TRAPPED
Synopsis: John, leader of the Resistance and the Hero of Mankind, makes the hardest decision of his life – one that he was fated to make. John/Cameron
Disclaimer: No monetary profit is being made from this story. The only profit that would be made is the knowledge that people will enjoy this piece.
A/N: This interesting little theory entered my mind whilst I was writing another story. I do not know if any fan-fics with a similar plot have been written, since I have not read all the TTSCC fan-fics out there. If there is such a story, I apologise for the unintended plagiarism. Constructive criticism is, as always, welcomed. Enjoy!
It had been two days since John had had his heart broken. Two days since he had come to realise the awful truth. John knew what he had to do. That didn't make it any easier, though. As soon as they had destroyed that factory, he knew that this was how it was supposed to be.
His footfalls echoed through the narrow hallways through the catacombs as he made his way to his sanctuary. The scars on his face were deep lined, but they were nothing compared to the scars that John struggled with inside, and the new ones he was about to add.
"John?" Without noticing, John had arrived at his quarters. Cameron was holding the door open, standing to one side and looking at him expectantly. As he looked at her now and as she looked at him, John felt sorely tempted to abandon his plan. He needed her here with him. He needed her by his side now, in this time.
But he knew that could not be. That Fate had already decided that this had to be done.
"Cameron," he replied, with a small smile. He walked up to her and kissed her gently. Taking her by the arm, he sat her down on his bed and sat down next to her. Her eyes searched his face.
"What's wrong, John?" Her uncanny ability to know his moods and feelings had nothing to do with her advanced ability to detect the subtle changes in human behaviour. She had come to know him well during her time with him. She had learned so much since he had first met her.
For a long time, he didn't respond. He didn't want to respond. But this was how it was. This was how it had to be. "Do you remember the factory we blew up? The one in which we found all the terminators of your model?"
"Yes, I do." Cameron looked perplexed. "Why?"
"None of your kind survived." He looked at her fully in the eyes. "You're the only one left."
"I know." She still looked confused. "But I don't understand why this disturbs you."
John elaborated with difficulty. "According to what you told me in the past, I would've encountered your model by now."
"Yes. My records indicate that I will be reprogrammed by you tomorrow."
John nodded. Tomorrow. It all fit. "But, as I've said, all terminators of your model were destroyed when we attacked the factory."
Then, almost as if a light bulb had been turned on in Cameron's head, a look of understanding overcame her face.
"You understand what I mean, don't you?"
Was it sadness that he saw in her eyes? Was it regret? He put his hand behind her head and pulled her towards him to kiss her tenderly. He tried to impart to her with the kiss how much he cared for her, how much he didn't want to do this.
When they broke apart, John realised he had tears in his eyes. Cameron's eyes also glistened strangely. "I understand," she said softly.
He stroked her cheek affectionately, and she leaned against his hand. "Don't worry," he tried to say light-heartedly, though he really felt as if his heart was dying. "You'll be with me again soon."
It was strange. In the past, John had always hated his future self, a person who seemed so removed from himself – a cold, calculating character, who did whatever needed to be done to achieve victory. As he had grown older, he had come to accept that person as a product of necessity. Mankind would not survive if he didn't learn to accept this person into himself.
But now, he felt jealous of his younger self, almost hateful of him; that now he had to send the one person left – for yes, she was a person to him – whom he loved. That she now had to part with him for the protection of his younger self, a person who would not fully appreciate her until much later.
"It won't be the same, will it?" Cameron mused. John knew he wasn't imagining the reluctance in her voice – reluctance to let him go, to let go all of what she had learned. "Will you wipe my memory?"
John nodded. "It has to be this way."
"Why?"
John sighed. "I can't afford to make any more changes to the past than I've already done. We don't know what the consequences would be if I sent you back with the knowledge you now have and you divulged them to my past self. It could change the course of history, and not necessarily in a positive way." He looked at her with sorrow, regret and guilt. "I can't risk that chance.
She understood, he thought. She knew why it had to be done. But it didn't make it any easier for either of them to bear. For John, it was almost as if she would be dying. In a way, she would be – the person, character, personality she had become would be gone forever.
"You know," John said softly, again stroking the side of her face, "I always knew something was special about you. And I wasn't wrong. You are special in more ways than either you or I realised." He kissed her. "I love you very much, Cameron. I always will."
"And I you," she responded. She pulled him towards her and kissed him with a passion John, in the past, would never have attributed to a machine. Clinging onto her tightly, not wanting to let her go, he spent the night with her, trying to grasp at the little they had left.
"What is your mission?"
"To protect you."
John nodded. He was running some last minute checks with Cameron, before sending her back. Her eyes, so full of emotion only a day before, were now blank and void of any feeling. Already he missed Cameron, missed her presence. Her body was here, but her soul was lost forever. Soon even her body would be gone.
"Good," he replied, in a remarkably steady voice, given his current state. He had erased most of her memory, only leaving information relevant to her mission intact. They had replaced her battery cells to ensure that she did not run out of energy half way through her mission, made sure that all her parts were in full operational order.
The sadness he felt was beyond words. The sooner he got this over, the better.
Nodding to the technicians at the terminals, he ordered them to initiate the time displacement equipment. "I'll take her in," he told them. They said nothing, even though they were discomforted by the affection their commander obviously had for the machine.
John closed the door behind Cameron and himself, and led her to the platform. He smiled at her. It was the only thing he could do to keep himself from crying. He might have been dying inside, but he couldn't let his men see him in a state of weakness. He didn't know how they would react if they saw him crying over a machine.
With a small nod, he indicated that she should mount the platform.
She stood a top the platform looking at him. A ball of blue electricity began to spark around her as the technicians initiated the process. The ball of light grew in intensity.
Knowing that this was the last time he would see her, in this time, John felt it safe to express his feelings, one last time. "I will miss you, love," he murmured.
John was shocked to see a small smile on Cameron's face. She appeared to say something. Then, before he could say anything, a flash of bright white light. Then she was gone.
Cameron stared at John as the machine hummed with the last stages of the process. Even over the din caused by the time displacement equipment, Cameron could hear what John murmured, something that would have been lost on other people, but not to her with her advanced hearing.
She smiled and murmured, "And I you."
