Disclaimer: Statement: This particular meatbag does not own or claim to own the games Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic or Mass Effect for fear of execution.
Proud Declaration: Instead these games are copyrighted to the exceptional men and women of the Bioware Corporation, Lucas Arts and Microsoft game studios.
Dedication: With regards to the only meatbag I ever liked, Osamu Tezuka. (Along with the Master, of course. Nice Master. Good Master)
Designation: I am Enslaved
Captain Anderson, now Councilman Anderson rubbed his eyes in exhaustion. When Commander Shepard had recommended him the post, he was more than willing to take up the cause, representing humanity. Little did he know about the daily stress he would undergo in the confines of his white prison, or rather office?
Since he represented humanity that meant he had to meet with their Ambassador, frequently. This was…awkward since their last meeting ended with him knocking a molar out of Udina's mouth. Udina constantly brought it up, along with his constant lectures of the Alliance's interests, how to debate properly and making sure he wasn't dressing up like a slob."You call that a uniform?"
Along with Udina's constant lectures, the Council had given him more pressures than usual. The Asari and Salarian Councilmen gave him all the help he needed. In fact, when Captain Anderson almost forgot his written speech in front of the Elcor interest groups, the Asari Councilwoman just happened to find it.
The same could not be said for the Turian Councilman. Prior to his membership, Anderson suspected that he was slightly biased against humanity. He was wrong. The Turian Councilman was totally biased against humanity. With such insults such as, "tiny little intellect," "untamed upper mane," and the ever popular, "ugliest uniform I've ever seen. Honestly, who dresses you?"
But Captain Anderson wasn't rubbing his eyes neither because of the Ambassador's speeches or the Council's constant demands. He rubbed his temples because of the wild request from the person who brought him here in the first place.
"So, what do you think?" Commander Shepard hoped for pleasant answer.
"Let me see if I understand this correctly. You found a sentient AI on the ship the Alliance just found, and decided to try to make peace with the Geth."
"Hey," Wrex said, leaning against the corner. "I like him." Anderson groaned and pounded his head on his desk.
"You're not making my life any easier, Shepard."
"We have to at least try. Maybe, the ship we found has more answers."
"That ship's more trouble than its worth!" Anderson leapt from his seat. "One of the repairmen set off the turret and it cost us a billion credits in damages. I've put all my power so that the Council doesn't find out about this. Can you imagine the sort of panic that could cause if the public hears about this?"
Williams eyed her Omni-tool as the message was relayed. "Like the one outside Citadel Tower, right now?
"Please, my…escort was not aware of the officer's position." Liara had frantically tried to find the words, trying to quell the people staring at them. "He fired out of self-defense!"
"Correction: This man tried to fire at my computing unit. That therefore makes him guilty of murder. Ergo, his punishment is a searing hot blaster wound to his kneecap. Would anyone like to be the prosecutor? For I will be judge, juror and executioner. Emphasis on Executioner."
Nearby, fingers tapped quickly on the Omni-tool. Columns and columns data poured down as it downloaded into its intended database. One that belonged to a certain droid.
"Error! Error: File is being corrupted. Override function is activated. Oh my, it seems as though someone is hacking through my-"
The droid fell silent as it heard a voice whisper into his mind. Unlike the pleasant suggestion on how to eliminate its next target, HK heard a voice. A female, wobbly voice.
I apologize for my behavior. HK felt as if meatbag arms had reached into his CPU and started drilling into it.
Reluctantly, it uttered, "Apology: I apologize for my behavior."
My CPU is obviously inferior to the fine VI's on this station. HK felt used. This voice not only told him to belittle itself, but to compare itself to a tourist interface. The indignity!
"Justification: My CPU is obviously inferior to the fine VI's on this station."
I'm going to hand over my rifle now. Do as you please. Never! It could never give its most prized possession. The rifle that fell 1000 men, the rifle that earned him the title assassin. It wasn't going to-
"Statement:" It couldn't. It had more dignity than this.
"I'm going to hand over my rifle now." It dropped the rifle as a C-Sec officer grabbed it. It had failed. As the C-Sec officer surrounded it, HK realized how limited it was. It was another slave like the Twi'leks to the Hutts. HK realized how its sentience was a lie.
She had done it. Hacking into the droid was easily the highlight of her day. She just tapped the code and whispered into the Omni-tool. She was glad.
"Tali!" Garrus had run up to the balcony overseeing the incident. "Where were you?"
"That's not important. It looks like the droid's going to need a lawyer."
The Presidium held home to one of the most important structures needed to survive, Citadel Tower. There, the Council had heard cases either politically, the Hanar wanting religious freedom, or a great criminal defense.
On the lower balconies and the stairs leading up were rows and rows of news crews, wanting a peace of the action. Above the court stood the balcony, consisting of the Salarian, Asari and Turian Councilmen, waiting for their newest member. It didn't help that the defendant was rather…talkative.
"Query: Where's my lawyer? Where's my ship? Where's my blaster? I demand justice. I demand action. I demand someone let me kill something.
Pleading Request: Oh please, merciful court. Don't execute the serial killer. Just give him to me so I may end his life."
The Turian Councilman grew impatient. "Will somebody shut this thing up? It's bad enough we have to wait for someone who doesn't have the decency to be punctual, but listening to this thing-"
The Asari Councilwoman raised her hand. "The defendant has the right to speak his-"
"It." The Salarian Councilman corrected.
"Its mind."
"We might as well get the meeting started." The Turian Councilman was not pleased with humanity's quick seating on the Council. His people were like children, they needed discipline, possibly years of work. But he had to admit, only for a second, that Shepard did save them all, and it did show Humanity's maturity. But did he have to pick Anderson? The man was a philistine. Uneducated in the complexities of politics. Better than that hothead Udina, he supposed.
"He isn't coming."
"Actually, Councilman," Anderson said, coming from behind. "I just had to take care of some things."
Below, Commander Shepard had just arrived with Chief Gunnery Williams and his Krogan companion. Also arriving was Ambassador Udina.
"What are they doing here?" The Turian Councilman gave fierce look, making his lower sides of his jaw, separate.
"I'm defending this droid." Shepard said bluntly.
"Well, technically I am." Udina quickly added. The news reporters all gasped. They muttered and whispered about how a Specter was defending a synthetic.
"Are you claiming this…thing is yours?" The Turian Councilman's voice grew considerably.
"I'm not claiming ownership of this droid." Shepard said. Udina sighed. For once, things would be easy.
"I'm saying this droid is my friend, and I'm making sure justice is served for him." Almost immediately, all the reporters began typing on their Omni-tools on the hero of the Citadel was now a Geth-lover. Udina was going to have a rough night.
"Very well. Let us begin this trial."
A man rose to start the trail. "Now the case of Citadel Security v. Synthetic shall begin."
"Defendant," The Asari Councilwoman began. "How do you plead to the charges of shooting a C-Sec officer, unprovoked."
"Statement: Not Guilty."
"Your honors," Executor Paladin, had spoken up. "There's no case here, I have all the evidence I need right here." The Security officer from before had shown up and revealed the hole that was his kneecap.
"As you can see, my officer was shot. His hospital bill payment and a proper apology is all we're asking for."
"Observation: If an apology is all your asking for, then that is what you shall receive.
Apology: I'm sorry that you have the maturity of an infant, and the accuracy of a near-sighted grandmother. Query: Is that sufficient, meatbag?"
The C-Sec officer started advancing towards him while the crowd grew restless.
"Order! Order! Droid, why did you shoot the officer?"
"Statement: The man had fired upon me first; this cloak proves it all." Liara pulled out the cloak, and showed it all to the council the holes.
"Why were you wearing a cloak in the first place?" The Asari Councilwoman asked.
"Statement: I had done it under the wishes of my master as to not be revealed for my true purpose."
"Objection!" Udina had said quickly, "Relevance."
"The droid may have been concealing a bomb of some sort, giving the Citadel Security Officer reason for firing." The Salarian Councilman stated.
"Nonsense! You don't fire at a bomb!"
"It was just an example."
"Reassurance: Fear not, meatbag Councilman, I am merely a translator for-"
"Other species whose languages we might not know about." Udina had to work fast in order to save Humanity's already crumbling image.
"Like the Geth." Shepard said. Udina gritted his teeth and heard all the sounds of the news crews shouting and calling their agencies. Humanity had made it on the 6 o'clock news…again.
The Turian Councilman gritted his teeth in fury. "Geth? What are you planning, Shepard?"
"It's simple. This droid can single-handedly get the Geth on our side. We don't have to fight two wars."
"No, we just have to make friends with synthetics, like agent Saren suggested." The crowd gave a loud murmur.
"Are you saying we should send out fleets into the Terminus System?" Shepard asked. Everyone knew sending fleets there would trigger another war no one needed.
"I'm saying that trying to forge an Alliance between synthetics is a bad idea. How can you even be sure that this droid will be loyal to you?"
"Answer: Because the Commander has promised me to give me back my ship."
"Ship?" the Salarian Councilman asked. "What ship?"
"Statement: The Ebon Hawk, sir, the very ship I was found on. As a matter of fact, Master, have the repairs been completed?" The crowd gasped as the story of the hour had just become the story of the century. All at once, the 3 alien Councilmen glared at Anderson.
"You knew about a derelict ship from another galaxy," The Turian Councilman fumed, "and didn't even tell us?"
"No, I didn't. But we're getting off track. I thought this was about the shooting."
"He's right." The Asari Councilwoman said. "But we're going to have a long talk about this, after the trial."
"Now then," The Salarian Councilman said to the C-Sec officer, "What's your testimony, Officer Smith?"
"This synthetic called me a name, and I was provoked."
"And what name was that?" the Salarian Councilman.
"Statement: Meatbag."
"Why did you call the officer that?"
"Explication: It is simply a name. By scientific fact, a majority of the body is made up of water. The organs of course, are therefore squishy and the skin retains water. Therefore, he is a meatbag, as is my master."
"…"
The crowd stood silent for a while. There were unsure if the Droid was serious, or was telling a bad joke.
"I think we've heard enough." The Captain said. "Let's take a vote."
On their monitors, all of the Council voted.
"In a unanimous vote, we find the defendant Not Guilty on the basis that the Officer couldn't have made the shot if he was shot first, and could've ignored the provocation." Shepard and his crew sighed as HK walked to rejoin them.
"However, there's still the concern on why the Alliance decided to hide important facts from the Council, and what Commander Shepard plans to do with the droid."
"Send me," Shepard walked forward. "Send me into the Osamu system to the planet of Tezuka. I'll talk to the Geth, and I'll try to stop them."
"Nonsense." The Turian Councilman said. "Why would ever allow such a thing?"
"Because, I'll give you my word that the Alliance will give everything to know about the ship, and this droid."
The Council stood silent as the news reporters started talking amongst themselves.
"Fine. If the Alliance will hand over everything there is to know, then you'll go beyond the veil, alone."
"This meeting is dismissed." As the Asari Councilwoman closed up, all of the reporters rushed the stage. Apparently, Shepard's work had just begun.