See all warnings and disclaimers in the first chapter.
A/N: I love you, I love you, I seriously, seriously love you! All of you! Thank you so much for your loving support, encouragement, and inspiration! I've decided I will write a sequel to this story rather than continue on with this one. In thanks, I will keep my promise of earlier. Email me with requests for the new one, and I will do my best to fulfill them all. Thank you again, not just to my reviewers but to all my loyal readers. I love you to death!
The World We Cannot See, the World We'd Forgotten
Heero woke early, his entire body thrumming. He simply couldn't sleep anymore, even though it wasn't even dawn. Shifting off his Bonded, he placed a light kiss to Duo's neck and rose. More silent than a shadow he drifted through the halls, stealing down the stairs of Quatre's manor to the back door. He pulled it open and phased into his primary form. Then he bolted into the cold dark of predawn.
The ground was damp, and the air smelled of rain though the sky was clear. It must have rained a lot last night. It would be a beautiful day. That thought made his heart soar. Today, the bandages would come off Duo's eyes. According to Doctor Noin, his eyes had healed better than expected. They were probably as good as new, although the real test would be in the months ahead to see if Duo's eyesight deteriorated.
Heero was determined not to let that happen. He wasn't sure if he could stop it, but he would do his damndest.
There was little to hunt at this hour. So Heero just ran, ran on and on, his gait eating the ground. The breeze ruffled through his thick fur as he sped over the ground like the wind itself, singing its song in his ears. He quickly had to blank his mind, because running only fueled his energy. And he had many hours to go before Duo could remove those bandages!
It was easy to lose himself in the joy of running. So he did so. He thought of nothing as his feet carried him—at least, he didn't think of later today. Instead he thought of the time he'd already spent with Duo. The mornings he'd woken Duo with loving caresses, the skin-to-skin heat, the panting gasps. He loved everything Duo gave, greedily taking it all. He was a little surprised by his own resilience, because he wanted Duo more every day. Wanted to claim his sweet, sweet Bonded as his own. Irrevocably. Irreversibly. His own.
When the sun broke over the horizon in glorious splendor it almost startled Heero. Had he really gotten so lost in his own mind? Pink, orange, and purple splashed the dawn sky, and Heero panted laughter. By this time tomorrow, Duo would be able to watch this with him. He would rediscover colors, shapes, sizes.
And I will share in them all with you, my love. I will be by your side every step of the way!
And still he ran, not really paying attention to his surroundings, passing game by in favor of running. Finally, eventually, a stirring in the back of his mind told him his beloved had awakened. A drifting, questing thought brushed his mind, vaguely curious as to where Heero was. He sent back a wordless pulse of love and reassurance, veering his course to return to where Duo waited.
He didn't want Duo to wait anymore.
o8o o8o
Duo's heart started to pound when Quatre's clock chimed six in the evening. The pain in his head and behind his blind eyes had days ago faded and vanished completely, replaced by a vaguely itchy feeling. His doctor told him that was a good sign.
"It means your eyes are healing right," she'd assured him.
She'd requested that it be at least dusk when the bandages came off. Bright light would probably do more harm than good to his newly-healed eyes, and she'd also told Duo's father and Quatre that he shouldn't be outside in direct sunlight—or any sunlight at all—for at least four days. His optic nerves needed to readjust to the processing of light.
He was insanely nervous. He was so afraid the bandages would come off to reveal . . . nothing. What if it didn't work? What if the treatments had failed? Or what if he got his sight back for awhile only to lose it again? He didn't think he could deal with it as well a second time as he had the first.
"It'll be all right, love," Heero soothed abruptly. "And it's time. The sun is nearly set."
"Are you ready, Duo?" Quatre's voice asked softly.
The speed of his heartbeat doubled. "Yes," he managed, feeling like he was choking.
A warm hand on his gently pulled him up. "Then I'll let Heero take you upstairs. I'm sure he wants to be the first thing you see."
Judging by the strain of emotions running through Heero's subconscious mind, that was perfectly true. Duo rested his hand on Heero's neck as the wolf paced up the stairs to their room. Heero immediately phased into his human form, pulling Duo against him and placing a light—yet warm—kiss on his lips.
"I'll take them off," he breathed against Duo's mouth. "Let me do it, all right?"
Duo just nodded, not trusting himself to speak. Trusting himself to Heero because he was too scared to do it himself. His Bonded guided him to the bed, pushing him down on its soft, familiar surface. Heero didn't just remove the bandages. In fact, he didn't touch them at all, forgoing the moment of truth for now, slowly removing Duo's clothes.
To Duo's surprise, Heero's thoughts followed the line of relaxing Duo until he was calmer again, removing the bandages when the fear was gone. Heero's mouth descended on him again, and he wound his arms around Heero's neck to hold him closer as he returned the kiss.
"I love you, Duo," Heero whispered into his mind. "I want the first thing you see to be the love in my eyes when I'm looking at you."
Somehow, Heero was naked too. The feel of his warm—hot, almost—skin, pressed tight against his, heightened every sensation. Every nerve-ending seemed hypersensitive, poised to receive every touch and caress Heero gave. Heero worshipped his skin, the kiss never breaking, his tongue exploring every corner of Duo's mouth.
Time ticked by meaninglessly, a forgotten entity by the time Heero had Duo completely relaxed. Perspiration slicked their skin as Heero aligned their bodies, sliding along each other with a kind of erotic ease. For some reason he was very aware of little things. The feel of Heero's thigh between his own. The heat of every breath Heero took washing over his skin below his ear. Heero's fingertips digging into his hip and lower back. The feel of the silken sheets against his shoulders.
"Duo," Heero murmured aloud this time, "are you ready?"
The jumble of his thoughts made it hard for Duo to determine exactly what he meant. "For what?" he whispered, not sure Heero was talking about the bandages still over his eyes.
And, apparently, he wasn't. "The next step," came the heated answer, and Duo understood what he meant.
He felt the flush rising in his skin. Heero was ready to take them into unexplored territory. To move onto things they'd yet not done with each other. To consummate their relationship, the final step, and to claim Duo. Irrevocably as his. And to give himself to Duo. Completely. To make them one.
"Yes," he breathed.
Heero's weight shifted, pressing to the center of Duo's thighs, encouraging them to spread to make room for him. A warm hand centered on him, heavy and caressing. Heero's other hand trailed up his inner thigh, barely light enough to tease. His skin flinched in response, a shiver trekking up his spine as those fingers brushed higher, the pressure growing bolder as it neared its ultimate destination.
Duo couldn't help squirming when two fingers circled his entrance, the place Heero would seek to join their physical bodies the way their minds and hearts had already joined. His skin felt hot and tight, but at this new sensation—never before experienced—heat flashed through him all over again. It was strange. It was intensely erotic.
"This might feel a little . . . weird . . ." Heero murmured.
One slick finger pushed inside him. He didn't know where Heero had gotten lubrication, nor what he'd used. The cold was a sharp counterpoint to the heat burning in his core, and the heat emanating from Heero's fingers. And it did feel weird. He'd never felt anything like it. But it didn't hurt, and it would bring him one step closer to being ready.
For a moment Heero held his finger still, letting Duo get used to the sensation of invasion. Then he began a gentle in-and-out motion, too slow to be a thrust. It was soothing, somehow, and . . .
He bit his lower lip, smiling a little. "That feels pretty weird," he admitted.
"Does it hurt?" Heero asked softly, pressing light kisses to Duo's cheeks and forehead.
"No," Duo assured him. "Just . . . strange."
It was some time before Heero added a second. Duo knew it was because his Bonded didn't want to hurt him, and he was grateful. These sensations were completely new, and it was taking some getting used to. This pace gave him time to adjust. And relax, because even one finger felt a little tight. It barely felt like there was room for two.
"It'll get easier," Heero whispered in response to that not-thought.
Duo just nodded. Heero's fingers delved slowly deeper, still sliding in and out, making a gentle scissoring motion. He pressed ever deeper until, with a gentle twist of his wrist, he found something that made Duo's back arch in a shock of pleasure, sensation crackling over his nerves. He fell back to the bed, body trembling with aftershocks.
"What . . . what was that?" he gasped.
Heero's response was a soft, warm chuckle in his ear. "I've never felt that before either, but Trowa explained some things to me. Normally my father and eldest sister would be the ones to talk to me about these things, but obviously I couldn't leave you even for a few days. So Trowa did."
That struck Duo as mildly funny. It might have been funnier if their positions weren't so . . . intimate . . . "You talk about these things? At your age?"
Heero licked his ear. "Don't make fun, lover mine. Only for Bonded pairs like us. I would die before hurting you, especially during intercourse."
"Oh," Duo said, head canting to the side as Heero's wandering mouth trekked down his neck. "I guess . . . that makes . . . nnnh . . . that feels good, Heero . . ."
A chuckle that reverberated across his skin greeted him again. Those fingers so deep didn't stroke across that spot inside him, but rather provided constant stimulation in the form of surging pressure. Heero's mouth on his neck sucked and nipped, lips and tongue working together in perfect harmony. He'd never known before his neck could be so . . . sensitive.
o8o o8o
Heero worked his fingers inside his lover, making sure the resistance around the first two was minimal before sliding in another. It was such a tight fit. Trowa had told him his first time with Quatre had been tight, with the Telmaran panther taking his time and using extreme caution.
"It would be very easy to tear that fragile skin," Trowa had told the wolf. "You could really hurt him, Heero. Hell, you could even kill him if you were rough. It's different between two males, because females are built for this kind of intercourse. Males, not so much. You'll be fine, just make sure to take your time and prepare him."
The muscles clenching around his fingers were no longer squeezing so hard, giving him more room to move them freely. Not much, of course, but more than before. His other hand mapped the surface of his beloved's skin, gliding over beads of gleaming perspiration on that pale, perfect expanse. Occasionally he passed over the burning flesh between Duo's thighs, but for the most part he avoided it. He didn't want Duo to come until he and his lover were joined. Finally.
Which teased him as much as Duo. His own need was . . . amazing. But he would not rush. He didn't want to make his beloved bleed. "You are so beautiful," he whispered. "There's nothing as perfect as you."
"Heero . . ." Duo murmured, his head tilting toward the sound of his lover's voice, lips parting.
There was no mistaking that request, and even if there were, Heero could hear it fine in Duo's mind. He didn't need a second invitation to kiss his lover. He delved into the sweet ambrosia of Duo's mouth as he added a fourth and final finger to that incredibly tight velvet heat he was burning to enter.
Finally, finally he felt Duo was ready. That quivering tightness was clenching around his fingers for an entirely different reason now, and Duo was aching for the final step. Judging by the subtle squirm in his hips he was ready for Heero to continue. So he slid his fingers free, wringing a low moan from his lover, and broke the kiss.
"Duo," he whispered, "are you ready?"
A flash of nervousness passed through Duo, but it was gone quickly. "Yes."
Heero's own heart quickened a little as he reached up and carefully hooked the bandages. "Close your eyes," he murmured.
"Okay," Duo agreed.
The bandages were removed, and Heero tossed them aside. Cupping that beautiful face in both hands, he lightly kissed the parted lips. "All right," he breathed. "Open your eyes, love."
Slowly, so slowly those long jet lashes lifted. Heero's heart did an odd flip in his chest. Those eyes, once so pale as to be nearly colorless, were a deep indigo-violet. For several moments his breath caught in his throat. The pupils were clearly visible, and even though there was slight bruising around the bottom of his eyes, they were beautiful. Pools of endless dark in which Heero could drown.
And they were looking right into his own.
o8o o8o
"Heero . . ." Duo gasped, his heart beating erratically in his chest.
He could see him. He could see Heero's face. Clearly. For the first time, he could actually see his lover. The dark, almost black hair. Messy and unkempt, roguishly attractive. The golden-hued skin, which looked quite striking against Duo's own ivory pale. The firm mouth, the slender-yet-strong proportions. Those eyes.
Eyes the color of cobalt. Memory supplied the word, though Duo had long forgotten the color itself. They were bluer than blue, deep and endless, gleaming windows into Heero's soul. Radiating from those eyes was a love as endless as cobalt itself, enduring and abiding, and all for Duo.
He could see it. He could see the love. Just as clearly as he could see everything around Heero, and even though distance blurred things around the edges it didn't matter. He could see Heero. He could see.
"God, Heero . . ." He couldn't finish. He couldn't speak at all. He could feel the tears start to well, and he hated them because they blurred the beautiful, perfect, loving lines of his Bonded's face.
"You can see me," Heero whispered. "You can see me, can't you?"
Duo just nodded. It was all he could do.
Heero's lips curved up into a beautiful smile. "I can hear your thoughts, love of mine. I'm flattered that you think I'm perfect. I guess that makes us perfect for each other, because you're perfect, too."
Unable to help himself, Duo flung his arms around Heero's neck and dragged him as close as physically possible. He couldn't stop the tears, but at least he wasn't weeping uncontrollably. "Enter me, Heero," he whispered. "I want to feel you inside me. I want to be one with you. Now. Please."
Heero didn't need a second bidding. Bringing their lips into a kiss, he slid inside Duo with a sudden ease. Duo felt his body open for Heero every inch of the way, coveting the invasion as though welcoming him home. Nothing had felt more perfect, or more right.
Their bodies moved together in perfect rhythm. Though this wasn't something either had done before, they moved together with easy grace. Duo raised his pelvis, wrapping his legs around Heero's waist to drive his lover deeper, wanting to feel every inch of him, wanting to be as close as possible.
His world was awash with pleasure. An ecstasy of sensation and bliss. It made him want to close his eyes, to savor it. But he didn't. He refused. His eyes never left Heero's as the pair climbed toward completion together. Heero's eyes bathed him in love every moment, and that rather than the incredible bliss was what eventually sent Duo spiraling down into achingly sweet release.
They clung to each other, riding waves of sensation, both trembling wildly and panting, the silence in the room only punctuating the intimacy, the passion. Glittering aftershocks crackled over Duo's nerves, then a golden glow seemed to settle over him. Heero rolled to his side, their legs tangled as he lay on his side to face Duo.
"I love you," he whispered.
Duo smiled, feeling a pleasant drowsiness steal over him. "I love you, too, Heero."
When Heero smiled in return, he reveled in being able to see it. Even if his sight did deteriorate and vanish again, he would never regret being able to see that smile at least once.