It was a big day for the Bartowski family. A very big day.
Seven months before, Chuck had sold the video game "Mindnode" to Electronic Arts. Its premise was very familiar – an unsuspecting individual gets a large government database accidentally downloaded into his head and has to use the information to help two government agents take down bad guys – although he'd mixed it up a little, and used a CIA agent and a British MI-6 agent instead of an NSA agent.
When John Casey had heard about it, he had said, "I'd call it plagiarism, except you're only plagiarizing yourself. How dare you."
Nonetheless, Electronic Arts had paid Chuck six hundred thousand dollars for the game, enough for him and Morgan to form the start-up Nerd Cave Video Games. Five months later, they had turned around and sold another game to Activision for two million dollars.
The first game, though, was being released to the public tomorrow – Tuesday, September 21st, 2010. However, E.A. had offered Chuck the chance to have a big release party for it the day before, at the location of his choice.
Because Chuck was a rather loyal person, he had chosen the Buy More in Burbank to hold the release party. Needless to say, Big Mike was ecstatic, though his employees were less than thrilled at the extra work that they had to put in to get the store ready.
Of course, Electronic Arts decided that they were going to make it a big red carpet event. They invited in the actors that they had had do voices for the game – Lee Pace as the civilian, Kristen Bell as the CIA agent, and Gareth David-Lloyd as the MI-6 agent.
When Sarah found out about all that – and especially about David-Lloyd, who she'd had somewhat of a celebrity crush on since meeting him at Comic-Con two years before – she had told Chuck that there was no way in hell they were going to show up in the Beast. "You're the creator of this game," she insisted, "and there will be famous people on hand. We are taking the Porsche."
"I'll have to drive," he warned her.
"I am painfully aware of that."
Unfortunately, all of Sarah's formal wear was designed for a woman who was NOT seven months pregnant with twins. She complained about it one night to Chuck and Devin one night, who were busy watching the Lakers get their asses kicked by the Phoenix Suns.
She hadn't even thought they were listening, but the next morning, a very haughty woman with a measuring tape had shown up at the front door of the house, ordered Sarah to stick her arms out, and had taken several measurements. The morning after that, a delivery driver had dropped off an incredible dress.
The dress was made of a cloth that made Sarah's skin tingle when she touched it. Forest green with very subtle grey accents, it fit Sarah like a glove, but when she saw the "Oscar de la Renta" tag on the bag, she had just about had a heart attack. Of course, that was before she saw the attached note.
Knock 'em dead, kid, it said. It was signed, Art Graham.
She smiled and shook her head. Leave it to Chuck to contact the former CIA director about something like that.
And so, at 11:00 AM on Monday the 20th, Sarah's Porsche 911 rolled up to the red carpet in front of the Buy More at the Empire Power Center in Burbank. A white gloved valet opened her door, while Chuck, looking fantastic – AS ALWAYS, the bastard, she though – in a tuxedo, jumped out and ran around to help her out.
They had gotten maybe five feet down the carpet toward the front door of the Buy More when an obnoxiously perky reporter popped in front of them. "Kristin Dos Santos, E! News!" she announced. They both stopped, Sarah blowing out her breath and rolling her eyes. Then she saw the camera.
Oh, Jesus H. Christ.
"So, Mr. Bartowski, what was the inspiration for your video game?"
Sarah's breath caught in her chest. What the hell was Chuck going to say to that?
"What can I say," he answered smoothly. "It just came to me one day. I have to give one of my college buddies a little credit for it – he sent me an e-mail, and as I was reading it, well, it just sort of popped into my head."
Sarah smiled and tried not to laugh. To think that Chuck had just told this woman EXACTLY what had happened, and yet, she had no idea.
"And you must be Mrs. Bartowski!" Dos Santos said.
"Sarah," she replied. "Please."
"Well, it looks like you're gonna be adding to your family pretty soon – you look just about ready to pop!"
Lord, give me patience, Sarah thought, eyeing the woman's neck and wondering how much pressure she'd have to apply to knock her out. "Still got about another two months – twins," Sarah said.
Kristin Dos Santos was about to ask Chuck another question, but he'd spotted Kristen Bell, and was suddenly dragging Sarah off that direction. Sarah couldn't help but laugh as the entertainment "reporter" was left in their dust, mouth gaping open like a beached fish.
The event went quite well, although about an hour into it, Sarah suddenly found herself having to use the restroom about every fifteen minutes. It was not pleasant – first of all, she hated public restrooms. Secondly, there was quite the line. Third – and this was most definitely the worst part of her day – she discovered that it was quite impossible for her to shut the door behind her in the Buy More's normal stalls, and ended up having to use the handicapped stall every single time.
When she came out of the restroom after the fourth time with a look of murderous rage on her face, Chuck quickly got up from the table. "Uh, Big Mike," he said, approaching his former boss. "Do you think I could get the key to the employee restroom and give it to Sarah? She's having to use the restroom pretty regularly here, and I think she might go set the Large Mart on fire if she has to use the restroom here one more time."
"Yeah, no problem," Big Mike replied. "LESTER!"
Lester came scurrying over – dressed in a yellow polo? "When the hell did you get promoted to assistant manager?" Chuck asked, incredulous.
"Not too long back," Lester replied.
"He ain't lived up to his potential yet," Big Mike grumbled.
"Come on, Big Mike, I had to follow Harry Tang and this taskmaster," Lester complained, indicating Chuck.
"Yeah, well, tough," Big Mike replied. "You're gettin' paid the same that they did, I expect the same level of work. Gimme the key to the employee restroom."
"What?"
"Mrs. Bartowski needs a restroom she can go to where she doesn't have to stand in line with all these other people."
Lester's face took on a comical look of horror. "Wait a second," he replied. "That means I have to go urinate with the common folk!"
Chuck rolled his eyes as Big Mike handed him the key to the employee restroom. "Don't forget to return it, Bartowski!"
"Yes, sir, Big Mike," Chuck replied – and then mentally smacked himself. He hadn't worked here for seven months, and yet he was still calling Big Mike "sir".
He walked back to Sarah and handed her the key. "It's the employee restroom," he told her. "Probably cleaner than the public ones, no line."
She smiled. A year and a half they'd been married, and Chuck still took it upon himself to do all those little things that made her fall in love with him in the first place. "Thank you."
Sarah stood and headed off toward the employee restroom. Chuck tried not to shake his head as she walked away.
"Excuse me, are you Chuck Bartowski?"
Chuck turned his head to the right – and stood up so fast that he knocked his chair over. "Jesus Christ! I mean, George Clooney!"
Clooney smiled. "Not quite the first time, but right the second."
"Wow!" Chuck gasped. "I mean, I can't believe you're here, at the release party for my game!"
"Well, I came because it occurs to me that this would make a fantastic movie," Clooney replied. "I wanted to talk to you about that possibility."
Chuck rested his chin on his hand. "You… want to turn my game into a movie?"
"Yeah," Clooney answered. "I figure, use Lee Pace, Kristen Bell, Gareth David-Lloyd in the starring roles – bit of continuity from the game."
"Wow," Chuck said again. "Um, there's people who I need to speak with…"
Just then, Sarah returned from the bathroom. "Uh, Sarah, this is George Clooney," Chuck said. "This is my wife, Sarah Bartowski."
"Pleasure to meet you," he said, taking the hand of a very shocked Sarah. "I was just talking to your husband about the possibility of turning the game into a feature film."
Sarah's right eyebrow went up. "Uh… Chuck, can I talk to you for a moment?"
He nodded. "I'll give you two a minute," Clooney said, and walked off, calling Lee Pace's name as he went.
"Do you think the CIA will go for it?" Chuck asked Sarah.
She blew her breath out slowly. "I really don't know," she said. "I could've gotten Director Graham to sign off on it, but I don't know about this new director, Sam Tyler… he seems like a bit of a hardass."
"What about the NSA?"
"I'm sure Casey can grease the skids some, but they're gonna be even more difficult."
Chuck sighed. "Come on. They let me release the video game. I don't think I'd even be involved with the movie, except like as a producer or something."
"I just don't know," Sarah said.
Clooney returned then. "So…"
"Let's go for it," Chuck said, to Sarah's surprise.
"Great!" Clooney said, his face breaking into a smile. "Why don't you give me your card… and I'll have my people at Section 8 contact you."
Chuck smiled back. "Sounds good," he replied, reaching into his jacket and pulling out a Nerd Cave business card.
Clooney took the card, shook Chuck's hand, and walked off again. "Are you out of your mind?" Sarah asked angrily.
"I believe that I have given enough to the government that they owe me," Chuck replied.
"Yeah, well, what about me?" Sarah said. "I'm your WIFE and you didn't listen to a word I said!"
That one stopped Chuck short. "I… I really thought you'd be okay with it," he answered. "I mean, you've always…"
His face fell. "I'm sorry… I mean, he's right over there, I can go tell him no…"
And then he turned the puppy dog eyes on her. The expression that invariably ended up with Sarah either 1) acceding to his request, 2) getting naked, or 3) both. "That's foul play, Chuck," she grumbled.
A little bit of a smile broke out on his face. "Oh, ALRIGHT," she sighed. "I'll make it work with the agencies."
"Have I told you lately how much I love you?" he asked, the smile turning huge.
She shook her head, smiling ruefully. "No, but you can show me by going over to Large Mart and getting me the biggest bottle of water they have. Nobody told me that pregnancy was going to end up with more water coming out of me than I can take in at once."
"Okay, seriously, too much information," Chuck informed her, standing.
Five minutes later, he was back, handing her a liter bottle of Arrowhead water. "That big enough for you?"
"Mmm-hmmm," she replied, as she sucked it down like a camel just come out of the desert after two months.
She stood up to stretch out her back, and walked across the store, drinking the water. Morgan came up behind Chuck, watching Sarah suck the water down in disbelief. "That's just unnatural," he uttered.
Chuck's face immediately went from curious to pissed-off. He slowly turned his head toward Morgan, and said, "If you ever talk about my wife that way again, I will put a deadbolt on the Morgan Door."
Because yes, there was indeed a Morgan Door on the house in Studio City.