Author Note:

I think that we're getting ready to wind this one down… if there's anything left that you desperately want written about (baby showers, birth, engagement, etc) or explanations to things … please let me know. I take your thoughts into consideration, I promise!

Your feedback, currently, is rocking my world. Seriously. You're keeping this poor grad student going.

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"Troy, I just don't think I understand where you're going with this."

I nodded in understanding. "I suppose I just want to know what it would look like for me to take more of a supervisory role than being responsible for all of the art in the issue, like I am currently."

Andrew furrowed his brow and paused. He picked up the koosh ball that always lived on his desk and started messing around with it. After a few moments, he threw it at me.

"Dork."

I laughed and threw it back at him, "It's not a difficult question, Andrew!"

"Well, it wouldn't be if you would just ask it."

I stared him down. "Fine."

He smirked, "I'm waiting."

"Is it possible for me to move to Nairobi for a little while and still work here?"

"And why do you want to move to Nairobi, Troy?"

I'm going to kill him.

"I want to live on the same continent as Sharpay."

He laughed, "And there it is."

"Bastard."

"Of course."

"I also figure that these shots are good for a few years and I should get more out of them then just a month."

"Also an excellent point."

"So, your thoughts?"

He paused. "There's a lot of levels to this thing, Troy."

"I know."

"I mean, of course I can let you go. We own the damn company. As long as you live somewhere where you can check your email every day, I don't see why you can't do your work over there."

"Yeah."

"But there's no way in hell that I could let you go until my son is born."

I smiled. "You must remember that I live in fear of your wife on a daily basis."

"As you should."

We both started laughing and making comments about Gabi and how much we both kind of live under her control and then finally, he took a deep breath.

"So, how about this," Andrew pulled out a piece of paper and started scribbling notes to himself on it. "How about we say that you'll try to be over there by April 1st. That gives us time to really sort things out and also time for you to spend time with my kid."

"And to help you figure out how to be a dad," I smirked.

"As if you know what the hell you're doing," Andrew responded.

"Of course not. But everyone loves me and you take getting used to. Only logical that I'll be better at fatherhood than you," I laughed.

He made a face and threw the koosh ball at me again.

"Sad day, Morales! You're reduced to physical violence as a come back!"

"Shut up," he laughed.

We were interrupted by his computer alarm going off. We both checked our watches and realized that it was time to go.

"Damn, we're going to be late."

"She's going to kill you!"

"Me? She demanded your presence!"

"I'm not the one who knocked her up!"

"Whatever, she's going to kill both of us."

"Not if I beat you there!" I yelled as we both took off down the hallway to get to our cars.

I heard our assistants remark that we would never grow up as we both flew past them.

Growing up is so overrated.

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"Gabi, Andrew, are you sure?"

Gabi threw Andrew a look and I could see that she tightened her squeeze on his hand.

"We're sure."

Gabi was about six months along but they've been hemming and hawing about whether or not they wanted to know the sex of the baby. It went back and forth. But now, they were getting to the point where they realized that decorating the nursery and buying clothes would be easier if they knew what it was.

"Okay, then just hold on a minute and I'll get your baby to turn a little."

Gabi and Andrew were intertwined together and I was standing just behind them. As the ultrasound machine started it's magic, Gabi reached back and felt around for my head.

"Troy."

"Yes, Gabriella."

She pulled a little and I knew that eye contact was necessary. As I shifted around, I realized that I knew that look.

She was scared.

Gabi was scared.

Someone take note of this moment, because it didn't happen often.

"What's up, Gabi?"

She blinked back tears a few times and then kissed the top of my forehead. "I just needed to know that you were there."

"Always."

She nodded back and reached for my hand. She squeezed so hard that I may have lost circulation.

I realized after a few seconds that I was flexing my other hand, as though I was searching for something. Then I realized that I was searching for Sharpay. This moment was missing her.

My whole world was missing her.

Three weeks, four days. Three weeks, four days.

The doctor's voice drew me back to the exam room. "Well, Gabi, Andrew. I'd like to introduce you to someone."

We all had a sharp intake of breath.

"A boy," Gabi breathed out reverently.

"We're going to have a boy," Andrew echoed.

"Orville," I whispered under my breath.

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"Yeah?"

"Orville."

I shrieked so loudly that it echoed in the small restaurant that I was in. Yusef and I were having dinner to discuss some of my future options, but I had been staring at my cell phone for the past twenty minutes, waiting for Troy's call.

Yusef smiled and continued to eat his meal. He shook his head in laughter and I knew that he was thinking that I had become more American since falling in love with the photographer. Many people at Oxfam claimed that, actually.

"Healthy?"

"Both he and Gabi are doing great," Troy assured me.

"Is the due date still the same?"

"Yeah, they're figuring about February 15th."

"Excellent."

"Well, I'll let you get back to dinner. Call me when you're done."

"Will do."

As we hung up, I realized that I loved that he knew that he was calling in the middle of my dinner with Yusef. I also deeply loved that he told me that it was a boy by using the name that I had used! Gosh, how much did I love this man?!

"Sharpay," Yusef's voice cut through my thoughts.

"It's a boy," I grinned.

"Excellent."

We both went about the business of eating for a few moments, when Yusef broke the silence. "Shall we continue?"

I pursed my lips, "Sure."

"Like I said, I have been asked by the board to ask you why you will not renew your contract."

"It's complicated."

"Well un complicate it."

I paused for a moment and drank in my surroundings. The family sitting next to us was obviously wealthy as they were dressed in trendy western clothes. A few other fellow eaters were dressed in more traditional Kenyan garb, and the heavily accented English mixed with pure Swahili made me wonder if I really ever could leave this place.

I had given my heart to Kenya in ways that I had not done so anywhere else. Some of it was the fact that the Kenyan people were more open and hospitable than some of the other cultures I had lived in. I had been invited to simply do life along side of people in refreshing ways here.

It's something that Troy and I had talked about, actually, after going to visit Pascal and Dinah. They don't have a latch on their gate and it's not because they're not afraid for their safety. They pay a local boy to watch out for their house – partially to give him gainful employment and partially because it's a necessity. However, they keep the gate unlatched because they never want anyone to feel that they are not welcome or that there is a barrier between them and the Ovindas.

It's something that I want to do in my house, somehow, whenever I have one and whoever I have it with. Something to symbolize and communicate that all are welcome at all times. I've even thought long and hard about how to communicate community in my wedding.

Not that we're really anywhere near ready to get married. And it's not like I've been looking at bridal websites every day for the past week or anything…

"Sharpay," Yusef gently recalled me to the room and the matter at hand.

"Right, sorry, I got lost in my thoughts."

He smiled and patiently waited for me to continue.

"A very real reason is that I have been doing this work for about a decade and I'm exhausted. The day to day reality of wrestling with this monster is just kind of getting to me and I need a break," I remarked.

"We are prepared to offer you a sabbatical," he replied.

"And if that were the whole reason that I was leaving, I would take it in a heartbeat, dear friend."

"I see. Please continue."

"There is also the matter of my family. I know that my parents don't really factor into this, but I miss Ryan and Emily and Sarah. The older Sarah gets, the more I want to be a regular reality in her life. Also, I'd like to think about starting my own family."

Yusef paused, "May I be so bold, then? This is about the Troy."

I smiled at his use of the random definite article. "Yes, this is partially about the Troy."

He nodded once again and I could see the slight disappointment on his face. He couldn't bear the thought of me abandoning them for some boy, I knew, but I also knew that he didn't really understand where I was at emotionally.

"Yusef, regardless of if Troy and I work out and do the forever thing, I still believe that leaving is the right decision for me right now."

"How so?"

This was the stuff I was scared to say. This was the stuff that I was scared he would judge me for and would have every right to, actually.

"Yusef, I don't know how much of me is still running from that awful thing that happened in London."

Although I had never told Yusef the details of my marriage, Oxfam had given him so basic details about my emotionally fragile condition. I suppose that it should have spoken volumes to me that even seven years later, I was labeled as unstable.

"You see, I have just always moved whenever I felt myself getting close to people again. I think that I thought if I kept running, I would never be forced to fall in love again and never be… well… that's getting into details. But I'm not sure that my reasons for coming and my reasons for staying are all that pure."

He nodded empthathetically. "You have never been anything less than excellent at our job, though, Sharpay."

That brought tears to my eyes, "Thank you, Yusef. That is due in large part to you."

He scoffed that off, as I knew he would.

"Having the Troy here made me realize that there are a lot of things in my past that I'm not the most proud of and things that even scare me a little. While his reaction to this things in his life is to accept them and face them and deal, mine has been to run. I think that it's time for me to stop running."

"Then how will leaving Nairobi serve that? Won't you simply be running again?"

"Actually, no," I smiled. "I realized a little while ago that I could legitimately stay here for the rest of my natural life and be perfectly okay with it. I am petrified, however, to return to the states."

"So this is a personal decision more than a professional one," Yusef sumized.

I nodded, smiling a little. "Troy mentioned that it would be great if I could work with university students to help them clarify their calling in life, just as mine was clarified in Papua New Guinea. That sounds rather exciting. To be honest, I think I'm at a place in my life where I'm ready for a new adventure. The adventure of being an American again and living in the tension that I've been avoiding…"

He smiled. "I did not expect to come to this dinner and be proud of you for leaving us. That is how I find myself now."

The tears that had just been brewing on the tips of my eyelids came spilling over at that point. This was about the last reaction that I expected from Yusef.

He wasn't done, however. "Sharpay, you are a beautiful, brilliant woman. Your many talents and gifts will obviously take you wherever you want to go, but I agree with you that you can only go as far as your heart will let you. It is a very wise decision to take time to decide who you are outside of you job and it is indeed the scariest journey of all. It shows true strength of character that you are willing to take that journey and I would be a fool to stand in your way."

I bit my lip to stop myself from sobbing and instead whispered a quiet, "thank you."

We sat in silence for a few moments and I could hear quiet murmuring. I knew that Yusef was praying for me in Swahili and while that usually slightly annoyed me, it made this moment work. I could hear him ask his god for blessing upon my life and my journey and also for me and my Troy.

You know those few moments in life that you remember with so much detail because they are some how sacred? The ones that, twenty years after, you can remember what the air smelled like? This was one of those moments.

I savored it deeply as Yusef finished his prayer. I reached for his hand and squeezed it, thanking him for his understanding and grace.

He nodded and then smiled and then began to laugh.

"What is it, Yusef?"

"All of a sudden, I realize that this means that I must travel to America for your wedding and to bless your children whenever you have them. All this time, I have been thinking that I will never have to get on an airplane and now you will have me on one all the way to America!"

Leave it to Yusef to think of that.

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