Mary Sue Pirates Beware!
ch 5
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Jack waltzed down the corridor and up onto the deck of his ship. Using all of his skills of cunning and stealth, he managed to sneak his way up into the crow's nest, after narrowly avoiding a terrifying woman wearing nothing but an exotic snake. The crow's nest was quickly becoming his most treasured place of solitude. Maybe it had something to do with the booby traps that he had cunningly laid on the ratlines that discouraged the women from sneaking up there, but maybe not.
Jack took a moment to appreciate the scenery of the sea at night, then took another moment to appreciate a large gulp of rum from the bottle clasped in his hand. Ah, that was much better. The blurrier his vision, the clearer his thoughts, or so Jack had often told Anamaria.
A large belch worked its way out of Jack. He considered his situation.
All of these women springing up couldn't just be coincidence. Well, obviously it wasn't. But the real question, the one at the heart of it all, was what made his ship the bloody magnet? What was it the magnet of? The girl Ericalotte's tale of another world, she wasn't the first to be so obviously insane. Maybe she wasn't. Maybe there was something going on that made all of these women cropping up make sense.
Jack took another gulp of his rum and searched his brain for anything that might be an answer. He tried to remember the tales he'd heard from other pirates like himself, and tried to sort out the real ones from the ones spun by pirates a little too cooked by the sun.
Suddenly, the answer hit Jack like a ton of wet bricks coated in sobriety. Of course! Why hadn't he thought of that before!
Jack leapt up from his dignified sprawl and swung down the ratlines with gusto. Most men would be terrified to be two stories high and dangling only from ropes, but Jack didn't mind. He carefully avoided the ratline that he had booby trapped with dead squid. With little more than a soft thump, he landed on the deck and set to finding Mr. Gibbs.
"Gibbs, matey," he said heartily, looping his arm around the man with the muttonchops. Jack had found Gibbs in front of the fire in the galley, eating a quick dinner before taking his watch. "Pour yerself some more rum and let's have a drink."
"Well Jack, you're seeming pretty chipper," Gibbs grunted while pouring himself some more rum, not needing Jack to tell him twice. "What's in yer head?"
Jack circled around the table Gibbs was at and sat across from him. He clapped Gibbs on the shoulder cheerfully and gave him a wink. "Well, Gibbs me fine man, it just so happens that I've figured it all out."
Gibbs perked up. "Figured what out, Jack?" he asked. "Figured how to rid us of all these women? I've said it once and I'll say it again, 'tis bad luck to have a woman – "
"Partly, yes," Jack replied. He watched Gibbs shrewdly while the man took another drink of rum. "I've figured how we get them off."
Gibbs leaned in. Jack looked at him for a moment, then took a sip from his own flask of rum. "World's Eye," he said softly and distinctly. Gibbs jolted backwards, alarmed, then looked around and composed himself. He leaned in and whispered at Jack.
"Yer joking!" Gibb's eyes roved around the room. "Those that go to the World's Eye pay a dreadful price. You've heard the tales."
Jack raised an eyebrow. "It's a price I'm willing to pay. Look at me, Gibbs," he said, leaning back in his chair and throwing his arms wide theatrically. "I'm but a shadow of the man I once was. Look at me! Do I look like a man who is whole?"
Gibbs raised his mug again and surveyed Jack. "You never looked to be all there, Captain," he said respectfully. Jack looked Gibbs in the eye. "The World's Eye, Jack?" he whimpered.
Jack nodded. "It's the only way," he intoned.
Gibbs set about resigning himself to traveling towards the World's Eye instead of away from it. Jack rose in his graceful, drunken way and went to find Anamaria.
He found her coming back from a successful patrol. The two stopped to talk in the shadow of the main mast.
"Anamaria, love, I've got it figured," Jack began. Anamaria looked hopeful and waited for him to continue. "Me and Gibbs came up with it ourselves. If we're ever going to straighten out this mess," Jack waved expansively at the deck, on which Olivia and a buxom redhead were preparing to do a vaudeville show complete with tiny, sparkly outfits and scarves, "we've got to get some answers." Anamaria glared at the girls and began to stalk over to them to shoo them back into the bilge.
Jack's hand on her shoulder stopped her. "We're sailin' to the World's Eye," he said gently.
Anamaria froze and looked at him incredulously. Then she went to lean against the main mast.
"The World's Eye doesn't exist, Captain," Anamaria said. Jack smiled and swayed back and forth a little bit.
"Doesn't it? I used to hear that 'bout the Pearl all the time," Jack said.
"If it does exist, why would we want to go there?" Anamaria asked. "Isn't it the gaping mouth of hell?"
Jack grinned. "Ah, now here's where the story gets muddled. Some say the World's Eye is the mystic place where the mysteries of the ages are revealed to those who ask the right questions." He watched for Anamaria's reaction. She seemed nonplussed. "Others say it's the gaping mouth of hell." He shrugged. "It's up to one's interpretation."
Anamaria watched her captain, feeling a little angry. "We're sailing into maybe the gaping mouth of hell, captain?" she asked. Jack seemed uncomfortable at her phrasing, but nodded. "Wonderful plan, sir," she snapped feistily.
"That's right. If we don't make it out alive I'll maybe admit I've been cheating you at cards for two years." Jack grinned at her. "Savvy?"
Anamaria pushed past him to break up the vaudeville show, which had attracted most of the other sailors, if not Jack Sparrow. "Savvy," she muttered. No matter which way she turned it, she didn't like sailing into death.
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AN: Ok, actual plot, here I come! This is going to be weird for me but I'm going to try. Review and tell me what ya think!