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The story about a girl who taught a boy a little something called hope...
C R O S S
Chapter F O U R
Fumbling Towards Ecstasy
Do you believe in God?
...Not really.
But why?
The breeze lightly traced Tohru's skin as she waited jubilantly in front of the church doors, letting the beautiful weather raise her spirits even higher as she smoothed down her pale pink skirt and long sleeved white shirt, completely psyched for the school festival. Tohru looked around the corner for about the third time and then glanced at her watch. It was 5:30, the time when Kyo was supposed to arrive, but the streets were still empty. She turned her head and glanced at the corner again, and finally spotted his orange hair approaching her from the end of the sidewalk; her heart flipped. Tohru waved at him excitedly, calling out,
"Kyo-kun!"
Kyo barely lifted up his lips as he smiled half heartedly at her, the uncertainty lurking clearly in his maroon colored eyes as he got closer to her. She walked up beside him, and wanted to erase any uneasiness that he was feeling as soon as possible, and she was sure that the festival was just the medicine for his unnecessary doubts.
Bright balloons and nicely crafted booths filled the lively room as Tohru and Kyo entered through the green sliding doors to the room 2A where laughter and chattering stuffed up their ears. Tohru smiled at Kyo's still doleful face and saw her two friends standing by one of the game booths, Uo had a green ball in one of her hands, and was aiming at the standing bottles behind the booth, ready to knock every single one down. Just as her hand was about to thrust forward, Tohru's cheerful voice caused them both to turn around,
"Meet Uo-chan and Hana-chan!"
Tohru stood next to them with her companion standing idly by, watching the dirty blonde haired girl, and the creepy looking one with wary eyes. Tohru pointed at both of the girls, and Uo was unable to conceal the look of surprise at Tohru's new friend. Uo swiftly took one look at his blazing hair and teased playfully,
"Hey carrot top."
Kyo's face burned as he returned her comment with a seething glare, yelling out,
"What did you call me!"
Uo laughed at his extreme sensitivity and looked at Tohru, asking with a jesting smile,
"Who's your angry friend here?"
"Yes... his vibes are very ferocious..." said Hana with her usual insights.
Tohru's eyes nervously darted between the the three of them, trying to ease any tension by blurting out in a high pitched voice,
"Th-this is Sohma Kyo!"
Uo gave him another once over, and then held out her rough hand, waiting for him to give her a polite handshake, but instead she only got a hesitating stare. After an awkward ten seconds, Kyo reluctantly placed his hand into hers, shaking it tersely before promptly dropping her hand like a log and stuffing his hand right back into his jacket pocket. Uo gave him a look that said, "how-rude," but he ignored it as she folded her arms across her chest,
"Nice to meet ya, carrot top."
"Stop callin' me that!" Kyo fumed.
Tohru bit her lower lip, trying to think of a way to stop the impending battle as Hana drawled out,
"Their battle auras are quite fierce... Uo, let us finish our game. Tohru, would you like to play next?"
Tohru shook her head politely in return and gave a pointed look to Kyo,
"It's okay! I want to show Kyo-kun around anyway. I'll see you guys later!"
Tohru gave them a wave and they turned back to their booth, while Tohru started to snake around the crowd, Kyo following closely behind. Kyo glanced to the right and to the left, feeling the biting stares of other students boring into his skin.
Why the hell are they all looking at me!
He felt his body overheating as they both stopped in front of the food booth where there were all kinds of colorful foods on display. Tohru fidgeted with her thumbs for a moment and then pointed up a finger, biting her lip apologetically,
"I'm so sorry, but I have to use the bathroom for just one second! I'll be back very quick."
He grumbled grouchily in return as she gave him one last lingering puppy dog stare before rushing off to the bathroom while he stood like an idiot at the food both. Alone.
Three girls a few feet away saw him from a distance and one of them whispered to the others,
"That boy is really hot isn't he?"
Another girl with black hair nodded while eyeing Kyo like a hawk,
"He really is! He looks like a model or something..."
"I think he's a new guy or something...let's go talk to him."
The others agreed immediately and strided over to the food booth with big grins on their faces while they watched intently as Kyo was about to purchase some onigiri. He retracted the money from his wallet though, when he saw the three girls advancing towards him like a lion would on its prey. He avoided making eye contact as he stepped away from them, not wanting to involve himself with hordes of girls. It was too late though, they had already surrounded him, and caused a few more girls to join in with curiosity. Kyo backed up against the window with fear in his eyes as the girls began to talk to him all at once as if he were some sort of celebrity; one bold girl stepped forward and introduced herself sweetly to Kyo,
"Hi! My name is Naru! What's your name?"
Tohru entered the classroom again after using the bathroom and surveyed the room for Kyo, but he was nowhere to be seen, instead she saw a crowd of girls excitedly infesting the area nearby the window. Confusion seeped into her features as she craned her neck forward to see what the whole fuss was about, but her question was soon answered when she heard Kyo's agonizing scream echo throughout the classroom as he forcefully pushed Naru away. He then slammed the window open, and leaped out of it without even a second of hesitation. The student's mouths dropped open and Uo commented calmly,
"Jeez, that guy sure knows how to make a scene,"
Naru rubbed her shoulder and whined,
"Oww, he pushed me! I can't believe him!"
"That was the second floor window!" exclaimed another girl who was staring after him as he landed perfectly on all fours, galloping away like some wild animal that had just broke loose from the imprisonment of a cage.
"Yeah, what the hell was that about?" piped up another girl who was completely astonished at the boy's rash actions. Tohru's eyes were wide with shock as she stood there for a moment before she turned her heels, running out of the quickest exit to catch up to Kyo.
She ran around the school for a bit, and finally found him leaning against the beige brick wall, breathing heavily and his eyes wild with bewilderment as he was staring down at the flailing grass. She slowly walked closer to him with caution as she softly apologized,
"I'm sorry... for bringing you here."
His breathing rate slowed down as he raked a hand through his messy hair, letting the fresh air wash over him as he leaned his head back against the cool brick, replying back gruffly,
"Whatever. It's fine. I just... I'm not a people person, so you can go back inside and have fun. I'm gonna go home."
Her eyes widened in alarm as she insisted,
"No, no, wait! ... I can't abandon you like that."
"It's fine," he replied flatly.
What do I say to make him stay?
She racked her brain for what seemed like a sweating minute, and spilled out in a high pitched voice,
"U-um... do you want to go somewhere else then? Um.. Ice cream? Movies? I don't mind!"
He peered up at her nervous figure and muttered back tiredly,
"I know you want to be in there."
"No, no! It's completely fine!" she almost screamed out.
Tohru gulped and then paused for a moment, letting the words just tumble out,
"Do you want to go to the roof of the school?"
He was taken aback by her request as he uttered out,
"What?"
She continued with her cheerfulness,
"At night... they have these fireworks, and no on goes up to the rooftop, they usually go outside, so you don't have to deal with anyone, and you can enjoy the fireworks! They're really beautiful at night..."
He acquiesced reluctantly,
"...Fine... but only for a little bit though."
The wind got colder as the sky was painted a darker shade.
Tohru and Kyo sat on top of the roof together, side by side; Kyo with his legs splayed out in front of him in a messy manner, and Tohru with her knees against her chest. Her voice broke the peaceful silence,
"Kyo?"
Kyo responded back with zero enthusiasm,
"Hnh?"
"Do you believe in God?"
Where did that come from!
He held back an irritated scoff and answered back with a nonchalant shrug,
"...Not really."
Her eyes showcased curiosity as she asked,
"But why?"
"I don't mean to pry," she added in quickly to be polite.
He felt himself shrug again as he struggled to say,
"With all the things I've seen and been through... I just don't believe that He really cares about me, or any of us for that matter."
"But you believe in his existence, so doesn't that mean you believe?"
He squirmed in his spot and sighed, looking up at the solitary star that blinked quietly back at him,
"Okay, fine, what I meant to say was that, yeah, I think that someone's up there and all... but I just don't believe that He's all that Holy pure goodness crap that everyone else is always talking about. I mean, what has He ever done for me? What has He ever done for us? Seriously, look at all the bad shit that happens out in the world everyday..."
She stared ahead for a moment, taking in his rantings before softly speaking,
"My mom... she used to tell me that whenever bad things happened to people, they would always get discouraged and stop believing... but no matter what, there would always, always, be good things waiting for everyone at the end of the darkness."
She glanced sideways at him and continued,
"There's always bad times in everyone's lives... but just remember that after the biggest storms, the most beautiful flowers bloom, and after the hardest pain is the biggest strength...so I guess what I'm trying to say is that even though when things are looking grim, the reward that comes after is ten times better, we just have to be patient with things. So... whenever you're feeling sad, just think about the happiness that's waiting on the other end. And if you're ever in grief, just know that you'll be saved... maybe not directly by God...but he'll surely send a message...maybe even a gift..."
"A gift? What are you talking about?"
Her cheeks burned as she hugged her knees closer to her chest, laughing out nervously,
"I'm sorry! I'm just rambling, aren't I? Um... forget what I said."
Her advice sounds so corny and downright stupid... but...
He shook his head and let a smile slip onto his lips unknowingly. She caught his small smile, and grinned at him,
"You smiled! Is it something I said?"
Her words are inspiring...
Kyo opened his mouth, and then lazily waved his hand in mid-air,
"It's nothing."
It sounds stupid...doesn't it?
"Ah! The firewords are beginning!"
She sat up straight, and gazed up at the fireworks bursting through the air, sending streaks of various colors splashing across the scenery. Kyo watched along with her, looking up at the fireworks blooming in the sky, lighting up the city with its grand beauty.
Without control, he felt his eyes travel to the side, towards his companion, but she didn't notice his stare as he watched her face glow from yellow, to green, to red; she was so entranced by the fireworks that she didn't even move an inch while she gawked upwards with her mouth hanging ajar in a silly little smile of satisfaction.
I don't think I've ever met...
She finally broke her gaze away from the fireworks, and beamed at him with her cherry red lips, her face exuding happiness as she asked with excitement,
"Aren't they beautiful?"
someone quite like this before...
He leaned his head back, to look once more at the bursting sparks that covered the sky, and then tilted his head in her direction, answering back with half a mutter and a murmur,
"They're... nice."
A real friend.
"I see you came back."
Kyo stood in the third row of the church, and the reverend was standing at the end of his row, his mustache rising up along with his lips as he looked straight at Kyo with a friendly smile. Kyo glanced at him with celerity, and then gave the reverend a crooked smile, looking straight ahead at the choir that was standing three rows ahead, singing a song of praise at the top of their lungs, and he replied back wistfully,
"I guess some people can really have an effect on you."
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