DVD Malfunctions
By Capt. Blue-Eyed Jane
Disclaimer: I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean! X'(
Chapter 15: The Curse Lifted
Back on the Deck of The Dauntless- Norrington fights with venom, sword flashing, a thrust finds its mark, and he pulls it back. Koehler is surprised, he registers the pain and realizes he is flesh, and falls to the deck with a 'thud.' Twigg, who has been fighting nearby, seen Koehler fall and looks in surprise at Norrington. He then looks up at the full moon and realizes what has happened. Norrington puts his sword to Twigg's throat. Twigg drops his weapon. One by one the other pirates drop their weapons also.
The desk is no longer rattling. Swann puts a hand on the pull, hesitates then pulls the drawer open. His expression tells us everything we need to know about the state of the drawer's contents.
Bo'sun, who is holding Gillette up above his head, spins around as a large number of Bayonets are pointed at him. Ragetti still chasing his eyeball manages to grab it and put it back in. He looks at Pintel who is standing with his handsin the air and then turns and looks down the barrel of a gun. The weapons are held by Murtogg and Mullroy.
"Parlay?"
"The ship is ours gentlemen." Norrington says calmly looking at them all. The soldiers and sailors all cheer. Swann peeks out of the cabin window and sees the battle is over, coming out of the cabin he joins the cheers, congratulating marines. And pretending to 'rumble' with the now alive-undead pirates as if he was contributing in the fight instead of hiding in the bedroom like the little wuss he is. Elizabeth cheers and jump at Norrington who drops his weapon just in time and catches her swinging her around, he puts her down gently and for the first time they look at each other; like really look at each other. In no more then a second James scoops her up and presses his lips against hers overpoweringly in a hot kiss.
"Elizabeth…"
Jack stands away from the moonlight. He draws his knife, cuts his arm, and then wipes the blood from the blade onto the coin. Will, at the chest, has lifted the lid up, half covering the chest, coins still showing. They crowded around the chest. Jack arrives, now a skeleton, and holds the bloodied coin over the chest but does not let go. A beat; he is aware of Will watching him. Sam steals his line:
"The Immortal Captain Jack Sparrow: It has a ring to it" jack nodded smiling, but Will gave him a disapproving look.
"Jack…" Jack sighs 'oh, well,' and releases the coin. Thebloody coin lands in the chest. Jack's arm is back to normal.
"Look at it this way." Hayley said. "You may not be immortal, but if you were immortal you'd regret it after a night with me," Will's Eyebrows shot to the sky as Sam and Janine shout:
"OOOOOOOOooooo" Hayley pulls on the braids on Jack's chin and kisses him passionately; turning away Will starts to push the lid closed. With surprising force and speed, the lid moves on its own and shuts. Then they turn to the entrance of the cave and see Lieutenant Marks and sees Janine, standing past the water, watching. Their eyes meet. Smiling he scrambles towards her and she calmly (almost smug) moves on stepping stones across the water, they meet and embrace now is the time for the kiss ... They gaze at each other ... Then there's a CRASH; the sound of Jack and Hayley gathering up pieces of treasure, including large gold object d'art.
Janine and Marks look at each other. The moment is broken. Back to the real world. Janine averts her gaze.
"You should return to the Dauntless. Your duty pursues you. And me." She then looks back at Sam and Will, their heads close laughing in a conversation only for their ears she begins to leave the cave when Marks' hand grabs hers.
"My heart pursues you as well, Jane…Janine." She stopped dead in her tracks, every nerve was set on fire and her heart beat wildly in her ears but she ignored it and turned to and looked at him sadly.
"I'm not ready to give my heart to you Marks…Daniel. The last person I gave it to…it didn't work. I can't promise anything to you-" Before she could say another word his lips cut her off and he kissed her as if every second was a last one. His hand trailed up her back, the other nestled in her hair and kept her from pulling away, his tongue exploring every inch of her mouth but slid against her tongue like silk. She's so sweet he thought, Vanilla and Chai.
"Hey love birds." They pulled apart; apparently everyone's cutesy moments were over, including theirs.
"Let's go the Pearl won't wait all night for their captain."
"Yes I would be much obliged if you could return me to my ship." Janine looked down at her feet
"Yeah about that…"
Problem: The Black Pearl is not there. Jack stands, scanning the area. No good; it's gone. Jack sits back down. In the rowboat: Janine and Sam sit at the bow, facing forward; Will and Daniel at the oars, facing backwards; Jack in the stern, facing Will. Jack has a large sack filled with treasure the he refused to leave the island without. Janine opened her mouth to apologize but it was overcome by the rumble of the earth and sky. Winds howled and swirled around the tiny boat as the Isla de Muerta sank into the crushing depths of the sea. When everything died back down Janine looked at him.
"I'm sorry Jack ..." Beyond them, the Dauntless looms in the distance. Jack sighed in defeat.
"They did what's right by them. Can't expect more than that." Will snaps him a look, then looks away, scowling as he decides: Goddammit, you can expect more than that.
A hangman's noose and the sound of a snare drums ride on the winds that morning, Sam and Elizabeth stand at the back of the crowd. Inside the fortress down a couple of steps, Janine and Hayley look gloomily out of the bars. They hear the sound of Drums and look at each other.
"We need to get out of here!"
"I know that but how is the question!" Hayley said looking around. The guard had his feet up on the table, his hat was over his eyes and the snoring could be hear d for miles. The rings of keys were just dangling off the desk. Janine untied the waist scarf and pulled Hayley's hoop earring out of the hole. From inside her pocket she pulled out two beads from the Fortune of Isla De Muerta. Two gold beads with hole the size of a dime and weighed as much as a quarter. She slipped them onto the scarf then tided the scarf onto the hoop earring and then held it out to Hayley. She gave her a weird look.
"Me?"
"You! You have better aim then I do remember? The last time I fired a gun it nearly crushed you."
"Right" Hayley grabbed the scarf and hurled it towards the desk; the keys were hit and fell off with the hoop earring just inches away. Surprisingly the noise didn't wake up the guard. Then they threw it again, but it landed past the ring. But they didn't give up and continued to try and hook the ring and drag it closer…
On the gallows, Jack stands wrists bound and face etched with boredom. An executioner checks the mechanism of the trap door with a sandbag. An official drones on and on recounting a list of Jack's crimes.
"Jack Sparrow, be it known that you have..."
"Captain, Captain, Jack Sparrow…"
"...for your willful commission of crimes against the crown. Said crimes being numerous in quantity and sinister in nature, the most egregious of these to be cited herewith - piracy, smuggling..."
Elizabeth and Sam watch as they go to the second sheet of paper containing Jack's crimes.
"This is wrong." Elizabeth whispers, Norrington doesn't respond. Swann speaks for him:
"Commodore Norrington is bound by the law. As are we all."
"...impersonating an officer of the Spanish Royal Navy, impersonating a cleric of the Church of England..." Jack smiles 'ah yes' then looks over at the Executioner who glares at him, he turns back to the crowed. Marks looks over to the door that leads to the prison, Norrington sees this and says.
"You also, Marks, are bond by the law." Sam looks over at Marks who looks worried, for what reason she doesn't know. But she notices a Red Coat standing guard by the door, she looks at Marks, he seems to have noticed it too. Marks bows to the Commodore.
"Please excuse me I must use the lavetry." He turns and walks in the opposite direction and once he gets through the door he runs down the stretch of hallways, turns and runs through another stretch when he screeches to a stop. There on a couple of wooden crates were two handcuffs, then he looks out of the arch towards the gallows and gets an idea. Marks goes into the crowed who automatically moves for him and creates a clear path to the Official who is still reading the list of crimes
"...sailing under false colors, arson, kidnapping, looting…" Marks looks up at him and he stops and turns to Marks. Jack looks over too, but a grunt comes from the executioner and he looks back ahead but hears every word.
"The two prisoners that I'm bringing up are to be hung with Sparrow for association, I'm bringing them up."
"But do we hang-?"
"Them together? Yes. Commodore's orders." Then he thought of something else. "Just don't announce it until you're done reading all of Sparrow's crimes." The official nods and continues with Sparrow's crimes. Jack smirked on the stand and thought 'what vexes all men…' Marks reaches the door around the corner and kicks it open-
"FINALLY!" Hayley shouts, Janine hushes her, but it's too late the guards was awake and stepped on the keys.
"At least gimme back my waist scarf" Janine bargained, but to no avail. Then the door burst open and Marks turns to the Guard and gives a nice right hook. The guard falls to the floor unconscious. In his hand were two handcuffs.
"We need to save jack,"
"Obviously." Hayley said, marks placed the cuffs on Hayley's hands, they clicked into place, but he didn't lock them. He turned to Janine and did the same.
"You're going to get in trouble." She whispered, Marks looked at her and kissed her sweetly.
"Frankly my love, I don't give a damn!"
"...poaching, brigandage, pilfering, depravity, depredation, and general lawlessness."
Sam is getting impatient. Then he spots: Cottons' parrot. It lands on a flag pole held by Murtogg. Murtogg surreptitiously tries to dislodge the bird.
"To be hung with you by association, Miss Janine Rome. Also known as the new-and short-terror of the Caribbean seas; Blue-Eyed Jane her accomplice and Sparrow's Lover: Hayley Jones." Marks brought them up to the stand where two other nooses were looped over the wooden beam. The executioner unraveled them and then placed their heads in the loop.
"For these crimes you have been sentenced to be, on this day, hung by the neck until dead. May God have mercy on your souls." Sam looks over at Will like: DO SOMETHING! That's the signal. Will heads into the crowd. But before he can take a step Janine shouts:
"WAIT!" The commodore raises a hand to the executioner, then looks at Janine.
"What are your final words?"
"Sir, Commodore. Please release me for I plead my Belly." Jack and Hayley look at her shocked.
"What?!"
"And who is the father of your unborn child?" The Commodore asks, Janine glances worriedly over at Marks, who nods at her to continue.
"Lieutenant Daniel Jackson Marks, of The Royal Navy" Whispers go around the crowd, Norrington looks over at Marks who smiles meekly and goes to interrogate him and Hayley looks over to her and notices that she's slowly taking off her chains then-in a flash-while everyone's distracted she took out her sword and started to battle the Exicutioner, Will and Sam dash off through the crowd Elizabeth spots Cotton's Parrot. She puts it together. Will throws open his cloak, puts a hand on his sword hilt and shouts
"MOVE!" The crowd scatters a path. Sam straitens her sleeve and two short swords shoot out, Norrington moves past Elizabeth, staring at Will,
"Marines!" Elizabeth suddenly staggers away from Norrington and Swann,
"I can't breathe!" and faints. Swann and Norrington react to her plight.
"Elizabeth!" The commotion has distracted the crowd: Will has a direct line of sight to the gallows.
The Executioner grips the release lever --
The drum roll ends and quickly Will draws and throws his sword. Sam told the blade by the tip and flings them. The executioner pulls the lever. The trap doors open and Jack and Hayley drop Will's sword and Sam's blade embed in the doors. Jack tries to balance on it whereas Hayley stands one foot an each blade.
Swann fans Elizabeth. She sits up suddenly she was faking. Her father looks shocked for a moment and says
"are you...you were…" and gives a face or relief mixed with disapproval. Jack still balances, the sword bending, noose tightening. The Executioner slashes an axe at Janine who dodges it and looks down at Sam who bends over and takes out the small axe attached to her leg and throws it at Janine who misses catching it and inadvertently cuts Jack's rope.
Jack drops to the ground below the gallows.
Janine knocks the Executioner off the gallows platform. The Executioner falls into the crowd on top of Norrington and his men. Will quickly dashes up the steps and cuts Hayley free.
Janine and Hayley race between people, guards and pillars, then take the hallway all the way around the fort until they come to a line of Marines.
Nodding to each other they take the barrels on either side of the hallway and roll it towards theguards. Some try to jump and some land on their face but the ones that Jump over it charge at them with bayonets.
Jack stands and slits the rope that binds his hands on the sword that is sticking in the trap door.
Jack races from under the gallows as Will leaps down.
Jack pulls off the noose, tosses one end of the rope to Will. They trip some Marines coming down the steps as they run up.
Evading the blade they took the end of the gun and brought it up knocking the jaw of the marine who let go almost immediately. With their new weapons they fight their way up a tiny bit of steps, Hayley and Janine go right, Marines go left-
Will and Jack go left. Marines, led by Gillette, cut them off. They whirl right smashing into Janine and Hayley they look around them- more Marines.
Rifles are brought to bear. They are cornered. Janine looks over to the edge othe platrom and notices and overly large British flag billowing in the soft wind, but she hears footsteps and adverts her gaze elsewhere.
Norrington strides up, followed by Swann and Elizabeth. Norrington holds his sword on Will and Jack.
"I expected some manner of escape attempt." Then looks over to Will. "But not by you."
"On our Return to Port Royal I granted you clemency, and this is how you thank me? By throwing in with him? He is a pirate!" Governor Swann said striding up beside Norrington.
"And a good man." Will throws his sword aside, Jack points to himself proudly and mouths 'that's me' "If all I have achieved here is that the hangman will earn two pairs of boots instead of one ... So be it. At least my conscience will be clear." Norrington puts his sword closer to Will's throat.
"You forget your place, Turner." Will pointedly glances down, back up; a small smile: "It's right here between you and Jack…Mate." Sam steps beside him.
"As is mine." She links her hand in Will's. Norrington takes this in, realizing the deeper truth behind her actions. Marks then comes from behind Norrington and stands beside Janine.
"And mine." Janine nodds Happily.
"I aint moving, I'm with my friends" Hayley then stands closer to Jack.
"My lover." Elizabeth looks at James and says:
"Jack is a good man." She moves from the side of James and stands beside Janine and Marks.
"Elizabeth.."
"James. This is wrong." They all look at the group of people and they don't seem to be moving anytime soon, finally Swann's had enough
"Lower your weapons. For goodness' sake put them down" Norrington's glances from Elizabeth to Marks, nods almost imperceptibly. Gillette gestures for the marines to lower their rifles. They do.
"very well." Jack spots Cotton's Parrot. He smiles. And pushes through his little group of defenders
"I'm feeling rather good about this. I think we've arrived in a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically ..." he turned to Norrington. "I want you to know that I was rooting for you, mate." He goes to leave as Janine and Lieutenant Marks embrace he stops and looks at her.
"Janine, darling, it never would have worked between us. I'm sorry. " Janine smirks.
"jus' keep tellin' yerself that mate," Jack looks at Will
"Will ... nice hat!" He throws up his hands ('What's there to say?') and springs up the steps to the wall.
"Gentlemen! This is the day you will always remember as the day you almost hung Captain Jack-" He slips, losing his balance and flips over the wall and is gone. Jack plunges, turning his fall into a passable dive and hits the water. Everyone rushes to look over the wall. Jack surfaces, does a quick mental check of his exit.
"Still memorable." Lieutenant Marks shakes his head
"Idiot. He's still nowhere to go but back to the noose." Janine smiles coyloy as if she knows something he doesn't,
" I wouldn't be too sure about that." She points to the bay and from the docks below someone cries:
"Look! A ship! The Black Pearl! It's the Black Pearl!" Janine looks up at Lieutenant Marks and gives him a chaste-but passionate kiss. Then brings her fingers to her lips and blows a high whistle.
"Sorry luv, still a pirate remember, I've got two more weeks 'till me dear ol' dad comes, why not spend it with my calling?" Marks smiles
" I'll still be on your tail."
"Wouldn't 'ave it any other way mate." She turned to Will and grabbed Sam from his side.
"Sorry have to take her wit' me. Ciao." With a snap of her fingers a large cloud of smoke covers the deck and the officers start coughing she then pulled Sam onto the ledge and told her to hold on, Janine yanked the overly large flag off its post and parasailed it off the cliff, Sam screaming all the way towards "the water" then Janine shouted:
"HOIST THE MAIN SAILS!" Sails unfurled from out of the blue and The Illusionist appeared, the deck only feet below them now and they landed in the utmost graceful tumble. Janine stood up quickly at the wheel and spun the ship towards the Horizon.
"we trail the Pearl!" she shouted, and the crew cheered going about their duties. Janine and Sam stood side-by-side and watched as The Black Pearl, sails full, soaked up its long overdue beauty shot.
Jack smiles at the sight.
Norrington watches the scene below, sword at parade rest on his shoulder. Lieutenant Marks steps up beside him watching as Jack swims for the Pearl and Janine stand at the wheel of her ship.
"What's your plan of action, sir?" Norrington does not respond, dealing with all the ramifications of the last few minutes. Swann recognizes his dilemma.
"Perhaps it is possible that on the rare occasion when pursuing the right course demands an act of piracy, piracy can be the right course?" Norrington looks at him. He nods - and then turns from the wall, to Will.
"Mister Turner." Will joins Norrington, who still holds the sword. A private moment between the two men.
"This is a very nice sword. I expect the man who made it to show the same care and devotion in all aspects of his life. My compliments." Will is surprised; then nods to Norrington: they understand each other.
"Thank you." Norrington turns away, toward the Fort. Lieutenant Marks calls to him.
"Commodore? What about Sparra'? Shall we prepare the Dauntless for pursuit?"
"Oh, I think we can afford him one day's head start." Lieutenant Marks watches him go, and then stride ups up beside him walking back down to the Gallows, Elizabeth follows behind her Husband to be.
Cotton, high atop the aft mast, throws a line In the water, Jack catches the line as it sweeps by, and climbs as Cotton reel it in. Jack is lifted up and around the fantail of the Black Pearl and onto the deck. He pauses, looks around him, taking it all in.
Hayley (who snuck away when everyone was talking) holds out Jack's coat, welcoming him aboard. Jack shoulders into it, takes his hat from Cotton, smiling and nodding. Cotton's parrot lands on Cotton's shoulder. Jack nears Gibbs who actually salutes to him. Jack pauses.
"Thought you were supposed to keep to the code."
"We figured they're more actually guidelines." Jack smiles. He continues up the steps to the stern deck, where AnaMaria stands at the wheel. She steps away.
"Captain Sparrow ... the Black Pearl is yours." Jack runs a hand lovingly along the rail, then takes the wheel. It feels good, right, in his hands. Hayley stands beside him and he wraps an arm around her-this too felt, right. He opens the compass, takes a reading, and adjusts the course. He notes that everyone was still watching him.
"on deck you scabberous dogs Man the braces! Let down and haul to run free. Now...bring me that horizon." Hayley pulls out a bottle of Rum and uncorks it humming the tune for Pirates life for me. She turns to the starboard side where The Illusionist trailed lazily but gracefully behind and raised the bottle to Janine and Sam who waved back. They all look out to the horizon. Jack Smiles:
"Now...Bring me that horizon..." he hums a bit "And really bad eggs…" Hayley looks over at Janine and Sam who look back at her. "Drink up me hearties, yo ho…!"
The Black Pearl and The Illusionist sailaway, into the sun.
THE END
Well almost, we still have the Epilogue. There's gonna be another big twist. You guys will never guess it. It's totally poposterous, but I thought it'd be funny.
Amazingly to most of you I will have the First Chapter of the Sequel up this evening, look for the title PC Malfunctions if you want to read it.
Ciao, caio
Capt. Blue-Eyed Jane