IMr. Ratburn Has Tourettes
By NocturneD
Note: Ready for another chapter while trying to cool off?
Caution: extreme language
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Chapter 6: PISS SH!T
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Mr. Ratburn was about to leave Mr. Haney's office until suddenly there was a knock at the door and since Mr. Ratburn was already up he decided to get it. He opened the door to find a tall well built rabbit man in a normal black business suit with short middle parted black hair and blue eyes.
Mr. Haney coughed, "Can I help you?"
The man spoke, "Uh yeah, I'm Mr. Grange the substitute. We talked over the phone as I wanted to tell you that I was coming in late."
Mr. Haney scratched his head, "That's strange. I thought the man that went into Mr. Ratburn's classroom was... Mr... Grange..." The principal froze and muttered, "If... you're Grange... then... who the..."
It didn't take two seconds for Mr. Ratburn to figure out, "HOLY SHIT!"
The three men raced to the classroom to find the room completely dark except for a single light shining over the desk as Binky, Buster, and Francine were dressed in leather and holding weird erotic objects. Binky was bent over the wooden desk with everyone's knowledge that he's wearing the assless chaps, Francine was holding up a dashboard lighter and then suddenly presses it against Binky's ass as the large boy yelped and gripped the end of the table. The three older men were shocked by this as Mr. Ratburn interrupted, "WHAT THE FUCK?"
Suddenly the real Mr. Grange pointed to the supposed substitute sitting in the back manipulating himself, "Hey wait... I remember you! You're that guy from NAMBLA!"
"Uh..." The fake substitute tried to zip up his pants until he decided to run for it as he grabbed the gray bunny boy and the yellow bunny girl in the stripped shirt and jumped through the windows.
"Where those two important?" The real Mr. Grange asked.
"No..." The class replied back.
"Who were those two anyway?" Sue Ellen asked.
"Is everyone alright?" Mr. Haney asked.
"Yeah..." The class replied.
"My butt burns..." Binky moaned.
And so after that, peace was once again restored to the classroom.
"Well children, as you all know that this is Mr. Ratburn's last day so let's all give him a really big cheer and a fond farewell." Mr. Grange instructed. And that's what the children gave him, a very fond farewell until Mr. Ratburn told them to go suck an elephants' dick and go shit at the ice cream store for some reason.
"Good bye Mr. Ratburn! We'll miss you!" Buster waved.
"FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU ALL THE ASS!!!" Ratburn shouted as he drove out of the school parking lot. Mr Grange took the students back into the building to start the lesson plan as he decided to take it easy today since it was his first day. The days turned to weeks, then weeks turned into months... Then suddenly, the family of the students of Mr. Ratburn's class received a letter that Nigel Ratburn has died in a car accident while trying to swear at an old woman for driving too slow. As well as flipping a school bus full of kids the finger... The funeral was sad as everyone showed up and cried remembering all the good times. Each student had a chance to say something about their former teacher...
"I remember Mr. Ratburn gave me a lot of detentions for thinking I'm mooning him when it was really my face..." Binky sniffed, "He was the sweetest person ever... and... he... called me an ass faced bitch!!!" Binky cried, "OH MR. RATBURN WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO!!!"
At the end of the funeral, Mr. Ratburn was buried face down because that was his request. Reason why, he said that the whole world could kiss his ass...
The minutes flew by as more and more people left Mr. Ratburn's fresh grave, the only ones left where his former students as they were all dressed in black. Except for Muffy who wore red... Arthur wiped away his tears as he pulled out the class photo they took while at the trip to the Wet Willy Water park as Mr. Ratburn posed with the children around him. All of them smiling.
"We'll never forget you Mr. Ratburn." Arthur sniffed.
"Somewhere up there... or down there he's smiling." Buster sighed.
To be continued...
Note: I know, sad that I'm ending this early because I got to get back to the Naruto section sometime.