My spellcheck was flagging some weird errors until I realized it was reading "Will" as a verb instead of a noun. Silly Microsoft Word. And as for longer chapters? I'm trying, honestly, but this is still going to be fairly short and sweet. I'm aiming for a spot that's long enough to be substantial and short enough to be fast-n-fluffy.

I love you guys. This story has gotten amazing positive reception and readership. Just, wow. Thank you so much! I'm sorry, but this is probably the last post until I get back in August. I tied up my little mini-plot, so I can launch right into more fun stuff when I get back.

I don't own Pirates of the Caribbean or the official characters. This is called wishful thinking from which I make no profit. But, er, please don't steal my words or Sparry. She'll probably scratch your eyes out and think it's funny.

…And Really Bad Eggs…

Adventure Six: Sparry Tate Gives Nothing Back

"I thought I'd find you here," said Will. Sparry looked up from her counting.

"Oh?" she asked, pulling the coins towards her.

Will sat down. "Well, obviously if you aren't anywhere you usually are you're probably in your mum's pub."

"You're assuming things," said Sparry, who had a fair idea what this was about and would like to have put the approaching discussion off for say… forever. "There are lots of places I could have been."

"But you weren't there, were you?"

"No, apparently not, since you found me here," she answered, happy that diversionary tactics were working. At least, for the moment they were.

"So, how much did we find yesterday?"

"Twenty-seven pieces of assorted silver, gold, and bronze. And it's all mine," she answered. Well, so much for diversionary tactics. He'd gotten right to the point, possibly because he knew her too well and knew she would try something like that, but that was beside anything of any pertinence whatsoever.

"Why's it all yours?" he demanded

"You ran off without claiming your share," Sparry explained with a shrug. "I assumed that meant you didn't want it."

"Now you're assuming," Will pointed out, his eyes narrowing. "That's not fair! You were making fun of me, anyway. Of course I was gonna run off."

"That's not my fault,"

"Actually, it is."

"Actually, it's your Uncle Jack's," corrected Sparry, confident she could have the last word and lift all blame from herself in one fell swoop. Will reached over and snatched a gold coin out of the pile.

"Come on, I earned these fair and square, just like you did," he whined. "I'll fight you for them," he offered.

"Swords or fists?" Sparry asks suspiciously, knowing Will could best her with a wooden sword any day of the week but also knowing she could pummel him if it came down to unarmed combat. "It would appear we're not evenly matched."

"So I'll use a sword and you can use your fists," he shrugged. "Then we're both at our best."

"Will, think about that for a second," sighed Sparry. "If you use a sword against little unarmed me, I'll still lose."

"That was kind of the idea," he admitted.

"That's not fair," she exclaimed. "Pirate!" Will grinned sheepishly. "If you weren't gonna fight fair, why are you so worried the loot's divvied up even?"

"That's different," Will answered like it was obvious. "That's loot. And I'd naturally get a bigger share. I'm captain."

"I need it more than you do," scoffed Sparry, reaching across the table and plucking the coin out of his fingers. "It's mine, anyways. I'm not gonna share."

"I shared my boat."

"That was our boat. We found it together, remember? You just up and decided it was yours."

There was a reason Will and Sparry's fights never got past words – neither of them could come up with a medium where it was fair. Verbal arguments were the only place they were evenly matched, and then one could argue they weren't even simply because Sparry's argument, more often than not, was full of more holes than mosquito netting.

"If it was our boat, then it was our loot," countered Will. This was about where Sparry's logic always broke down. And usually, it was knocked dead by wounds she inflicted on it herself. Perhaps she realized she had lost? Thought Will, who inched his hand towards the coins. His mother had once said, after overhearing one of their arguments, that Sparry had 'barmaid logic' – that was, she used arguments to stall, and if she won, it was just incidental. If you thought about it, everything went up in smoke.

"Call it a mutiny," said Sparry. "You stole my spot as captain, I steal your loot."

At least she was admitting it now, thought Will as he tried to come up with something to counter that. "I propose an inverse mutiny," he said, finally. There! That sounded fancy!

"There's no such thing!" scowled Sparry.

"Now there is. I'm inventing it."

"You can't do that."

"Yes I can. Um, in the pirate's code-"

"Pirates have a code?" asked Sparry, quirking an eyebrow. Maybe she'd heard of that, once or twice, but never anything confirming.

"Pirates have a government. My mum's king of it," boasted Will. Which makes me prince, he added silently, but dared not say it because he was trying to win Sparry over, not annoy her further.

"I knew that," muttered Sparry, knocking a coin against the table and shifting in her seat. She didn't need to be reminded that her mother was doing nothing to encourage her desire to be a pirate, unlike Will's mother who was raising him to do just that. "So, how's a counter-mutiny work?"

"You give me my share of the loot," suggested Will, taking a coin, "And I make you co-captain. Evens in everything."

"I want the map," said Sparry, glad that was settled. "You can have the telescope. We split the coins." In her mind, she had won the argument – she was co-captain now! Sure, it wasn't her original intention, but it had gone over well. She'd driven a hard bargain, after all. What was a bit of gold in trade for power, anyway?

Will was happy as well. He'd beaten Sparry's barmaid logic again and gotten his loot back, fair and square. So he'd had to give up a little power, but what was that compared to coming up even and getting his justly deserved gold?