I am just waiting to see the finale, scared if the spoilers are true and still hoping for the best...Tosh is and has always been my fav character, so...hope you like it...I don´t have a beta and my language is no English (quite easy to see) but still, hope you like it...it´s Tosh in Fragments.
Tosh felt the excruciating pain the second her body touched the ground. It had been a terrible way to start a day. She had been tired after spending the night talking with Owen in the hub. She had stayed late to fix some software problems, well...actually, she had decided to leave that till late so she could stay a bit longer with Owen. Not that she was hoping for anything to happen between them, no, she had given up that hope a long time ago, since the day he died. She just wanted to stay there, talk to him, as he couldn´t sleep, so that the night was not so boring for him. She still loved him but she was determined to be a good friend. Maybe they were not meant to be together in this life, but she had some kind of hope that maybe, one day, or in another life, she was going to have the chance to know how it felt to get a real kiss form doctor Harper.
She had stayed up all night with him, just talking about life and death, about Cardiff and London, about the things she loved to do when she was a student and of his hectic days as a living young man. She knew that he was not being completely honest with her, that there were things he hide from her and everyone else, things from his past that were too painful. She was not hurt by that, she had her own secrets and she was in no hurry to tell him about the fear and desperation she felt in that tiny cell where UNIT locked her for something that had not even been her fault. She shuddered remembering the cold fear that had controlled her while she was waiting for a miracle.
-"I am going to die here, alone, in silence, in the darkness"-Was all she could think about in that cell. Everyday, she prayed to be released but it never happened.-"I will never know love, I will wither away. I have all this talent, all this intelligence and I will die here, in such a pointless way. I always wanted to save lives, to do something special, to live adventures, to know a man and fall in love in such a way that I would love him forever, no matter what."
She had cried, and then she had stopped crying one day, dry and broken. Sitting there, in the floor, with nothing more to say or think. It was all over, so she just hoped she could die soon.
Jack Harkness had saved her, yes, that much was true. The first weeks had been awkward, just the two of them working in that huge place. A few days later Jack introduced her to a young woman, Suzie. She had been on a mission in Scotland and at first Tosh was scared of her. She was so fierce and Tosh was still so scared. The nightmares were terrible, she dreamt of tiny cells and dusty floors where life was of no importance and death was all that was waiting for you.
Tosh had tried to call the others, while she was there in the floor, crushed by all the rubble, but she was in too much pain and all she could do was cry silently, hoping to be rescued once again.
Suzie had liked Tosh, she was quiet and not a threat, as she was not interested in power; Suzie knew they were never gonna have to fight to see who was going to make the decisions. Slowly, Tosh started to feel comfortable in that place, so much that she tried to rent a flat as close to the hub as she could. She spend there every second and tried to avoid the streets, just in case. She was sure that one day UNIT was going to come back for her.
Just when she started to feel better, Jack brought them a new member for the team. Suzie had not liked Owen too much at first, although everyone knew that the feeling had changed with time. Owen Harper was a strong, determined, brilliant man, with a serious attitude problem, specially at first. He was arrogant, cocky, abusive sometimes. So Tosh had avoided him as much as possible during his first weeks. He was too rude, too loud, too dangerous. She was scared of him and hated him for making her feel insecure again.
One evening, while she was fixing a cable, she heard a sound, something like a sob, but she wasn´t sure. It came from the autopsy room, where doctor Harper was doing an autopsy to the ugliest weevil ever. She thought that what she had heard was probably just the sound of the doctor tearing up the dead alien to see if it was uglier inside. But then she heard it again. It was definitely the sound of someone that was crying but was trying to do it silently. She saw him, sitting on the floor, his head between his hands, crying like a baby. It was heartbreaking. She wondered what had happened to this man to make him suffer so much.
Since that day she had decided to be nicer to him, to try to get to know him. Maybe there were not so different after all. He had laughed at her at first, but a few weeks later he had let her to get a bit closer. They had started talking and in a year they were the closest thing to a friend that either of them had. Tosh started to walk next to him in missions and Owen started to rely on her more than in the other members of the team. Whatever he did, he knew Tosh would help and defend him. They were always working together, so Jack decided to place their workstations one next to the other, so that they could work without having to shout all the time. Suzie had her own space a bit away from them and wasn´t very interested in their conversations, so Owen and Tosh were always talking and that led to a new period in their lives.
She had fallen for him, but it had not happened on one day, it was a slow process, and she was sure that she was going to love him up until her last living second.
She shuddered, she wasn´t ready to die. She couldn´t help but think about Owen. She hoped he was fine, that the explosion had not hurt him in any way as he was unable to heal. Well, at least he couldn´t die again. She didn´t want to die and leave Owen on his own. She was scared and for once, she really understood the way Owen talked about death. The terror in his eyes when he talked about the darkness. God, she wanted to hug him more than anything else.
-"Please, I need to survive"-She pleaded, the pain was unendurable.
-"Tosh!"- She heard Gwen´s voice. Tosh closed her eyes, tears running down her cheeks, leaving clean lines in he dirty face. She was going to be rescued, once again.