." Christopher pointed out.
Lorelai scoffed. "Oh yeah you two sound like two peas in a pod. The only problem is you don't know each other. I don't even know her anymore. My Rory would never have dated a jerk like Logan. She would never steal a yacht. My Rory was sweet, innocent, naïve, and studious. I don't know this girl."
"I can't believe you have the nerve to judge Rory's taste in guys. You of all people should know that first impressions aren't really quite as important as the second or third. I think you hate them together because they remind you too much of us. I mean God Lorelai don't you remember we used to do those things when we were young. We were jetsetters. We were privileged. We were snots. Look at us. We turned out okay. Rory loves him and you hate him. Don't you see that you're acting like your mother?" Christopher couldn't believe that he had actually accused Lorelai of being like Emily Gilmore. He knew that she would not take that statement lightly. Still someone had to tell her.
Lorelai turned a shade of crimson red. "I will never be like Emily Gilmore. Never, do you understand that? My decision to stay out of Rory's life is not one that Emily would make. So if you wouldn't mind I have a busy day today. Please leave."
Christopher turned around and started to walk away. He couldn't believe she was being this pigheaded. He turned around for a brief moment and saw that she was standing there watching him. He could tell that she was shaking slightly. He couldn't tell if it was more from the cold or from the anger that had filled her soul. "Lorelai don't do this! Don't shut her out! She needs you whether you believe so or not. She's never going to be that Rory again if you don't talk to her. Logan and Rory are good together. They're happy. Lorelai I know you hear me even if you want to pretend that you think I'm an arrogant ass." Christopher pulled his keys out of his pocket and got into his SUV. He looked at her one more time before driving away.
Lorelai went inside her small house and took a deep breath. She wasn't ready to accept what he was saying. In a month or two she'd be ready, but for now she couldn't do it. She couldn't accept the fact that Rory was growing up and making her own decisions. At least this would be a chance for Rory to know Chris. She took a sip of her now cold coffee and thought about her upcoming wedding. This was supposed to be one of the happiest times of her life and all she could feel was sadness.
Okay that was the update. The next chapter will be a little less sad. I hope that you liked it. I was really happy to see that some people have reviewed. I thought I was the only Balcony Buddy. Thanks for reading.